PART 9

As the paramedics rolled him into the ambulance, J-JOE could see the body of The Scar-Face Reaper was missing. He heard someone talking to him, but he couldn't really make out what they were saying. His ears hurt. His body hurt, actually everything hurt; like, a lot. He could hear all of the voices, and all of the sounds, but he just couldn't make out what they were saying. It's funny that he could hear so much, but the most that he could make out was just the sound of his own voice, speaking to himself, saying 'you can't die, not you! You can't die!'

The ambulance made its way down the highway towards the hospital. It was full of police, fire trucks, and flashing lights. J-JOE had a feeling that he was going to make it through the night. He was getting better with the drugs, that was the only thing. He could feel his head throbbing, and it was making it hard for him to think. The paramedics did their best to keep him conscious, but he was losing focus on the hospital, what was going on around him. His ears continued to bleed as the ambulance took off. He saw flashing red lights, heard sounds, but he couldn't understand any of it.

"You can't die, don't you! You can't die!" He couldn't say anything else, his body wouldn't listen to his mind. His body hurt too much to open his mouth. He felt pain in his leg and a broken rib, but his body still wanted to keep moving.

As they rolled him into the hospital, J-JOE saw all of the news cameras and reporters gathered outside. He recognized a few of them from his past, but he couldn't focus on anything that was going on around him. It was hard to make sense of what anyone was saying, much less recognize them. He couldn't really remember anything, except his name. He remembered his own name, and he could even make some sense of that. His voice filled the hospital room and the world, and the voices would come and go; like clouds in a storm. The doctors and nurses were running around the room asking what happened, if he was going to be alright.

They couldn't put him under and do anything else. Not without killing him, and maybe even then it wouldn't make a difference. He could feel every broken bone in his body. Every inch of his skin was throbbing. He could feel all of the medication flowing through his body, and they were trying to calm him down. He was so much trouble they had called in some of the best doctors in the city. He was hooked up to machines, and he was losing his hearing and his vision. They kept him in a fog. The more his mind cleared the more his body hurt. All of his muscles and bones were in agony, and it was hard to talk to anyone. He felt so weak. He was too weak to keep fighting the pain.

All he wanted was sleep. All he wanted to do was to sleep and wake up to find out this was all a bad dream. He heard the doctors talking to the nurses and he thought he heard one of them say they were going to get more of that pain meds. He didn't know if he was dreaming or not. He kept hearing them talk about getting more of those pain meds, and then he heard one of them say it again; they were going to get more of the pain meds. A flock of reporters attempted to enter J-JOE's room, but they had to be escorted out by the hospital security. It was the early morning hours and J-JOE had managed to get up and stumble to the door. As he stumbled out of the room he could see the flashes of news cameras recording the scene. They kept trying to get into the room to speak to him, but they kept being escorted out. but they had to be escorted out by the hospital security. It was the early morning hours and J-JOE had managed to get up and stumble to the door. As he stumbled out of the room he could see the flashes of news cameras recording the scene. They kept trying to get into the room to speak to him, but they kept being escorted out.

That was until J-JOE heard the voice of one reporter, Shelley Hauswirth, and that's when he remembered what the old lady on the phone said; that Hauswirth would be there to help him if he survived. Well he survived, so she's here now. A nurse led Hauswirth into the room.

The reporters and hospital personnel had crowded the room. They had turned off the alarms on the machines and lights. He heard voices of Hauswirth, and doctors, asking him questions and trying to figure out what was going on. His body was still hurting, but his head was clearing now. He couldn't really see them, but he did see Hauswirth's blonde hair.

She was talking to one of the doctors, and he had a good view of her pretty face. "Is there anything else he needs? Can he get any more meds? He's been going through so much pain. They need to keep him going and up." The nurses nodded, and they began to bring more pain meds to his bedside. They talked amongst themselves and wondered what else he needed. It was only after about 30 minutes that J-JOE was able to open his mouth and speak.

