22. Maybe It's Everything We're Dreaming Of
I am beyond words from the response from the last chapter. You guys don't even know how happy that makes me. I had that proposal in mind before I even started this story. I've had the idea for it ever since episode 1x06 of Chicago P.D. So, again thank you so much. I hope that you guys continue to read and review this story. This chapter is an "M" so read at your own risk.
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If this is what people talk about when they feel like time is frozen, then Erin Lindsay was having one of those moments. Was this really happening to her? She couldn't believe that this man who was knelt before her had just asked her to be his wife. Erin held Jay's gaze, his blue eyes radiated love as he stared up at her from his bended knee. Erin knew if her life ended tonight, that she without a doubt knew what it meant to truly feel loved.
"Yes" Erin whispered a tear sliding down her cheek.
Jay exhaled a breath that he didn't even know that he'd been holding. "Yes? You said yes?"
Erin quickly nodded as the tears fell freely from her hazel eyes. "Yeah. Yes, of course"
"Thank God" Jay smiled wide and he slipped his mother's ring onto Erin's finger and he stood up and lowered his lips to hers.
Erin pulled back from the kiss and kissed a line down Jay's stubbled jaw as he pulled her into a hug. "I love you"
Jay tightened his grip around Erin as those three words left her lips. "I love you, too. I'm going to make you so happy, Erin"
Erin pulled back and looked at him. Her eyes shining with unshed tears "You already do. So happy. You saved me. Saved me from it all"
Jay raised his hand to Erin's cheek and wiped the stray tear that escaped away. "You saved yourself. I was just there to remind you that you could do it"
Erin exhaled deeply and ran her hands from Jay's shoulders down to his chest. The ring on her hand catching the light and sparkling. Erin smiled as her gaze caught it and she studied it for a few seconds before looking up at Jay. "We're engaged"
Jay laughed softly and brushed Erin's hair across her forehead "That we are, baby girl"
Erin's gaze held Jay's as she laughed softly. "You know that Hank's going to kill us"
Jay shrugged his shoulders "He already knows"
Erin pulled back and looked down at her ring and then at Jay. "How?"
"I asked him" Jay said with a shrug.
"What?" Erin said she stepped out of Jay's embrace, not believeing what she was hearing.
Jay took a step towards Erin and pulled her back to him. "Just what I said. I asked Hank if he'd give me his blessing to marry you. Surprisingly it went well. He mellowed out after that heart attack"
"Why would you ask him?" Erin asked tilting her eyes up to Jay's.
Jay furrowed his brow as he thought for a moment. "Because, I know how much he means to you. I know you probably seek his approval more so than you care to admit. I mean I was glad that there were a lot of witnesses and if we wake up tomorrow and I'm missing tell the cops to search the lake. But he didn't fight me on it. I think he's finally accepted that this is real"
Erin ran her hands up Jay's sport coat and she tilted her head to the side as she spoke "You know, if it wasn't for you. I don't know how I'd have made it through the past five months. We both know, I'd have died on that ship if you hadn't given me CPR to keep me alive"
Jay shook his head at the memory. The image of Erin's lifeless body laying under him as he tried to revive her filled his mind. He'd never seen a person lose so much blood and live. Even Erin's doctors were at a loss for words over her recovery. She was his answered prayer, his living and breathing miracle. "We don't need to talk about that"
Erin nodded she felt a sudden wave of guilt in knowing she'd probably just ruined their night. "I'm sorry"
Jay placed his hand under Erin's chin and tilted her head up to look at him. "That was by far the worst night of my life. I've been to war and I've slept outside while bullets fired overhead, I've seen men and women fall dead in front of me. But you...you laying on that bed, on that ship, dying under my hands and knowing there was nothing...nothing...that I could do was the worst moment of my life. Watching those beautiful eyes looking up at me and then falling closed. I didn't think pain like that existed. The thought of having to spend my life without you...that's no life at all"
Erin looked at Jay, his blue eyes clouded with tears as he spoke to her. She hadn't thought about how that night had affected him. Everyone had been so focused on her and her recovery the last few months that nobody really stopped to think about how that night had impacted her partner.
