19. Alone

Author's Note: Another quick update. I was hoping to have this done by the end of the week, but it happened a little sooner than expected. Enjoy!

Oh yes, and thanks once again to all of you who have reviewed, and who have offered me cookies! You all are what keeps me going with this. :)

Disclaimer: Izeebella said in her review for my last chapter that she was going to try and buy me Harry Potter for my birthday so that I don't have to have any more disclaimers in my chapters. I wonder how much JK Rowling is charging for him:P

After placing his potions book back on the table, his gaze rested upon the journal. He was dying to read more, but it just didn't feel right to him. He'd already read enough to know how she'd begun to feel about him. He didn't have any need to read any earlier entries, where she most likely complained about how much of a git he'd been to her – and not to mention, she'd probably written plenty of entries about how great Harry Potter was.

Nevertheless, he felt himself being drawn to the journal. Slowly, his hand reached out until it came into contact with the smooth cover. He was about to open it up when he heard a knock at the door.

He wondered who would be visiting him during classes, but then figured it was probably Dumbledore, coming to reprimand him for bashing in Blaise's face.

But when he opened the portrait hole, it was not Dumbledore who stood on the other side – it was Pansy.

"Pansy," he said, unable to hide his surprise. "What are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be in class?"

"Yes," she replied. "May I come in?"

"Uh, sure," he said, stepping aside to let her through.

She looked upset, as if she'd been crying. He opened his mouth to ask her what was wrong, but she beat him to it.

"Blaise is in trouble," she said. "Did he really try to poison that Granger girl?"

"He didn't try," Draco replied, "he did."

Pansy nodded. "That's what I figured. He didn't come right out and confess to me, but I could sense it. Dumbledore has him under house arrest until it's proven whether or not he intentionally poisoned her. Why would he do something like this?"

Draco shrugged. "I'm sure he had his reasons."

Pansy crossed her arms tightly over her chest and sniffled. "Well, whatever his reason was, I'm sure it was not worth getting expelled for. That was really stupid of him."

"I couldn't agree more," Draco muttered.

"He's not talking about it," Pansy continued, "but you're the one who broke his nose, aren't you?"

"That is correct."

"Well, you did a bang-up job." She paused and smiled slightly at her pun, but then her smile quickly faded as she went on: "Draco, he's angry – really angry. I think he may try to hurt her again."

Draco groaned. "What the hell is wrong with that guy?" he muttered to himself, then said, "But how can he, if he's under house arrest? He won't even be able to leave the Slytherin tower without Dumbledore knowing about it."

"Draco, you and I both know that if Blaise Zabini wants something done, he does it. And if he can't do it himself, then he'll get someone else to do it for him."

"Crabbe and Goyle," Draco said. Pansy nodded.

Draco narrowed his eyes at her. "Why are you telling me all of this? I would think you of all people would want to see Granger get hurt."

Pansy looked as though she had just been slapped in the face. "Look, Draco, I don't know how much of an evil bitch you think I am, but you obviously overestimate me. I'm the last person in the world would wish the wrath of Blaise Zabini on any girl – even Hermione Granger. Or, rather, Hermione Granger's double." She paused, and then said softly, "I'm on your side."

Draco couldn't help but scoff at that. "Oh really? Because I was unaware that I had a side."

"Well, you do," she said. "And I'm on it."

"Why? Why would you of all people be on my side?"

"Because Blaise is an evil bastard. And because -" She stopped, as if debating on whether or not to continue. "And because I care about you."

Draco was taken aback by both admissions, especially the first one. Blaise and Pansy had an on-again, off-again relationship that had started around the time of the Yule Ball. When they were "off-again", that's when Pansy would return to Draco to try and seduce him – to no avail, of course. Still, he figured she would have stuck by Blaise under the circumstances – the circumstances being that Draco was obviously not interested in her.

And as for the fact that she cared about him, well…he wasn't exactly sure why she still would.

He had no idea what to say. He wasn't used to seeing this side of Pansy.

"I've cared about you for a long time," she said. "You know that. And there was a time where I think I was actually in love with you. But you never loved me back. And it hurt, but I was okay with it, you know? Because you paid attention to me, and that's all I ever really wanted. But then…then earlier this year, you changed. At first, nobody seemed to know why. I had my suspicions, but I didn't want them to be right, so I just ignored them. But when I returned from Christmas break, I noticed even more of a change in you, and you became even more distant from us, and that's when I knew."

