54. Ch 49:The greatest of these is love pt 3

Ch 49 Part 3

Darcy suddenly found himself alone with the woman who would forever be linked with the scent of honeysuckle in his mind and heart. It seems my brothers to be were even more anxious than me. He glanced over to see Lizzy silhouetted in a sunbeam, surrounded by flowery boughs. If there were but a way to capture this image! She is breathtaking.

"Would you be so kind as to help me reach that branch?" she softly asked, startling him from his reverie. She stepped past him, shears in hand.

Obligingly, he reached to pull the vine laden branch toward her hand and held it while she clipped the blossoms and tucked them into her basket. When she reached for more, he caught her hand and stopped her. She looked at him quizzically as he held her hand, gently entwining his fingers with hers. He pulled her slowly toward him and pressed the back of her hand to his lips. Turning his face toward her, he pressed her hand to his cheek and cradled it there.

"You seem quite distracted this morning," she said softly, staring into his dark eyes. What are you thinking, your expression is so odd.

"So I am, Miss Elizabeth." He nodded solemnly. "I was just recalling the first time we walked through this grove together."

"And what of it are you remembering?"

"It was the first time you allowed me to call myself your friend." He pressed his lips to the back of her hand again. She blushed deeply. "We spoke of preserving the essence of spring to stay us through the winter months."

A gentle smile lit her face as she looked away. "We did. I remember that conversation well." She looked up, caressing him with her eyes. "It is a rare man who would have such a conversation and a rarer one still who would recall it with such pleasure in his voice."

He guided her hand into the crook of his elbow and led her along the pathway, deeper into the woods. "I meant to ask you that day, but we were distracted by other things…" He felt her fingers tighten on his arm. "How is it that you go about this small wonder: putting the essence of spring in a bottle?"

She laughed brightly. "I am quite certain I have never heard a gentleman ask such a thing." Papa would find your question most singular.

He chuckled, patting her hand warmly. "I can assure you, Miss Elizabeth, I am most interested."

"You have such a unique range of interests, sir."

First among them is you. His eyes glittered as he lifted his brows.

"I will, however, humor your request." She offered him a sidelong glance and grinned

"I am your pupil; tell me where I would begin to accomplish such a feat."

"I should believe that it would be obvious. You have already begun. The first step is, of course, to gather the blossoms." She laughed openly now, shaking her head.

"Naturally. Do go on." I do so love the sound of her voice.

"It is best to do so early in the morning, when the dew is still fresh upon them." She removed a sprig of blossoms from her basket and held them up for him to smell. "You see how fragrant they are? In the heat of the afternoon, the perfume diminishes." Darcy nodded somberly. "After they are picked, we will take them back to the still room, and the real work begins. The flowers must be plucked from the stems and then chopped. Depending on how we wish to use the fragrance, the petals will be soaked in water or oil for several days. Then the petals are strained out, leaving their fragrance behind."

They walked a few steps in silence, his expression becoming more thoughtful. "I wonder if my mother did such things. I imagine she would have. She loved her gardens dearly. I am certain she would have wanted to preserve the essence of the flowers she worked so diligently to grow," Darcy mused aloud. "I do not believe my sister has ever learned how make perfume. I have never heard her mention a still room or gathering flowers for anything but a vase in the drawing room. She has missed more that I realized not having a mother or sister to guide her."

She squeezed his arm. "It must have been difficult trying to guide such a young girl on your own."

How is it that you always know what I mean to say, even when I do not say it? Darcy did not answer, but stopped mid-step and looked about.

"What are you searching for, sir?" Lizzy glanced back and forth, alarmed.

"Your old tom cat," Darcy answered with a peculiar smile.

"Our cat? Whatever for?" I must not have heard him correctly.

"I feel the need to extol your virtues, Miss Elizabeth, and you gave me strict instructions…."

She covered her mouth and began to giggle, then looked up at him, the merriment glittering in her eyes.

"But I am afraid he is nowhere to be found. What am I to do? I dare not ignore your directions." He cocked his head toward her, waiting.

She blinked at him, astonished. Only a short time ago, I would not have believed him capable of such humor! "I do not suppose you can quell this urge until our cat can be found." She lifted her brows, then shook her head. "No, I can tell by your face that you cannot. Since you were gracious enough to accompany me on an errand few men would condone, I imagine I should return the favor. I will give you leave, for a few minutes, to speak freely what is on your mind." She stared in wonder as his countenance changed from teasing to elated.

A joyful glow lit his eyes as a smile dimpled his cheeks. Suddenly he threw back his head and laughed. He laughed so hard tears flowed. Wiping them away, he grinned silently at her.

