Missing him

I also focused on my food..

After eating I tried to call him..

But the answer was still same not reachable..gosh.. what the hell is wrong..ok I accept that I should not have talked like that but it doesn't mean he will leave like this....

"Ava...what happened.?"may asked me..there was clear sign of stress my face..

"Nothing may... it's just..." I was saying

"It's just you are worried about him...and missing him... I'm I right baby girl??"may said.

"Yes... I'm really sorry for what happened last night but may... atleast try to think about my state my mind... yesterday I was alone there and no one recieved my call .. I was walking on road like if I'm homeless..gosh that really freaked me out and I was angry because I didn't wanted him to be with her..." I said.

"Why??"she asked "what's the problem if he spent some time with her ..and anyways he was helping her..it was not like he was enjoying time with her ava..."

"Yeah..but I was not in state of mind to stay calm and understand everything.. I Just was Full of rage that I was thinking about on whom should I trow all my anger..and king was the reason for that all although it was not really his fault."I said.

May was hearing everything I Said...

"Calm down...what can we do now?? nothing..just watch TV or sleep."She suggested.

"No... I can't.. where is this man.??"I said in stressed tone.

"Ava... "may said.

"Yeah..." I was looking at her waiting for what she wanted to say...

"I think... I mean I feel like king is more important to you than mark... I have never seen you this much worried about someone.."she said.

Oh..she is saying truth...

By her words may was saying that I worry about king.. more than anyone else..

Does she is thinking about I like him..or love him.. something like that... she was looking at me.. with smile.

"No..may it's not like that..."I said while avoiding eye contact and sat on sofa..

She came and sat beside me.

"Ava... don't worry..he was your bodyguard..he can protect himself.. don't worry about him...

And to say the truth now he is gone..."she said.

Her words made my heart feel pain.

He is gone??no.. where.. I didn't had any idea just questions In my mind.

I looked at her..

She nodded.."he is gone..."she said..." focus on your life.. it's ok ava..some people just come and go . we really don't have control on our life sometimes.. don't worry.. your new bodyguard will be here soon.."and she went inside kitchen.

What..?

New bodyguard will be here soon..

But I don't want new bodyguard..

I want my king back here..

God..why this always me?why no one can feel bad for me..

Look at that stupid king now..he didn't even though for a second that I need care and comfort.. because what happened yesterday I was sad...

But no,no one cares about that..

Just because I throw my anger.. he left..

Didn't even though about talking with me..

He really never cared about me..

I was sitting like if I have lost everything...

Shit... I'm going to miss him more because I don't have anything to do..

Hell...what should I do.

I think I should go to parents house..to take rest..

I called my mom..

"Baby... how are you.."my mom's voice made me feel good...

"Mumma... I'm coming tomorrow.." I said.. I don't know why tears came in my eyes..

Maybe I'm too tired handling Everyone's hate and my mom's Caring voice made me feel better and all my control over my tears was lost.

"Aww... really??"she said with happiness.."babe we are waiting..come soon."mom Said.

After talking I came back to my room.

And slept...

In evening I went out for some shopping...

There was so many people..

So many stuff..

But still I was not feeling good..

Yes I'm madly missing that punk..

Or maybe I'm alone here.. I wish mark was here..

But that punk was aslo very busy with his schedule...he is here still don't come to meet me.

Huh!! I'm so done thinking about all this.

Leave it..

I'm going to my parents house..

I'll back here with full energy and happiness..