18. Shared emotions

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Good night, everybody! Sorry for publishing one day after the Spanish version and not on a Friday. This translation turned out to be more difficult than usual.

I want to thank all your support, especially all the nice words I received not only for my birthday, but also related to the last chapter. As I said, I'm not personally proud of the way it turned out to be, but I was really glad to see that most of you could enjoy it nevertheless. In the future, I will try to edit so I can make it better.

I'd like to say too that I know that some new chapters have intervened with my headcanons (like, in Vantastic Voyage we found out that Lynn Sr's father was a hippie and that Lynn Jr actually has cooking skills, which is a hidden depth to her in my fic). But since this story is being written as the show is airing, this was to be expected. So yeah, this is an AU obviously, so it's no big deal. But I wanted to mention it.

Also, I received some messages about why didn't I post the usual 'special thanks' last chapter. Well, to be honest… I can't do it anymore. When I started, I was having 20-30 reviews each chapter (in this English version, that's it), so I was kinda able to do it. But now… Last chapter had 85 reviews in English and almost 50 in Spanish. I read them all, but the amount of time it would take me to answer every single one of them is an amount of time that I don't have. I do ream them, I really do. And you know that I answer every single PM you guys send me and almost all the questions you ask me in Tumblr (even if I'm not posting much there lately).

Ok, one last announce: Requiem for a Loud is now being translating to Korean. You can find the link in Requiem's TV Tropes page. Or PM if you want. I'm not the one translating it, but the writer asked my permission and I was more than happy to give him the green light. It makes me happy, ha.

Alright, so thank you all, my wonderful and faithful readers. Without you, I would be just a sad, pathetic writer, but thanks to you I am now a sad and pathetic writer with a story that has over 800 reviews, almost 400 favs and followers and over 180K views! Thank you all!

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Chapter 18: Shared emotions

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Agnes Johnson was almost late to his morning class that Monday. Her alarm clock woke her up just like it always did, and the traffic wasn't worse than usual. Her delay was simply due to the long minutes she spent sitting inside her car in the teacher's parking lot, just outside Royal Woods Elementary School. She sat there with her hands on the steering wheel and her gaze lost somewhere on the windshield not really focusing on anything in particular, with the radio off and the windows closed.

She only reacted when she heard the school bell, which she could recognize even over all the noise from the street and the inherent chaos of any place that congregated over four hundred kids aged from three to thirteen years old. It was knowing that she had to go to work what finally made her react. The need to hold on to her profession, her vocation, was what gave her the strength to get out of her car and go to her classroom, where almost all her students awaited her.

Almost.

Agnes had known since she was a kid that she wanted to be a teacher. Ever since she was young she enjoyed helping her little sister with her homework, and she had always been an exemplary student in her school. Her friends were always asking for help, and she gladly shared her work so they could "adapt it" —and to think that their students believed she didn't realize when they copied each other—, and she had no problems in hanging out with them after school to explain to them what they hadn't understood.

She had always had a teacher vocation, and when she got into college, she decided that she would be teaching in elementary schools. Her passion for history would have actually made her a better candidate for something like a high school teacher —if not college—, but the challenge of teaching kids was much more appealing and interesting for her. She wanted to help them in such an important time of their lives. She still remembered Mrs. Smith, her fourth-grade teacher, and the impact she had had in her life.

She loved working with kids, too. Any kind of tiredness or annoyance she seldom felt was mainly because of the restrictions the current educational system imposed her, or perhaps due to her low salary. But she would never be tired of seeing the smile on an eleven years old kid who had finally understood how to resolve a math problem. The innocence, the happiness, all the little childhood dramas. Working with children was somewhat therapeutic for her.

As she walked the halls and tried her best to avoid bumping into those distracted kids who took their stuff from the lockers at the last second, Agnes raised a hand to touch the small plastic clasp, that orange brooch she had never used before.

She started to think about her students. It was inevitable to end up loving them like they were some kind of family like they were her nieces and nephews. She saw them an average of five hours at day, five days at week, over two semesters. She spent more time with them than she did with her sister or her parents. It was impossible to share all that time, to see them growing up, learning, playing, and then not ending up forming a special connection with them all.

Sometimes she ended up knowing them better than their own parents. Just by seeing how they sat on their chairs, Agnes was capable of knowing if they were having troubles at home or if they had fought with a friend. She knew their fears, what they liked, their strengths, their talents. And even if it seemed impossible because of the giant number of kids she had to teach every year, she could remember almost all of them. She loved it when ex-students saw her out of school and smiled or waved at her, or even walked near to speak with her just for a moment.

She loved all her students. They were family for her.

When she put her hand on her classroom's doorknob, she took a deep breath. She again raised her hand to the orange clasp she had stored inside one of her drawers. She touched it for a second, closed her eyes, had yet another deep breath and entered her classroom, doing her best to try to act calmly.

Her students were definitely acting like they always did. They were talking, half of them were standing and laughing out loud, doing typical eleven years old kid stuff. Most of them had their phones on their hands. When she got inside the classroom, the noise slowly faded away, and they sat in their respective places. Agnes went to her desk and put her purse down. She took out her notebook, her student's records, her pencil case. Then she took her pencils and pens one by one, aligning then carefully on her desk. She took her time to do it. Each movement in slow motion.

Eventually, she ran out of excuses. She looked up and found the worried looks of her students, all immersed in a thick silence. They were waiting for her to greet them like she always did first thing after getting inside the classroom.

"Good, uh, good morning… class" she said, trying to fake some enthusiasm into her voice and miserably failing at it.

"Good morning, Mrs. Johnson" answered back her students, like a choir. They were exchanging some side glances between them.

Agnes quickly inspected the class with her eyes. They all looked a little bit confused by her attitude but seemed to be mostly okay. The only one who looked obviously depressed was Clyde McBride. Agnes felt guilty. She had seen him acting strange for the last week. She had tried to talk with him, but the boy had shielded himself behind "just some stuff outside school, nothing to worry about". She didn't believe him, she was sure that it was something important for him, but she didn't push it. Sometimes students needed time on their own.

Not it was painfully obvious that Clyde's problem was the empty seat behind him, the place Lincoln Loud usually occupied.

Director Huggings had called her on Friday after classes had already ended. The call had taken her by surprise, and her surprise only grew more when he told her that there was terrible news coming from the Middle and High School. A young girl, one of Agnes's ex-students, had sent one of her classmates to the hospital in a rage attack.

And then he told her the reason.

Agnes loved all her students as if they were part of her family. Teachers always have their favorite students, it's impossible to not create empathy with some more than others. As long as that preference didn't affect her impartiality, it wasn't at issue at all. She had some favorite students in the fifth grade, for different reasons. Clyde was one of her favorites for his enthusiasm and how responsible he was with his homework. Jordan was also one of her favorites because she always asked what she didn't understand, unlike most students.