"S-Shelley Hauswirth?" J-JOE asked.

Hauswirth turned around swiftly, and stared at him, "Yes, it's me. Can you talk?"

J-JOE looked at her, and his eyes were open and his pupils dilated. It was hard to focus on her, and he had to really concentrate on her.

"The Scar-Face Reaper."

Hauswirth stood there and looked at him. J-JOE smiled, and his teeth were bleeding. He was trying to focus on Hauswirth and trying to think what to say. He looked like he was in a lot of pain. His body was in so much agony.

"You've been in some trouble, haven't you?" J-JOE asked her.

"A few times, yeah, but nothing I couldn't handle. I'm not just a reporter you know." Hauswirth smirked, "You never get used to it. The killings, being a target, uncovering the killer; it… It becomes a part of your life, but, you just… You can't, and it haunts you."

"What do you mean?" Asked J-JOE curiously.

"A few years ago I was caught up in my first real-life slasher movie - Grim, New Jersey was an interesting town but it was terrorized by a serial-killer looking to get famous. He taunted me and teased me, he called me often, and then it turns out it wasn't just one killer; it was two. And what makes it worse was it was someone I trusted, he was a detective. He was charming, I felt safe around him, not even once did I think this person could be a serial-killer, Hauswirth paused, "Those two killed for the fun of it, the sick bastards."

J-JOE watched Hauswirth carefully.

"That's when I realized what it was like to be in the middle of something big, and no one around you knew who you were. I learned a lot in those couple of weeks. I learned to never trust anyone, not even people I thought were good people. Because I didn't understand how people could be so evil, so brutal, it made me think, "Was I good enough to trust? Or was I just being naïve?"

Hauswirth's tone became softer, "I learned not to trust my own judgment, or the instincts I get. I learned a lot about myself and those around me. It's been a few years now and I'm almost over it, but I still think about it every time. I still think about what I should have done, what I should have said, what I could have done to save lives. I still think about those two..."

Hauswirth paused, staring at the floor, "But there's one thing I've learned more than anything else, it's the only thing I learned through this," Hauswirth looked J-JOE in the eye, "Trust no one, because no one is completely trustworthy."

"Earlier you said something about it being a few times this has happened to you, what happened after the New Jersey Incident?" J-JOE asked.

"After the incident in Jersey, I thought my story was done, I thought I would finally move on and go back to my second job as a paranormal show host, but I was wrong."

"What happened?"

"More masked killers started showing up, each wanting a taste of my attention. One wore a banana suit, and was revealed to be my editor, another had a Frankenstein mask, and yeah, she was my sister-in-law, etc. etc. Just... People are crazy sometimes, but after a while you learn how to survive unharmed. Sometimes it feels like a chore, a big blood filled chore. Eventually, though, the FBI took notice of my repeated survival against masked killers, so they've hired me to aid people like you."

J-JOE sat there not knowing what to say.

Hauswirth stood up, "Thank you for hearing me out. You know… I'm not used to doing this. I was brought in by the police to help out and I couldn't really refuse, so, thanks for that." Hauswirth smiled at J-JOE, "I'm sure you're a good reporter, but if you'd like to check up on me, I don't mind if you call it. If not, that's okay too. I'm used to being the one to call the shots."

J-JOE nodded, "I think that's a better idea. Thanks." Hauswirth left the room. J-JOE's hospital room was quiet. The walls throughout the hallways were a smooth cream color, like the hospital's exterior. The floor was a gray, carpeted hospital tile, which looked a little bit dirty. There were a few windows on each side of the room, but they all had drapes and blinds. It was not a welcoming area. It felt like the walls would press on your head if you stared at them too long.

J-JOE didn't move a muscle as he lay in the hospital bed, then Thomas walked into the room.

"Oh my god! No! J-JOE! What happened?" Thomas looked at J-JOE in shock.

"Nothing, I just... It was nothing, don't worry about it." J-JOE said.

"I heard about it, Why didn't you tell me you were being hunted by The Scar-Face Reaper?"

