438. Ibarras vs. Darth Vader ~Tournament Part VII E...

"We got Jake and Darwin," said Tyrone. "Where are Giorno and the Ibarras?"

"Not here," said Erina. "I don't know where they are."

"Then find them!!!" yelled Bruce, wrestling against Diana.

Miguel stares at Gabby, who is still looking away from him.

"Guys..." said Anne. "I think we're moving. I think this place is a ship. One of Stark's Helicarriers."

"Uh-huh..." said Gabby.

"Are you seriously still pissed at me!?"

"You grabbed your belt."

"What!?"

"Before you had that episode and got beat up by Rasputin... You grabbed your belt when we were arguing and I got scared."

Miguel's eyes quiver. "I'm sorry..."

Gabby slowly turns to Miguel.

"You should understand that I am so... sorry... I should never have scared you like that... Or thought that in the first place..."

Miguel had an idea and uses Hamon to electrocute his Stand-Destabilizer, breaking the device. He then whispers a spell. The cages shatter into pieces.

"Come on, guys..." said Miguel.

The four walk outside to see several dead bodies chained to the walls.

"What the hell is this place...?" asked Gabby. "Who are the women?"

"They're sex slaves," said Anne, looking at them in pity and disgust.

Miguel prays for their souls.

They enter the lab.

Miguel sees something that looks like a snow globe with space clouds within it. An interdimensional rift. "Holy shit... One of these things...Break one, and-...Bill and his army will come for us all...Why does Stark have one?"

"Because I gave it to him..." 

Bill, with his eye fully regenerated, floats into the room.

"What the hell!?" asked Anne. 

"It seems that you can see now," said Miguel. "And you're rockin' a new 3-dimensional bod, there."

"AH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!" cackled Bill. "Don't flatter me, Ibarra! I just came back through a puppet body! It's actually an Anting I'm possessing right now." Bill knocks on his skin twice. 

*CLANG!!! CLANG!!!*

"See? *snort!* Heheh! So, I can't kill aaaany of you right now. Remember the deal, bucko?" sneered Bill. "So... If it isn't the greatest royal family in all of history! Believe me! I see everything, buckaroos! Ngehehe..."

"You said you won't attack us," said Gabby.

"Wuh-!? I'm not! Gotta respect the deal, sweetie! Here's a mouth with screaming maggots in its inner lip."

A pair of lips appears as Bill snaps his fingers and it shows its inner lip with screeching maggots in it.

The four back away.

"What do you want, Bill?" asked Giorno.

"Ah... Ever since I had Mr. Perfect Cell try to kill you, you've been an annoying hindrance to my plans!"

"You fought Bill...? By yourself...?" asked Miguel.

"I struck a deal with him," sighed Giorno.

"You WHAT!?"

"It was a deal about my father."

Miguel facepalms.

"I ended up spending a long time fighting against Bill."

"You should've told us, Giovanna!"

"And get yourselves into my mess!? My mess is my responsibility, Ibarra."

"You'll regret this in the future, Giorno..."

"Okay!" laughed Bill. "So... Let's get into... B̸̘͎̯̟̰͛̍̿̑̊͛Ü̶̮̺͓̦͂̀̔̋̑͜͝S̶̖̦͓̥͂Ỉ̸̡̛̺̰̪͖̹̈́͆͝N̴̟̭͒̓̉̃̈̌̆̇͘Ȩ̷̡̞͎͚̜͐̄͌̇̉͋̚͝S̷̭̳̰͍̤͕̲͊̎̓͘Ş̶̲̄̽!!!"

Bill snaps his fingers and the quartet is placed at a dinner table with tea. "Soooo...! How was your day?"

"What do you want from us, Cipher?" asked Miguel.

"Oh, please! What does a Seraph like me want in these times...? The partnership with Stark was a bust, but at least the other guy's still kickin' to be with me!"

"What do you want... and WOULD YOU PLEASE SHUT THOSE MAGGOTS UP!!!?"

