5. CHAPTER 5
CHAPTER 5
Today is the big day…the day they have been waiting for. They arranged with the hospital to pick up the baby today and take her home. Carina cleared her schedule and Maya got Andy to cover for her at the station using her PTO. They spent the morning getting the final touches done on the apartment and making sure their paperwork was all set.
Maya is currently doing the dishes from their breakfast, completely lost in thought. She washes the final dish and decides that maybe she should check in with the station before they get ready to head out. She takes out her phone and dials her main office line. It only takes a moment before she hears Herrera on the other line.
“Captain, we have everything under control.” Andy answers from the captain’s office.
“I’m not calling to micromanage Lieutenant.” Maya says into the phone as she pours herself a third cup of coffee for the day.
“Really…there’s a first.” Andy mutters in her phone.
“Very funny.” Maya deadpans before taking a sip from her cup.
“What’s up?” Andy asks as she goes through an incident report that is handed to her from the front desk. “Are you all set for today?”
Maya tries to inhale a difficult breath before answering. “Yes.”
“You okay?” Andy asks.
Maya tilts her head back and forth, trying to figure out if she is or not. “I’m kinda having a bit of a moment…so distract me.”
“Okay…” Andy drawls as she tries to think of something to tell her. “We put the new probie on kitchen duty…he’s making a meatloaf.”
“Mmmm” Maya hums before shaking her head…nope, not gonna cut it. “I need a bigger distraction.”
Andy clicks her tongue before ripping the wound open. “Sullivan tried calling me last night.”
“Wow...” Maya stutters quietly before squinting her eyes. “Tried? So you didn’t talk to him.”
“I’m not ready.” Andy answers.
Maya takes a long breath. “Andy if you are still avoiding him because of me--”
“There are a lot of reasons.” Andy says cutting her off, not wanting her to blame herself in any way.
“Maybe you should hear him out.” Maya suggests cautiously. “See what he has to say.”
“No.” Andy says before running her hand over her head. “My life has been blow after blow after blow.”
“I know.” Maya sighs knowingly.
Andy bites her lip before continuing. “Time…I just need to do this in my own time.”
“I’m sorry Andy.” May apologizes knowing how hard this has been on her. “And I’m sorry I have been so busy with--”
“Stop.” Andy cuts her off quickly. “We have spent years focusing on me…we’re focusing on you now. Period.”
“That’s good.” Maya says as she laughs through her lips nervously. “Because I will need you.”
“I’m here.” Andy says firmly. “Always.”
“Thanks.” Maya says with a smile. “I should let you go…get back to captaining.”
Andy nods her head on the other end. “Wait…”
“Yea?” Maya questions.
“How are you doing with today?” Andy asks her friend.
Maya nods her head a few times before resting her free hand on her hip. “Again…I’m good.”
“You’re right. You are good.” Andy agrees trying to give her friend a confidence boost.
“I’ll talk to you later.” Maya says to her friend before hanging up the phone.
She sets the phone down on the counter and tries to stretch her neck; feeling like not enough air is getting into her body. Maya continues to breathe and thinks about this big step they are taking today. It’s one thing to talk about it...but now they are doing it.
Carina walks in the kitchen from the bedroom after getting off the phone with the hospital, making final arrangements for the baby. “Okay, I just got off the phone with Hayes…he’s going to help get her ready to go.”
“Sounds good.” Maya says as she takes another sip of her coffee. “Do we need all the paperwork to pick her up?”
“No, we can just go get her.” Carina explains as she starts to look around the kitchen. “Mrs. Kentzman will be by tomorrow to check in on us.
“I don’t …I can’t remember.” Maya mutters out as she nurses the back of her neck before stretching…trying to alleviate the tension.
“Maya have you seen my black jacket?” Carina asks as she looks around the dining room and living room for the coat she wanted to wear. “The one with the plaid pockets.”
Maya swallows the lump in her throat as her chest begins to tighten. “Uhh….”
“Here it is!” Carina says excited as she finds the jacket on the floor by the couch.