And then there was Lincoln Loud. She had taught his five older sisters, and she had heard a lot about him before actually receiving him in her classroom. He was all that sisters' reports said. An easily impressed boy, with an extraordinary creativity and who was always coming up with the most original and amazing ideas for his projects, even if they seldom turned out the way he wanted them to. Agnes understood him. With so many skilled and talented sisters —the school's trophy case had "Loud" all over it—, the poor kid was in need of some recognition. He wasn't the most clever, nor did he have the best grades, and he certainly had problems paying attention to…

She should've noticed it. She should've known that his lack of attention wasn't normal. She should've sent him to the school psyco pedagogue, he might have realized Lincoln had ADHD. He might have ordered some studies. Maybe… Maybe they might have been able to save him.

"Mrs. Johnson?"

Agnes came out of her thoughts and looked for the student that had called her. Molly had her hand midway on the air.

"Yes, uh, I'm sorry. What is it, Molly?"

"Is… Is everything alright?" She asked.

"Yes, yes, don't worry." She cleared her throat and started to nervously move her papers on her desk, looking for some note about what was she supposed to teach this class. "Alright, class, today, we'll… er… We'll continue with what we learned last week, which is… uh..."

The words died in her throat as she was trying to think. She couldn't focus on today's lesson. She couldn't think about what she should teach them. The only thing that was on her mind was the orange, plastic clasp she was wearing on her head. It was a gift she had received for teacher's day from a very vague student. A student who had remembered at the last second that it was a special day and that he should buy something for his teacher, so he went into the store right next to the school and bought the first thing he had found. She had put it in her drawers along with all the gifts her students had given her throughout the years, but he had never used it. It was too mundane.

Right then, Agnes was convinced that she could never again leave her house without it.

Her plan had been to continue with her class as usual, give them some homework, and use the last part of the day to talk with the children and break the news to them. But her role as an educator was beyond just teaching them what the government said they should be taught. Her moral duty was to prepare them as people, not just to teach them how to repeat what was written in books. She needed to prepare them for life. And in life, sometimes, you needed to take a break.

She had no problem in losing one day to tell them what they needed to know.

"Put your books back in your bags" she suddenly said, sitting on the chair behind her desk. "We won't use them today."

She closed her eyes to massage her temples, but she could still sense her students piercing gaze on her, trying to figure out what was going on.

"Kids… There's something I need to tell you."

The silence was terribly painful.

"The principal… We didn't want to tell you at first, but you deserve to know the truth. Yes. You deserve it."

She heard a gasp and opened up her eyes. The whole class was staring at her, definitely scared, but none of them looked as terrified as Clyde. Agnes looked at the boy in the eyes, and he quickly understood what was going on. To try to calm him or transmit him some easiness was pointless. She just sadly looked at him. And Clyde understood. Agnes saw him wiping his eyes under his glasses, before he laid his head on his desk, with his face covered by his arms.

"As you may have noticed… One of your classmates hasn't been attending school for a whole week now."

They all immediately turned around to look at the empty desk where Lincoln usually sat.

"That's right. Lincoln… he's… he's sick. A-And t-that's why… why he… He's..."

Agnes couldn't contain herself anymore. She started to cry on her desk. Her weeping soon blended with Clyde's, and the rest of the class managed to put two and two together.

"Lincoln?" Said Rusty, worried.

"What is…? Is he… sick?" Asked Whitney in a whisper.

"We saw him on Wednesday," said Liam, shaking his head no. "He was here, just outside the school. He left with Ronnie Anne."

"He looked okay" added Zach.

"Then why isn't he here?"

After Cookie's question, they all turned to see the only one who would have an answer.

"Clyde?" Asked Molly. "Is Lincoln okay?"

He kept crying without looking at him. Without answering.

They were all eleven years old kids, but they were not fools. Seeing both Lincoln's best friend and his teacher crying was enough. They all accused the blow, some faster than others. Many kept silence, trying to convince themselves that they were getting it wrong. Others started to ask questions that neither Clyde nor Mrs. Johnson was in condition to answer. Some others started to cry as well. Eventually, the teacher managed to get a grip and found the strength she needed to tell them everything she knew. There was no homework that day, no boring themes, no useless stuff they had to learn.

It was the worst class of their lives.

Lincoln marked down another day in his calendar after a quick morning shower. Counting the current Monday, there were only six white day-boxes left. The other seven were all colored in red, meaning he couldn't take them for granted. Actually, he couldn't take any day left for granted. The doctors had given him an estimation, he could simply die any second now, without notice. And yet…

He checked himself over in his mirror. He remembered that just a couple of days ago he had looked into the mirror and seen the reflection of a stressed, exhausted kid, a face that had aged years in just a few days. He remembered having woken up several times during each night, suffering from nightmares and sleep terrors. Those first nights after receiving his diagnosis had been terrible. It all had changed, he realized, on Friday's early morning.

He had woke up after a new nightmare and walked downstairs, where he had found Luan. They had had a very deep bonding moment, and then they slept together on the couch, tangled in a tight and loving embrace. Lincoln hadn't woke up again during the night. He slept it through like a baby. The same thing happened the next night, this time with Lynn keeping him company in his own room. Luna and Lori's argument had woke them up and Lincoln was extremely nervous after that, but his sister's words and her hugs had eased him and helped him have yet another peaceful night. Exactly the same happened the next time, this time sleeping with Luna in the tent.

He had had four impossible and awful nights, and then three peaceful and beautiful resting nights. It was clear to him that he owe it to his sisters. Their presence helped him to fall asleep. It was a way of feeling safe, loved, being taken care of. That's why, last night, he had laid down on his bed feeling scared for the night. Lucy hadn't taken the initiative to sleep with him, she had instead gone back to her own room and stayed there with Lynn. They didn't even leave there to have dinner. They managed to keep the thin walls from giving away what was going on in their rooms, but Lincoln didn't need to hear them to know that his two sisters were most probably crying together, surrendering to their pain.

It took him a lot of time to fall asleep. He had the idea of going into Lori's room and ask her if he could bunk with her for the night. Lori wouldn't make fun of him. She would have done it without doubting for a second. Lincoln, however, didn't want to bother her with a request so… childish? Could the need of having someone sleeping with him, comforting him through the night be considered childish, giving the circumstances? Whether it was childish or not, Lincoln didn't dare to bother her. He was too embarrassed to ask her. But the possibility was there, and his mind kept him awake for a long time, debating whether he should go and as Lori or not.

Finally, the fatigue overwhelmed him, and Lincoln had to settle with hugging Bun-Bun until falling asleep. And oddly enough, he had once again slept through the whole night like there was nothing wrong. He woke up feeling full of energy. Even before taking a shower he felt like he was ready to face the upcoming day. He found that extremely odd, considering the previous nights. Even more given that he had experienced an incredible emotional wear telling the truth to Lucy. He should have been exhausted, and yet he felt like new.

He had a theory about it.

He dressed himself up and went out of his room… locking the door behind him this time. The rest of his sisters were either getting ready inside their rooms or already having breakfast. He knocked on the first door to his left.

"Lisa. Are you up?" He asked.

He immediately started to hear a lot of sounds. Heavy objects moving, metallic elements bumping into other surfaces. It sounded like a big mess.

"Lisa?" He asked again, this time trying to open the door.

