12. Nobody's fault

Jojojo, Santa Claus is coming to town, and he brings you a new chapter for this Christmas!

Also, I just published a Christmas One-Shot in spanish, but I don't think I'll be able to finish translating it tonight, and since tomorrow's Christmas Eve and all, I'll probably have finished in english between Christmas and New Year.

I just want to say something before we start, and I'll make it quick, since the chapter is already pretty long.

It's about last chapter. There were some reviews about Luan and the backstory I gave her in this story. Like I said a few times before, that's my headcanon for her, and you can of course have another idea of her, about her friends and social life. We all have different interpretations of the characters (specially when we don't have that much background info on them), and I think it's totally okay if you don't share my same views and you have totally different opinions. And when she told Lincoln that she "Loves him more" than the rest of his sisters… Well, I don't underestimate you guys (although I did left all subtlety with the symbolism about monuments and all that), and I'm pretty sure that you all understand that what a character says it's a consequence of a lot of factors: the context, said character's emotional state, whatever is happening at the time, who said character's talking to… Not everything a character says it's true.

But, if you need a "Word of God" here, then I believe that Lincoln is everyone's favorite brother… since he's their only brother. It's a different kind of attachment than with the rest of their sisters, he's special. I think "One of the Boys" showed us that they all care about him a LOT. That's my opinion.

But anyway, do not take what a character says like it's an absolute truth. For example, in this chapter a character is lying, and if you pay attention, there's something that completely gives it away that he/she is lying. But I won't be telling you "HEY, LOOK, THAT'S A LIE, BECAUSE WHAT HE/SHE SAYS HERE CAN'T BE POSSIBLE SINCE...", no, I'll let you do the detective work. It's pretty evident, though.

Like I always say, thank you all for following this story so far. I'd like to thank Omega Ultra, Veni Vidi Vici 34, CapitalClassShip, Boris Yeltsin, shadowprove97, Zach the Red Raider, Thunderstrike16, littlealexmartinez61910, MikeTheHuman113, celrock, FanficFan920, UnpopularToaster, Codymitchell1, D-Structs, Mew Shadowfang, Darth Atrox, ericaphoenix16, ExMarkSpot, BoukenDutch, venomsdragon14, ElectricLoud, GreatBeast455, ImpossibleJedi4, HtfLover, Dannith, Unknown Russian, Secret life of writing, musicpetal, thehardboiledhit, Shigiya (what song would that be?), Hatoralo, Jazz, Samtastic 3,0, Purple, Hex, Grim-XII, Jack of harts, Demonsrun11, Chuglife and those anonymous guests!

Man, judging by your reviews, a lot of tears were shed last chapter!

So here we go! All aboard the feels train!

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Chapter 12:Nobody's fault.

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"Son."

Lincoln grunted something incomprehensible and snuggled a little closer to that comfortable pillow that enveloped him. He was feeling warm, protected, safe. He was lost in an ocean of pleasurable sensations, increased by the beautiful nebula of sleeping.

"Lincoln, wake up."

When a hand started to shake his shoulder, Lincoln finally opened his eyes.

The first thing he noticed was that his father was trying to wake him up. He immediately recognized that he wasn't in his room too, but in the living room couch. And the third thing he noticed was that it wasn't a pillow what was enveloping him. It was Luan. Last night memories came back at him, and he unconsciously snuggled against her again. After that intense chat, Luan had asked him to sleep with her there in the couch. He remembered that he had lain with his back pressed against his sister, and that she had held his hand. During the night, though, Luan had wrapped her arms over his chest, hugging him like she was trying to avoid someone to take him away from her.

Which was, in fact, the case.

"Lincoln, can you hear me?" Whispered his dad.

Lincoln rubbed the back of his hand over his eyes, and let out a big yawn. When he finally regained the use of his throat, he answered.

"What time is it?" He asked his father.

"It's twenty past six. Lincoln, is everything okay?"

"What do… What do you mean?" He asked, yawning again. His father was trying to start a conversation, but Lincoln's body was asking him to go to sleep as soon as possible. He had had the best sleep he could remember, and he needed to keep resting.

"Did something happened last night? Why are you and Luan sleeping here?"

Still dazed by his sleep, he understood his father's concern.

"I woke up and went… to the bathroom. And Luan was here."

"What time was that?"

"I don't know… Midnight? One in the morning?"

"And what was she…?"

"She's fine" he interrupted him, closing his eyes and putting his hand over Luan's arm. "She was just… confused."

His father didn't say anything for a couple of seconds, and he took that silence as an invitation to keep on sleeping. He was just about to surrender to Morpheus's call when his father started to shake his shoulders again, bringing him back to the boring world of reality.

"Lincoln, it's Friday, Luan has to go to school."

"She doesn't want to go" he mumbled.

"She has to" said his father, as he delicately moved Luan's arms away from their grip on her little brother.

She complained in her sleep, and her arms tried to grab him again, but Lynn Sr carried Lincoln in his arms.

"What…?" Asked Lincoln, opening his eyes again.

"Shhh… I'll carry you to your room" he said, moving to the stairs.

Too tired to complain, he just managed to take one last look at Luan. She was still sleeping, but her left hand was slowly moving over the now empty space on the couch, looking for something that was no longer there.

While they were going up the stairs, Lincoln closed his eyes and let his father carry him. Confused, in a weird state between sleep and vigil, he started to remember images from his childhood, memories of him falling asleep anywhere on the house and his father carrying him to his bed. Sometimes he would pretend to be asleep just to be carried. His dreams and reality started to blend with each other, and he couldn't tell which was which. One moment, he was just a kid and his father was putting Bun-Bun on his chest to protect him from nightmares, and suddenly his father, with considerably less hair, was tucking him in, covering him with his blankets and kissing him in the forehead, as Lincoln felt some salty drops of water falling on his face. Which was weird, since it didn't seem like it was raining outside.

His dizziness didn't last very long. As soon as he closed his eyes he was sleeping again.

When he finally opened his eyes again, his alarm clock said that it was almost ten o clock in the morning. He sat on his bed and started to stretch his arms. He remembered right away where and with whom he had spend the night, and how he had gotten to his bed. A part of him was feeling bad for not having breakfast with his family, but on the other hand, he felt like he had rejuvenated five years in a single night. He hadn't woken up startled in the middle of the night due to a nightmare. In fact, he had had some very warm and pleasant dreams.

He got up with a renewed mood, quickly grabbed a marker and stood in front of his calendar. He crossed out Thursday, the day before, and counted the days again. He still had nine days before his dead line. He checked his bucket list and started to update it. He checked the boxes next to "Speak with Luan" and "Find out what's going on with her", which formed one of his top priority tandems. He also checked both "Fix things with Ronnie Anne" and "Ask mom to help me write a book" objectives. There was a lot to do in very little time, but he had faith. He read the whole list once again and chose a couple of objectives to complete that same day.

He walked out of his room, already dressed and with intentions of going downstairs to have some breakfast, but he was interrupted before he reached the stairs.

"Lincoln" called a voice behind him.

Lisa was coming out of her room, swiftly walking to him.

"Hey, Lisa. Good morning" he greeted her with a smile, remembering how he had tucked her in her bed the previous night.

