80. Tough Conversations
Nicole smiled as she stared at Waverly’s eyelids twitching while her chest rose and fell in a steady rhythm. The brunette slowly opened her eyes, blinking a few times before a sleepy smile spread across her lips.
“G’morning,” Waverly said in a groggy voice and gave the cutest yawn Nicole had ever seen.
“Good morning,” Nicole replied sweetly and placed a gentle kiss on Waverly’s lips. “Did you sleep well?”
“After what we did last night, I slept like a baby.” Waverly chuckled softly. “How did you sleep?”
“I always sleep well when I’ve got you in my arms.” The corners of Nicole’s mouth rose up and she leaned in to kiss Waverly again, which Waverly happily accepted.
“You’re such a sweet talker in the morning.”
“I read it helps raise your chances of getting laid.” Nicole shrugged, and laughed when Waverly let out a shocked gasp, which was fake of course.
“Thanks to these hormones you’re getting laid whether you want it or not.”
“Good thing I always want it,” Nicole smirked, and this time Waverly was the one who had initiated the kiss. She then sat up into a sitting position, leaning her back against the headboard as Nicole did the same.
“What time are you meeting up with your dad?” Waverly asked.
“Around noon.”
“How do you think he’ll take the news?”
Nicole let out a heavy breath as she looked down at the sheets. “I really don’t know. He’s more supportive of us than he ever was before, but he’s always been pretty old-fashioned when it comes to kids and reproduction.” She looked up at Waverly with sad eyes. “I just hope he accepts the baby as mine too, even though they won’t have my DNA.”
A small smile formed on Waverly’s face as she ran her fingers through Nicole’s hair. “Me too. But no matter what he says, you know this baby is 50% you, right? Screw DNA.”
“Yeah, I know,” Nicole nodded. “But I want them to get to know their only grandparent, and that would be difficult to do if he doesn’t think of himself as their grandfather.”
“I’m sure he’ll be happy for us baby. Don’t assume the worst just yet.”
Nicole gave a short laugh. “Do you know me? I always expect the worst.”
“True,” Waverly nodded. “But try not to this time.” She smiled as she swung her legs over the bed to go to the bathroom. When she slowly stood up, she felt a strong ache between her legs and immediately winced in pain.
“Are you okay?” Nicole asked in concern.
Waverly waved her hand as a gesture of letting Nicole know not to worry. “I’m just a little sore from last night.”
Nicole quickly sat up. “Was I too rough? Did I hurt you? The baby’s okay, right?” She felt the panic quickly building.
“No no, it was perfect. You were perfect.” Waverly smiled reassuringly as she sat back down on the bed and reached out for Nicole’s hand. “And you’re really cute when you worry about the baby.”
“I worry about both of you constantly, you just don’t always know it.” She rubbed her thumb against the soft skin on the back of Waverly’s hand.
“No I know it. Your worry lines give it away.”
Nicole’s eyebrows drew together in concern. “I have worry lines? Where?” She reached up to feel around her face.
With a small laugh, Waverly leaned down and kissed Nicole on the nose. “So cute,” she said before walking off to the bathroom.
Nicole continued to furrow her brow and feel around her face as she watched Waverly shut the bathroom door behind her. “Wait, you didn’t answer my question!”
---
Nicole followed her dad through the living room and into the kitchen of his small ranch style house that he shared with his new wife. It wasn’t her first time being there, but it was her first time being there with Sheila’s stuff all moved in. She eyed the new knick-knacks that she’d never seen before and took in the newly decorated house while comparing it to the way it had been before.
“Would you like some tea? I just made a new pot,” Nathan asked with a smile on his face – something Nicole didn’t see very often. He just wasn’t the smiling type of guy, but lately it seemed that he had been.
While looking at her dad with confused eyes, Nicole furrowed her brow. “Tea? Since when do you drink tea?”
He laughed while taking out a couple of mugs, knowing that if Nicole didn’t want any she would’ve said no, which meant that her answer was yes. “Sheila’s gotten me into it. She’s been slowly weaning me off of coffee.”