It was locked down. It didn't move in the least. Lincoln cursed internally at the security measures his sister sometimes took. It wasn't normal for her to do that unless she was doing something absolutely forbidden or it was April's Fools.

"Lisa, open the door now," he said, starting to insistently knock on the door.

"One second!"

Hearing her voice relaxed him a little. His foot started to impatiently tap on the floor, as he waited cross-armed in front of the door. Less than a minute later, Lincoln heard a digital sound, and the door was opened.

"You got up early today" Lisa simply said, gazing at him for a few seconds before turning around and going back to her computer. "Your morning dose is right there, you can take it."

"Alright. Speaking of the antidote, do you think that it may…?"

"Incon! Ugh!"

He swiftly turned to face Lily's cradle. His baby sister was standing up, leaning against her cradle walls, looking pleadingly at him. She looked uncomfortable, her face twisted in a painful grimace, and she wouldn't stop swinging her weight from one foot to the other. She started to call him out and doing noises like she was in pain. Lincoln hurriedly came closer to her.

"What's wrong, Lily? Does it hurt you somewh…?"

He had already identified the problem even before lifting her up. He turned his head around to glare at his other sister.

"Lisa! When was the last time you changed Lily's diaper?" He asked, starting to clear up a desk so he could change Lily there.

"I beg your pardon?" She nonchalantly said.

"You are supposed to take care of her until Mom and Lori are ready!" He reproached her, as he did his best to change his baby sister's diaper. "This looks like you didn't even change her after dinner."

"Now that I think of it, that might be true."

He finished changing Lily and took the opportunity to also dress her up, with her tiny blue pants and her lilac shirt. He knew that she would soon get uncomfortable and would get rid of the clothes, deciding to walk around the house only in her diaper, but he had to give it a shot. Once he was done dressing her up, he lifted his sister in his arms and started to gently swing her back and forth. Her happy giggling filling the room.

"Lisa, I can't believe you left her like that all night long."

"I fail to understand why that would cause you to initiate this little ruckus."

"She's. Your. Sister. Your baby sister" he told her, decidedly vexed. "You can't just forget to take care of her!"

"I did not forget her, Lincoln. I was simply occupied doing other things."

"That's not an excuse! There's nothing more important than taking care of your sister!"

"Of course there is" she firmly snapped back, finally turning around to look at him.

The seriousness in her voice stopped Lily's babbling, making the little girl stare at Lisa, sensing that there was something wrong.

"What do you think is more important for her?" Lisa asked. "One night with a dirty diaper or growing up without her brother?"

Lincoln inhaled deeply, hoping that the air could fill that void in his stomach.

"That dirty diaper didn't cause her any pain, any complication, nor it did anything that could be perceived as harmful or noxious. So, do I regret not changing one diaper? No, Lincoln. Not at all. I think it would be convenient to inform you that I will be busy tonight too, so there's a fairly high chance that this situation will be repeated. Because I have my priorities clear."

Lincoln gazed at his sister. She was looking intensively at him, with seriousness but also with her features visibly tense. Like she was doing an effort to keep his face in a neutral expression. He was not amused at all by the fact that Lisa had ignored Lily's needs. She couldn't be that much into her investigation to stop paying attention to her baby little sister. But… Lincoln couldn't stay mad at her. She was a four years old genius trying her best to save her brother. If anything, he was just more worried about her.

He knelt before her.

"Lisa… You don't have to do this" he anxiously told her. "You don't need to feel like it's your responsibility to—"

"Stop" she interrupted him.

"Lisa, I told you, you don't—"

"Stop it!"

Lisa stomped the floor with her right foot and used her hands to rub her eyes under her glasses.

"Don't do that" she pleaded him, putting her arms down and looking at a seemingly interesting stain on the floor. "Not now. I need to work. I can't allow myself to… Just take your dose and go. Let me do this."

She was squeezing her hands so much that her arms were shaking, and she closed her eyes as her head instinctively looked at her right, refusing to meet his eyes. Lily let out a worried babble, while Lincoln just ran out of words.

"Please" added the gifted child after some seconds of silence.

"Lisa..."

Lincoln leaned in closer, raising an arm to place it on her shoulder, but Lisa grabbed his forearm before he could touch her.

"No… Just… Let me do this. Leave me alone. Please. Do it… do it for me."

He wanted to argue. He wanted to convince her that what she was doing was not healthy. That she shouldn't carry all that weight on her shoulders. That he could do it for her, that he would gladly do it for her. But he had already told her that, and she kept going. Besides, her stoic sister was evidently on the verge of breaking down. It was much too obvious.

He sighed, standing up and walking to the nearby table where a little glass filled with a blue liquid was waiting for him. He quickly looked at Lisa just to confirm that that glass was, in fact, the one he had to drink and not a chemical that would make him grow a second head or turn him into a rabbit again. Lisa barely nodded, and Lincoln gulped it down, already used to the flavor. Lily tried to grab the glass, but Lincoln quickly put it away.

Knowing that Lisa wasn't going to tell him anything else, he decided to leave his questions about the side effects of the antidote for the night. He walked away until he was under the door frame. Before closing it, however, he gave one last look at Lisa. His little sister was again standing in front of her computer, using a strange artifact to study a three-dimensional model too complex for Lincoln to understand.

"Lisa" he called her.

She kept working.

"Take care of yourself, alright?" He sadly and resignedly said before closing the door. He ended up leaning against the hall walls, letting out a sigh.

Lily put one of her tiny hands on his face, caressing his cheek.

"Boo boo?" She asked, looking at him with some curiosity but also a tiny bit of worry.

Lincoln smiled at her.

"Yes, Lily, it feels like a boo boo," he told her, embracing her against his chest and enjoying her company.

She chuckled, and her high and soft laugh felt like a beautiful, relaxing sound for Lincoln. And then, taking him by complete surprise, Lily raised her head and gave him a peck on his cheek. He looked at her, his mouth slightly open.

"Boo boo go" she simply said, reaching her arms to hug him again.

She might not have been able to talk, but Lily had her own ways of effectively communicating with her siblings. She knew that Lincoln was sad and hurt, so she tried to cheer him up. Just like she always kissed his boo-boos away, she was now trying to make him feel better.

Two doors opened up on the hall, and soon both Lucy and Luna stepped out of their respective rooms. The two of them were staring at the ground, but they immediately noticed Lincoln. Lucy stopped dead in her tracks and looked at him with her mouth partially opened, while Luna rushed near him.

"Hey bro, how are ya?" She asked, giving him a tight hug. "Is everything okay? Did you sleep well? Do you need some—?"

"I'm okay, Luna" he answered her with a smile, taking a step back to look at her.

"Yeah, right, sorry, it's just… I don't know..."

"Don't worry, it's okay."

She started to stroke his ashen hair, absently messing it up, although he didn't care. In fact, he closed his eyes and slightly tilted his head to enjoy his sister's caresses a bit better. Luna chuckled at the sight.

"You look like Luan's bunny, Gary, when we pet him" she playfully said. "You look happy just like he does."

"It makes me happy to be with you." The words came up from within his heart, without even thinking what he was saying. He opened up his eyes after saying it, trying to see her reaction. Wasn't that a thing a bit too cheesy to say? Luna staring at him with the sincerest smile, though. She looked moved by his words.