Erin ran her hands down Jay's shoulders and pushed his sport coat off of his shoulders. "I know that night was hard for you, but it's because of you that I'm standing here right now. It's because of you that I get to spend the rest of my life with you. I get to be your wife, give you babies, grow old with you. You gave me a future and it lies with you"
Jay slipped his sports coat off and draped it over the chair sitting on the balcony of their hotel room. Before pulling Erin back into his arms and kissing her temple.
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"Have I told you how incredibly beautiful you look tonight," Jay murmured against her temple and Erin smiled and looked up at him.
"Only tonight huh?"
"Well you're always beautiful." He brushed his lips against hers softly. "But tonight especially. The way you look in that dress has been making me want to tear if from your body all night."
"Well, it doesn't fit me quite a well as it did before," Erin sighed referring to her weight loss.
Jay lifted his finger to her chin and tilted her face up to look at him. "Er, feel this." He pressed his lower body against her, letting her feel his arousal as it strained against the fabric of his pants. Erin's eyes fell closed as she pressed against him. "You could wear a potato sack and you'd still be the most breathtakingly beautiful woman I've ever known."
Erin's head lolled backward and her mouth opened in anticipation of the kiss she knew was coming. Jay grinned, loving the effect he had on her and he took her invitation and covered her mouth with his lips. He slid his tongue into her warm cavern and let it explore the familiar territory. He'd kissed her so much over the last few months that he knew every inch of her. But still he seemed to discover something new about her each time he kissed her.
Erin slid her arms up around his neck and she pressed her body even closer to him as their lips gently caressed as they both took soft nips of each other. Jay's hands slid down her back and he took the soft globes of her ass in his hands and squeezed them.
Erin slid her hands into his hair and her fingers gently massaged his scalp as he pulled his lips away from hers and nibbled a soft path across her jaw to her neck. His tongue slipped between his lips and he swirled it softly over the sensitive skin below her ear, making her body shudder in his arms.
"Jay," she sighed his name into the warm night air as her head lolled backwards again. Jay took the soft lobe of her ear between his teeth and bit gently before his tongue traced the rim of her ear. One of Erin's hands slid out of his hair and down the front of his body, down his chest and over stomach, making the muscles tighten beneath her fingertips as she continued her path toward her ultimate destination.
Jay turned their bodies and guided her backwards toward the door to go to the room but he stopped dead in his tracks when she cupped him through his pants and gave him a gentle squeeze.
"Erin," he groaned against her neck where he was sucking on the warm skin over her pulse. He pulled his lips away and lifted his head to look down at her, his normally bright blue eyes now so dark with desire that they were almost black.
"I don't want to go in there" she whispered as she lifted her head, her eyes also dark and filled with the passion and love she felt for him.
Jay growled as he released her abruptly and she stumbled slightly as he disappeared into the room. She lifted her hand to her chest and placed it over her rapidly beating heart. How was it after everything, after all this time of being together, he could still make her feel so out of control, like it was the first time every time they kissed or touched. Just a look from him could send her heart racing so rapidly that she was sure it would burst right out of her chest. Just a simple touch could send a rush of arousal straight to her core in seconds and make her knees so weak she was surprised she didnt collapse to the floor. His kiss still took her breath away and left her wanton and willing to do anything he wanted and she knew, without a doubt, it always would.
Jay reappeared from the room with two pillows and two blankets and he pulled her into his available arm, guiding her out of eye view of their balcony. His lips captured hers in a hungry, demanding kiss and she willingly allowed his tongue to plunder her mouth.
Jay pulled his lips away and then released her again as he quickly laid one blanket down on the balcony, dropping the pillows at one end and the other blanket at the other. He turned to face her again and pulled her into his arms, bending his face to nuzzle her neck softly as he willed his body to slow down and savor their time alone. As much as his body wanted to throw her down on the ground and mount her like a stallion, his mind and his heart and his soul wanted to love her slowly and gently and completely.