Nicole nodded as she took the warm mug with a smile of appreciation. “So, how is married life with Sheila?”
“We have our ups and downs,” he shrugged. “She can be very stubborn.”
“As can you,” Nicole added pointedly, and he chuckled while nodding his head.
“As can I, you’re right. We butt heads a lot, but in the end it always seems to make our relationship stronger as we strive for compassion and understanding.”
“That’s how a marriage should be. Nobody trying to win arguments, but rather understanding one another and building a life around those compromises.”
He smiled at his daughter. “When did you get so wise, huh?”
“Around 28 I believe,” Nicole replied with a small laugh.
They sipped their tea in silence for a few moments before Nathan asked, “So how are things with Waverly?”
Nicole shifted slightly in her chair as she prepared to deliver the big news. “Actually, we’re doing great. Best we’ve ever been.”
“That’s excellent,” he said with genuine happiness as he raised his mug up to his mouth to take a sip of his tea.
“Yeah.” Nicole nodded as her smile slowly grew wider. “Actually, we’ve got some news.”
He set his tea down as he looked at her curiously, waiting to hear what the news was.
“We’re going to have a baby,” she said with a heavy breath of excitement, and she was now full-on grinning.
Nathan’s eyes widened and he exhaled quickly out of his mouth in shock; but good shock nonetheless if his smile was any indication. “Nicole! That’s—I can’t even believe it. I’m going to be a grandfather!”
“You are!” Nicole nodded, relieved that her father was on board with the whole thing.
He looked down at her stomach before flitting his eyes back up to hers. “Well, tell me. How far along are you?”
Nicole’s smile dropped a bit when she realized he had misunderstood the situation, which wasn’t his fault. It made sense that he didn’t remember that she couldn’t carry children since she had only mentioned it once briefly a few years ago when they had just started getting to know each other again. It wasn’t even a full conversation, but rather something she said in passing when she was talking about the accident. He probably didn’t even hear her when she said it, or he didn’t understand correctly.
“No, um, I’m not pregnant. Waverly is. I can’t get pregnant, remember? Because of the surgery I had a few years ago?”
His smile dropped completely and he stared at her blankly, like someone who had just had been handed an amazing gift that was quickly taken away. “Oh,” he said softly. Nicole winced at how loudly she could hear him swallow. “So, is it okay to ask how all of that works? You know, without a…” He waved his hand around in random motions as he tried to think of a way to word his question without being so blunt. “Without a man involved?”
“Well there is a man involved, he’s just not involved.”
Her dad drew his eyebrows together and slowly shook his head. “I don’t understand.”
“We used an anonymous sperm donor. We know about their history, but not who they are.”
“So the kid will never know who his or her father is?”
Nicole clenched her jaw. “They won’t have a father, they’ll have two mothers. But if they want to know where they came from, when they turn 18 they can contact the cryobank to find out information and possibly make contact with the donor if that’s what they want.”
He nodded as he took in the information. “So none of this child comes from you then. They won’t have any of your DNA?”
She was beginning to feel the frustration building up inside her, and she wasn’t going to tiptoe around the situation for his sake. “Blood doesn’t make someone family. I learned that pretty quickly after you and mom shunned me and I was forced to make my own family.”
He licked his lips and shook his head. “How many times are you going to make me apologize for that?”
“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize I was forcing you to feel sorry about it.”
He sighed. “You’re not. I do feel sorry about it, but I can’t change the past, Nicole. I can’t undo what’s been done. All I can do is be a better father to you now.”
“Yeah, and you’re doing a great job,” she said sarcastically.