"Oh, bro… You're so cute..."

Her smile soon started to tremble, and her eyes were filled with water. Lincoln's smile wavered too, and he once again took a step forward to wrap his free arm around her. Lily started to clap and make happy noises. She loved group hugs.

"I'm sorry, luv," Luna apologized, wiping her tears away with the back of his hand before they fell from her eyes and ruined her makeup. "You should go downstairs and have your breakfast, I'll stay here for a while. I don't want Lola and Lana to see me like this."

"Don't worry about it," he told her. "Today I… I'll tell them."

As the boy, the baby and the wannabe rock star shared a hug, a fourth figure silently approached them, slipping between her two older siblings' arms. Lincoln and Luna leaned back and looked at Lucy. She didn't say anything for a change, she just threw her arms around them, her body slightly more leaned into Lincoln. The older two of the four shared a knowing look and included her in the hug. Lincoln enjoyed every moment of it. He felt surrounded by love, and even though he could detect sadness and uneasiness in his sisters, he mostly felt their happiness of being with him. He would have allowed himself to get lost in the moment, but he had a mission to fulfill that morning, and regardless of how painfully sad it was bound to be, he had to make it. He needed to do it.

"Let's go downstairs, shall we?" He said after a while, knowing that they couldn't keep delaying their breakfast.

His sisters nodded and they all slowly walked down the stairs with Luna resting one arm on Lincoln's shoulder and Lucy holding one of his hands, being so close to him that their shoulders brushed against each other with every step. Lily was still acting like she was the happiest baby in the whole world.

When they reached the bottom, the whole family was already waiting for them. Lincoln's older sisters and his parents were eating in the dining room, as usual. They quickly greeted Lincoln —they seemed to ignore the other girls, but they didn't feel offended at all— and they went to see how he was.

"I'm okay" he assured them after Luan finally let him go off the tight embrace she had locked him in.

"Son" Mr. Loud called him, "are you ready?"

His mother and the rest of his sisters looked at him with worry in their eyes. Lincoln knew what his father was talking about, they had discussed it the day before when they were at Silver Lake, and then they talked about it a bit more at dinner. Lori was also informed of how things were going to unfold from now on. The eldest sister had her eyes fixed on Lincoln with an indecipherable look. He couldn't read it. Was that a grimace of worry, one of sadness, or was she simply resigned? Were those intense eyes sparkling to show him support, or was she mad that he wouldn't let anyone else interfering with what he was about to do?

Nevertheless, Lincoln knew what he had to do. He knew it. After what had happened with Lucy the day before, he had accepted it. And yet…

"Are you ready?" Asked his father one more time.

He took a second to think about his answer, and it was then when he felt Lucy squeezing his hand. He looked at her, and after a brief silence, he sighed.

"No."

He could feel his family's pain at those words.

"I don't think I could ever be ready for it. But I'm still gonna do it."

"I understand. Girls!" Said his father, raising up his voice so he could be heard from the kitchen. "Come here for a second!"

The twins entered the dining room. They were walking three feet away from each other, and they didn't look happy. Their seeming anger suddenly turned into a mix of surprise and confusion when they spotted the whole family standing in the dining room. Lana stopped moving the finger that was poking her nose and raised an eyebrow, while Lola's gaze immediately went to the point where Lucy was holding Lincoln's hand. When she looked up to meet his eyes, she glared at him like he had just broken one of her favorite tiaras.

"What's going on?" Asked Lana.

"Why aren't Lucy or Lincoln having breakfast with us?" Asked Lola too, looking suspiciously at everyone else in the room.

"They just overslept a bit, honey" Rita quickly replied.

"And why weren't we invited to the family reunion?"

"It's not a family reunion, Lola."

"Yes it is," said Mr. Loud.

"Yes it is," Luan quickly corrected herself.

"Girls… None of you will be attending school today."

Not only did the two blonde girls gasp. With the exception of Lori and Leni, none of the other knew about the decision their parents had made.

"No school?" Asked both twins at the same time, clearly excited, before letting out a sharp squeal.

"I can go to the mall to buy me a new dress!"

"I can check out the trash bins before the trash truck passes!"

The twins started to list out loud all the wonderful things they could do with their unexpected school free day, letting their imagination fly limitless, eventually reaching a point where they imagined how they could all take a plane to some exotic places. So immersed they were in their fantasies that they didn't pay any attention to what the older sisters were saying.

"Is it true?" Asked Lynn "We're not going to school today?"

"You won't have to go until…" Rita cleared her throat and did her best to keep her eyes from diverting towards Lincoln. "You can go back whenever you want. Whenever you feel ready to go back."

Sensing that it was all about to become too emotional to handle in the dining room, Lincoln quickly let go Lucy's hand —who wasn't really happy to let him go—, gave Lily to his mother and looked at the rest of the family. The whole family, except for the twins, behind him, and Lisa, who was locked inside her room.

"We'll have time. I'll make sure to have time with you all" he assured them, looking at each and every one of them in the eyes. "But right now I need some alone time with just them."

No one said anything. No one even nodded. They just kept staring at him. Lincoln sighed, getting himself ready for what was about to come. His right hand briefly touched his stomach, but even though he had just woken up, he wasn't hungry. The anxiety wouldn't let him eat. He could skip breakfast. He decided to bury all his worries. He needed to look happy, at least for now.

"Hey, guys?" He said, stepping next to the twins with the warmest smile he could fake.

The two of them stopped their rambling and looked at him. Lana was smiling, but Lola seemed to be looking at him like she was slightly annoyed.

"Wanna go to the park with me?" He asked.

"Ugh, hard pass" Lola scornfully said. "I'd rather go to the mall, thank you."

"I'm sorry, Lincoln. I can go to the park whenever I want, I should use this time to do things I normally couldn't" Lana excused herself.

Having already finished their breakfast, the two girls started to walk away, walking by his side. However, Lincoln stretched out his arms to keep them from leaving.

"What are you doing?" Lola asked.

Lincoln knelt so he was eye level with his little sisters. He was looking straight forward, biting his lower lip.

"Are you okay?" Asked Lana.

"What about if I buy you some ice-creams, uh?" He offered, smiling at them.

The two girls shared a look before smiling mischievously.

"Deal," they said in unison.

Finally, Lincoln's fake smile became real, his grin also showing in his eyes. He could sacrifice some money for them. It wasn't like he was going to need it, anyway.

"Alright, let's go then," he told them, standing up.

"Son, do you want me to—?"

"Don't worry, dad" Lincoln quickly said. "I don't want you to be late for work."

Lynn Sr nodded in silence. Lincoln walked out of the house, escorted on each side by his two little sisters. They were walking on the sidewalk, and when they finally got away enough from the house so no one in the family could see them, Lola hastily and roughly grabbed Lincoln's hand. He was surprised by the sudden and rough movement and stared at her.

She didn't look as happy as she had just been inside the house when he promised them ice-creams. Now she was looking ahead, pretending that it wasn't a big deal for her, but Lincoln took notice of the clenched jawbones and her slightly blushed cheeks. When he kept staring at him with a dumb smile, Lola finally glared at him through the corner of her eyes.