Bill rolls his eye and snaps the pair of lips away. "Alright! Alright! Geez! I want what I've always wanted! Weirdness! Horror! A bizarre world with no rules with no sense and meaning! A world where the only thing that makes sense is that it doesn't make sense! A world where the justified rule over all life itself! BizarrMAGEDDON!!!"

The word echoes into the cosmos.

"Saying that isn't very reassuring, you scalene fuck," said Anne.

"And I don't want anything from you, right now! I want something from her!" Bill points at Gabby.

"I'll never shake your hands," she said, Karate-Chopping the air.

"Well, well! If it isn't the second Messiah with special needs! I just want one thing, Gabby! Shake my hand, and I'll make your father love you with all his heart, like a true father! Not that creepy Elektra complex deal you see in porn, or whatever. Or..."

"Ew! I don't wanna hear it!"

"Okay!"

Gabby gives a worried look.

"Gabby! I already love you!" yelled Miguel.

"Oh, please! You're not even her real father, you Messianic Hobo! Well?" asked Bill.

"What's the catch?" asked Gabby.

"Gabby!" yelled Miguel.

"Don't worry! I won't ask for that rift! I'm asking you to work in a new restaurant. And unconditional love for you, sweetie!"

"No..." said Gabby. "I... love my Dad... I don't care if he loves me... I will never strike a deal with any demon just like YOU!!!"

Bill sighs. "Kinda knew you were gonna say that... You really are your father's daughter." He snaps his fingers as the door opens, revealing Vader.

"What the hell!?" asked Miguel. "How the hell are you here!?"

Suddenly, Miguel and Anne are force-choked.

"HEY!!!" yelled Giorno, blasting out Gold Experience Requiem.

"MUDA!!!"

"Oh no, you don't!" Bill easily freezes Giorno in time. "You know, gaining Eobard's abilities is quite useful, especially in situations like these! Control Y, bitches! Well...? Gabrielle Ibarra? Here's a new deal. Your freedom and you working in a restaurant that I get to choose!And I know your precious Papa can't respawn anymore since that Russian Psycho is stuck in that room for all eternity, likely! So, DEAL... OR NO DEAL!?!?"

Vader force chokes Gabby.

"Not..." said Miguel. "So... FAST!!!"

An Eldritch Whip appears and chokes Superior Darth Vader.

Bill summons a chair and some popcorn. "Aw, yeah! Some action between a bunch of nonsensical bozos!"

"C-Careful of your words, demon," said Vader, kicking Miguel and Anne away.

Anne takes out her dagger and leaps at Darth Vader's back, stabbing him over and over as Superior Darth Vader simply flicks his fingers as Anne crashes into the wall.

Vader wasn't injured at all.

He walked toward Miguel and prepared to decapitate him, but he warps out his sticks and blocks the lightsaber.

Vader tries cutting off Miguel's head, but Miguel uses his sticks to try and strike his arms, but Vader force-chokes Miguel and crashes him into the wall and the next room.

Anne throws knives into Vader's back, but Vader catches all of them with the Force and throws each at her, and she uses a broken pipe, spinning it, and blocking all of the knives.

"Vader then prepares to force-choke Miguel, but Miguel seems to be protected by some sort of barrier."

Would you please stop narrating? That's my job, Bill.

"Fine!" Bill rolled his eye.

Vader then prepares to force-choke Miguel, but Miguel seems to be protected by some sort of barrier.

"Foolish Messianic Sorceror," said Vader. "You may have been taught the ways of Holy Sorcery, yet you are no match for my power."

Vader tries decapitating Miguel's limbs, so Miguel tumbles around. 

"RAUGH!!!" Gabby throws a pipe at Vader, who dusts the pipe into pieces before it even touches him. "You're not supposed to fight, child. You're supposed to either take the deal or watch me kill your parents..."

Miguel blocks Vader's lightsaber as it inches closer to his face. Miguel, in a familiar stance to Vader's, backs away while Vader stomps toward him. "Boy..." said Miguel. "You look taller than in your movies..."

"Reference of children's media," said Vader. "You have the mind of a child, Ibarra."

