Chapter 025

Hoping to get what I want without trying is a big lie. It would be hypocritical to say I never expected to be able to get what I wanted without working hard. I rely on incessant prayer without doing anything, isn't a result obtained with a struggle and prayer?

I thought I couldn't possibly enter this fairly elite campus, but it turned out to be just a negative thought that I always generated in my emptiness. I forgot the fact that I had worked hard, and almost one hundred percent of the anxiety I generated came from my own imagination.

Stupid? That's right, and sadly I've been in that position.

Not anymore, I feel I'm mature enough to be able to face anything. I believe in what my father said at the time, he said I was strong even without him, so was Verrel. The difference is, that man always tests my mentality by giving a harsh reality that I sometimes have to accept, he always trains me to become a person who can be as tough as a rock without any shield.

I understand what the shield means, the people closest to me can never be by my side forever. After all, I was the main character who had to save myself.

One more thing, in the past I didn't have friends who were so close to me, they were just location friends. I spend a lot of time in the library, a little different from now. I have Chelsy who sometimes asks us out together, I understand when she is lonely, she also once said that I was the first friend she had.

When she was in school, she always got bullied from her school friends, she said because she was sick, fortunately now her illness has disappeared. However, can I just believe it? Especially when I saw her near the convenience store she was carrying a plastic bag which I believe contained medicine.

But somehow she chose not to tell me. When I asked her why she was looking for me, she replied that she only wanted to stop by for a moment, even though it was clear she could have called me first if she wanted to see me.

You could say we were close enough to each other, some of Chelsy's life experiences I knew from her own mouth, and vice versa. However, since our argument in the library, we don't talk to each other anymore. The next day when I met her, she seemed to avoid me. I can already guess the reason clearly, it's just that I don't think that's too childish?

I can say sorry to her, but she doesn't seem to want to hear what comes out of my mouth. Chelsy, why did she change? Was my mistake yesterday so fatal?

She didn't come in today, I heard she was sick. I think what I saw then was true. However, I can't visit her today or tomorrow, I'm busy with assignments that are piling up, I'm just getting less sleep because I have to work extra to find a part-time job for me.

I haven't managed to find a part time job until now, they always put experience first. Come on, if you guys accept me, I can gain experience from it.

At least, I still have time to just think and daydream. It doesn't matter how many shoulders I accidentally hit because I stare blankly at the streets in the campus corridor.

I swear, I feel frustrated, I need a job, Chelsy who never makes up with me and college assignments that are piling up.

A strong enough pull from someone made me flinch, my consciousness seemed to return when I looked up.

I found the figure of Alaska who I believe pulled me because he almost hit the fierce lecturer, he slightly bowed politely to the lecturer and apologized for my mistake. He really cares about me.

"I told you never to daydream while walking," his cold, slightly firm voice didn't take my attention away from his black pupils in the slightest. I smiled a little at him, I wanted to touch this untouchable man, I wanted to touch his cheek just a little.

"Senior—I'm tired, I—" I feel like my sanity is almost gone, especially when my ears are ringing and my head is spinning fast. I touched his cheek, rubbed it a little there because I thought I was going to sleep.

My eyes glaze over, my body feels weak.

"You are okay?" The look on his face that was a little worried and the tone of his voice I couldn't catch clearly.

"Senior—I love you," I guess those were my last words before my body crashed into his chest and my vision darkened.

-

I don't know what happened after that, but I felt my body lying on the bed. A little legal because I think I've been lying in bed for hours.

My eyes slowly opened, this strange room filled with the smell of medicine made me feel dizzy again. Let me guess, the man immediately took me to the hospital not far from campus.

"Senior Alaska," I suddenly called his name, even though I hadn't used my eyes to search the room.

"I'm here," he said, I quickly turned to the side where Alaska sat alone not far from me.

"You didn't tell my mother, did you?" The question that suddenly stopped in my head, I saw him let out a small breath then pulled his chair to be a little closer to me.

"How long did you spend staying up late?"

Shit, come on, I'm not in the mood to be interrogated. I know, I suddenly fainted because of that, I also rarely fill my stomach properly, sometimes I only eat once a day, rarely drink water. It was all because I was too ambitious to complete the assignments from the lecturer.

"I don't stay up late if I don't have work, I'm serious." I didn't dare look into his eyes that seemed to be staring at me coldly, when he usually was like that.

"What the doctor said doesn't match what you said." For a moment I looked at him, he was still looking at me the same as before, I think the situation is serious right now.

"Forget it, sometimes doctors always exaggerate," I said again, I think I can always answer what he said if he interrogated me.

"Your stomach could just get worse if you let it, you know?"

"I know, I can handle it, no need to worry."

I heard a sigh from him again, he chose to reach for a box of food that I don't know since when was there.

"I've heard a lot of losing cases lately with gastric disease, and you've managed to unsettle me."

Wait, what?!