"Is something wrong, Lincoln?" She asked, without looking at him directly.

He chuckled.

"Nope. None at all."

He used his other hand to grab Lana's. The little plumber wasn't expecting that, but after a warm smile from her brother, her face lightened up and she let him guide her.

They didn't speak that much during the whole walk to the park, but their smiles shone as bright as ever.

"Harder, Lola, push me harder!" Lana encouraged her sister as she laughed, reaching greater heights after every swing.

"My arms are getting tired, jump now!" Complained the girl wearing the pink dress, as she kept pushing the swing everytime it got near her.

"Alright! Three! Two! One! WIIIIII!"

Lana jumped at the highest point and fell on her foot. She stumbled a few steps, but she managed to stop herself before she could fall face first into a puddle of mud. When she finally gained stability, she raised her arms in the air and let out a victory yell.

"Nice jump, Lana!" Lincoln congratulated her from a bench, smiling. "That's definitely a ten!"

"My turn, my turn!" Said Lola, already sitting on the swing.

Lana ran behind her and started to push her, the two of them being watched by Lincoln as he tasted his ice cream. After getting to the park, his sisters and he had enjoyed playing in the slides and chasing each other across the park. As soon as the food stand opened, however, the girls had reclaimed their ice creams, even though they had had breakfast less than an hour ago. Lincoln had no choice but to buy three ice creams and they all sat on a bench to eat. He was actually more interested in talking with them than eating, that's why they had finished their ice creams so much faster than him.

He asked them a lot of questions. He asked Lola about her beauty pageants. After receiving her ice cream, she seemed to relax a bit, and she no longer seemed to be jealous of Lucy holding Lincoln's hand. She was more than willing to talk about her favorite topic: herself. She took her time to talk about all the gossips she had accumulated behind the curtains. She also answered with enthusiasm when he asked about the best beauty techniques. It was then Lana's turn, and she couldn't believe Lincoln was actually interested in asking about each and every one of her pets.

He was now sitting alone on the bench, simply enjoying watching them play. They looked so happy and innocent. Just what he wanted. He had given this a lot of thought, he wanted to take them to a place where they could all have some fun. He wanted to have one last image of them smiling without any worries before breaking the news to them. He wanted to share a moment of innocent and sincere happiness with them before it all changed forever.

His phone vibrated in his pocket, and he decided to check on it, thinking that maybe it was one of his sisters wondering how they were doing. He put the ice cream away from his mouth when he saw he had a message from Liam.

Lincoln, I've just found out, I'm so sorry…

He kept staring at the screen. The school knew about his condition since Friday. He knew that it was just a matter of time before all his classmates found out about it. He quickly received another message, this time from Mollie.

OMG Lincoln, I can't believe it :'( I didn't know, I thought you just had the flue or something :'c

Curious, Lincoln thought. He couldn't remember Mollie ever talking to him in class unless it was absolutely necessary.

A torrent of messages started to flood his phone, without giving him any time to read them all. He simply saw as the conversations started to overlap with each other, each one of his classmates writing him, and soon he started to receive messages from other kids in his school, kids that weren't his friends. He also received a message from Cristina, who swore to him that she hadn't said anything. At this rate, he thought, the whole school would soon know about the fifth-grade kid that was about to die.

Would they remember him for that? Would they remember him at all?

He also received a message from Ronnie Anne, confirming him that the teachers had told their classes about him. Lincoln thought about Ronnie Anne. He hadn't talk with her since Saturday afternoon when he had left Clyde and her to go to Tabby's house as a part of his plan to fix everything with Luna. He should've called her the day before, but between going to the lake with his father and everything that had happened with Lucy, he hadn't even thought about it. He decided that he would call her that same night. So they could at least talk with each other. Maybe they could decide when they could hang out.

All those messages reminded him the reason why he was there in the first place. Why he had taken his sisters to the park. He looked up, just in time to witness the disaster.

"Lana, don't push me so fast!" Complained Lola, holding tightly the swing ropes, her eyes filled with terror.

"Are you kidding me? You're even higher than I was! Jump now!" Lana encouraged her, pushing with more strength every time.

"I'm going too fast! I can't do it!"

"Just jump!"

"I want to slow down!"

"DO IT!"

Lola closed her eyes and jump at the highest point. She flew almost exactly like Lana. She hit the ground almost in the same way too, stumbling. But unlike her twin, Lola was wearing a long dress that got entangled with her feet, and she fell straight into the mud.

Lincoln threw what was left of his ice cream to the ground and ran to see his younger sister.

"Lola! Are you hurt?" He asked, lifting her from the mud and helping her to sit down on the ground. She seemed to be in shock. She was staring at her dress, now completely stained by mud. Even worse, by stomping on her dress and then falling forward, she had overstretched the delicate fabric, which had torn itself apart around her knees, creating a big gash that showed part of her legs.

"My… my dress," she said, touching the fabric right where it was ruined.

"Lola… Don't worry, okay? We'll get Leni to fix it" Lincoln assured her, putting a hand over his little sister's shoulder.

She looked at his eyes, getting ready to cry.

"Are you alright? That was a hard fall" said Lana, slowly walking near her twin.

Lola moved her head to look at her and gave Lana the most frightening stare Lincoln had ever seen. Even Ace Savvy would have been terrified by it.

"This is all your fault!" She yelled, standing up and stomping her way to her sister. "I told you, you were being too rough!"

"What? But… but you fell alright! You jumped exactly like I did!" Lana complained, crossing her arms over her chest.

"You pushed me too strong! I told you I didn't want to do it and you made me! And now… And now my favorite dress is ruined!"

Lola had silently started to shed some tears, and Lincoln could see how afflicted and slightly guilty Lana looked about what had happened.

"Well… Well, maybe you shouldn't wear a dress if you're coming to the park!" She said, however.

"Oh, right, we should all just look like dirty homeless persons all the time!"

"Lola!" Lincoln yelled at her, trying to intervene after seeing Lana's face. She was clearly hurt by her sister's words. The girl quickly changed her attitude.

"Well, you should try it sometime! Maybe if you could step out of your imaginary carriage and you stop acting like you are so much better than the rest of us, then... then maybe you'd had friends!"

"Lana!" Lincoln scolded her, giving her an angry look.

"Well, if I have to be as disgusting as you to have friends, then maybe I'd rather not have any!"

"No one would like to be your friend anyway! You're unbearable!"

"And you're insensitive!"

"I hate it when you are like this!"

"And I hate when you act like a savage!" Cried out Lola, wiping her tiny tears from her eyes. "Sometimes… Sometimes I wish I didn't have a twin!"

It was like a bomb had exploded right next to them. Lincoln had never been close to anything like that, but he had seen movies. It all seemed to be happening in slow motion like they were all paralyzed. He could ever hear that ear ringing sound, a constant and annoying sound that in this case was basically all the background noise of the park. The kids laughing, the wind blowing through the trees, the cars driving down the nearby streets. All of them noises that were suddenly just a nuisance, a background that seemed to be there only so they could realize that time had not actually stopped. Lincoln was slack-jawed, unable to move a muscle, his eyes fixed on his sisters. Lola was glaring at Lana the way she would glare at someone who would wear sandals and socks.