“Hey!” He shouted as he slammed his hand down on the table, causing their ceramic mugs to clink against the wooden table. He had gained much more control of his temper over the past few years, but he still got pretty hotheaded in certain situations. “I’ve grown as a man. I’ve worked hard to gain your trust back and to be supportive of you. I learned to accept your relationship to the point where I even went to pride day with you. I call Waverly my daughter. I’m not the man I used to be, I’ve changed and you know that. That’s why I moved here, because we’ve gotten closer over the years and you’re the most important person in my life. And yeah, I’m disappointed that my lineage stops with you. That my DNA won’t be carried on any longer. But that’s a normal reaction, isn’t it? Aren’t I allowed to be disappointed about that?”
Nicole just looked at him in silence, suddenly feeling like she may have been asking too much of him.
He took in a deep breath as he continued in a much calmer tone, “You’re my daughter and I love you. And I wish I could be as excited for you as you are right now, but it’s going to take me some time to process. I’m an old-fashioned man, that’s how I’ve always been. And you’re constantly showing me how things are different these days and I need some time to catch up.”
“I just don’t want you to see our child as someone who isn’t a part of your family. I want them to get to know their grandfather, and if you don’t see yourself as that just because they don’t have your DNA, then that would really suck.”
“I don’t think that at all,” he shook his head. “I know this baby is going to be my grandson or granddaughter, and I’m going to love them no matter what. I’m also going to teach them how to fish.” The corners of his mouth raised up slightly in a subtle smile as he winked.
“I hope you teach them better than the way you taught me,” Nicole teased.
“Hey, now what was wrong with the way I taught you?”
“We never caught any fish!” She cackled at the memory of her dad stomping back to the truck in frustration.
He pointed a finger at her as he smiled in amusement. “I still blame you for that.”
“You’re seriously going to blame a five-year-old for not catching any fish?”
“Well if you had just done as I said we wouldn’t have had any trouble catching any fish.”
She quickly shook her head in disagreement. “You’re never going to accept responsibility for that one, are you.”
“And ruin my reputation as an excellent fisherman? Not a chance in hell.” He smiled as he sipped on his tea some more, and Nicole copied him with a shake of her head, thankful that the conversation had taken such a lighthearted turn.
---
On Monday morning, Waverly stared up at the ceiling, repeatedly checking the clock as she waited for her alarm to go off. She had been doing so for the past hour and a half, but wanted to stay in her warm bed next to Nicole’s heated body for as long as possible. This always happened on the first Monday of a new semester. She’d get a little anxious the night before and have trouble falling asleep, then wake up much earlier than she needed to before proceeding to lay in bed until it was time to get up. But even though she was anxious for the newness of the new year, she was excited for it all.
As soon as the alarm went off, Waverly quickly reached over and turned it off, smiling when she felt Nicole stirring beside her as she began to wake up.
“Mmm happy first day,” Nicole mumbled with a small smile as she hugged Waverly close to her body and placed a few kisses on her neck, which was dangerous considering it was one of Waverly’s erogenous zones – something Nicole was completely aware of.
“It feels like you’re trying to keep me in this bed with you,” Waverly said before closing her eyes and letting out a slow sigh as Nicole moved up to her ear.
“Now what would give you that impression?” Nicole looked at Waverly with a mischievous smirk before leaning in for a slow kiss, one that she savored for as long as possible until Waverly pulled away.
“I really have to get up and take a shower,” she said, still smiling.
“We could shower together,” Nicole suggested.
Waverly chuckled lightly as she shook her head. “We’d end up taking way too long.”
“You sure you don’t want to?” Nicole asked in a seductive voice as she pushed down the covers, exposing Waverly’s bare torso and bringing her lips down to one of her breasts. She trailed her tongue slowly across Waverly’s nipple, smiling to herself when she heard a small moan coming from above her.
“We only have fifteen minutes.” Waverly’s hips were already moving a bit in search of contact.
Nicole sat up and pushed the covers off of her before standing up from the bed and grinned down at her wife. “That’s plenty of time.”
After they had taken their shower – which they both had to agree was a very good way to start their Monday – they finished getting ready and drank their usual morning coffee while eating a small breakfast together, just like they did every morning. They made a habit of starting the day together, even if one of them had to be up earlier than the other.
“Wait, first day of school picture for the photo album!” Nicole said as she pulled her phone out.