"God, I love you, Erin" he murmured against her skin as he cupped her breast in his palm, kneading the soft flesh lovingly as his thumb and forefinger tweaked her nipple gently.
Erin closed her eyes again and took his earlobe between her lips, sucking on the soft skin as the warm breath exiting her nose as she breathed tickled his ear canal. "I love you too. Jay"
Jay lifted his head and smirked at her. She cocked her head to the side as she wondered why he'd stopped doing what he was doing. "What?" she asked softly as her hands fumbled with his belt.
"Well, two things, I don't know what I ever did to get so damn lucky. Second, I must be doing something seriously wrong here Lindsay because you shouldn't be able to form a coherent thought when I-"
He stopped mid sentence as her hand slid into the front of his boxer shorts and her fingers wrapped around his throbbing shaft. How the hell did she manage that without him noticing, he wondered as his eyes closed of their own volition and his fingers flexed around her breast.
"Erin," he moaned and she leaned forward and ran her tongue along the hollow of his throat.
"You weren't doing anything wrong, Halstead. In fact you were well on your way to doing something very right." Erin tugged on his shaft softly before she removed her hand from his boxers. Jay blinked his crossed eyes and looked down at her. "And you are pretty damn lucky, Halstead," she murmured as she reached up and cupped his face in her palms and then brushed her lips softly against his.
He pulled her into his arms again and sank into the kiss, giving up any and all restraint he might have had left. He didn't want to have any restraint with her. He wanted to lose himself inside her and not know where he ended and she began.
He turned her and helped her to sit down on the blanket before he dropped to his knees in front of her. "I love you," he whispered against her lips as he kissed her and urged her onto her back. She leaned back against the pillows and let her thighs fall open as he knelt between them. He deepened the kiss as he leaned over her, letting his body press her against the hard wood of the deck.
"Jay," she sighed into his mouth as he braced himself on one hand over her and the other traveled up the outside of her thigh, softly caressing her skin through the thin material of her pantyhose. He pressed his arousal against her core and he could feel the heat coming from her body through the layers of clothes between them. Erin bucked her hips softly and he moaned into her mouth as his hand again started kneading the soft flesh of her breast.
Jay's lips softly nibbled a heated path over her chin and down her throat as his tongue traced her pulse. He dipped his tongue into the hollow of her throat as her nails scraped down his back over the soft cotton of his shirt. Her hands reached his butt and she grasped him in her hands and pulled him tighter against her causing a guttural groan to escape his lips.
Jay pulled away and sat back on his calves, looking down at the woman lying in front of him. Her skin was flushed, her eyes were glazed, her chest was heaving and she was, without a doubt, the most beautiful woman he'd ever known. There were times, still to this day, that he had to pinch himself to believe that she was his girl, that she really loved him and intended to spend the rest of her life with him. She'd given him love he never felt he deserved, and she'd one day give him a family he never thought he'd have.
His fingers trailed softly along the soft skin of her thighs, dipping beneath the hem of her dress, pushing it higher. He bypassed her core and reached the waistband of her pantyhose and tugged, pulling her lace panties along with them. He scooted backwards and pulled the soft material down her legs, removing her shoes and then divesting her of both items. Her thighs fell open again and the soft scent of her arousal wafted upward, filling his nostrils and he sighed as his fingers tenderly caressed the soft skin of her inner thighs.
Erin sat up and reached behind her body, tugging at the zipper that helped keep the dress on her body. The material loosened around her shoulders and she let it slip down the front of her body, revealing her lace-encased breasts to his heated gaze. Without a word, Jay leaned forward and captured her lips in a deep kiss as his hands lifted and massaged the soft round globes through the lace material, his thumbs sweeping over her nipples softly, making her body shudder.