Lana's face, meanwhile, was enough to break Lincoln's heart. She looked without understanding, perhaps believing that she had misheard. But as the seconds slowly passed by, she seemed to realize that her ears were working just fine. Her first reaction was to start to silently cry, with tears slowly falling from her eyes in two small trails, a thin stream of salty water. Her arms and legs started to tremble, doing their best to keep her standing.

Her second reaction was to jump right onto Lola, throwing her to the ground.

Lincoln had witnessed countless fights between his sisters, especially between the twins. They spend half of the time doing absolutely everything together like there was nothing in the world that could separate them, and the other half they fought over the most trivial things. Lincoln had never seen them fighting like that, though. They were aiming to hurt. They were not holding any punches.

Lincoln looked around him. People in the park were staring at them. Many mothers were grabbing their kids hands and took them away, not wanting to expose them to such levels of violence. His ten sisters always called the "sisters fight protocol", where they simply stepped away from any kind of conflict, letting the involved sisters resolve their differences on their own time. They all seemed to believe that it worked, but Lincoln didn't understand it.

He had his own protocol.

"Alright, that's it!"

Knowing very well that he was exposing himself to become collateral damage, Lincoln walked into the whirlwind that his sisters had become. Making use of a strength that could be expected more from Lynn rather than him, he managed to separate them. He put his open palms on each of their foreheads, to keep them from running straight into each other again.

"Stop it!" He yelled, doing his best effort to stop them.

"I hate you!"

"I hate you!"

"ENOUGH!"

Lincoln's yell ended up driving away the rest of the kids in the park, but it mostly served to immediately silence his sisters. The two of them stopped fighting and yelling at each other, looking at him terrified, like they were afraid that he would hurt them. Their frightened faces didn't calm him down at all. He grabbed them by their wrist, a little tighter than he needed to, and quickly dragged them somewhere else where they wouldn't be bothered.

"I just wanted to have some quality time with you two" he started to mutter through gritted teeth, walking fast with the two girls trying to keep up with him. "I wanted to see you having some fun, laughing, enjoying this day. And you couldn't even grant me that."

"Lincoln… what are you saying?" Asked a worried Lola.

"Where are we going?" Wondered Lana.

"Somewhere we don't scare people away from the park. In case you didn't notice, your little show ruined the day to a lot of kids."

Since he was looking forward, he couldn't see his sisters faces, but their voices were clearly tainted with fear.

"We didn't… We… You're overreacting..."

He finally found a good spot, a place no one would bother them.

"Sit down."

He was aware that he had sounded like his father. His body posture, his tone, his attitude. His sisters obeyed right away, more out of fear than respect. Lincoln started to walk in circles in front of them. He was furious, so he wanted to think his words carefully because if he talked the first thing that came to his mind, he might ending up hurting them. And that was definitely not his intention.

"I love you."

He said it out of nowhere. He simply stopped, sighed, and told them that, without even looking at them. Then he did turn around and saw how they were both sitting on the ground, two feet away from each other. They had this little tear trails on their cheeks, and they were looking at him with confused eyes. He was mad, yes, but he still had a heart, and see them like that softened him up. He knelt before them and then he carefully and tenderly started to wipe their cheeks.

"You two and the rest of the girls are what I love the most in this world. I'm givi… I mean, I would give it all for you. Everything. I know I hadn't been the perfect brother, I know I've been selfish and that I've made you guys angry a lot of times. But I love you with all my heart."

"We love you too," they said at the same time, in a low voice and looking away.

"I know. I know that you love me, and I know that even though we have had troubles before, we are always looking out for each other."

"What are you trying to say?"

"That I don't understand how can you two be always looking for excuses to fight" he answered, looking disappointed at them. "You fight over the most stupid things."

Lola moved uncomfortable in her place.

"We're not the only ones who fight…"

"No, you're not. Lynn and Lucy usually fight, but only when they run out of patience. Lori and Leni have a fight every now and then, but in their twisted feminine logic, their fights always have some kind of sense. And whenever one of you girls gets into a fight with me, most of the time that's because I did something to deserve it. But you two? You fight over nothing. It's like you enjoy being mad at each other. You don't even try to fix it before it escalates. And I'm afraid that as you grow up, your fights will be getting more and more serious. You have to… You need to learn to resolve your problems in a peaceful way, to keep them from happening in the first place because you can't… you can't count on me to make everything better! I'm not gonna be here forever to solve your differences!"

Lola and Lana looked at each other for a second after their brother's words, but their eyes quickly dropped to their laps. Lola's fingers started to touch the gash on her dress, sadly caressing her exposed legs.

"Lana" Lincoln started, looking severely at her, "you shouldn't have forced her to jump. You know she's not as used to rough playing like you are. You can't force her to do things she doesn't want to. And what you said about her not having friends was a very mean thing to say. Lola has a lot of friends, and people love her for who she is. You shouldn't have said that."

Lana took his red cap and started to squeeze it with her nervous hands, partially hiding her face behind it, ashamed of what she said.

"And Lola" he continued, looking at the other girl, "you know as much as I do that she didn't want you to be hurt, and what happened to your dress was an accident. She just wanted to have fun with you, even if the game turned out to be a little too dangerous for you. But nothing can justify what you said. She's your sister, your twin, and what you said was terrible."

Lola couldn't look him in the eye.

"Are you… are you mad at me?" She weakly asked, pressing her knees against her chest.

"No" Lincoln hurriedly said. "I'm just a little disappointed. Look, I know you didn't mean it, that it was something you said in the heat of the moment. But, Lola, you can't say that. You just can't. Family… Family is the most important thing. More than anything, more than everything else. You've been together since before you were born, you can't be fighting like this. You're playing with fire. One of these days one of your fights will go out of control and..."

He sat in front of them, suddenly exhausted, having lost his initial energy.

"Guys, you can't take family for granted" he lamented. "On the contrary. We're so many siblings, and we're so used to each other that we don't realize it, but we should be grateful that we have each other. Every day, we should be thankful that we have such a big, loving family that will always be there for us."

He didn't have enough time to react. His little sisters jumped right into his arms, resting their heads on his shoulders.

"We're sorry, Lincoln!" They both said, embracing him with all their strength.

He enjoyed the hug. He wrapped his arms around their waists and held her tight against him, closing his eyes.

After breaking away from the hug, Lincoln sat with his legs crossed on the ground, and both girls sitting on his thighs. The two of them apologized to each other. They admitted they had overreacted, that the things they had said weren't true, that they hadn't meant it. They sealed their reconciliation with a loving sisters hug. That's exactly what Lincoln wanted to see. What he wanted to remember.

"Can we go back to play?" Asked Lana, looking at her older brother.

"Actually… Let's stay here. There's something I need to tell you" he said, as he gently stroked their backs.