“Really?” Waverly sounded more amused than annoyed.
“Hey, it’s tradition.”
“It’s only my second year of teaching,” she pointed out.
“Well last year was the start of the tradition, now smile for the camera.”
Waverly smiled as she held the strap of her satchel hanging on her shoulder while Nicole snapped the picture.
“Beautiful as always,” Nicole said with a smile as she sent the picture to Wynonna. She walked Waverly out to the car – a blue SUV that they had purchased a couple of years ago, which was their first big purchase together – and opened the driver’s door for her to get in. “Hope you have an amazing first day.”
“Thank you, love.” Waverly leaned up to meet Nicole halfway to their kiss goodbye before shutting the door and driving off to work.
As soon as Waverly had walked through the double doors of the building, she closed her eyes and breathed in the familiar smell. Even though she had taught Summer classes, they weren’t in the same building that she taught in during the Fall and Spring semesters, and teaching during the Summer had an entirely different vibe. She loved seeing all of the college students and other professors on campus, and she was ecstatic to begin the new year.
After practically jogging up the stairs, Waverly rounded the corner towards the hallway where her office was and unexpectedly bumped into someone she’d never seen before. “Sorry!” She quickly apologized, and the man – who looked to be in his mid-thirties with dark black hair – held his hands up.
“No no, it was my fault.” He smiled at her as he looked over her outfit. “That pant suit really suits you, by the way.” He laughed at his own pun, and Waverly gave an awkward smile.
“Thank you. It’s the first day back and I really want to make a good impression.”
“Well I’m sure your professors will appreciate the effort.” He winked.
Waverly looked at him for a moment with her eyebrows drawn together and quickly shook her head as she rapidly blinked a few times. She wasn’t sure what she was more concerned about; the fact that he thought she was a student or that he was hitting on her with that thought in mind. “No, I’m not a student. I’m a professor. Waverly Earp.”
“Oh,” he nodded and straightened himself up. “Sorry, you just look so young.”
“Part of my youthful glow I guess.” She smiled and gave a short laugh, hoping to make the situation less awkward.
“Ah,” he nodded while smiling at her. “Well the first day of your first year is always the most memorable.”
“This is my second year,” she corrected. The patronizing tone in his voice was beginning to get on her nerves.
“Oh, I’m sorry. I’m new here and apparently I make a habit of assuming things incorrectly.” He gave a lighthearted laugh, and Waverly shook it off as he seemed to have good intentions.
“It’s no problem.”
“I’m Scott, by the way. Scott Langford.” He held out a hand, which Waverly took.
“It’s lovely to meet you, Scott.” The handshake lasted a little longer than she had wanted, which was very awkward. Especially when she tried to pull her hand out of his grasp and he kept holding on for another second before finally letting go.
“So, would you like to grab dinner sometime? Get to know each other a little better? Since we’re going to be working in the same department and all. I like to get to know my colleagues…” he trailed his eyes down Waverly’s torso before lifting them back up and giving her a charming smile, “Quite well.”
Her smile had now been wiped from her face as the interaction had shifted from cordial to borderline harassment. “Oh, I’ll bet you do Scott. Especially your female colleagues, right?”
He laughed. “Well, I am a bit of a ladies man, I’ll admit.”
“Well I’m married, so I’d prefer if we kept things strictly professional.”
“Of course, my apologies.” He nodded. “Is it unprofessional of me to say that your husband is a very lucky man?”
“Actually I have a wife.” She wanted to roll her eyes at the giddy grin that spread across his face at the realization, as she was pretty sure she knew what he was thinking about. And she hated it. It made her feel violated, like her queerness was just something to be sexualized.
“I don’t blame you. Being with a woman is quite different from being with a man. It’s much more intense.”
She quirked a questioning eyebrow. “And you know this from personal experience?”
“I may have dabbled with a few men in my lifetime. But I always come back to women.” He smirked.
