Our Hearts Knew They Belonged Together

Caleb point of view

her lips were on mine and It felt wrong. you could say I was being dramatic but I wasn't, it felt like strawberry flavoured slime was running along my lips and I couldn't take it. I pull away "s- stop it!" I wipe my hand across my lips and drop it to my side. "I can't do this, not to Xavier. I can't" I rake my hands through my hair and groan in frustration. "I can't"

I hear her laugh lightly and I look up at her. she looked upset and she was crying. "Caleb, I'm gonna go home and wait for my mom" she stands to her feet and looks down at me. "I want you to think about it, I want you to forget about Castor for a second and think about what you're going to be risking by not picking me"

I watch her walk to the door and I take a deep breath. "his name is Xavier, not Castor, he's not a risk, he's a person that I care about and that cares about me too, just like every other person in my life. my family and yours" I exhale.

"well, you care for him more than you should, you care about him more than you care about your own family and that is messed up" she opens the door and leaves, slaming the door hard.

I sigh and bury my face in my hands. what the fuck am I doing?. someone knocks on my door and I know it was my dad because his knock was the same tune as pop goes the weasle, it was weird but it was his thing and I loved him for it. I don't get up to get the door but I answered. "yeah?"

"can I come in?" I hear him ask, and since I didn't want him to get suspicious that something was up and call papi, I say he could. "what happened? Sophie left without even saying goodbye to us" he walked towards the bed and sat where Sophie had sat just minutes ago.

"it was nothing, we had a disagreement and she didn't like my choices" I said and lifted my head from my hands when I was sure my eyes were dry. I try to give him a reassuring smile but who the hell am I kidding.

"a simple disagreement wouldn't make you cry, Cal" his hand reaches into my hair and he pulls my head down into his lap, running it through my locs. "what really happened?"

I don't say anything because I didn't want him to know I was going to betray him and pick Xavier, so I sigh and say. "it was nothing"

"can you at least give me something to hold onto, so I know that you're alright or at least going to be?" he says with an exasperated voice. "I can call your papi if you'd talk better with him?" he suggested.

i loved both Dad and papi dearly but the thing is that I'm kind of closer with papi. growing up with both dads, I was always jealous of luke and his closeness to papi, I was so jealous that I wedged myself between them under the guise of learning Spanish. it pissed me off that Luke and papi had a secret language and it hurt me even more that they had blood ties.

one day when I was eight, I had gotten upset that papi and Luke went out and had gotten ice cream and gone shopping without me and I said everything that I'd been holding back, that I felt left out of Papi's heart and that I was jealous of how close they were.

I guess that was the push he had needed. after the whole debacle, I was always with papi and Luke was always with Dad, it wasn't picking favourites, it was just picking who we needed to get to know better and when Diana came into our lives, the shitheads that called themselves our fathers dumped us for Young blood.

"that smile is strange, stop it" Dad's fingers were still running through my hair. "what are you smiling about?"

"about how you abandoned me for Young blood" I said and snuggled closer to him

"young bl... Diana?" he asked

"who else, you and your evil husband dumped me and Luke the second you hand a younger baby to smother" I said, my voice soft so he would understand that I was kidding.

"well, you were both old men and wouldn't let us smother you, so we gave you shelter and sustenance and let you take care of yourselves" his smile is relaxed. "honestly, we were hoping you'd fight to the death for a bag of chips"

"you too are terrible parents"

"yeah, but we birthed three awesome kids" he said and sighs, leaning back, his fingers never stoping in my hair.

"how did you know you were in love with Papi?" the words find their way out and I didn't even bother to stop them.

"uhh, at first I thought he had a really nice ass" I groan at his joke and he chuckles. "just kidding, just kidding" his laugh vibrates in his stomach and I actively try to keep myself from laughing. "...your papi was a weird man, he had nails painted all kinds of colours, he had lip gloss on and never tried to hide his femininity, everyone thought he was crazy and very gay but I was gay so i was pretty interested, if you know what I mean" he nudges me a little and I Chuckle.

"stop that. Dios mios, you're so freaking weird" I told him and he laughs.

"hey, stop interrupting my story, I'm trying to tell you about love" he clears his throat dramatically and I groan. "hush, child... he was the first gay man I'd ever met and at first I thought he was a tad bit strange but as I got to know him, I thought Cameo was nice. his smile made me smile, the way he walked and talked seemed strange to a lot of people but as long as it was him, it was perfect.

the way he laughed made me want to laugh, when he cried, I wanted to tear whoever hurt him apart, I wanted him to never ask for anything he wanted in this world because I wanted to be the one to give it all to him

whenever he walked into a room I couldn't stop looking at him and when he looked at me the same way I looked at him, every piece of my broken heart fell into place and reached for his because both our hearts knew they belonged together and both our hearts knew that was the place they wanted to stay forever" his voice breezes through the words like they was no doubt in them and I was so sure that there wasn't because what he felt for papi was bright and what papi felt for him was even brighter. "are you... are you crying?"

"shut up, I'm not crying" he reached for my eyes and wiped them.

"do you think you're in love?" I thought about the question for a second.

"no" not yet at least. I didn't think Xavier was my forever heart caller but I did think that I was getting there. "dad, if you knew you'd be hurting someone that you loved by doing something they would hate, would you still do it?"

"does this thing you're going to do make you happy?" he asks and looks down at me.

I didn't need anyone to tell me he did "yeah"

"and are you physically hurting any one?"

"no"

"then do it. if it's going to make you happy and you're not going to become the next Jeffery Dahmer, go for it" I laugh but his tone becomes serious. "Caleb, I had to fight for your dad and I'd do it a hundred times over, if I had let what ifs and whatevers stop me from letting go of everything and going for your dad, I would have hated myself"

I shut my eyes tight as tears gather in the them. I reach my hand into my hair and take his hand and hold it. "I don't know what I'm gonna do about how I feel but I'm going to try to make the best choice for me, I can't really explain what's going on but I promise I'll tell you when I'm ready" he squeezes my hand tight.

"okay, I trust you and I love you" he whispers.

"what are you two doing, gossiping about us?" we both look up and see dad, Luke and Dianna standing there.

"nah, just here chilling and winning the best parent award" papi snorts loudly sits by dad.

"you okay, honey?" he reaches over dad and taps my forehead lightly.

"yeah dude, you look depressed, someone die?" Luke chimes in.

"yeah, Caleb, are you and Xavier not getting married any more?" Diana crawls into my lap as she speaks.

"no, Dianna" I groan and place my hand on my forehead where Papis fingers still lay. "nah, it's nothing, as long as you guys are here with me, everything will be great"

"cheesy" Luke says. my phone chimes and Luke picks it up, looks at the screen and smiles.

"what?" I ask.

"goodnight, daddy" he says in what think is Xavier's voice.

"oh my god, moment over, all of you leave, get out and never return" I shoot up from dads lap and start screaming at them to leave. it takes awhile and a lot of push and shoving but they do but not without a fight.

after I shove the last of them out, I pick up my phone and look at the screen.

"good night Daddy" it was punctuated with about four heart and a kiss. my stomach fills up with butterflies and I imagine kissing Xavier again. it would feel right, not like it did with sophie. it would feel right

"good night, baby" I add as many hearts as he did and smile.

i was falling in love with him, yeah, I was getting there.