"It's okay, Thomas. It's all right, I'm fine."

"J-JOE!" Thomas grabbed J-JOE by the arms, "Look at you, you're so pale! Why didn't you run away? You could've come to my house, and we would play video-games. We could've done anything! All alone, in a strange town, without friends. I should have come for you! I'm so stupid!" Thomas' voice started to rise, "Why didn't I come for you? Why couldn't you have trusted me?"

"It's not your fault. I made the decision myself, I was alone and I wanted to stay that way." J-JOE smiled, "We can play video-games if you want, Thomas, I'm a pretty good gamer, I just... I needed some time to think, I had a lot on my mind."

Thomas didn't respond.Thomas turned and stared out of the window, he stood with palm touching the pane, Thomas sighed, "I don't know why I'm so angry with you, I can't stop. It's like there's some part of me that hates seeing you alive, I can't stop it. J-JOE why won't it stop!? I hate it so much, I... I..."

"It's okay, Thomas, really, it's all right."

Thomas turned around, "Could I sit with you?"

J-JOE moved over slightly so he could give Thomas some space, J-JOE knew he would never see Thomas again after this. Thomas leaned into J-JOE, J-JOE could feel his warm breath.

"I'm sorry for what I said, J-JOE." Thomas said,

J-JOE grabbed Thomas' hands. J-JOE knew that he wouldn't see Thomas again after this either. J-JOE and Thomas' eyes locked on each other. J-JOE didn't look away as Thomas ran his hand through J-JOE's brown hair. J-JOE grabbed Thomas' hands. J-JOE knew that he wouldn't see Thomas again after this either. J-JOE and Thomas' eyes locked on each other. J-JOE didn't look away as J-JOE ran his hand through Thomas's black hair. J-JOE leaned into Thomas, J-JOE was surprised to feel Thomas' heart beating. He put his hands around the back of Thomas' neck. J-JOE held onto Thomas' hands.

They both enjoyed their moment together. It was as if they were sharing a secret, and they both liked it. Thomas pulled away. J-JOE didn't pull away, but he stared at Thomas with his eyes half closed and a soft smile on his lips. He was almost in a trance. It was an incredible moment. He didn't want it to end. He wanted to spend more time with Thomas, but he had to be serious. He knew Thomas could change at any moment, and it would devastate him if he wasted his one and only moment with him. He had to set Thomas' mind at ease. He had to be firm. He had to be a man. J-JOE looked Thomas dead in the eyes, never letting go of his hands. He held on as if his life depended on it. Thomas nodded his head in understanding.

J-JOE nodded, as he said, "Thomas...we need to talk..."

"Yes?" Thomas said. "Go ahead."

"Remember when we first met?" J-JOE said.

"Yes?" Thomas replied.

"You had me fooled, didn't you?" J-JOE said.

"Yes, of course," Thomas replied.

"It was more like a dream than real life," J-JOE said. "Remember?"

"I remember," Thomas said. "I remember everything."

"I liked that about you," J-JOE said. "You were a dreamer, and you were very, very sweet. I was never sure how I felt about you, though. I like you, I guess, but I'm confused."

"What do you mean?" Thomas asked.

"Well, I didn't really know you when we first met, but I liked you because I knew you were kind and sweet, and I didn't have to make much of an effort to like you. It was an easier way of making friends. You made an effort with me, but it was easy. I feel I have to impress you now, don't I? That's very different from the way I was with you before. I don't know if it's good or bad, but I know you have no clue what I'm talking about."

"You're different with me now, aren't you?" Thomas asked.

"Yes, I guess. I don't know. It's just my way of being. I think it's because of the feelings we've had. The memories we've shared together throughout the years. Do you know how many memories we've made?" J-JOE said.

"Many?" Thomas asked.

"Yes. A lot of them have been with you, but the last few have been with me. I know I need to tell you about them, but I can't be serious until you know the truth about yourself, don't you think?" J-JOE said.