Lola and Lana stared at him, slightly confused. It was hard for Lincoln to be this close to them, with those two pairs of bright, innocent eyes looking at him with interest. Lost in his own face, reflected in his sisters' pupils, he wondered how other people did this. Surely there were thousands of people in the world in his same situation, having to say goodbye to their loved ones. He wondered where did they find the strength needed to do so, how could they do it without breaking down.

And then he remembered everything that he had tried to explain to Luna. Sometimes, you just got to let it hurt.

He had troubles starting, though. It was obvious that even if he knew what he had to say, even though he understood it was something necessary, he simply couldn't find the courage to do it.

"Are you going to tell us why is everyone sad?" Asked Lola, almost in a whisper.

Lincoln wasn't expecting that. He let out a big sigh.

"You figured it out?"

"We don't know what it is" Lana explained, also speaking in an undertone, "but everyone's been acting weird lately."

"Yeah, no one ever tells us anything whenever we make noise or we're fighting. Except for you."

"And they're getting into a lot of troubles. Lynn..."

"Luna..."

"Lucy..."

"Lisa's not coming out of her room…"

"Luan isn't making new puppet shows for us anymore..."

"Yesterday I asked Leni to borrow some makeup and she didn't say anything..."

"And Lori is coming into our rooms every night" Lana finally said. "She wishes us good night and tucks us in."

"She had stopped doing that when we were four" added Lola.

"And mom and dad..."

"Yeah, they're acting weird too. Mom is working all day in her room. She's not helping me comb my hair before ballet classes."

"And dad's always tired, he doesn't want to help me fix Vanzilla's motor."

Lincoln felt like he was swallowing a heavy ball of guilt. He thought they wouldn't notice anything. They were kids, but there were evidently not blind. Of course, they realized there was something wrong. Something very wrong. It also hurt him to find out about those little details, like Luan didn't play with them like she used to, or that Lori was tucking them in at night. Lincoln realized he wasn't aware of just how much his approaching death was affecting his loved ones.

Just like none of them seemed to understand how much he himself was suffering.

"Do you know what's going on?" Lana asked him.

Lincoln snapped back to reality. He wasn't there to grief about himself. He was there because he needed to tell them the truth.

"Yes. I know. But before I tell you… I want to apologize."

The two girls exchanged a look for a second, before looking back at him, tilting their heads a little to the side.

"Why for?" Asked Lola.

"Because it's my fault you don't know what's going on."

His sisters frowned.

"Your fault?"

"I asked everyone not to tell you anything."

"What?!" Said the two at the same time, slightly angry at his words.

"Why would you do that?"

"Because I didn't want to tell you. I didn't want you to know. But you need to know."

"What's going on?"

He stroked their backs again, trying to ease them.

"You see, I… Remember when I was in the hospital?" He told them, after clearing his throat, doing a great effort to keep himself from breaking down.

"Well, yeah, duh, that was last week," said Lola, like it was a dumb question.

Lana didn't say anything. She just squinted her eyes, looking at him.

"Well… Let's say that… They did some test on me and they… They found..."

Was it necessary to explain the whole tumors deal? If he did, then he would have to take some time to explain to them that it had not been Lynn's fault, that she had actually saved his life. He had just found out that he shouldn't underestimate his sisters just for their age, but even so, would they be able to understand the details of his condition?

If anything, they could ask their parents about it when they were older. When they were ready. If they ever wanted to know.

"They found out that I'm sick. My heart is sick."

Their reaction was immediate. They raised their eyebrows, their jaws dropped a little. He saw them rapidly blinking, trying to understand.

"Your…?"

"...heart?"

"Yes. It's, uh… It's not healthy. It has some problems, and… uh… soon… in about a week, it won't be able to work anymore" he saw and heard how they sharply inhaled, "and when that happens… I'm… I'm… going to d-die."

Just a second after he said it, he felt a twitching pain in his eyes, needing to blink fast several times to keep himself together. It was as terrible and as painful as he had imagined it would be. Maybe even a little more, because they didn't react like he thought they would. He imagined that they would start to cry right away. That they would be weeping uncontrollably, and that he would be there to comfort them. He would cry with them, he would be there just like he had been with Lucy the day before, or with Luna the day before that one. He would hug them until they would fall asleep like he had done with Luan. He thought he was ready for it.

But nothing could have prepared him for their reaction.

"It's not funny, Lincoln," said Lola, the words coming out slow from her mouth.

"I'm not… I'm not kidding."

"Don't say that," said Lana too, slowly shaking her head, her eyes fixed on her brother. "Why would you say those things?"

"If you're trying to teach us a lesson to stop fighting each other, you're doing an awful job!" Yelled Lola, through her shallow rapid breathing. "You don't know how to do it!"

"Girls… It's the truth."

"That's a lie and you know it!" Complained Lola again, moving off his thigh and standing right next to him, looking at him with utter anger.

"Lola..."

"No! You're fine!" She interrupted him. "You're fine and you'll stay fine! Don't say those ugly things!"

"You can't… You can't be sick" said Lana, who was still sitting on her brother's thigh. She didn't look angry like Lola, she was simply confused. "The doctors let you go home."

"Exactly! She's right!" Lola quickly said, furiously nodding. "The doctor wouldn't let you go if there was something wrong with you! You're with us, so you're fine! Stop lying!"

"I'm not lying. I'm really sick. I swear I'm telling the truth."

Lola closed her eyes and violently shook her head from side to side.

"But… But if you're sick you need to get back to the hospital! They'll fix you!"

"They let me go because there's nothing they can do. They can't save me."

Lana was staring at Lincoln's face. Simply staring at him.

"N-No... They… They fix people" Lola kept saying, taking a step closer to her brother. "When you're sick you go to the doctors, so they tell you what's wrong and they cure you. That's their job. They get paid to cure people!"

"Sometimes they can't save everyone, Lola" Lincoln regretfully explained. "They couldn't save me."

"Well, they will!" She yelled at him, getting close enough to grab him by the neck of his shirt, and then she started to shake him. "I'm taking you to the hospital right now, and they'll cure you! You – can't – die!"

He put one on his hands on top of Lola's to stop her shaking him.

"I'm sorry Lola but… I can."

"No… No, you can't" she complained, wrinkling her little nose and blinking to contain her tears. "You can't."

"Why not?"

"B-Be… Because you're my brother" she said, as the first tear escaped her eyelids.

"Old people die" softly said Lana, still looking at Lincoln with innocent eyes. Unlike Lola's —where the tears were reflecting light, making them shine like there was a little flame dancing inside—, Lana's eyes seemed to have lost all brightness, like life was taken away from them. "Like Hannah's grandma. You… You're not… old. You're younger than Lori. Younger than dad. Y-You… you can't..."

Her mouth kept moving, but no words were coming out from her mouth. It was like her throat was choking, fighting for air, unable to speak, too scared to do it. By now, Lincoln's defenses had been already taken to the limit, and his orange shirt was starting to soak on his tears. Lola's crying had also begun, and the mask on her eyelashes was slowly falling down her cheeks, branching into irregular shapes like a drop of black ink falling into a glass of water.

"Please, tell me you're lying" she begged, panting. "I swear I won't be mad. I'll never be mad at you again. I won't yell at you. I'll let you read your comics in your underwear anytime you want, but please, tell me this isn't true. Please."