Maya had been doing so well. So when it hits, she isn’t expecting it. Suddenly, out of nowhere, she feels her breath begin to quicken and her heart start to pound in her chest. She quickly closes her eyes and clutches her chest trying to get herself under control.
“Bambina?” Carina asks concerned from behind her.
“Crap, oh crap.” Maya murmurs to herself as she puts her hand down on the island, trying to keep herself from falling over.
The oncoming panic that is bubbling up inside her will not go away and neither will the dizziness. She can feel her sweaty palms slide on the table as she does everything in her power from falling over. She leans her body against the table as her respiratory system goes into overdrive.
“Maya, it’s okay.” Carina says calmly as he rushes towards her wife.
“What…” Maya says as she looks quickly to Carina, still supporting herself against the island, her body trembling. When she feels Carina’s arm wrap around her waist she tries to focus on her wife. “Pani--ic…”
“Breathe….mi amor, breathe.” Carina soothes in her ear.
“Wooo.” Maya says trying to breathe, but faltering when her breath is coming too fast.
Carina concerned looks to her wife’s face and her heart stops for a moment when she feels Maya slipping in her arms to the ground. Carina quickly gets on the ground with her wife and tries to grab hold of both of Maya’s arms…offering an anchor.
Carina squeezes her wife’s forearms and leans over to kiss Maya lightly on her head. “Breathe, in and out…..good.”
Maya continues to try to breathe but can feel herself still spinning and control of her body getting further and further away.
“Look at me Bambina…look at me.” Carina says as she gets close to Maya’s face. “Breathe.”
The fire captain looks into her wife’s eyes, her breath still coming out shakily and rapidly. “It’s a--a lot.”
“Maya.” Carina says, her voice wavering a bit but remaining calm. “Bambina, it is a lot. But it will be okay.”
“Wha--at if…what if I..?” Maya stutters out with her head bowed, her brain not keeping up with her words.
Carina places her nose on Maya’s chin nudging it slightly to get her wife to look up at her once more. “You won’t fail. You are strong and kind...and the best person I know.”
Maya nods her head trying to grasp on what her wife is saying. She continues to take slow long breathes and can finally see some light through the immense fear in her mind. Her vision starts to get clearer as she continues to hear her wife whispering comforting words in her ear. She takes a final breath and finally focuses on her wife.
“There she is.” Carina says smiling at her wife as she runs her hand down her hair and cheek.
Maya takes a steadying breath and immediately feels shame and regret over allowing an attack to happen. “I’m so--”
“Stop.” Carina says firmly cutting her off. “Do not apologize…you did nothing wrong.”
“We should be worrying about the baby and here you are now worrying about me.” Maya says.
“Maya, this is a big thing that is happening to us…and you get to feel all the big feelings.” Carina explains, trying to get through to her love.
Maya just nods her head and lets out a sigh. “I want to be the person who isn’t scared.”
“I’m scared.” Carina says as she tilts her head to the side. “This is all happening really fast and I am scared.”
“You don’t seem scared.” Maya retorts back as she continues to try to get her body to calm down.
“That is because I have had you reassuring me since the day we found out.” Carina says with a smirk.
“You can do this.” Maya confirms.
“So can you.” Carina says smiling before grabbing her phone from her back jeans pocket.
Maya confused raises an eyebrow. “What are you doing?”
“I am going to call Hayes…tell him that we can’t pick Ginetta up today.” Carina says as she starts to scroll her contacts on her phone.
Hearing this Maya takes a sharp breath before reaching for the phone. “No, you’re not.”
“Bambina… we can take the day and pick the baby up tomorrow.” Carina says.
“No.” Maya says firmly to her wife. “I have had panic attacks before, I’ll have them again…we go get the baby today as planned.”
Carina looks at Maya skeptically. “Are you sure?”
“Positive.” Marina says as she kisses Carina on the side of the head before getting up off the floor to lend a hand to her wife. “Dr. DeLuca?”
“Captain Bishop.” Carina says with a smile as Maya helps her stands up. “Let’s go.”
“Absolutely.” Maya says with a smile as they make their way to the front door.
