Chapter 15: Everything hurts
"Jungkook-ah!" Yoongi called for jungkook to come to the kitchen and eat, Jungkook soon came in with a bottle of banana milk in his left hand and his phone in his right. Jungkook lifted the bottle of banana milk and puckered his lips to rap them around the white straw in the bottle and take a sip. "Put your phone down, Googie." Yoongi ordered a bit annoyed that the younger hasn't taken his eyes off his phone for almost two hours now. He then put his phone on the countertop screen facing downward and sat on one of the chairs. "What are you even doing on it?" Yoongi asked putting a bowl of tomato soup in front of him, Yoongi felt a bit insecure about Jungkook putting the phone so he couldn't see the screen.
"Hoseok and Jin hyung was trying to play Minecraft together, they arent very good at it, hahahahaha." Jungkook replied and picked up his phone again to prove he's wasn't lying, he typed in "0309" as the pin to unlock his phone. Yoongi started blushing immediately, he never thought Jungkook would make his phone password Yoongis birthday. "You've been watching this for two hours straight?" Yoongi asked after looking at the phone then Jungkook put it down again. Screen still facing downward. "Babe, I don't do anything straight," Jungkook wiggled his eyebrows and curled his lips into the single most adorable baby bunny smile that Yoongi completely ignored along with Jungkook's very gay remark. "No, before that I was texting with Jiminie and Taetaebae." Jungkook replied and yoongi started to feel a bit guilty, he didn't want to be the nosy and controlling boyfriend. However, Jungkook found the way Yoongi got jealous and insecure adorable.
"Well eat up so you can get better." Yoongi said then pecked Jungkook on the forehead.
Jungkook had a fever, he caught it from a kid at his university and had to stay home for a few days. He didn't want Yoongi to be there incase he made his boyfriend sick as well, but Yoongi completely refused to leave and wanted to take care of Jungkook until he got better.
→_→←_←(＠_＠;)(─.─||）(^_^メ) •́ ‿ ,•̀ ༎ຶ‿༎ຶ (-̩̩̩-̩̩̩-̩̩̩-̩̩̩-̩̩̩___-̩̩̩-̩̩̩-̩̩̩-̩̩̩-̩̩̩)(〒﹏〒) ಠ,_｣ಠ (ﾉ≧∇≦)ﾉ ﾐ ┻━┻¯\_( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)_/¯⁽⁽ଘ( ˊᵕˋ )ଓ⁾⁾
[In Seokjin's bedroom]
"Sockjinnie oppa? Are you alright?" Soobin asked then lifted his arms to put his shirt back on, Soobin could see Seokjin was a bit uncomfortable getting dressed again after their "intercourse."
"I... and you.... we.... we just.... Aish, I don't know, soobin. I don't know if I'm alright." Seokjin tried to lie but ended up caving at Soobin's eyes that he could feel was staring at him. "I'll say it like this then; did you like any of what just happened? Do you want to do it again?...." Seokjin didn't answer and stared at his wrists that were bruised from the scarf being to tight, ".... Do you... feel disgusted?" Soobin asked and got an answer immediately.
"No! I'd never!..." Seokjin exclaimed, he didn't want Soobin to get the wrong impression. "What do you feel then?" Soobin asked then sat down next to Seokjin on the bed, and continued to stare into Seokjin's gorgeous eyes. From Seokjin's perspective however, he felt like Soobin was staring straight through his soul.
"I feel strange... like I want to scream and run away out of embarrassment and shyness. Like I want to kiss and cuddle with you. Like I want to yell at you and myself for being complete and total idiots. *Sigh* I don't know... I think I'm losing it. I thought I was straight. I don't know what to do, Soobin-ah!" Seokjin explained then exclaimed Soobin's name and attacked Soobin with a very tight hug.
"Would you feel better if we forget this ever happened... or label it as a hook up?" Soobin asked embracing Seokjin's warm body. He didn't want to just "label it as a hook up" or forget about it, but he also didn't want to make Seokjin uncomfortable or upset.
"I told you I don't know... all I know is I want you." Seokjin said but the last few words were muffled in Soobin's clothes and Soobin couldn't make out what they were. He didn't dare to ask either, incase they were something he didn't want to hear.
(╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻(ﾉ≧∇≦)ﾉ ﾐ ┻━┻(ノ｀⌒´)ノ┫:・┻┻(ﾉ°_o)ﾉ⌒┫ ┻ ┣ ┳(ノ｀⌒´)ノ┫:・┻┻(-_- )ﾉ⌒┫ ┻ ┣ ┳(┛❍ᴥ❍)┛彡┻
[In Jimin's and Yoongi's living room in their shared apartment]
"Will you play with me hyung? We haven't played together in so long." Jimin pouted in his usual "You can't say no to me" position. Yoongi was sitting on the couch with his legs spread out just enough for jimin to sit on his knees with his hands on the edge of the couch looking up at Yoongi.
"Ok, but I need a favour you might not be willing to do." Yoongi replied filling Jimin's precious head with confusion. "Want a blowjob or something? You could never ask for anything I wouldn't wanna give to you, silly kitty." Jimin replied giving Yoongi the innocent smile Yoongi was planning on ripping off the younger's face shortly.
"Can you tell me Jungkookies current mental health state?" as expected, Jimin's smile dropped immediately, "It's clear to me he's not ok but he tried so hard to act like he's fine to the point that he'll make me out to be insane and seeing things that aren't real. I just need to know if he's right or not, am I really just imagining my own boyfriends depression?"
"No... you're right. When he's not convinced he's not good enough of a boyfriend to be with you he's convinced you don't like him enough to stay with him. When he doesn't think you hate him he thinks he's ruining your life or chances of ever having a happy family. He's been at it for months too, switching between these stupid reasons to think you shouldnt be with him and then pretending all is fine when other people are around. The only way he'd even tell me, his literal best friend in the entire world, about the demons inside his head is if i ambush and force him to talk when I follow him when he excuses himself to the bathroom so no one would see him cry. It made me feel so useless not being able to help him, but he made me and Tae promise we wouldn't spill so I couldn't even get him someone that would be able to help him. But I'm done watching him suffer like this, so now it's my turn to ask a favour. Please Yoongi hyung, save my soulmate." Jimin explained to Yoongi who listened with endless tears flowing like an ocean of sorrows out of his beautiful dark brawn eyes. He new Jungkook was suffering but he never would have imagined that his boyfriend could ever think such things, knowing why Jungkook suffered so much made Yoongi suffer equally as bad. He blamed himself for not trying harder to make the love of his life understand that he was the love of Yoongi's life in the first place.
"He's been suffering so much because of me." Yoongi let out a few sobs and Jimin immediately got off his knees to hug him, purely from old habits. Jimin knows that Yoongi likes to be held when he's sad. "Blaming yourself wont do anything. This isn't anyone's fault, any of us could have gotten those ideas in our heads. It's not because of you hyung!" Jimin tried to comfort a crying and sobbing Yoongi. Right now, it seemed like everything was falling apart.