"Morning. It is necessary that you come with me to my lab so I can run some control tests on your physical, neurological and psychosomatic state, in relation with the progression of cellular deterioration in your cardiac fibers."

"You hurt your what?" He asked, feeling like he was talking to R2-D2 with no one to translate for him.

Lisa sighed and fitted her glasses.

"Come to my room, so I can see how you're doing."

"Oh, sure. Why didn't you say it like that?"

Without answering, Lisa turned on her heels and stepped back into her room. With a slight smile, Lincoln followed her. Lily wasn't in her cradle, so she was probably downstairs, watched by her mother. The room's furniture was covered in book of all sizes and colors about anatomy, sickness and pretty much everything about the human body, and all those medical equipments that Lisa had gotten from God-only-knows where were on and doing digital sounds.

"Take a seat. This should only take a couple of minutes."

A couple of minutes later, Lincoln had gone through three full body scanners and had given a new blood sample for the cause. He didn't complained and did as he was told. He let Lisa do her work and whatever she thought it was necessary to do. While she was busy doing her stuff, he looked around her room. He remembered what he had seen the night before in the computer, and was looking for some jar, test tube or anything new around the room. Where do you keep an enzyme?

"Very well, Lincoln" Lisa finally said, after comparing the different studies, "your body seems to be fighting against the disease, stopping it from accelerating its expansion across your bloodstream."

"Is that good?"

"Of course. That means my initial projections about our available time are so far correct."

He nodded in silence. Those were absolutely good news, it meant that he might live to see the end of his calendar.

"However, these studies shows that you have acquired the flu virus, which is currently in incubation."

"The flu?!" Lincoln said, now totally worried; the last thing he needed was having to spend his last few days being sick like a zombie, not being able to leave his own room. "But how can it be? No one else is sick!"

"Actually, I can take credit for that. You see, I awoke at the wee hours of the morning due to an alteration on my normal sleep cycles, and just for precaution I decided to walk into your room so I could see that it was all in order. I found you placidly sleeping, but I noticed how cold it was in your room, which is logical, considering the fact that the house central heating system does not reach your room. Fearing that the low temperatures might weaken your immune system, I decided to use some of my special Decontamination Spray, patent pending. Evidently, I managed to eliminate the virus before it could travel through the vents and infect the rest of the family, with the exception of yourself. It seems like you were already infected by the time I got there. After that, I went back to my room and resumed my sleeping. But do not fear."

Lisa headed straight to what seemed to be a minibar, typed a code in the keyboard and pressed her right thumb in a scanner to had her fingerprints read. After a few seconds, the door finally opened, letting scape some kind of white fog, like it was containing liquid nitrogen or a little special effects dry ice. Carefully, she extracted a series of test tubes filled with a blue liquid.

"Fortunately, I have a couple of flu antidote samples stored, and I will gladly let you use it."

"Flu antidote?" He asked, starting to think that something was odd. "You have antidote for the flu?"

"That's what I just said."

"But you never had that, didn't you? Like, a month ago we were all with the flu and you gave us water guns filled with chicken soup. You had no antidote."

"Look, if you don't want it, you can go and lock yourself in your own room, waiting to the symptoms to appear" she replied, sounding annoyed.

Lincoln was taken aback. It was very strange for Lisa to be mad or angry, or to show any kind of emotion for that matter. Lisa was usually above such trivial stuff like human emotions.

"Alright, alright, I'll take it."

"Excellent" she said, grabbing the first test tube and emptying it in a glass. "I don't know the endurance of this particular strain of the virus, so I believe it would be convenient that you drink this antidote twice a day, once in the morning and once at night, until we can be sure that you're cured."

"And when will we know that?" He asked, as he grabbed the glass and analyzed its content.

"I'll let you know."

With a distrustful look at Lisa, Lincoln started to drink it. It didn't taste like a medicine. It had an odd taste, sweet, more like a not so tasty and cold honey tea. All in all it was pretty good, and he drank all the liquid. When he was done he left the glass aside and looked at Lisa again. She was holding her notebook with a pen in her right hand, watching him with interest.

"Well? How do you feel?"

"Er… Alright, I guess. You say this will keep me safe from the flu?"

"In theory, yes. But… I need you to notify me about any change you may feel" she said, sounding anxious. "If you find out any negative side effects or if you start feeling… different."

"Different?"

"You know… With more energy, more active, any physical change you may feel."

"Ok."

"Do you understand what I'm saying?" She said, sounding like his mother when she was telling him to take out the garbage for the tenth time. "You must notify me immediately about any kind of change, no matter how small it may be."

"Geez, I get it" he said, surprised by her reaction. "Easy there, Dexter. It's just the flu."

She seemed to be about to retort, but she stopped seconds before the word escaped her mouth.

"You're right. It's just the flu. You can have breakfast. You're dismissed."

And without another word, she turned and went to her computed, doing things Lincoln wasn't even interested in trying to comprehend. He left his little sister's room, highly confused. As he was going down the stairs, he couldn't avoid thinking that there was something about Lisa's story. Somehow, he felt like there was something that didn't make any sense…

When he got to the living room he saw Lily on the ground, playing with a key chain filled with plastic, colorful toy keys. As soon as she saw her older brother, she started to babble and to move her arms.

"Icon!" She gabbled, standing up and trying to walk near him. In her stagger, she tripped with her own foot and fell face first into the carpet floor.

"Lily!"

Lincoln hurried next to his baby sister, who started to cry as soon as her brain registered that she had hit her face. He sat on the floor next to her and lifted her in his arms.

"It's okay, Lily, I got you. It was just a fall. Your big brother is here. It's gonna be okay. Look, here are your keys" he said, grabbing the key chain and shaking it in the air so it sounded like a maraca. "Uuuh, look how many keys you have! And they are so shinny!"

After a few seconds crying, Lily started to laugh, and stretch her hand to grab the keys, but everytime she was about to catch them, Lincoln moved them away from her.

"You'll have to stretch a little more!"

Giggling, the baby stretch her arm once again, and this time Lincoln handed them to her.

"Very good! Well done, Lily!"

In an unusual display of affection from the little girl, she hugged the key chain and laid against Lincoln's chest. He was more than happy to hug her back, and started to gently cradle her in his arms. Barely ten seconds after being crying, she was happy once again. If there was something he loved about his baby sister, besides being able to run around the house practically naked all the time, was her ability to keep things from affecting her much. Her still developing memory made her forget about all her problems.

She… She always forget everything. She would forget everything about her current life when she'd grow up. And that included him…

"Oh, honey, I didn't hear you coming… Lincoln, are you okay?" His mother asked, coming out of her room after hearing Lily crying.

"Yeah, I'm fine… Lily just hit me with her key chain in the eye, no big deal" he lied, wiping his face with his hand.

Sometimes I fear we're having another Lynn when she grows up" joked Rita, getting near her son. "Did you sleep well?"

"Yeah, yeah. I… Dad told you about me sleeping here with…?"

"Luan, yes. Son… I don't know what you told her, but she didn't wear her mime makeup this morning. And she was talking with her sisters and with me, too."

He smiled. He very much doubted that he had eliminated all her insecurities and fears, but it was a great start.

"Do you want me to make you some breakfast?"

"Sure. And then… Could we go on with the…?"