Erin wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him down with her as she lay back on the blanket. He settled between her thighs again and Erin slid one hand down his chest and into the front of his boxers again, gripping his hard, smooth shaft in her hand. Jay continued to plunder her mouth with his tongue as his index finger dipped beneath her bra and he flicked his finger against her nipple.
She moaned into his mouth and tugged on his shaft in response and Jay's lips pulled away from hers and started their descent down her body. He took mouthfuls of her soft skin as he made his way over her neck, sucking on her pulse again before his tongue slipped between his lips and swirled against the warm delicate skin that created the soft swell of her breasts.
His deft fingers pulled at the clasp nestled in the center and he released it, her breasts spilling free and filling his eager hands. He massaged and kneaded them and Erin arched her back, silently begging him to take her into his mouth. Without giving her what she wanted, Jay kissed a soft path across the valley between her breasts to the other one and treated it to the same loving torture.
Erin sped up the motion of her hand on him and squeezed his hot, hard flesh in response, telling him without words that she wasnt happy with his teasing. She swept her thumb over the blunt head, eliciting a deep groan from the depths of his chest just as his mouth closed around her nipple.
"Jay", Erin whimpered softly and she pressed his face against her breast, as his teeth and tongue pleasured her, nibbling the sensitive tip and then soothing it with the pad of his tongue.
Jays hand slid down the side of her body and his fingers speared through her, already moist from her desire. His fingers stopped briefly at the swollen bundle of nerves just at the base of her thighs and he flicked his fingertip against the tip of it, making her hips buck as she cried out softly into the night. His fingers then continued their descent until they reached her folds, dipping into her wet, warm, body, first one and then a second until they were buried all the way up to his knuckles.
Erins hips arched off the blanket and she released him as he plunged his fingers in and out of her welcoming body, her velvet walls tightening around them, gripping them and trying desperately to keep them trapped inside her.
"God, Erin", Jay groaned against her
Erin pulled her hand out of his boxers and guided his head to her other nipple and he devoured it hungrily as his thumb pressed against her clit, making small circles over the tender nub as his fingers continued to plunge inside her.
He felt her walls beginning to throb around his fingers and Erin cried out softly as her orgasm rolled over her, slowly consuming her entire body and she trembled as she tightened her thighs around his hand. Jay released her nipple and she pulled his head up, pulling his lips to hers and sucking his tongue into her mouth.
Jay slowed the pace of his fingers and urged her body to calm and their kisses softened until they were just barely taking gentle sips of each other. Erins body continued to jerk softly beneath him until he removed his fingers and lifted the drenched digits to his mouth where he licked them clean, one by one.
"I think you still have too many clothes on", Erin murmured softly as her fingers reached for the hem of his shirt, pushing it up his torso. Jay sat up and pulled his shirt over his head as Erin removed her bra and pushed her dress over her hips and down her body, tossing it softly to the side.
Jay removed his shoes and slid his pants and boxers down his legs, freeing his aching cock to the cool night air and it twitched softly. Erin took him in her palm and pushed him onto his back on the blanket. She leaned over and swept her tongue over his tip and scooped up the smooth silky liquid pooling there.
"Baby", Jay hissed as she engulfed him in her warm mouth and he slid his fingers into the long silky strands of her hair. He clenched his fingers and groaned as he fought the urge to thrust his cock deep in her throat.
Erin slid her tongue along the vein on the underside and Jay's legs trembled. He could feel his balls tightening and he tugged gently on her hair. "Erin, baby, please stop," he begged her with a strangled moan and she released him with a soft plop, placing a soft kiss on his tip before she kissed her way over his stomach. She climbed over him and rested her knees on either side of his hips, trapping his cock between their bodies, her heat bathing his shaft as she slid along him.
Jay slid his fingers in her hair and pulled her mouth to his, swiftly flipping them over in one swift motion. He settled between her thighs as his tongue dueled with hers, seeking out the softness and sweetness that her mouth provided. Erin wrapped her arms around him and raked her short nails down his back as his tip slid between her moist folds.
"I love you," she sighed into his mouth as he slowly slid into her depths. Jay held still as her body adjusted to him and he showered her face with soft kisses as he whispered his love to her.