"And yo mama so stupid-..."

Vader stabs Miguel in the stomach. 

"NO!!!" yelled Anne and Gabby.

"Never say anything about my mother... Ibarra..." he whispered into his ear.

Miguel grabs the saber's handle, desperately trying to pull it out.

Vader prepares to cut him in half.

"Well...?" asked Bill. "Show's over or...?"

"DEAL!!!" yelled Gabby, grabbing Bill's hand.

"Heheheheheheheh!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! AH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"

Suddenly, the four are transported back into the laboratory underneath the stadium.

"I found them!" yelled Erina, as her plane is found above them.

Meanwhile...

Back on Burnham, Earth-777, a bandaged man stayed silently on the hospital bed.

Suddenly, a syringe with Extremis 3.0 magically appears and injects the man with it, as he regenerates completely.

However, he doesn't regain his left hand, but his wounds heal.

The bandages are torn out as he floats up, revealing Superior Iron Man.

Bill sighs, appearing above him. Time stops and Superior Iron Man enters the mindscape.

"Bill! Hehehey! If it isn't my biggest bestie in the whole wide-!!!"

Bill snaps his fingers as Superior Iron Man's eyes fuse into one and become his mouth, his ears become his nose, and his mouth becomes his eyes.

"MMPH!!!" sobbed Superior Iron Man, crying while rolling on the ground, shaking in pain.

He speaks into his ear-eyes. "Yo! Tony! Can you hear me?"

"MMPH!!! MMPH!!! MMPH!!! MMPH!!!" he sobbed.

He slaps his face.

Superior Iron Man nods. "MHM!!!"

"Okay..." said Bill. "I know... I know! Right now, what you're feeling is pretty damned painful! But... Lemme remind you... You and I have struck a deal...First, I struck a deal with Toffee who wanted his true form before he betrayed me...Next, I struck a deal with Rasputin to give him the power to become an almighty Dictator by causing giving Ibarra's mother cancer...Then I helped you to have Peter kill someone so you can rule this world with the promise of me leaving you alone...But none of you MANAGED to break this GODDAMNED RIFT!!!"

Bill shows the rift in Ibarra's hands. "MY INTERDIMENSIONAL RIFT, YOU SONS OF A PACK OF BITCHES!!!All you had to do was to break it, but your egos got out of hand and in the end, NOTHING happened! How can I bring anarchy now, Stark!? NOW, IBARRA HAS IT!!!"

"Mm! Mm!"

"OF COURSE, I KNOW YOU'RE LYING!!! I SAW IT WITH MY OWN EYE!!!He has it... HIM!!! But I struck a new deal... another timeline where I could possibly win!"

"MM!!! MMMMM!!!"

"I don't CARE IF I'VE DONE IT HUNDREDS OF TIMES ALREADY!!! I'll get them all one day!!! Rick... Yurielle... Stanford... Stanley... Dipper... Mabel... Miguel Ibarra! I'll have my revenge!"

Superior Spider-Man teleports into the room, sighs, and grabs Superior Iron Man.

"Don't worry, sir... I'll help you," said Superior Spider-Man.

"MM!!!"

Bill snaps his fingers and Superior Iron Man's face goes back to normal. "You're alive because you still have use for me. Consider this 'not mercy.'Let's go, boys... I'll strike up a better deal soon.I mean, after all, we all live in the subconscious of a fat Asian virgin nerd with glasses still living with his mother in his 20s and scribbles down our stories in Wattpad and AO3."

Hey!I don't wear glasses.

"Sure thing, Nerd. All nerds wear glasses. Suck on this hat while I CARRY ON MY MISSION!!!"

Bill yells, "OW!!!" as he crashes into the wall.

Maybe you should wear glasses, too, nerd.

"Fuck you! You did that on purpose?"

A mystical piano falls on Bill.

"HEY!!! YOU'RE BREAKING THE RULES!!!"

Yeah...

Okay, okay. Fine! I'll stop!But not before Bill gets kicked in the balls.