The phone started to ring, interrupting Lincoln.

"Of course, honey" his mother told him, correctly guessing what he was trying to say. "I did the groceries already, so we can write until your sisters come back from school."

His mother went to pick up the phone, while Lincoln kept playing with Lily.

"Loud house" she announced, picking up the phone. "Yes. Oh, good morning Mr. Finnigan."

Lincoln turned to look at the phone. Mr. Finnigan was a corpulent, irish man that was the principal of the Royal Woods Middle and High School. He had met him at some high school events he'd attended to see his sisters. What was he doing calling to his house? Was it something related to him? Had his sister's teachers found out about his condition?

"Yes, she's my daughter."

Lincoln raised an eyebrow. It was something related to one of his sisters? Were they good news or bad news?

"She did WHAT?!" Yelled her mother, clearing any kind of doubts about the nature of that call.

Last Halloween, Lincoln had decided to dress as Ace Savvy. All his sisters warned him about it, telling him that it wasn't prudent. His younger sisters were focusing on the obvious but not less important fact that he was wearing his underwear on the outside. They thought that was degrading and shameful. His older sisters, meanwhile, were tying to explain to him that he was too old for two things. Firstly, he was too old to go trick or treating with Clyde. And secondly, he was too old to be wearing kids costumes. They tried to explain him that, at a certain age, one could no longer go out dressed like Peter Pan or Mickey Mouse. Lori suggested him to dress as a zombie, the last tendency on the social medias. Luna told him to go as Eddie, the mascot of the English band Metal Maiden. Luan suggested a psycho clown, but Lincoln decided to go as Ace Savvy anyway, telling them that everything was going to be alright.

Lynn was pretty sure that her brother would be the laughing stock from some older boys, but deep down —and she would never, ever admit it to anyone— she thought it was kind adorable. Her brother was authentic. He did what he liked to do, and he wasn't afraid to show the world who he really was. Going around the neighbor with his underwear on the outside was a great demonstration of courage, and no one knew courage better than Lynn, she who declined no challenge. And she really respected her brother for sticking with what he wanted to do regardless of what everyone else might thing.

The Loud kids had figured out, with their years of experience, that it was easier to get candy if they divided themselves in small groups rather than going all together. So the older ones would go with the youngsters and took them on different routes. Lori and Leni would go with Lily and Lisa, Luna and Luan with the twins, and the last group usually consisted of Lynn, Lincoln and Lucy. But this year Lincoln wanted to go with Clyde, so his parents decided to go with Lynn and Lucy instead.

The young goth girl was dressed, predictably, as a vampire. Lynn, meanwhile, was wearing her usual baseball uniform, which Leni had slightly modified so she was doing a really good impression of Babe Ruth. She was going with her bat and ball, hitting it every once in a while and running to catch it later. There was one time where she hit the ball with too much strength, and the ball flew straight into the middle of a nearby park.

"Uh oh" she said, seeing what she'd done.

"Lynn Jr!" Her father nagged her.

"Don't worry, I'll get it!" She said, trying to keep them from punishing her, confiscating her bat or her baseball. "You guys go ahead, I'll find you later."

She ran into the park and soon recovered her ball. Before turning back, though, she looked up and saw Lincoln and Clyde walking down the path, looking down.

"What's up, losers?" She told them with a smirk. But her expression quickly turned into worry when she noticed that Lincoln's face was scraped.

"Lincoln! What happened?" She asked, getting near her brother.

"You guys were right" he said in a low voice. "Some guys made fun of me. They laughed at my costume, they pushed me to the ground and stole our candy bags."

"We tried to stop them, but they were really strong!" Added Clyde, dressed as One Eye Jack, Ace Savvy's loyal sidekick.

Lynn gritted her teeth, and the hand holding her bat almost broke it in half.

"Who did this?"

They gave her a description, and Lynn did what any older sister would do: she hunted those two bullies down. No one would touch her brother and go away unpunished. Accompanied by some fearful Lincoln and Clyde, she walked around the neighbor for almost half an hour, until they finally pointed out those who had stolen their candy.

Needless to say, Lynn beat the living hell out of them. Each one of them was at least a foot taller than her, but they didn't even realize what had hit them. By the time they were able to react, they were on their knees, with bruises in muscles they didn't even know they had. Lynn got Lincoln and Clyde's candy back –along with those two bullies personal harvest– and spend the rest of the night with them, escorting them around the neighbor. More than one fella tried to make fun of Lincoln, but the desire to laugh at a young boy wearing his underwear on the outside were quickly dismissed when said kid was walking along a very angry Babe Ruth with a real baseball in her hand.

Lincoln ended up enjoying that Halloween. All thanks to Lynn.

That's how Lynn had always taken care of her little brother. Someone stole his candy bag? Lynn beat them until they would give them back to him. Some bully at school was trying to steal his lunch money? She gave him bruises until he was was volunteering to save Lincoln a place in the cafeteria line for the rest of his life. She had always found the way to protect her brother. There was no situation from where she couldn't punch his way out of it. Nothing that she couldn't solve with some well measured violence.

Except for the fact that she couldn't save his life.

She couldn't help him. She couldn't save him. He was sick, he was dying, and there was nothing she could do about it, nothing she could do for him. She could only sit and wait. Wait for the days to pass, for that terrible moment to arrive, and then her brother, her dear little brother, her only brother in the whole world, would be gone forever. There was no way of expressing how she was feeling. It was like she was loosing the FIFA World Cup Final by seven goals, with three players less, just waiting for the referee to end the game and sentence the defeat. But this was much, much worse. The was no overtime, no home or away game to change the result, no time-outs, no next season. There was no rematch. Lincoln would die, and that was the end of it. Game over.

She found herself several times a day wondering if it wasn't all just a dream. And that was because everything felt so unreal… She had no appetite. She couldn't really sleep. Conversations around her sounded like they were miles away. She was feeling just like when she was in her swimming competitions. When she swan underwater, she could hear the crowd yelling, but it all felt so far away, muffled by the water, with an interference that helped her focus on herself.

But she was having troubles concentrating on anything. She already wasn't an exemplary student, but this last week she had done absolutely nothing in school. She didn't take any notes, she didn't do her homework, she hadn't listen a single word from her teachers. She was smart enough to keep her eyes on the blackboard and pretend some amount of interest on the daily lessons, but the words were going through her. It was like in the hockey regional final against the Hamilton Harpies, that had been played in the middle of a storm. The sky was falling, and there was so much water that their clothes were several pounds heavier. But in the middle of the game, Lynn didn't ever fell it. She knew that it was raining, but her brain had decided to ignore the impact of the drops and the cold of the water. She knew it was happening, but she didn't feel it. Something like that was going on with her life right then. Days were passing by, she knew that, but it was like time was not really moving.

Her friends and teammates knew that something was troubling her. They had noticed the way she was training those last few days. She was always the best at every sport she practiced, and she usually showed it at every training. But these last few days, it had been different. In soccer practice, she kicked from practically any point in the field, and the ball was hitting the net as fast as a missile. In tennis, all her serves were aces that, had they been recorded by some speedometer like in the Grand Slams, they could probably establish a few records. While in her football practice, she took the ball and started to move like a charging rhino, stomping on any senseless person who would try to stop her. Her karate sensei had even send her to practice alone the day before, after she left a sore white belt on the floor when he couldn't block her.