"The truth?"

"Yes," J-JOE said, "Tell me, Thomas. What do you think of yourself?" J-JOE asked.

"I think I'm a good person." Thomas responded.

"Do you think you're a bad person?" J-JOE asked.

"No. Why would you ask me such a question?" Thomas asked.

"Why do you say that, Thomas?" J-JOE asked.

"What are you getting at?" Thomas asked.

"I'm trying to figure out what you think about yourself, Thomas. What's your answer? Do you feel good about yourself? Or is there some part of you that wishes that you could change?" J-JOE asked.

"No, I'm happy with who I am. I'm proud of my accomplishments and I've tried to be a good person." Thomas said.

"Thomas, let's talk about the events that took place at the school today. Do you know why Liam is dead?" J-JOE asked.

"No."

Thomas said. "I don't know why he died. There were a lot of people who died and that makes me sad."

"How do you think that Liam died?" J-JOE asked.

"He was stabbed. He's dead. There's nothing that I can say to change that," Thomas said.

"What do you mean, you can't say anything?" J-JOE asked.

"I don't have any answers. Nothing that I can think of to say to change that, J-JOE. There's nothing I can do." Thomas said.

"Do you think that he had the choice to live or die, Thomas? Or did he have no control?" J-JOE asked.

"What are you getting at?" Thomas asked.

"Do you believe that life is sacred or do you think that it's something that was designed by someone or something?" J-JOE asked.

"I don't know. I guess you could say it was designed. There's nothing I can say about Liam's life. I'm not his mother. I don't know how he lived or why he died," Thomas said.

"Do you believe that Liam's death had any impact on you?" J-JOE asked.

"I don't know."

"Do you have any feelings about it, Thomas?" J-JOE asked.

"Not really. We all have to die. You just don't know when," Thomas said.

J-JOE sat for a while and then said, "Thomas, this is very important for me to discuss with you. Are you sure that you are happy and feel good about yourself?" J-JOE asked.

"Yes."

J-JOE asked, "Thomas, do you feel that people are sometimes not happy about what they are doing and things that are happening? Does this happen a lot to you?"

"Sometimes."

"What do you think about when you are experiencing this?" J-JOE asked.

"I don't really know. I guess I try to make it work for me," Thomas said.

"Do you feel like you are able to control what you do or do you feel like it just happens to you?" J-JOE asked.

"I guess it's a bit like that. I think that I can try to control a bit of what happens to me but other things happen to me. I just have to try to make the best of it. You don't know what's going to happen next so you have to make the most of what happens to you and try to be happy," Thomas said.

J-JOE then thought carefully about his next sentence, "Thomas, do you think that if someone does something horrible, but they do not remember committing the act, that they're a bad person?"

"I don't know. I can't say that they're bad people. What do you mean?" Thomas asked.

"I don't mean that they're bad; I mean, if they did commit the act, but don't remember doing it, can you say that they're bad because they committed a horrible act?" J-JOE asked.

"That would be unfair to say. They may not have committed it at all," Thomas said.

"I guess I can't really say that. If someone did something terrible and didn't know that they did it, can you say that they are a bad person because they're capable of doing such a terrible thing? But if they know what they did and they're capable of doing it, they are a bad person," J-JOE said.

"Okay. So, do you think that the person who committed the act is still a bad person even if they don't remember doing it?" J-JOE asked.

"I guess so, yes. I think you're going to have to have other evidence to prove that they did it. Someone might get in trouble for committing a bad act, and then not know they did it. Then they'd be a bad person, but not remember what they did, do you understand what I'm trying to say?." Thomas said.

"Yes… Yes I do."J-JOE teared up, thinking about Thomas's answer. Even if Thomas was unaware of his crimes, he still committed them, and he should be held accountable for them, "Thank you, Thomas."

Thomas nodded. "You're welcome." Thomas laid there with J-JOE blissfully unaware of the mass amounts of murders he commits on a daily basis.