"I am all astonishment, Mr. Darcy. I do not pretend to know what was on your mind to say, but I must admit this is not what I had expected." She crossed her arms before her, weaving her hands through the basket handle.

"I am sorry, Miss Elizabeth, I can only image how very odd this must seem. I had hoped for such a moment as this, only to find myself entirely speechless the instant you gave me permission to voice my admiration." He chuckled again, dragging the back of his hand across his eyes once more.

She regarded him a moment before she began to laugh as well. "I shall have to remember this. Giving you permission to speak is the surest way to render you speechless!"

Suddenly serious, he caught her hands, "No, it is you yourself, Miss Elizabeth, that renders me speechless."

Her breath hitched as the warmth of his hands penetrated her gloves. His fingertips found the soft flesh of her wrists, sending a chill down her spine.

"I have long thought you one of the handsomest women of my acquaintance," he whispered, his breathy voice an intimate caress.

She felt the touch of his words, soft upon her face. She blinked several time and fell into his gaze with a heavy breath. His eyes…

"You are too generous to trifle with me, my dear Miss Elizabeth. My affections and wishes are unchanged, but one word from you will silence me on this subject." She drew breath to speak, but he continued, undaunted. "I know it was only a very short time ago that you graciously consented to allow me to court you. In the eyes of many I know, this is far too soon…"

"Mr. Darcy," she whispered, her lip catching in her teeth.

"Please, allow me to finish. I have only just found my words, and I do not wish to lose them once again." He looked at her beseechingly, pausing to place a kiss on the back of her hand and another on the bare skin at her wrist. She shivered at his touch. "Since the unfortunate events at Longbourn, we have been much in one another's company…"

"I have been so grateful for your assistance. I fear I have not been vocal enough in my appreciation. I am sure I have not been. Your help has been invaluable, and your support to my father and my family…" the words tumbled out before she could stop them.

Oh that you would always look at me that way. "It is not your gratitude that I seek. But if you will thank me,'' he interrupted, "let it be for yourself alone. That the wish of giving happiness to you might add force to the other inducements which led me on, I shall not attempt to deny. But your family owe me nothing. Much as I respect them, I believe I thought only of you."

She blushed and looked away briefly but could not long be away from his mesmerizing gaze.

"In my own selfishness, I have cherished these days, despite knowing the evil that was their source. Working side by side with you I have dreaded the knowledge that accomplishing the tasks we set out to do would bring them to an end. I have seen you in ways few men have the opportunity to see they woman they hope to marry. You are as beautiful in the midst of all the work and repairs going on at Longbourn with soot on your cheek and the curl at the nape of your neck escaping its pin as you were at the most recent assembly with every hair in place and your dress so finely pressed. Yours is a beauty that goes beyond that of most women I have known. It penetrates deep within to the very depth of your soul, and it is enchanting."

Tears filled her eyes though she struggled to blink them back.

He lifted his hand to brush her cheek, catching a stray tear with his finger. Do not cry my dearest one. He dropped to his knee, cradling her hands in his once more. "Say you will be my wife…Elizabeth," he spoke her name with a longing whisper. "Do not keep me waiting any further. If you wish, we can wait to wed until Longbourn is whole again, but keep me in suspense no longer." He bowed his head, pressing his forehead to her hands.

The knot in her throat made it difficult to speak. "My father has always stressed that above all, I must be able to respect the man that I would marry. I am ashamed to admit it, but there are in truth few men that I can look upon with respect." She saw his shoulders sag slightly, and sadness pulled at the corners of his eyes. "However, as I have worked with you these weeks, I have come to see that you are indeed the best of men. My sister, Jane, and I have often talked of our desire to marry for love. But to find a man whom I could both love and respect seemed an impossible thing." She swallowed hard, freeing her hand to touch his cheek. "But somehow I have been blessed to have found both in you, Mr. Darcy…Fitzwilliam." She smiled, her eyes glittering.

He drew in a deep breath and rose to his feet. Without knowing quite how, he found her in his arms, crushed to his chest.

She looked up at him and whispered, "I will be most happy to marry you…"

He cut off her words with a gentle kiss. Suddenly a deep laugh rumbled through his chest.

"What do you find so amusing at a moment like this?" she demanded with feigned ire. I love the sound of his laughter. I want my children to always know such a sound.

"When I first came to Meryton, I had a conversation with Mr. Bradley regarding the unlikelihood of finding a wife while I was here. That was certainly not my purpose in visiting here. It was indeed the farthest thing from my mind when I met you that day in your father's woods."

"It does seem that the ways of Providence are not as our ways." A mischievous grin played about her lips. "To think I have agreed to marry a trespasser and a thief."