"You're supposed to control yourself, especially when you're practicing with someone with a lower belt" he told her. "And you need to announce when you're going serious, so the other one can be prepared."

"I'm always serious" she had replied, although accepting her punishment and practicing alone for the rest of the class.

Everyone who knew her knew that she was going through something, but no one gave it much importance. They thought she had finally collapsed against the physical and emotional distress of practicing so many sports in such a professional way. Maybe, had they realized that she wasn't okay, that something was really bothering her, her teachers at P.E. in school wouldn't have sent her to practice with the boys. They would've noticed she needed some less pressure, not to be send with the male group to "show them how it's done".

They were playing soccer, and just fifteen minutes into the game, Lynn had already scored four time. The boys hated when she humiliated them like that. A girl running through them like they were some sort of traffic cones and then scoring some Lionel Messi like goals? They could not allow that. Soon, they started to press her in a rougher way. They started to use their elbows to try to stop her from pressing them, and they threw their legs a little longer than necessary, kicking her ankles. But she didn't complained. She was focused on the game, in being the best, the ball and nothing else.

That's when one of the boys decided to use another tactic. It was a really bad choice,

Lynn was going straight to the rival goal post, with the ball on her feet. She was about to shoot at it when someone kicked her from behind, knocking her over to the ground.

"Foul!" Yelled the teacher, calling a free kick and giving the yellow card to the offender. "And you're lucky it's not red!"

Lynn didn't mind it. She was used to be taking a lot of fouls. She knelt to tie her shoelaces, when the boy that had tried to stop her stood in front of her.

"Sorry, Lynn" he said, sounding pretty amused for someone who was offering an apology, "I didn't see you there."

Lynn stood up and looked right at him, throwing daggers with her eyes.

"Of course you saw me, Ryan. You had a very clear view of my heels when I dribbled around you. For the twelfth time."

"You're right, you completely outran me there. It's just that you're too good for us. Last Sunday, in the park, you humiliated me and my friends."

Lynn was frozen in her place when she started to think about that Sunday, about what had happened that day in the park. With everything that came after that, she had almost forgot about it, but she now remembered that as soon as she got there she had joined a soccer match some boys were playing there. She had gathered around just because it was an opportunity to practice, but then she saw that Ryan was there playing. Apparently, it was one of his friend's birthday. He tried to stop her from joining them, but the rest of the guys who didn't know her thought it'd be fun letting a girl play with them. After she scored five goals, they kicked her out.

That had left her somewhat depressed. She walked straight to a lonely tree to sit down and try to calm down a bit. That's when Lincoln found her, where he offered to play with her…

"Speaking of that, I couldn't ask you, how's your brother?"

Lynn snapped back to reality. Ryan was grinning at her.

"We saw all that fuss you caused. Really, Lynn, you're amazing. I mean, send your brother to the hospital? Your younger brother? I mean, I knew you were competitive, but I never thought you could do something like this over a game. What kind of sister are you, eh? What kind of monster would want to win so bad that she would rather send...?"

It happened so fast that no one could stop her. She jumped over Ryan, knocked him to the ground and hit him in the face. First with her right, then with her left. Over and over. Her sensei was always telling them about selfcontrol, but she'd lost any kind of rationality. The only thing she wanted to do was to shut Ryan up. Not only to erase that stupid smile out of his face, no. It wasn't just against him, for being a jerk. She was punching the words he'd said, the idea behind the provocation.

Maybe, if she hit him hard enough, it would all be a lie. It wouldn't be true that she had sent Lincoln to the hospital, that it was all her fault.

She was out of herself. She felt like her mind was watching a movie where she was punching the boy beneath her. A part of her knew that she shouldn't be doing that, but she couldn't stop herself. The hands that tried to separate her couldn't move her. Only when her teacher grabber her by her arms and dragged her away, Lynn reacted.

"...ABSOLUTELY UNACCEPTABLE!" Was yelling her teacher. "AN UNFIT BEHAVIOR! THIS IS WORTH A SUSPENSION, YOUNG LADY, AND BE SURE THAT I'LL LET THE PRINCIPAL KNOW THAT…!"

The weight of what she had just done started to fall upon her. She looked at her knuckles and found them sore. Her teacher's words were lost in the nebula of the outside world, and Lynn could only think about doing one thing.

Run.

She didn't know what to do. She didn't know where was she heading to, she just let her legs lead the way. Dressed with her gym clothes, Lynn was strolling through Royal Woods streets, keeping both eyes open and looking behind her every few steps, waiting for her principal, her teacher or even police to appear suddenly. She had attacked a classmate and then she ran away. She ran away from school, and no one could stop her. She was so expelled, she was sure about that. There was no running away from that. Her parents would have to find a new school for her. Or maybe they would send her to a boarding school? What if she ended up in jail? Could she be charged for her rampage on Ryan? She was a third dan black belt in karate, she was supposed to have a responsibility on the use of her own strength. Would this put her in trouble?

She wasn't sure, but ultimately she didn't care. Maybe she deserved to be expelled, or sent to jail. She deserved a punishment. If it wasn't because of what had just happened with Ryan, at least someone should punish her for killing her brother.

Ryan didn't know what he was talking about, but he was right nonetheless. She had sent her brother to the hospital. Her parents had explained them older sisters everything. Lincoln had some tumors on his head that, so far, hadn't caused any harm. But the impact of a soccer ball in his head had dislodged some of those cancerous cells, going through his bloodstream right to his heart. Now his heart was infected, it would soon stop working, and her little brother would die because of it. There was nothing they could tell her to make her feel better.

Lori said that it had been an accident. Her parents told her that it was bound to happen sooner or later. So far, Luan had been the only one to openly blame her for all of this, two days ago. And even though that this morning in the family van, after leaving their younger sisters in their elementary school Luan had broken down and cried while telling her she was sorry and asking for her forgiveness, the damage was already done. Lynn now knew that the rest of the family was fully aware that it was all her fault.

She knew they didn't blame her, but what her family thought of her didn't matter. The point was that she would never forgive herself for doing what she had done. She had killed her brother.

Every night, after Lucy fell asleep, Lynn cried herself to sleep. She was feeling guilty beyond measures. There was this time when she missed the final point in a basketball game, and her team had lost the championship because of that. So far, that was her only lost final match, but two years later, she still carried the anguish of having failed that final shot. But that pain couldn't even be compared with what she was feeling knowing she was the cause of her brother's death.

What if Lincoln hadn't offered to play with her that afternoon? What if she hadn't kicked the ball so hard? Why didn't she just sat with him under the shadow of the tree, asking him how was he doing in school, or how things were with Ronnie Anne? Lincoln hated sports. He hated physical effort. If he played with her, it was only to make her happy, to spend some time with her. He'd always been like that. He never complained that she didn't do the things he liked, that she didn't read comics with him, or didn't go hunting ghosts on the attic. He never complained about being her sparring for every single sport she practiced.

While her legs were still leading the way through the city, she remembered a talk she had had with Lincoln some weeks ago, when she told him why she considered him an example of sports.