"Pansy," Draco interjected. He wasn't sure he wanted her to finish what she was saying.

"You were in love with Hermione Granger all along," she continued, trying desperately to hold back a sob. "I'm not dumb, Draco, nor am I blind. When I came back from break and heard about her death…I could see how much it affected you. You looked like you had lost the most important thing in your life. And I guess you had."

He wasn't about to deny it. There was no point in doing that, anyway – she would know he was lying. So he sighed and said, "You're right."

"It killed me, Draco. It killed me because part of me wanted to hate you for having loved her, but another part of me wanted to comfort you. I loathed Granger, but I never would have wished death on her. Especially if her death was going to cause you such pain. And I just want you to know that…that I'm sorry it happened. And I'm sorry that you've been going through this whole thing alone. I should have been there for you…"

"Pansy," he said again. "You don't owe me any sort of apology."

"But I do!" she exclaimed. "I've been a terrible friend to you, and you did nothing to deserve that. So I'm just letting you know now that if you ever need someone to talk to…"

Draco studied the girl standing before him. Was this the same Pansy Parkinson he had known for the past seven years? The same one who would pout and throw a tantrum when he would occasionally deny her advances? It seemed odd to him that she would be standing before him, offering him a hand in friendship. Still, he appreciated the gesture. It had been so long since he'd had a friend, and these days it would probably be nice to have someone to talk to.

"Thanks, Pansy," he said. "That means a lot to me. Now, I'd better go warn Granger."

"Oh, I've already warned her," Pansy said.

Draco's eyebrows shot up. "You warned her?"

"Yeah. I thought she should know. It went surprisingly well. I had expected her to be wary of me, but she didn't seem to be. She thanked me for telling her…though, I'm not sure if she believed me or not, so you'd better warn her, too. She'll probably listen to you more." Pansy paused for a moment, then said, "It was weird. When I approached her, she seemed to almost welcome me right off. Almost as if…I don't know, almost as if maybe I wasn't such a bitch to her in her world."

For some reason, this really didn't surprise Draco at all. This Hermione had acted the exact same way with him – and with Blaise, for that matter. In fact, she'd seemed perfectly fine around everyone but Harry Potter.

"Anyway," Pansy continued, "I'd better get going. I can't really afford to miss my next class. Take care, Draco."

Draco nodded in response as she turned to go. He glanced back down at the journal on the table and sighed. He wouldn't have enough time to read any of it right now – it would have to wait for later. Right now, he would have to go warn Granger.

Luckily, by the time he left his tower, the bell was ringing, indicating that class had just gotten over. He racked his brain, trying to remember what class Hermione would have just had. Figuring it was probably Herbology, he rushed down to Professor Sprout's classroom, hoping that Hermione was still in the vicinity. By the time he got there, most of the students were already piled out of the classroom, but when Draco glanced inside, he could see her talking to Professor Sprout.

So he leaned up against the wall, right next to the door, so that he could catch her the moment she came out.

About a minute later, she exited the classroom, and Draco immediately reached out and grabbed her arm.

"Hey!" she protested, yanking her arm away. When she saw that it was Draco that had apprehended her, she softened and said, "Oh, hey. What are you doing here? Are you feeling better?"

"Not really," he replied. "Look, Granger, you'd better come home right after classes get over."

Hermione narrowed her eyes at him. "Does this have anything to do with what Pansy warned me about?"

"It has everything do to with that. It's not safe for you to be roaming the halls by yourself when there are no professors or other students around."

"Well, I have plans tonight," she said. "Ginny invited me to go to Hogsmeade with her -"

"You're not going," Draco said.

"Actually, I am going," she said. "Don't worry, I'll be back in plenty of time to go patrolling."

"Don't make me have to follow you around, Granger."

"I'm not making you do anything!" she cried. "Why are you suddenly so concerned about my well-being, anyway?"

"Who said I was?" Draco said defensively. "But the better question here is why you aren't concerned about your well-being. Didn't Pansy tell you that Blaise might try and do something to you again?"

"Yes, she told me, but I'm not worried. I'll be with Ginny and Luna the whole time – and possibly Ron as well. I will even have them walk me back to the Heads' tower afterwards."