She couldn’t quite put a finger on the energy he was putting out. All she knew was that he gave her a bad vibe, and usually that meant to stay away from someone. “Well, I’ve got class in 20 minutes so I’m going to go make some copies.”
“Of course. See you around, Waverly.” His smile was just getting creepy now, but maybe that was because he seemed a little creepy.
“Right. You too.” She walked past him, making sure to display the smallest smile as possible so that he would take the hint that she wasn’t interested in having any sort of friendship with him, and went straight to her office. As she pulled out her key to unlock the door, she looked over at the office right beside her with the name Scott Langford displayed on the plaque. She let out a frustrated sigh and shook her head. “Fucking hell,” she whispered underneath her breath before opening her office door and setting her satchel down on top of her desk. She had hoped to not have to run into the man all that often, but with their offices being right next to each other she knew that would be impossible. She shook all of the negative thoughts of him out of her mind as she put a bright smile on her face. She wasn’t going to let some stranger ruin her excitement about the first day of the new school year.
---
“Hey,” Nicole said as soon as Sam had gotten in the car.
“Thanks for picking me up,” Sam said softly as she buckled her seatbelt. It was obvious that she wasn’t her chipper self, understandably.
“Of course. I’m here for you, Sam.” Nicole smiled as she reached over and grabbed her best friend’s hand, holding it until Sam decided to let go.
“You sure it’s okay to take the afternoon off to come with me to the appointment? I’m not sure how long it’s going to take.”
Nicole shrugged. “I told Marsh and Ortega that I was taking an extended lunch break. Perks of being the boss,” she winked, and was happy to be able to get a laugh out of the brunette, even if it was a small one. “Besides, I trust them to watch over things without me in the office, especially Marsh. He’s really stepped it up. I’m considering promoting him to Sheriff’s Deputy.
“I think he’d be great for the job.”
“Me too,” Nicole nodded.
The two of them fell silent, and Sam finally let go of Nicole’s hand as she took in a deep breath while turning her head to look out the window. “Did you tell Waverly?”
“No, she doesn’t know anything. I haven’t told anyone.” She turned to look at Sam for a brief moment. “It’s not my secret to tell.”
Sam nodded and gave a small smile of appreciation, but the smile quickly faded. “Do you think I’m a horrible person?”
Nicole confidently shook her head. “Absolutely not. You’re just human. Life is messy and we’re all just out here trying to navigate it the best way that we can.” She pulled up into an empty parking space and put the car in park, then immediately turned to face Sam, who she could tell was on the verge of tears. “You’re an amazing person. You’re kind and genuine, and incredibly selfless, even if right now you’re feeling a little selfish. You’re my best friend, and you deserve to be happy.”
Sam’s chin quivered slightly as she nodded. “Do you think Xavier will still love me after I tell him tonight?”
Nicole let out a small breath through her nose. “I wish I could promise you that he would, but I don’t know how he’s going to react. But I can promise you that I’m going to love you, and I’m going to be here for you no matter what the outcome is.”
“Good. Because I’m really going to need my best friend.”
“And you’ve got me.” Nicole rested her hand on Sam’s leg and Sam placed her hand on top of Nicole’s while nodding. “You know, it’s okay if you want to tell him tomorrow,” Nicole said. “You should give yourself the rest of the day to relax. We can hang out and watch some of your favorite movies. You can even spend the night if you don’t want to be around Dolls tonight. We can make a slumber party out of it.”
“I think I’d really like that,” Sam said with an excited smile. “You sure Waverly won’t mind?”
“Nah. If she gets horny we’ll just sneak off for a few minutes,” Nicole teased, and laughed at the way Sam rolled her eyes at her.
“How is your sex drive so damn high? I don’t know any couple who has sex as much as you two do.”
Nicole shrugged. “Eh, it’s a gift.” She looked at her watch and noticed that it was time for them to go inside, and realized that Sam did too by the way she was letting out a heavy sigh. “Are you ready?”
Sam pursed her lips and nodded while squeezing Nicole’s hand a little tighter. “Let’s do this.”