Lynn had just returned home from the hospital after the last football game of the regular season of the Royal Woods Junior League. She and Lincoln had been fooling everyone for months, with Lynn pretending to be him in his games. In the end, their shenanigan had been discovered when Lynn got injured and had to leave the game, and Lincoln had to take her –well, his place. She had sprained her right ankle, but she decided to see the end of the game before going to the hospital to treat her injury. Lincoln ran with the ball in his hands for a whole minute, dodging the enemy team, although he had scored on the wrong end of the field, and his team had lost the tournament.

As soon as she got back home, Lynn climbed the stairs with her crutch, heading straight to Lincoln's room. She had a few things to say to him.

"Lincoln, it's me, open up" she said, bumping the linen closet door with her crutch.

But Lincoln didn't answered. Annoyed, she opened the door herself and walked inside her brother's room. He was lying on his bed, staring at the roof. He was still wearing his football uniform and his face was covered in mud. He didn't look at her when she entered the room. He gave no signals of acknowledging her presence there. He simply continued to stare at the roof.

"Well? Aren't you gonna say anything to me? Should I punch you so you look at me?" She said, closing the door behind her and walking near his bed.

Seeing that he wasn't answering, Lynn sighed and sat on the edge of the bed. She used her crutch to draw a chair near her and put her plastered foot on it. Only then Lincoln turned to see her.

"How bad is it?" He asked with a low voice.

"It's nothing, just a sprained. Doc says I'll be out for three weeks, but I know a method so I can start practicing in just fifteen days" she said with a mischievous smile.

She waited for him to say something, but Lincoln seemed to be about to cry.

"Alright, whatever you think you have to say, now's the time to say it" she finally told him.

Lincoln sat and hugged Lynn, who was taken aback by his attitude. Confused, she didn't hug him back.

"Er, Lincoln? What gives?"

"I'm sorry, Lynn, I'm really, really, really sorry" he said, hugging her tighter. "This is all my fault, if I wasn't such a failure in sports I shouldn't have asked you to play for me, you wouldn't have been injured and you wouldn't be staying out of sports for three weeks. Please forgive me!"

Lynn started to laugh, and Lincoln slowly separated himself from her. He looked dumbfounded as Lynn kept laughing.

"What are you laughing at?" He finally asked.

"I'm laughing at you, you doofus!" She said with a big smile. "Lincoln, you no need to apologize for anything."

"But… But you got hurt."

"Pff, a lesion in a sport, big deal" she said, shrugging it off like it was nothing. "The risk is part of the game. I'm used to this kind of injuries, anyway. Besides, I'm really proud of you, bro!"

And she violently wrapped her right arm around Lincoln's neck, in a gesture that most people would consider a lucha libre grab, but that Lincoln knew for a fact that it was one of the ways Lynn showed some caring.

"Proud? What are you talking about?"

"Lincoln, you went to the field for the last minute in the final match of the season! Do you have any idea how brave that was?"

"But I made the team lose the tournament."

"But before that you ran over sixty yards with the ball, dodging everyone! And you got to the end zone!"

"I went to the wrong end zone" he remarked, believing that Lynn had lost her mind.

"But that's just because you don't know the rules. I've never seen a beginner run like that. I didn't know you had that much energy! I'm impressed!"

"Lynn, I think you're not getting it: I'm the worst player of the season, and I only played for a minute!"

"No, you're the one who's not getting it" she said, releasing Lincoln from her grab/hub so she could look him in the eye. "You're comparing yourself with boys that train the whole year to understand and be better at the game. You haven't trained in your life, so what you did is much, much more valuable."

"I don't understand what you..."

"Let me finish! Lincoln, sports aren't about making your rival lose, it's not about being better than everyone else. Sports are about overcome yourself. I'm not training to be better than my rivals; let them worry about their level. I train to be better, to be the best version of myself. You hate sports, but today, when the team needed a player, you didn't hesitate to take that place, and you gave your best. You know, there's one thing we players always say about penalties in soccer: they are only missed by those who dare kick them. There's always the change of failing, but it takes a lot of courage to take the risk. And you, little brother, you just took a great risk. The rest of the school will probably hate you for giving away the trophy, but today you became my hero, Linc."

Her words meant a lot to Lincoln. His eyes started to glow, and his mouth slowly became a smile.

"Can I hug you again?" He asked.

Lynn gave a look at the door.

"Fine. But if someone comes in, I'll throw you to the floor and say we were wrestling."

And then, smiling too, she opened her arms and hugged her little brother tight.

Lincoln hated sports and he thought of himself as a lazy boy who could never be good at them. Still, he never rejected an invitation from Lynn to play with her. And Lynn admired and loved him because of that. He didn't know it, but he had an enormous potential to be an excellent player if he ever decided to train and take it seriously. Of course, they would never know now, since Lincoln wouldn't be able to practice anything anymore.

When she walked past the auxiliary gym, Lynn finally realized where had her feet lead her to. She strolled through the parking slot and entered the access hall of the Royal Woods Athletic Club. She knew that building like the back of her hand. Her parents had made her a club member when she was a little girl, and she had signed up in all the sports. At her thirteen years, she had practiced at least once every one of the seventeen disciplines the club offered. She was known by everyone there, and the staff almost considered her as part of the family.

The club was pretty big, and there were a lot of places she could head to, but she knew why her unconscious had taken there, and she knew what she needed first. She climbed the stairs, passed in front of the trophy cases (where her name appeared countless times) and went straight to the service room. She knocked the door and waited. A few moments later, an old man, about sixty-something years old opened the door. His white hair outlined a small and kind face, with some wrinkles around his eyes and on his neck. The man was wearing some big glasses that increased the size of his eyes, making him look like giant mantis. He was dressed as a janitor, but everyone in the club knew that man was more than an ordinary employee.

"Well, look who's here! It's the Little Loud!" Said the man, extending a trembling and wrinkled hand toward Lynn.

"Good morning, Phillip" she said, shaking the old man's hand.

Phillip had been working on the club for over forty years, and even though her official job was Cleaning and Maintenance Manager, those who lived the daily life of the club knew that he was the heart of the institution, a man who knew everything there was to know about the sport history of Royal Woods, and he had the incredible ability of remembering every athlete that trained in the club. He had access to all the areas, and if someone needed something, they could always count on Phillip.

"What are you doing here on a Friday, Lynn Jr.?" He asked with a warm smile.

"I came to see sensei Royce."

"Oh, Mr. Royce, of course. But you don't have karate practice today" said Phillip, taking a hand to his chin. "I believe your category has practice on Tuesdays and Thursdays evenings, not Friday mornings."

"I know, but I'm getting ready for the next belt exam, and sensei agreed to give me extra classes" she lied, feeling terrible for being lying to Phillip. She spend a lot of time in the club, and Phillip was practically a friend.

"Oh, that's wonderful" he said. "Always going for more, aren't you Lynn?"

"Yeah… that's me. So, listen, here's the thing: my mom took my karate gi to laundry last night, and I don't have anything to practice with" she said.

"Say no more" answered Phillip, grabbing his keys and closing the door behind him. "I have a perfect uniform for you in the props room. Come with me, it's just around the corner."