"You think a couple of Weasleys and Looney Lovegood will be able to protect you from anything?" he said. "They weren't able to protect our Hermione – and neither was Harry. I couldn't protect her, either. So I wouldn't be feeling so secure with them as your bodyguards, if I were you."

Hermione shook her head. "This is completely different, Malfoy, and you know it. Your Hermione was attacked by a powerful Death Eater. We're talking about a couple of boneheaded thugs who don't have an entire brain between the two of them. I think we can handle them if they try anything. We could even handle Blaise if we had to. But I can't spend the remainder of my time here in fear that someone is going to attack me, because it may not ever happen." She sighed. "Look, I appreciate your concern, but…well, I really want to hang out with them tonight. They have been so kind and welcoming to me. It feels kind of nice to have some friends."

She glanced down at the floor. Draco stared at her. She looked fragile and…well, unhappy. And judging from the tone in her voice, she wasn't happy. She sounded almost as if it had been quite awhile since she'd had a friend.

"Okay, fine," he said with a sigh. "Do whatever you'd like with them. But be back before seven, or else I'm coming to look for you."

She smiled. "You sound like my father. But okay. I'll be back by seven."

"You'd better be," he warned.

She turned on her heel and continued on down the hallway, stopping at one point to wave and say, "See you."

Draco did not respond. He just turned around and headed back to the Heads' Tower.

Hermione still had not returned. At first, Draco didn't worry because he figured that she was just running a bit late, or that she had forgotten that she was supposed to return by seven, instead of eight, like the plan had originally been. But when she had still failed to show up a few minutes after eight, he set out to look for her.

Grabbing his wand, he exited the portrait hole. Already, the hallways were empty, though the lanterns still burned brightly on the walls. Ignoring the greeting from the knight in the portrait, he set forth down the hallway with fierce determination of beating Crabbe and Goyle senseless if he were to stumble upon any sort of troubling situation along the way. He recalled the time months ago when he happened to stumble upon them attacking the real Hermione, and he remembered how angry he had been at them, and how much he'd wanted to hurt them. He prayed that history would not repeat itself.

However, he only made it down to the end of the hallway before Hermione came running around the corner, nearly crashing into him.

"Oh!" she cried out, startled. She sounded out of breath, and looked disoriented.

"Granger," he snapped. "Where the hell have you been?"

He regretted using an irate tone with her, because he was relieved to see her. But his automatic reaction was to scold her.

"I'm sorry I'm late," she said. She reached into her robes and pulled out her wand. "Are you ready to patrol?"

He stared at her in disbelief. She had completely dismissed the fact that she had been over an hour late, and figured a simple sorry would suffice. Didn't she figure he would have been concerned?

"Where were you?" he asked again.

Hermione furrowed her brow. "I…I don't know."

"You don't know?"

"Yeah, I honestly have no idea."

Draco snorted. "If you're going to lie, Granger, then at least make something up. A simple 'I don't know' just doesn't cut it."

"I don't know, okay?" she said loudly. There was genuine frustration in her voice. "The last thing I remember was coming back here, then realizing that I'd left one of my notebooks back at the Gryffindor common room, so I started to go back and..." her voice trailed off.

"And what?" He looked down at her hands, which were both empty, save her wand. "Where is the notebook?"

"I-I don't think I ever made it back there."

Now Draco was feeling frustrated. "You don't think? Granger, what the hell is wrong with you?"

"I don't know!" she sobbed. "I must have blacked out or something. I just all of a sudden found myself standing in one of the hallways on the seventh floor, near the Gryffindor tower. But I was so freaked out that I couldn't remember anything, and I knew I was late meeting you, so I just ran back here as quickly as I could."

Draco couldn't tell whether or not she was lying, but she was very convincing – she seemed genuinely confused. Maybe she had come into contact with Crabbe and Goyle, and they had done something to her and had covered it up with some sort of befuddlement draught. But that was unlikely. If they had done something to her, they would have wanted her to remember it.

"Are you okay?" he asked. "I mean, do you think it was possible that -"

"That someone attacked me and I just forgot?" Hermione finished for him. "No, not really. I feel fine, just a bit confused. I probably just passed out or something."

"Should we go see Madame Pomfrey?"

"Nah," she said. She dried her eyes quickly with a shaky hand. "I'll be fine. I'm just so sorry that I'm late. I hope you didn't worry."