He stared at her, shocked then dissolved in peals of laughter. Their merriment rang out in the woods and echoed back to them, blanketing them in the warm embrace of their love.

"Miss Kitty! Miss Kitty!" Bingley's exasperation grew as he searched through the trees. Where has she gone? I cannot fathom how a game of hide and seek should be the first thing on her mind at a time like this! He heard the rustle of a skirt and the crunch of footfalls. "There you are!" He dashed off at a sprint.

Kitty took flight, giggling, and rushed off through the trees, jumping a fallen branch and dancing through a patch of thick bushes. Panting, she paused for a moment, only to feel Bingley's strong hand catch her arm. "I have you! Do not run!" He wheezed hard, bracing his other hand on his thigh and struggling for breath.

"Have you not the strength for a child's game of hide and seek, sir?" she teased, fighting to catch her own breath. "Come," she tried to pull away, "I will race you…"

"No," he said sharply. Seeing the hurt in her eyes, he softened his tone, "Please, Miss Kitty, no more games. I have no wish to run any farther this morning."

Chastened, she looked down, avoiding his eyes.

This will not do. "I wish to talk with you. Is there a place nearby where we can rest?"

Nodding silently, she led him a short way through the woods to several large rocks. "When we were small, we would bring a basket and our dolls out here and serve them tea," she explained shyly. "Hill would always send us with a tin of biscuits, even though she would complain she did not have time for such games."

"You came to this spot with your sisters?"

"With Lydia usually, sometimes with Maria Lucas," she replied, looking off into the distance. "Jane and Lizzy were too old for such games then and Mary rather practice her pianoforte."

"You seemed troubled by the memory. I am surprised, as I thought such a thing would be pleasant to recall. I have many fond memories of childhood diversions, and of biscuits." He chuckled and guided them to sit on one of the rocks.

"It used to be a more pleasant memory, I think." She frowned thoughtfully. "I think I was a different person then."

"And you do not know how to feel about that," Bingley offered knowingly.

"Indeed, Mr. Bingley." She glanced up at him. You understand so well, I do not know whether to be pleased or embarrassed.

He smiled a little sadly, "I quite understand what you mean. I find myself thinking such things often." He nodded at the question on her face. "My stay in Meryton has quite changed me, and at times, it is a disconcerting thing." You are the only one to whom I would admit this.

Relaxing somewhat, Kitty leaned against his shoulder. Pleased, he pressed into her.

"I fear I used to follow Lydia far too easily, and I am not proud of that," she mused. "I wonder that it was ever so easy to do so. I do not believe I had any idea I could tell her 'no.' How different life has become in just this short season."

"And I used to permit my sister to lead me in much the same way, I fear. And it is far less becoming for a man to do so than a woman," Bingley laughed, self-deprecatingly.

"I believe your sister and mine have some definite similarities." She pressed her lips together firmly, then sighed as she looked into the woods. "I remember being jealous that Lyddie was my mother's favorite. I sometimes dreamt of what it would be like to be so favored. I wanted that. But recently, I have begun to wonder if it is possible that being the favorite child may not be such a good thing after all. It seems to have reflected poorly in the characters of our sisters."

"Perhaps you are correct," Bingley nodded, looking up into the treetops. "We shall have to be very careful then with our children…" He grimaced as he heard his own words. I have gone too far!

"I wonder if it should be very difficult to not have a favorite among them. I admit it would be difficult not to favor one who looked very much like you…" Kitty bit her lip and blushed. What an indelicate thing for me to say!

Bingley stared at her wide-eyed and began to laugh. "I suppose there is no hope for it! We must simply come out and talk about this." He turned to look at her, pleased when she nodded. "Where do we begin?" He gathered her hands in his.

"I think perhaps it is too late to ask that question, sir, for we have already begun," she chuckled. "Perhaps the better query is when do [i]we[/i] begin."

"You are quite correct, my dearest Kitty…Miss Kitty. Forgive me, for I am already beyond…"

"Charles," she whispered, "there is no need to apologize."

"Then what are we to do. Surely you know what was on the minds of my companions this morning."

"I must admit I have suspected their purpose. The look on their faces was rather obvious." She fell awkwardly silent.

"And what of the look on mine?"

"Charles, are you sure…"

"Have you changed your mind?" It is as I feared. Such a woman could not be held by such an inconstant fellow as me.

"No, no it is not that. But I wonder if you have? I fear I am not…"

"Not what?" He demanded angrily, springing to his feet and pacing. "Not as serene and compliant as Jane? Not as beautiful as her? Not as witty and intelligent as Elizabeth? Not as comforting and wise as Mary? Or is it someone else still that you are comparing yourself to?"