When she entered the dojo, she found it was almost empty. The first class of the day, for adults, would start an hour later. The only one there was sensei Royce himself. He was a pretty short man, about the same height as Lori, and his brown, neatly combed hair made him look like a librarian rather than a master of karate. But behind that friendly look was a retired five-times national champion of martial arts, who had settled down in Royal Woods after finishing his career as a professional fighter and was now preparing the next generation of athletes.

He was wearing his karate gi already and his eight dan red and white belt, and was currently sweeping the floor with a broom as he sang an old and catchy pop song.

"Everybody was kung fu fighting… Those kicks were fast as lighting" he hummed as he danced around the dojo with the broom in his hands.

"Sensei?" Called Lynn, approaching him already wearing her karate gi.

Sensei Royce stopped dead on his tracks and turned to look at his student.

"Lynn? What are you doing here?" He asked, leaving his broom aside and walking near her with a confused look.

"Sensei" she said, taking a big bow, "please, I'd like to practice real combat with you."

"What?"

Mr Royce was an excellent fighter. Even if he was over fifty years old now, his physical state was still enviable, and what he'd lost in endurance he'd won in experience and technique. However, even though he participated in some seminars every now and then, he always refused to practice combat with a student. He limited himself to give instructions and advice from the distance.

"Please" she repeated, bowing even more, like she was trying to kiss her exposed toes, "fight with me."

"Lynn, you very well know I don't do that."

"Sensei, I beg you. I need… I need to fight" she confessed, her eyes fixed on the floorboards.

She didn't saw her sense's face. She just heard his silence.

"I don't do combat with my students" he seriously said. "And even I did, this is not your practice schedule. In fact, you should be in school right now. What are you doing here?"

"School doesn't matter" she said, clenching her fists and sounding annoyed. "Please, I'm asking you to make an exception."

"No. Call your parents and tell them to pick you up. You'll be in serious trouble if they don't know you're here."

Lynn felt her eyes burning. Her body had brought her here because she needed someone to fight with, someone who could keep up a fight with her. Since Monday, she'd found out that punching things helped her feel a little better with herself. It was like every punch made her drop a small amount of the frustration she was carrying on her shoulders. But, honestly, what helped her most was the pain. Those first few days, a couple of hours with her punching bag left her hands numb and sore, and her knuckles a little swollen from all those impacts. She then started to practice with her makiwara, until she eventually twisted her wrist. And the day before, when she had fought with Ronnie Anne… She had deliberately provoked that fight, she was needing it. She needed to fight with someone. She didn't want to hurt her, really, that's why she held back most of her blows. And she wasn't really worried about keeping her guard up; she could've avoided receiving a couple of blows, but physical pain was starting to work, ironically, as a painkiller.

She knew some facts about the human body, since it was what she trained all day long. She knew that when the body detected several injuries, it put the focus on the most important, the most dangerous. It was a defense mechanism that made the body to put more focus on those lesions that could, potentially, put life in risk. That way, for example, if one had a broken bone, that pain would nullify the pain from less important injuries, like a small cut.

Lynn wasn't as smart as Lisa, but she had the theory that her exhaustion and small doses of pain she suffered as a result of her extreme and furious training were helping her ignore the tremendous anguish her heart felt. She knew that it was a bad thing to do, that it was wrong, that it was a self destructive attitude that could only end up bad for her. But her mind wasn't thinking in the long term. She needed some kind of relief, and she needed it now.

Enraged, she prepared her legs and quickly moved near her sensei. He was shocked to see Lynn throw a circle kick aimed at his chest. He was paralyzed for some instants, but in a fraction of a second he adopted a defensive form and deflected Lynn's kick with a swift and precise movement of his wrist.

"Lynn! What are you doing?! That kick could've hurt me hadn't I block it!"

"I knew you would block it!" She said, giving her sensei with a challenging look. "I couldn't touch you if you didn't let me!"

"Lynn, stop this madness and go home! I won't fight you!" He said, standing normally, although his shoulders seemed to be tense, ready to react.

"Yes you will!"

And Lynn attacked again. She started to throw him punches, kicks, she tried to apply the grapples he had taught her all these years. She did every single combination she knew from the katas, trying her best to hit her sensei. She was his best student, but the reflexes and strength of the ex champion, while not as good as they were, were still enough to keep her in place.

"Enough!" He finally said, grabbing her by the wrist and hitting her in the chest with his open palm, making her back down a few steps. "You have just lost your black belt until you learn respect and self-control!"

"I don't care about the belt!" She yelled, feeling a little pain in the sternum. "I just want you to attack me!"

She resumed her assault on her sensei, who continued to block her blows and kicks. She was too lost in her anger to realize it, but she had started to cry. She was trying to keep her mind blank, but there was something she couldn't avoid thinking. During all those years competing in karate tournaments, she had used a very particular way to psych herself up to defeat her opponents: she always pictured whoever she had in front of her like they were hurting Lincoln. She told herself again and again that they had hurt him. And when she fought them, her older sister instinct made her a most dangerous rival. However, this time, as she tried to hit her sensei, she was picturing herself in him. She was trying to make herself pay for having hurt Lincoln. She was so conflicted inside that she started to cry without noticing it.

Mr Royce did noticed, though. He knew something was wrong the moment his student tried to attack him just because she wanted a fight. That was not the Lynn he'd taught all these years, the girl he was so proud of. Those tears only confirmed him that there was indeed something wrong.

Lynn threw a new fist aimed at his chest, knowing that he would block it. But when he put his arms down, leaving his chest exposed, she barely had time to stop her fist millimeters before hitting him.

"What are you doing?" She said with trembling voice. "Defend yourself!"

He said nothing. He stood straight in his place, with his right palm covering his left knuckles. That was a karate posture used at the beginning and end of every kata, symbolizing the intention of not fighting.

"I said, defend yourself!" She yelled, punching him in the chest but lacking conviction.

He didn't even flinch. He didn't try to block it and he said nothing after receiving the punch. That made Lynn a lot more angry.

"Fight back!" She said, delivering a new blow, this time a little harder.

Again, no answer.

Feeling even worse by this, Lynn started to punch his sensei on his chest, telling him again and again to defend himself, pleading him to attack her. The strength on her blows was carefully measured. She was hitting him, yes, but she wasn't causing him any real pain. She wouldn't even bruise him. For a couple of minutes, she just used him as a makiwara, letting go all her frustration, and the more she did that, the more she cried. She wasn't just shedding some tears, she was sobbing and panting, having real troubles to keep a steady breathing. She finally let her arms fall like dead weights and pressed her forehead against her sensei's chest. Now fully surrendered to her crying, she let him put an arm on her shoulder.

Neither one of them spoke, and save for her sobs, the dojo was fully silent for some minutes.

There was no point in trying to pretend that she was okay, that there was nothing wrong. So after she settled down, they sat on a bench and she told him what was happening. She told him that her brother was really sick and that he would die in just a few days, but she didn't dare to tell him that it had all been her fault. She couldn't do it. It was just too painful to even think about it. He immediately comprehended the gravity of the situation, and he understood why she was acting so different lately. He tried to explain something about that people who die still live in the hearts of those who loved them, but Lynn wasn't looking for wisdom. She didn't need nice words about how she would eventually overcome her brother's loss. When she said nothing, Mr Royce understood what was going through her mind.