Superior Iron Man kicks him in the area between his legs.

"AH!!!" yelled Bill. "I'LL GET YOU NEXT, AUTHOR!!!"

Nyanyanyanyanya, nya! You got kicked in the non-existent balls!

"Grrr!!!"

Meanwhile...

Bruce slowly opens his eyes to see that he's in a hospital room. He gasps. "Peter...!" He sees that Peter is happily eating Halo-Halo Mark gave him.

"Hey, Mr. Wayne! I'm eating a Filipino dessert called Halo-Halo, but it's basically just a Fruit Cocktail with Ice Cream in it and shaved ice!It has shaved ice, evaporated milk, coconut milk, condensed milk, Ube, Leche Flan, Coconut, Jackfruit, Beans, Banana, Ube Ice Cream, Jelly Pearls called Sago, nata de coco, some green jelly stuff called buko pandan, and really creamy cheddar."

Bruce sighs. "No, thanks. I just had that when I visited the Philippines a week ago for a business trip."

"I'm surprised they hadn't checked under our masks."

"Rick had their memories wiped," said Bruce. 

"Hey..." said Peter. "Mr. Wayne? Thanks for not giving up on me."

"Thanks for continuing to have faith in me," said Bruce.

Peter continues eating his Halo-Halo. "I'm sorry, Mr. Wayne... I didn't..." he went serious. "I didn't mean what i said... Saying that everyone dies on you... I really didn't mean it."

"And I'm sorry for pushing you to get closer to becoming me," said Bruce. "I guess... I'm just looking for someone to carry out my teachings... my work..."

"You already have one of those people," smiled Peter. "And I'm sorry for leaving you like John, Jason, and Tim... And Barbara... And... a lot of people did... I'm so sorry, Mr. Wayne."

"Water under the bridge, Peter," said Bruce. "And call me Bruce."

Peter smiles. "Sure thing, Bruce."

"Also, yeah. I kinda want some of that."

"BRUCE!!!" Diana crashes in and hugs Bruce along with his kids.

"PETER!!!"

"DADDY!!!"

MJ and Mayday hug Peter.

"Hey, guys..." said Peter.

"Don't hurt Uncle Bruce again," Mayday sobbed.

"I won't! I won't! We're cool now!"

Diana sighs. "How did you beat me?"

"Seduction, sweetheart," said Bruce with his stern voice. "Because I actually understood how your thoughts work..."

Earlier...

Bruce punches Diana in the face as she tries to strangle Bruce while all the heroes held her down. "DIANA!!! CALM THE FUCK DOWN!!!"

Bruce then places braces around her wrists which disables her abilities as Bruce punches Diana, knocking her out. 

"Jesus..." said Gogeta. "What a powerful woman..."

"Touch her, and I'll regenerate your tails, pull both, and shove 'em in your assholes," said Bruce.

Now...

"You had to have everyone pin me down, punched me in the face a few times, put on these artificial bracelets, and made Gogeta feel intimidated by you."

"Terrifyingly accurate," said Bruce.

"Well..." said Damian. "As long as you won't do anything stupid like that again."

"I wish I'd kill someone so you'd notice me more..." said Cassandra.

"Hey... I love you all... equally..." said Bruce.

"You didn't tell me about Kate..." said MJ.

Peter's eyes widen. "I-I-I-I-I-... Pfft-! She was... a really good friend... and-... I like your hair!"

"Uh-huh..." said MJ.

And so ends this Arc where betrayals are made and loyalties were questioned!But...Things are happening somewhere out there...Something horrible...

Meanwhile...

"Hey," said Gabby. "Welcome to Tina Tiger's Pizzaverse. May I take your order...?" she sighed as animatronics in the form of a female tiger wearing athletic sports clothes, a male cow wearing a sweater underneath a shirt with shorts and sandals, a handsome lion who wears a handsome suit, a cute female Hyena wearing a clown get-up, and a creepy female vulture in a Goth get-up.

Each of their eyes slowly turns to Gabby as Bill's laughter could be heard in the distance.