"Not at all," Draco lied.

For the next couple of hours, they patrolled – mostly in silence, although they did address the whole issue of Hermione losing her Potions partner. Draco assured her that she would have a potion to pass in the next week, even if he had to make it for her himself. After their conversation, he made a mental note to find Harry the next day so they could start their potion.

Of course, Harry would probably rebuff him, due to the fact that he still hadn't had "the talk" with Hermione. But in Draco's defense, since Harry had given him the ultimatum the day before, Hermione had nearly died, and then she'd been off with friends. That hadn't left him a whole lot of time to talk with her. Granted, patrolling would have been the perfect opportunity to spark up a conversation, but she still seemed upset over her lack of memory, so he decided not to bother her.

So once again, he would have to put it off.

When they returned to the common room later that night, Hermione glanced down at the journal on the table as she passed it on the way to her bedroom. Draco saw her give him a curious look, as if she was wondering if he'd actually read any of it. Thankfully, she did not ask him. She simply said, "Goodnight," and headed off to bed.

Resisting all urges to pick the journal up and read it, he went to bed himself.

He sighed. "We need to stop meeting like this."

"You don't want to see me anymore?" she asked with a pout.

"Of course I do," he said. "But not like this. You're not really here."

She frowned. "If I'm not really here right now, then how is it that I am talking to you? How is it that I can touch you?" She reached out to place her hand on his, but it went right through him. She stared down at her hand in confusion. "This makes no sense."

"It makes perfect sense," he said, moving away from her. "You're not here. You're not real. You're just a figment of my imagination, and I want you gone."

"No!" she cried. She took a step closer to him and reached out once again, as if to embrace him. But once again, she could not touch him. "Please don't do this. I don't want to be alone."

"Well, I don't want to be alone, either," he said. "But sometimes we are not given a choice in the matter."

She sobbed, and it broke his heart.

"Please," she pleaded. "I need you."

He shook his head. "You don't need me. I have failed you. I have failed you in so many ways, and there is nothing I can do now to help you. You need to go."

"No," she said, shaking her head. She was sobbing uncontrollably now. She didn't even notice the hooded figure that had appeared behind her.

Draco closed his eyes tightly and turned around. He wouldn't watch her die this time. Even when she screamed his name, he refused to acknowledge her. When silence soon followed, he reopened his eyes and turned back around. She was gone, as was the hooded figure. He was alone.

But then he heard the screaming. He heard the cry for help. And he awoke.

He jumped out of bed and blindly reached for his wand on the nightstand. "Lumos," he said, and the wand lit up. Now that he could see, he rushed over to his door and threw it open and headed straight for Hermione's room.

"Granger?" he called out. He turned the doorknob, but the door was locked. "Granger!" he yelled again, but there was no answer.

He pointed his wand at the door and yelled, "Alohomora!" He then proceeded to kick the door open.

He rushed inside. From what he could see with just a bit of moonlight pouring in from the window, Hermione was pinned down to the floor by what looked like a hooded figure.

"Hey!" he shouted, but the hooded figure did not react.

"Get away from her!" he cried. How the hell did someone get into their common room? And just who the hell was it?

He reached out to grab the man in the cloak, but quickly recoiled - ice had begun to form on his hand. Shaking slightly, he held out his lighted wand closer to the figure and gasped.

"What the hell?" he muttered. He was looking at a Dementor.

Hermione remained perfectly still on the floor, staring up in horror as the Dementor appeared to be sucking the life right out of her.

Without hesitation, Draco pointed his wand at the Dementor and said, with all of his might, "EXPECTO PATRONUM!"

Instantly, a bright, silvery light emerged from the tip of his wand and hit the Dementor, knocking it off of Hermione. He expected the Dementor to just fly out the window, but it didn't. Instead, some sort of portal opened up behind it, and sucked the creature right in. Once the Dementor had disappeared, it closed right back up and Draco and Hermione were left alone in the dark room.

Despite the shock he was still feeling, he managed to kneel down beside Hermione, who was now sitting up and coughing.

"What he hell," he said slowly, "was a Dementor doing in here?"

She did not answer him. She did not even look at him.

He stood up and stared down at her. He held out a hand, which she took, and he pulled her to her feet.

"That's it, Granger," he said, silently willing his heartbeat to return to normal. "You and I need to talk – right now."