Five: What should be my first step?

I tried hard not to stare at the two huge males behind me. I walked up to the front door. I'm nervous no doubt and why not? I haven't been here in years, I looked up at the house, taking in the green ivy that snaked up the pipes. The house was painted a dark red and cream colour. It's nowhere of a mansion like the one I just left a few hours ago, or my father's, but it was comfortable enough for the woman that lived within the four walls. The past two days had been a blur of boring events. The new week has begun, and I don't have any idea on what the first step I should take, so I had to come here to ask for help.

I stared at the door again, the back of my neck perspiring greatly. I formed a fist, raised it up. I took in a deep breath.

You can do this, You can do this.

My fist hadn't reached the door, when the door swung open.

I retreated staring at the old woman who stood in the doorway. Her hair is ash in colour, eyes as green as grass. Her nose is straight, and there isn't even the slightest wrinkle on her aging face. Her lips are thin and a pale peach. She is wearing a blue woolen gown and black boots.

"I was expecting a maid", I say, looking at her.

"I sent them away", she says eyeing my Jimmy Choo heels, Chanel purse and dress. "What are you doing here?"

"Can't I come see my mother again?".

She rolled her eyes. "How long has it been?".

Sixteen years. I haven't seen her in sixteen years. She didn't even show up at my wedding. She hasn't been a part of my life in sixteen years. And even in the years she was in my life, she hadn't been very welcoming. Will she be now once she finds out that my marriage is falling apart?

"What's with the two men behind you?".

"Oh. You mean Fergus and Pajero? They're my bodyguards".

"Hmm. I'm surprised he didn't assign you one sooner". She looks at them. "Hello boys. You hungry?".

They politely declined, but my mother wasn't having any of that. She ushered us in, and had us sit at the dining, before serving us each a plate of fried rice and turkey.

I ate very little, while the men wolfed down their plate, downing their glasses of cranberry juice. I never really knew if she approved of my marriage, and I never bothered to ask.

"That's exactly what I wanted to talk to you about".

Her mood shifted. She looked to the men.

"Could you guys please excuse us? I want to talk my daughter alone".

The men looked between themselves. "Oh I'm sure we won't take long. And she's perfectly safe with me. You see, I can never hurt my own daughter".

That's a lie. She has hurt me every time she treats me like I didn't come out from her womb. The men were convinced and left. Once she was certain they were out of sight, she stood up from where she sat and beckoned for me to follow her. I did. She stopped until we reached the balcony. There's a table out there, that is donned by two chairs. She sits, and gestures for me to sit and I do.

"What about the Lewry? Has he finally gotten tired of your wasteful spending and decided to end it?".

It was then I knew she didn't approve. I didn't know how to feel about that, but deep down, I wished she did.

"Kian has never complained about my wasteful spending mother, and I really didn't appreciate if you refer to him as my husband".

She narrows her eyes. "Are you giving me orders now in my own house?".

"No. I will never. I'm just saying that...", I trailed off.

She stares imploringly at me, and I take a deep breath.

"Kian wants to end things with me mum and I don't want to stop being Mrs. Lewry. And it's not about the money. I like him a lot mother. I like being married to him.

"Tell me everything dear".

I did.

"Does your father know?".

"No, and it's better that way. I don't know what to do mum. I don't even know what Kian expects me to be during these six weeks".

"He expects you to be a wife".

I wipe away a stray tear. "What do you mean?".

I'm sorry if this sounds offensive, but you haven't been a wife. A wife doesn't spend every dime on unnecessary things. A wife, doesn't spend the time she's supposed to take care of her husband, at the mall. A wife doesn't let another woman cook for her husband. A wife doesn't let another woman wash for her husband. A wife doesn't let another woman care for her husband".

"Maybe I don't know much about being a wife, but I do know that a wife doesn't abandon her kids!".

My mother's gaze softened at my words. "I didn't abandon you child".

"You did. You were never there mum. When I needed you, you weren't there. You didn't even show up at my wedding".

"Because I didn't approve. And I'm really surprised the Lewry hasn't divorced you already. I mean, I would have divorced my wife sooner if I had found naked in an unknown alley with no remembrance of what happened before. Who knows what could have happened before she was found. Who knows what she could have met".

"Mother enough!", I tell her. "I've already gotten enough from Kian. So will you help me or not?".

"If I say yes, will you put an end to your wasteful spending?".

"It's not wasteful spending mother. And I love shopping. You know it! Everybody knows it!".

"If you keep up with that attitude, you're going to get divorced sooner than you think".

I roll my eyes. "Will you help me or not?".

"I don't see why I should".

"Oh mother can you not be like this right now? I know you don't approve of my marriage, but would you want to see the news of my divorce on the headlines? If that happens you'll have the paparazzi on your back, and your life will be noisy once more".

She pursed her lips. "If I say yes, will you stop your wasteful spending?".

"I'll try. It won't be easy, but I'll try."

"I will help you".

"Thank you! Oh thank you! So what should be my first step?".

"Cooking dear. You'll have to learn how to cook for your husband".

My mouth drops open. "You've got to be kidding me. We have maids for that!".

"Oh don't be silly Farrah. I'm not against you having maids. All I'm saying is take charge of your kitchen.

"Nope. Not doing that. Think of something else".

"Will you stop being so childish and just listen?".

I cross my arms and pout. "Fine. I'm listening ".

"Good. The only way to a man's heart is through food Farrah".

"Hmm. I've always thought it was sex. Lots and lots of sex".

She glared at me. "Well stop thoughting and start thinking. If you want to save what's left of your marriage, it's best if you start cooking for your husband".

"I tried to cook once mother, and I blew up a kitchen! A kitchen!".

"Because you didn't get proper training".

"Even if I did, It has to be more than a week. I can't learn how to cook in one week!".

"I'll teach you. You just show up here at 7 sharp, and we'll get down to business".

"Why are you helping me? I mean you didn't even approve of my marriage to begin with".

"See this as an apology for all the times I was never there".

"Thank you. You don't know how much this means to me".

"If I didn't, I wouldn't be doing this. Now go home. Your boys are already here".

I incline my head to look at Fergus and Pajero who were standing by the door. I smile sheepishly at them.

"Okay. Guess I'll be going home now. Bye".