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When the couple arrives at the hospital Maya is surprised when Carina drives to the back of the hospital instead of the main parking lot. The fire captain looks around confused, but gets out of the car with her wife and steps over to the secluded area.
Maya looks around before shrugging her shoulders. “What are we doing back here?”
“Most of the hospital doesn’t know about Ginetta yet.” Carina explains to the blonde. “We figured the rumor mill would go crazy if I walked out with a baby.”
“I guess that’s true.” Maya concludes.
Carina lets out a long breath before shrugging her shoulders. “Everybody will find out…I just want to protect the baby from the craziness.”
“Of course you do.” Maya says knowing Carina would do anything to protect this child.
“There he is.” Carina gushes when Dr. Hayes walks out with Ginetta in one arm and a bag full of belongs hanging off his other shoulder. “Dr. Hayes.”
Hayes smiles and looks to make sure they are still alone. “We use this exit for our celebrities….low chance of paparazzi.”
“Well it is very dagger with the cloak.” Carina says with a smirk.
“Cloak and dagger.” Maya corrects thoroughly amused.
Carina scoffs and shakes her head. “Stupid idioms.”
“Ginetta and I wanted to keep a low profile.” Hayes jokes with a laugh before facing Ginetta in his arm. “Didn’t we?”
“Hi Piccola!” Carina gushes as she holds out her arms to take the baby which Hayes obliges. Once she has Ginetta in her arms she offers a sweet kiss to her cheek. “Hello sweet girl.”
“Here you go.” Hayes says to Maya before handing her the small duffle bag. “I packed up some toys she likes and some other things.”
“Thanks.” Maya says to the doctor.
“Thank you Hayes.” Carina repeats as she starts to rub circles on Ginetta’s back. “You have done so much for her…for us.”
“Of course.” Hayes says sincerely as he touches his chest with his hand. “I was happy to help.”
Maya nods her head and smiles at the man. “We appreciate it.”
“I also have good news regarding Wesley Kensington.” Hayes says as he places his hands on his hips. “They found a great home in Tacoma…the new parents have been waiting a very long time for that call.”
Maya looks to her wife who is smiling at the news before letting out a relieved sigh. “That’s great news.”
“It is….good news all around today.” Hayes says happily before reaching over to the bag to take something out. “Speaking of…there’s also this.”
Carina watches Hayes takes out a yellow and grey knitted baby blanket. “It’s beautiful.”
“BokHee knitted it for her.” Hayes says.
“What?” Carina says surprised before taking her free hand to run over the knitted blanket. “She did?”
“Ginetta gravitated towards the yellow toys in the nursery.” Dr. Hayes explains to the two women. “That’s why BokHee used yellow and grey yarn.
“How did she know?” Carina asks confused.
Dr. Hayes snickers under his breath. “I am learning that BokHee knows everything.”
“That’s definitely true.” Carina agrees through ha laugh before smiling gently. “She had a soft spot for Andrea.”
Hayes nods his head in agreement before clapping his hands together. “Are you all set with the car seat and everything?”
“I’m insulted.” Maya retorts offended.
“Right.” Hayes sighs as he points at the fire captain. “I forgot.”
Maya laughs as she takes the baby blanket from Hayes before turning to her wife. “Ready?”
“Yea.” Carina says quickly.
“What about you Ms. DeLuca?” Maya asks as she leans closer to the baby. “You ready to go home?”
Hayes smiles at the interaction between the three. “If you need anything let me know.”
“Thanks Cormac.” Carina says again.
“You’re welcome.” Hayes says as he steps back to the door. “Just promise me you won’t turn her into another Italia football hothead.”
“No promises!” Carina calls after him as he makes his way back into the hospital.
Maya smiles at the interaction before taking a steadying breath. “Let’s go.”
“Are you okay?” Carina asks as Maya opens the back door for Carina.
Maya sighs at the repeated question before kissing Carina on the cheek. “Babe, I’m good.”
“Alright, let’s go Piccola!” Carina cheers to the baby as she buckles her into the car seat.