Lincoln still had his hand on top of hers. He gently squeezed her hand, and Lola immediately knelt right next to him, following the movement he was subtly hinting. Once she was a little lower than eye level with him, Lincoln raised his hand and fixed Lola's blonde tuft. He couldn't answer her. He couldn't say anything, but he didn't need to. His silence was enough.

"Please" she repeated, with her tears now reaching her lips. "Don't do this to me. Don't go."

"There's nothing I can do, Lola" he apologized, trying to keep his voice from shaking.

"No… No… You got to get better. You… You need to get better. I'll make a tea party for you" she cried, closing her eyes. "You'll be the honored guest, and you'll have the best cup. And all the girls will be invited, and… and we'll all laugh… And you can eat as many cookies as you want..."

"Lola..."

"We planted a tree" Lana suddenly said.

He looked at his other sister.

"It's our tree" she continued. "It's gonna grow. We'll make our house there, so you can read your comics and I can play with my toys, and we'll be happy. It'll… it'll be there forever."

"That's exactly why I asked you to take care of it, Lana," he said.

And Lincoln knew that was the precise moment when Lana understood. He saw it in her eyes. He saw how her pupils widened, and he also saw something breaking up inside her, like a fragile crystal shattering into a million pieces. Lana gasped, and she brought a hand to her chest like she was trying to check her breathing, or like she had been stabbed. Her face twisted into the most precise and eloquent expression of horror that Lincoln had ever witnessed. A visual reference that any artist would kill to have, but one that Lincoln wished he never had to see.

After the initial shock of understanding faded away, Lana's reaction was quick to appear.

"No… No, no, no, no, Lincoln… You can't… die" she told him, quickly starting to cry. "We've… We have to take care of the tree!"

"I know you'll be able to do it, Lana."

"You p-promised me y-y-you would buy me a dress when I finally get to win the Little Miss America Pageant," said Lola, her weeping making it hard for Lincoln to understand her. "You promised m-me you w-would be at my wedding. You were going to help me with the hair."

"You'll find someone better than me to..."

"NO!" Screamed Lola, shaking her head so violently that her tiara fell to the ground.

"Don't say that!" Complained Lana, starting to hit him in the chest with her closed fists. "Don't say it!"

"There's no one better than you! You're my brother! I'm… I'm… I'm your princess! You can't leave me alone!"

"I had to… to bury many pets" said Lana, as she stopped hitting him and opting instead to close her hands on his shirt, messing it up. "I don't like it. It's not pretty. I don't… I don't want to bury you."

"I need you to help me practice my ribbon dance—"

"I need you to help me train Charles—"

"...hug me when I'm afraid—"

"...color my drawings—"

"...watch movies with us—"

"...stories from when we were younger—"

They were talking at the same time, overlapping with each other, not letting Lincoln getting what they were saying. But he didn't need to listen to each of their words to understand what they were trying to say. The communication was clear, even without the words. Lincoln didn't have the strength to ask them to calm down. He just wrapped his arms around them and embraced his sisters, bringing them closer to him. The two of them let him did as he pleased, pressing their soaked and mask stained cheeks so hard against his chest to leave an imprint of their faces on his shirt.

They kept talking to him until the crying overwhelmed them. They couldn't talk anymore, the only sounds that could escape their mouths were groans and gasps of pain, that added to the sound of their shallow and rapid breathing created the saddest symphony ever. The minutes passing by didn't seem to help them reduce their grief. On the contrary, the pain got worse. They were yelling like they had been set on fire. They twisted against his chest, staining his polo with everything that came out of their eyes, mouths, and noses.

Eventually, however, their throats and lungs couldn't keep up with their feelings, so the intensity of their lament decreased a little. Lincoln, who wasn't precisely serene neither, tightened his grip on them and seized the moment to talk with them.

"I'm sorry I can't fulfill all my promises," he told them, quickly kissing their heads. "I wish I could do them all, and much more too. But even dead, I'll never leave you alone. I'll look after you from wherever I may be. I'll follow you wherever you go, and I'll be always protecting you."

"W-We need you..." they said in unison.

"And I'll always be there for you whenever you need me. When you don't know what to do, I'll be the voice inside your head, advising you" he explained, trying to smile even if they couldn't see it. Maybe they could at least feel it. "Whenever you need a caress, I'll be the blowing wind, tousling your hairs and whispering an 'I love you' in your ears. I'll be the Sun waking you up every morning, and the pigeons and butterflies that come to greet you. But most of all..."

He broke away from the hug just enough to look at them in the eye. He carefully contemplated them both. They had different hairstyles. One was wearing a red cap, the other one had lost her tiara. One was wearing every-weather clothes, the other one an elegant —although stained and gashed— dress. One had makeup all over her cheeks, the other one didn't.

And even so, her cryings were identical. Their tears were falling parallel to each others. Their pain was just as terrible.

"...no matter how much time passes, where life takes you… No matter how many people you may meet, how many people you may fall in love with… no matter what you do, you can always remember me as your big brother, the one who loved you more than anyone else in this world."

To say that his words reassured them would be an exaggeration. There was nothing that words could really make to ease the pain they were both suffering deep inside their hearts, their soul. It was a sadness that was simply impossible to cover. The pain had ingrained itself in their hearts, and it was there to stay. It wasn't planning on leaving anytime soon. It might never leave them.

But even with all that pain, their hearts still had room for other emotions, like love. When Lincoln finished telling them those beautiful words and embraced them again, they could feel all the love he was giving away for them. A warm feeling that was surrounding them, that flooded them from the inside like a cup of hot chocolate on a winter morning. A soft and invisible hug to their hearts. An emotion that was just as big as the pain. The pain, precisely, originated directly from the immense love they felt for their brother. Two completely opposite emotions that were still closely related to each other. They were both there, and even though they were too young to understand it on a rational level, they instinctively knew that it wasn't about an emotion overpowering the other, pushing it out of their hearts.

Their hearts held both emotions. They were shared, they were both there to stay. It was up to them to decide which were they going to allow themselves to be lost into.

They spend the rest of the morning crying on Lincoln's chest, but their tears were no longer tinted with sour pain; they were instead saturated with the bittersweet taste of the purest and unconditional love they had ever known: the love for their brother.

.

.

Now I really am happy with how this chapter turned out. I liked writing it.

But now… I don't know how to say this without spoiling anything…

Well, the whole family knows it now. His death is no longer a secret. Lincoln has had a lot of time with his sisters, and he has taught most of them valuables lessons. I've given you 18 chapters that, I hope, you have all enjoyed. Over 160K words. Many tears were shed. And… we're close to the end.

Like, closer than you can possibly imagine.

Next chapter will be the most special. You may be surprised. You may hate me.

It'll come sooner than you expect since it's a cap I know by heart. I've been thinking and thinking about it, writing it over and over in my head for a long time. It will also come with an announce that, given the circumstances, clearly deserves to be posted with the next chapter. I wouldn't want to post it in any other chapter.

My eternal thanks to all of you. I appreciate you've come with me so far in this long journey.

Thank you so much.