"Lynn, I understand that this is tough. I know what you're going through. When I was a kid, I lost my cousin in a car accident. I know the anguish and the jitters you're feeling right now. And I know why you came here."

She looked up at him, wiping her tears on the karate gi Phillip had given her.

"When I was younger, I too believed that karate could help me forget about my problems. Whenever I fought with my parents or I failed at school, I would train obstinately, even to the point of hurting myself" he gave her a significant look, and Lynn wondered if, at some point, karate gave you the ability to read minds. "But, with time, I learned that the beauty of karate resides in separating the mind from the spirit. The catharsis this discipline can give you is not in a way to channel your anger and sadness, but in a way to find your inner peace. You're suffering because you are trying to negate what's happening. You're desperately looking for a way to convince yourself that this is not happening, but you'll only find the peace you're looking for when you accept this situation."

"No! I don't want to accept it! I don't want him to die!" She screamed, covering her face with her hands.

"Of course you don't."

"I can't… I can't be okay with him leaving me! I can't be okay with that!"

"Lynn, I'm not telling you to not be afflicted" he said, stroking her back. "It's natural to be sad about this. It's healthy to feel this way. This is not a situation you can overcome, it's something that you'll learn to live with. And for that you need two things: time, and the support of your love ones."

Lynn was starting to calm down, not because she was feeling better, but because she was running out of energy, even to feel depressed.

"You should better go to the lockers and change yourself. Leave your karate gi there, I'll return it to Phillip later."

"I don't want to go" she said, wiping her face. "I ran away from school, and I'm not ready to see my family yet."

"Well, you better start getting ready, because your family came to see you" he said, pointing out a finger to the dojo entrance.

Lynn looked up and saw, standing next to the door, her brother, Lincoln.

After she got dressed, she left the dojo along with him. At first they didn't exchanged any words other than an awkward "Hi" and him asking her how she was, question she just avoided. They started to walk, left the club, and Lincoln guided her to a nearby square. She followed him without saying anything, knowing that she couldn't ran away from this too. The square was practically desert, but Lincoln still walked all the way to the shadow of a lonely tree, far away from the main path were people were walking by. He sat with his legs crossed, and she with her back against the tree trunk, with her knees covering her chest and her arms wrapped around them.

She was waiting for Lincoln to start to talk, to nag her about running away from school or something like that, but he seemed to be waiting for her. He wasn't saying anything, he just stared at her, with a mixture of sadness and understanding in his gaze. Not standing the silence anymore, Lynn finally broke the ice.

"What are you doing here?" She softly asked.

"We had a call from your school. They told mom you had ran away after having a fight with some classmate. We were worried sick."

"Where's mom?"

"Home. I asked her to let me talk with you one on one."

"Why?"

"Because I'm worried about you" he answered, leaning slightly towards her.

Lynn sighed. That was her little brother. He was dying, and yet he was still worried about her.

"How did you find me?"

"You always come here when you have nowhere else to go. Remember when you hit me in the mouth with your baseball bat?" He said laughing, while pointing at his chipped front tooth. "You ran away from home and we were looking for you for hours in the neighborhood until they called from the club and told us you were on the gym trying to lift too much weight."

Clearly, he'd tried to cheer her up by telling an anecdote he evidently thought it was funny, but the result was quite the opposite.

"You always end up hurt when you play with me, don't you?" She asked, feeling like she was sinking in an endless pit.

"Not always" he slowly answering, measuring his words. "You may be a little rough sometimes, but I know you would never hurt me intentionally. And I know you very well, I know that deep down, reaaaaally deep down, behind a locked door with chains and padlocks… you care about me."

"Of course I care about you! I love you, you idiot!" She snapped back, raising her volume.

"I know, I know, I was kidding" he eased her. "What I mean is that you care about me, so I'm not afraid that you might hurt me when we play. You would never do something that could really hurt me."

"And yet, here we are."

There. She said it. She didn't dare to look at Lincoln, she didn't dare to see his face. She focused on the ground and started to pick up strands of grass. Lincoln stood silent for a few seconds, like what she said was still sinking in.

"What is that supposed to mean?"

"You're a smart bot, you very well know what I meant" she answered, tearing those strands apart like each one of them had made a personal offense to her.

"If… If you're saying what I think you're saying..."

"Cut the crap, Lincoln!" She said, hitting the ground with her fist.

He looked at her, startled.

"I swear I just don't get it" said Lynn, taking her hands to her head and messing up her hair. "You're… You're acting like everything's normal. You cook out breakfasts, you keep taking out the trash, you play with Lana, Lola and Lucy… Why the hell are you acting like that? Why are you acting like nothing's wrong? Why the hell do you worry about how I am when it's you who's dying?!"

"Because I love you and I worry about you" he resolutely answered.

"Well, you shouldn't!" She yelled at him, kneeling before him and grabbing him by his shoulders. "I'm the older sister, I should be taking care you! Not the other way around! It's my job to protect you and make sure nothing happens to you! You shouldn't have to worry about how I'm going! I don't deserve it!"

"Of course you deserve so! You're my sister!"

"I've killed you!" She screamed, shaking him by his shoulders, trying to make him understand. "I've killed you!"

Lincoln was trying to keep himself in place, but Lynn had a tight grip on his shoulders, and she was shaking him a lot. Besides, it wasn't normal for him to see his older sister crying, and he was taken aback by that.

"You don't have to worry about me, you don't have to love me anymore! Hate me, be mad at me! Stay away from me, tell me it's all my fault!" She was saying, panting like she had just ran a marathon. "Don't treat me like it's all good, because you know damn well that it isn't, goddammit!"

She slowly pushed him back and stood up. She took two steps near the tree and punched the trunk with all her strength. Her whole arm vibrated after the impact, and her knuckles felt every irregularity in the bark. She didn't cut herself, but her hand was soon turning red. She heard him standing up. She knew him very well, he was unbearably naive. He would now tell her that it had been an accident, that he didn't hate her not blame her, that he still loved her and he would do it forever. That's how he was. He might rile them almost everyday, and every once in a while he messed up bad and they all hate him for a while. But in the end, he was always worrying about his sisters.

"You didn't kill me" said Lincoln, standing behind her.

Absolutely predictable.

"Lincoln, you can say whatever you want, that it wasn't my fault, that it was an accident, but we both know what happened."

"No. I know exactly what happened, and I think you only one one part of it."

"Stop lying! That ball I kicked ended up screwing your heart up, what part of that don't you understand?!"

"Just shut up and listen to me!" He fiercely said, grabbing Lynn by her right shoulder and making her turn around to see him.

She stared at Lincoln with her mouth opened. He looked tired and angry. She was about to say things to him that would serve her a year grounded if her mother listened them, but she shut her mouth and looked down. She took a step back and rested her back against the tree. Realizing she was allowing him to talk, Lincoln sighed and started to explain.

"Do you remember how I was before that ball hit me in the head?"

Lynn closed her eyes and felt a small needle piercing her heart as she started to think about the incident.

"I don't know, bro, I don't know. I just remember you lying on he floor, passed out" she answered, wiping her face with the back of her hand.

"I had been feeling odd for a couple of days, with some headache and not being able to sleep well. And when we started to play, I quickly felt completely agitated" he told her, remembering all those horrible sensations he had experienced. "And my body suddenly stopped doing what I wanted to do. It was like I couldn't control myself."