Kitty pressed her hands to her face and nodded. "How can you be satisfied…"

"Stop," he declared firmly. "You will stop this now." She looked up at him startled. I cannot believe I am speaking to her like this! But I cannot stop yet. She must hear me out, for somehow she has not heard me the times I have said it before. "Yes, I have heard all about how wonderful and perfect your sisters are. They are paragons of ladylike virtue and all that is good and womanly."

She stared at him wide-eyed. What has come over him?

"But I do not care to speak of them any longer. Can you not understand that I am in no way settling for you as the last remaining sister? This neighborhood has many lovely young women, and I have no doubt I could find pretty and pleasant company easily enough among them."

Kitty looked away angrily, tears welling in her eyes. Suddenly Bingley was crouching before her, his face close to hers.

"But I am not with them because I want to be with you. I have no interest in Jane. Someone once asked me if I did, and I had to tell them I did not because, to be honest, she is far too elegant for the likes of me. She frightens me." He laughed softly. "Your sister Lizzy is far too intelligent for me to keep up with her. I am not a great reader, and often do not understand half of what she says. And Mary, dear sweet Mary," he rolled his eyes. "Yes, she is a kind, generous girl, and a fount of wisdom to be sure. But I find her dull indeed. Can you imagine her leading me through these woods playing hide and seek?"

Kitty shook her head, "No, she never enjoyed that kind of play."

"But I do. I love to laugh and to play, and so do you." He ran his hand down his face. "That is not what I meant to say. How is it that it is usually so easy to speak to you, but today I cannot find the words?" The hopeful look on her face urged him to continue. "I know you look at yourself meanly, Kitty, and I understand why. But you have brought out the best in me. You have caused me to be something I never thought I could be. Never before have I been able to stand up to Caroline. Never before have I made decisions with such confidence. It is all because I have had you beside me…believing in me. You give me strength I did not know I had. I am a better man because of you."

She drew in a breath as if to speak, but did not. He laid his hand warmly against her cheek.

"I admire you so much, and I want to give you what you have given me. I want you to see yourself the way that I do." Impulsively, he leaned down and kissed her tenderly.

She gasped, "Charles?" I do not know if I should slap you or ask you to do that again.

"I know it is unfashionable, and perhaps even indecorous of me to say this, but I love you, Kitty Bennet, and I wish for you to be my wife. You know that. By luncheon today, I believe that your three elder sisters will be engaged. I know what we have talked about, but I am asking you do you wish to be included in that number, for I would gladly make our understanding official right now."

"I…I…I do not know," Kitty whispered, her heart in her throat.

"I know your desire for Louisa to have her day, and I love you all the more for it. But she would not be pleased if it came at your expense." He caressed her cheek tenderly. "I do not know your mother, and I have no way to predict how she will respond. But I do know that I would not have her disparage you because you are not yet engaged, nor do I wish you ignored because you are all engaged together, and you are the youngest and marrying the man of least consequence."

Kitty jumped to her feet. "Of least consequence! Least consequence, you say? How can you possibly say that? How dare you demean yourself in that way? I told you before I would not have it, and I meant it! You will cease saying those things immediately."

Bingley threw back his head and laughed. "This is much better! That is the Kitty who is so very dear to me." Though she protested, he pulled her close to wrap his arms around her. "My dear, dear Kitty."

She drank in his scent, intoxicated by the feeling of his arms around her. He truly has chosen me.

"So then tell me, dearest, what do you wish? I will be content to wait to announce our joy until after my sister's wedding, if that is still your desire. But I would be most happy to join my friends in their announcement today as well."

She pressed in close, relishing the strength of his embrace. I do not know what to expect from Mama. But it has been such fun to plan with Louisa, even though the date of her wedding is not even set yet. I would love to share this with my sisters, and if we wait, it is possible that they will no longer be here with me when it is time to plan our day. I most certainly do not want to only have Lyddie to help me prepare. She is never happy unless she is the center of attention. I can only imagine what it would be like living with her then. And if she is not here, then I will do all my planning alone.

Bingley saw the sadness in her eyes. "What is wrong?" He kissed for forehead tenderly.

"I was just considering what you have asked." She drew a deep breath and straightened herself. "I still want to wait to marry until Louisa and Mr. Hurst have wed. But there is too much joy in the preparing, and I wish to share that with her and my sisters." Tears suddenly filled her eyes. "I fear attending to all those details without them would leave me feeling quite bereft."

He cried out joyfully and grabbed her about the waist, spinning her in his arms. Setting her back on her feet, he kissed her firmly. "Now I will race you back to Netherfield to share our news!" He dashed away with Kitty pounding after him a moment later, both laughing joyfully all the way.