Finally, when he could take it no longer, he pulled back out slowly, only to thrust deeply inside her again and she lifted her legs and wrapped them around his waist as they quickly fell into a frantic rhythm. Jay buried his face in her neck and nibbled and sucked the soft skin as he plunged his cock into her over and over again.
He grunted as he focused every ounce of strength he had bringing her to climax and he slid his hand between then, pressing the pads of his fingers against her clit. The added friction caused her to cry out as her body climbed closer and closer to completion.
"Jay," she chanted his name over and over as her body shook from the force of his thrusts, the tips of her nipples grazing his chest each time he slammed into her. She dug her fingernails into his skin at the base of his spine and attempted to pull him deeper as Jay slid his hands around her body. He slid them under her lower back and then down to grasp her ass in his palms, holding her body steady against his powerful thrusts.
He felt her walls begin to throb around him and she tightened her thighs, her eyes falling closed and her mouth forming a small "o" as her orgasm slowly took hold of her entire being. It rolled over her in waves and she gasped for air and her body shook from the force of it.
Jay lifted his head from her neck and looked down at her face, bathed in the moonlight, watching her as the pleasure washed over her. He fought his impending orgasm, denying the release his body so desperately wanted and he waited for her to open her eyes again.
"Erin, please open your eyes," he begged through clenched teeth. "I want to see your eyes."
Erin's eyes opened and they were glazed and fluttering as her body continued to jerk with the after effects of her climax. Jay groaned and he covered her lips with his, as his cock exploded inside her, pulsing his essence into her in three strong spurts. He collapsed on top of her, the weight of his spent body, crushing her beneath him but she only tightened her arms around him, never wanting to let him go.
Erin whimpered softly into his mouth as they continued to kiss, first frantically and then more softly as their bodies calmed and the sweat on their skin dried. Jay continued to thrust gently inside her as the last of the tremors inside her milked him of everything he had to offer her.
Finally she loosened her thighs and let her legs drop onto the blanket, her body too weak to move. Jay shivered softly and Erin slid her hands up and down his bare back. She pulled her lips away from his and opened her eyes again, looking up at the man who was her life.
"Best. Night. Ever" Erin sighed breathlessly as Jay smiled down at her and dropped his head to kiss her before rolling off of her. He reached down and grabbed the blanket by his feet and brought it up to cover them both up.
Erin curled into Jay and shivered at the cool air on her bare skin. Jay wrapped his arm around Erin and rubbed his hand up and down her shoulder.
The two laid in silence for a few minutes. Erin's arm draped over Jay's chest as he ran his hand in a pattern up and down her back. His other arm folded behind his head. He could feel Erin's body starting to relax against him and he knew she was starting to drift off.
"Erin? Babe, let's go to bed" Jay whispered.
"Let's stay here" Erin curled deeper into Jay and snuggled her head under his chin.
Jay laughed softly to himself and twisted his head to kiss the top of Erin's head as he breathed in the soft sent of her shampoo. "As much as I'd like that, I don't really think it's the best idea"
Erin sighed and moved to sit up holding the blanket against her bare chest. She felt Jay move up beside her and kiss her shoulder. Erin turned her head and smiled at him before leaning over to kiss him. Her left hand coming up to rest on his chin.
Jay pulled away from the kiss and brought his hand up to run through Erin's tousled hair. He felt Erin drop her hand from his chin and he looked down at his mother's ring on her hand and smiled.
"That ring looks good on you, Erin Lindsay" Jay said placing another kiss on Erin's bare shoulder.
Erin looked down at her hand and then back at Jay. "You look good on me"
Jay smiled and raised an eyebrow before leaning back over and kissing her. Erin's laughter filled the night air as Jay's stubbled jaw kissed her neck and pressed her back down onto the balcony ground.
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Thoughts? I'm going to try to get another update posted later today. Since it's my day off from work. If not later today than tomorrow. Because I already have it started.