The ride from the hospital to their house is a slow one with Maya going the speed limit exactly. Carina rotates between smiling back at the baby and her wife…feeling absolute joy in this moment. When they pull into their apartment Carina goes and grabs the baby while Maya grabs the new stuff the baby acquired from the hospital, including a very special baby blanket. When they walk through the hallway Maya is the one to open the door for her family.
“Here we are.” Maya sings as she moves aside for Carina and Ginetta. “Home sweet home.”
“Finally.” Carina sighs.
“I’ll lead the tour.” Maya says as she puts down the stuff in the entryway.
Carina laughs and bounces the baby slightly in her arm. “Lead the way Bambina.”
“This is the entryway…and this is the living room.” Maya says giving he tour as they make their way through the apartment. “We have some furniture and vagina art.”
“Bambina.” Carina warns jokingly.
“What?” Maya asks laughing before pointing to the baby. “Ms. DeLuca here loves high quality art….her taste is very sophisticated.”
Carina simply tilts her head at her wife. “You don’t do baby talk do you?”
“It has not been my strong suit, no.” Maya says with a shake of her head.
“That’s okay.” Carina giggles before looking down at Ginetta who is smiling around her pacifier at Maya. “She likes you.”
“We also have an alarming amount of throw pillows.” Maya says with a smirk before pointing to Carina. “Thanks to the gorgeous woman holding you.”
Carina just scrunches her nose at the dig. “Cute, very cute.”
“Let’s show her the kitchen.” Maya says as she reaches to take the baby from Carina who passes her off warmly. “You can be the one to explain the cheese smell.”
“Very funny.” Carina says as her heart fills at the sight of Maya holding Ginetta for the first time.
“Here is the beanery…with a high chair.” Maya says to the baby as she introduces random items in the kitchen. “That I watched get built…you are very welcome.”
“What do you think?!” Carina gushes to the baby as she rubs her cheek with her finger. “We also have a place for you to sleep.”
“To the baby’s room!” Maya exclaims as they continue their tour of the new home.
When they arrive in the baby’s room Carina waves her hand in excitement. “Look at the toys! I promise we can get more later on.”
“More?” Maya asks quickly wanting to know how they could possibly buy more toys.
“Let’s look at your clothes!” Carina cheers as she gently pushes Maya towards the closet, ignoring the previous comment entirely.
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Later on back at Grey-Sloan Dr. Bailey is at the nurses’ station on the surgical floor looking over a few patients and other schedules that need to be finalized. She is just making the final touches on a patient’s chart when Dr. Hayes comes walking over.
“Chief.” Hayes greets.
“Dr. Hayes.” Bailey greets back before handing the chart on the iPad back to the nurse behind the desk. “How did it go this afternoon?”
“It went well.” Hayes informs his boss before grinning. “It was lovely to see actually.”
Bailey nods his head before raising an eye brow at the doctor. “How did Bishop look?”
“Good?” Hayes says hesitantly before thinking about it. “I think?”
“I’ve got a soft spot for Captain Bishop.” Bailey says as she goes back to look at her notes on her personal iPad. “I have a soft spot for both of them.”
“I know Chief.” Hayes says sincerely before nodding his head down the hallway. “I’ve got rounds.”
Bailey nods her head at Hayes before noticing Jo Wilson walking towards them. “Wilson!”
“Hey.” Hayes says as he passes Wilson.
“Hey!” Wilson says back before walking up to the chief. “Do you need me for a case?”
“I do not.” Bailey says looking up from the iPad. “But I do need your help.”
Jo raises an eye brow in confusion. “What is it?”
“Carina has asked me to get the news out about the baby.” Bailey goes on to explain. “She wants the shock to be over with before she brings the baby here for daycare.”
“That makes sense.” Jo says after thinking it over. “Did they take the baby home?”
“This afternoon.” Bailey answers taking out her phone to look at an email that was just sent her way before continuing. “I told Richard and Catherine this morning and now we need to spread the news to everyone else.”
“How are you going to do that?” Jo asks as Dr. Helm comes walking over to them.