"Why are you telling me all this?"

"Because I was supposed to die right then."

Lynn gasped and looked up. She looked him in the eye and realized he was being serious.

"What do you mean?"

"There was a tumor blocking one of my brain veins. I was about to die. I should have died right then."

"But… Why…? How…?"

"The ambulance wouldn't have arrived in time" he continued, seeing his sister's loss of words, and stepped nearer her, grabbing one of her hands, "but I was lucky enough to receive a bump on my head that dislodged the tumor."

This time Lynn could only open her mouth, with all possible sounds trapped in the lump in her throat.

"My doctor explained it to me. I was supposed to die that afternoon, but you… Accidentally, yes, but you saved my life."

Lynn's mind was working too slow. Sometimes, emotional shocks made it impossible for the mind to establish simple connections, it doesn't let it realize a correct analysis of the ideas and the presented evidences. All this time, she had convinced herself that she had accidentally caused her brother's death, and now he was telling her that she had in fact saved him. Her mind was unable to comprehend what that meant.

"I..." she said, with her gaze lost.

"You saved me" he repeated, squeezing her hand a little.

That gesture seemed to bring Lynn back to reality, and she immediately jumped away from Lincoln and started to back away from him.

"No… No! I know what you're doing!" She said, pointing a finger at him. "I know you, Lincoln! You're making this up so I would feel better!"

"What? No! Lynn, it's true."

"So typical of you! You'd say whatever to try to cheer me up!"

She was still walking backwards, and then she tripped with one of the tree roots. She fell on the ground and stayed there, hiding her face behind her hands. Lincoln bent over her.

"Lynn, look at me."

"No!"

"Look at me."

She needed a minute or two, but Lynn finally looked at her little brother. His face was really close to hers, and he looked extremely worried.

"Lynn, you prevented me from dying."

"No" she said, shaking her head, trying to find some clarity in that unreal situation. "If… Even if what you're saying is true… Your heart is still going to fail because of me."

"That bump send the tumor cells to my heart, that's true" said Lincoln, nodding slowly, and Lynn exploded in a painful wailing after hearing that. "BUT!"

Lincoln put a hand beneath her chin and made her meet his eyes.

"But", he repeated, "you gave me two more weeks to live. See it the way I see it: I was going to die anyway, you can't change that, but thanks to you I have the chance to say goodbye to all of you."

She kept crying, without looking away from him.

"Tell me… Promise me you're not lying" she asked.

"I promise you."

"Lincoln, I'm serious!" She said, grabbing him by the collar of his shirt. "Don't you dare lie to me with something like this! Tell me the truth!"

"Lynn" he quietly said, "I swear it's all true. I would never lie to you like that."

In any other situation, she might've doubted about his honesty a little more. She would be convinced that he was just telling her what she wanted to hear. He knew how to honeypot someone, he was very skilled with words, and he knew what to say to convince everyone else, or to make them feel better. Maybe she would've normally believed that he was lying, but right now she wanted to believe him… She needed to believe him.

It was like someone had lifted a titanic weight out of her shoulders. She sighed, and along with the air on her lungs, she also felt a gigantic ball of nerves escaping her, like someone had freed her from a straitjacket. She felt that she could now breath normally, that her heart was beating a little easier now. And she hated herself for feeling a little dose of relief, because her little brother was still going to die, but she couldn't help herself from thinking that things were a tiny little better than they had been five minutes ago. She hadn't killed her brother. It wasn't her fault.

She was still grabbing him by his shirt's collar. When she realized that, she released him and softly fixed his shirt, trying to take away those wrinkles. Then her eyes focused again on her brother's face. She stared at his freckles, something only the two of them and Luna shared. She stared at his teeth, the one she'd chipped a long time ago. And finally, she stared at his eyes. They were tired, a little scared, but intense, focused on her, letting her know that he was there for her.

Lynn had never been the most caring of her sisters. Leni, Luan and Luna had always been the ones that consented Lincoln the most. Specially when they were all younger, they tended to hug him more, to kiss him more than her. Lynn, even if she did loved her brother like the rest, had always been a little more reluctant to those things. But kneeling before him in that park, knowing that it would be one of the last times she could stare at that face, she didn't hesitated. She grabbed him by his cheeks, kissed his forehead and then she hugged him. It wasn't a gripping, it wasn't a grab, it wasn't violent. It was a hug that came from her soul.

By the time they broke their hug, school must've been over, since they saw a lot of boys with their school bags walking through the park.

"We can't stay here forever" said Lincoln, who actually felt like he could keep hugging his sister for a much longer time than he was willing to admit.

"Why not?"

"Well… Mom's surely worried about us."

"I'll call her. I'll tell her that I'm with you, and that she can ground me when we're back. She can lock me in my room for a month, I don't care."

"And what do you want to do then?" He asked, with a faint smile.

"To be with you" Lynn said, staring at him. "I've got money. Do you want to have lunch? Do you want to go to…? I don't know, the comic book's store? The arcades?"

"You don't know how to play video games" he commented, raising an eyebrow.

"But… You… You could… teach me?" She shyly asked, taking advantage of the fact that she was wiping her tears with her sleeve to hide her face.

Lincoln smiled, and Lynn knew that any punishment would be worth it just for having the opportunity of seeing her brother smile like that.

"Let's go" he said, standing up and extending a hand to help her. "There's this new Deluxe Combo at Burpin' Burger I'd like to try. And I have a lot to teach you about video games."

She smiled too. She took Lincoln's hand to help her stand up, and she didn't let it go until the cashier gave them their two Deluxe Combos.

.

.

Lol, I didn't even re-read this. It was too long, so probably full of mistakes. But there's something else I've been having trouble with, besides grammar and typos, and you may be noticing it. There are a lot of tears in this story. I mean, I'm running out of ways to describe characters crying, hugging each other and just silently staring at something. But I feel like I can't just not write how utterly devastated Lynn is about her little brother dying without crying. It's just logical for them all to cry. Still, they all have their unique character arc, so I don't think it's a problem yet that they're all crying and feeling devastated (which is natural). I mean, Luan was her insecurities and the sensation that there's no point in laughing in a world without Lincoln, and Lynn was carrying such a tremendous guilt on her shoulders that made her look for a fight anyway, needing to beat and be beated to carry that weight better. I hope you understand that I just can't ignore the pain and the tears.

Oh, and there's something I forgot to mention in the last chapter. Idk if you watched it, but there's a video on the official TLH Instagram where Lincoln says that Ronnie Anne is not really his girlfriend, at least not officially. That for now they're just friends. This broke mayheam in the fandom, but I got kinda happy, because that video proved my theory right about Lincoln and Ronnie Anne liking each other but not being an item yet.

I thought this chapter was going to be a lot shorter, so I'm probably not being cautious when I say that next chapter will probably be shorter. But anyhow, next chapter will be the first part of one of the sister's arc, so it'll probably be shorter... I hope.

Oh, and, thank God Lincoln won't be having the flu! Lisa's a really good sister, right?

So, have a Merry Christmas and a happy New Year, I'll see you on 2017 with Chapter 13 of Requiem for a Loud: "Unplugged"! See ya!