“Hey Chief you paged.” Helm says as she sticks her hands in her front coat pockets.
Bailey nods her head. “Dr. Helm, thank you for coming.”
“Am I in trouble?” Helm asks quickly as Dr. Schmitt and Dr. Perez come walking over too.
“You wanted to see us Chief?” Dr. Perez asks.
Dr. Schmitt holds his hands up in defense. “I didn’t do it.”
“Andrew DeLuca fathered a child before he died. The mother has surrendered all rights and has disappeared. Dr. Carina DeLuca and her wife Captain Maya Bishop now have custody of the baby girl.” Dr. Bailey says cutting to the chase coolly to her three residents. “Her name is Ginetta.”
“I’m sorry…” Schmitt drawls with wide eyes before freaking out. “What!”
“That was a lot to take in.” Helm says as she touches her forehead with her hand.
“Oh my god! I have to tell everyone!” Zander Perez exclaims excitedly before walking away from the group.
“You heard him.” Bailey says as she nods her head to the side. “Go spread the news.”
“So let me get this straight.” Helm says wanting clarification. “You want me to go around the hospital…talking.”
“Yes.” Bailey says firmly.
“But you tell me I talk too much.” Helm replies utterly confused.
“Go use your powers for good.” Bailey orders the resident.
Dr. Schmitt still speechless just blinks his eyes repeatedly. “I can’t feel my face.”
“Oh, come on.” Helm sighs as she grabs Schmitt’s arm to drag him away.
Jo watches the residents scurry off to do the chief’s bidding before grinning. “Impressive.”
“I give those fools 20 minutes before the whole hospital knows.” Dr. Bailey murmurs to herself.
Ten seconds later Nurse Gina from the ICU comes walking over. “Andrew DeLuca had a baby!”
“That was quick.” Jo deadpans as Nico and Schmitt come rushing over to the group.
“Is it true?!” Dr. Kim exclaims in shock.
Schmitt rolls his eyes at his boyfriend. “Of course it’s true; I’m the one that told you.”
“Wow.” Jo says bewildered.
“Dr. Wilson will answer any questions!” Dr. Bailey yells out to those surrounding them before making a quick exit. “Make sure only the truth is being spread around.”
“Seriously!” Jo yells out annoyed that she got duped to such an annoying task. “Come on!”
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A couple hours later after getting Ginetta settled in the three ladies find themselves sitting on the floor in their living room surrounded by toys. All of their friends had been so considerate to get the baby all this stuff for the little girl.
Carina smiles with Ginetta settled in her lap as they continue to watch Maya analyze and critique a plastic toy fire truck that Warren got for the baby.
“Maya, it’s just a toy!” Carina exclaims at her wife’s antics.
“It’s not accurate.” Maya complains as she continues to examine the plastic fire truck. “The ladder is on the wrong side and the hose is just hanging there.”
“It’s a toy.” Carina deadpans as she rolls her eyes.
“It’s misleading.” Maya says as she holds the toy up to her face. “She’ll be confused when she comes to the station.”
“What about this? Is this okay?” Carina asks as she hands Maya a stuffed teddy bear.
“I mean the proportions are all off.” Maya says as she looks over the bear. “And I saw a bear like 5 feet away, so I know.”
“She did.” Carina laughs Ginetta as she sways back and forth with her in her lap. “She ran through the woods with a nose in a little baggie.”
“It’s true.” Maya brags as she makes a goofy face to the baby. “I totally did that.”
“Before I forget, I need to email Jo some information on a couple of my patients.” Carina says while brushing Ginetta’s soft brown bangs away from her eyes. “Will you remind me after we put her to bed?”
“Of course.” Maya says with a nod of her head. “How long is your leave for?”
“Chief said I could take as much time as I need.” Carina says, shrugging her shoulders. “We’ll see.”
“Sounds good.” Maya says before passing the teddy bear to Ginetta. “Here you go.”
“Are you sure you don’t mind taking another shift off of work?” Carina asks.
“Of course not.” Maya answers as she crosses her legs out in front of her. “Andy and Jack got it covered.”
“It’ll be nice for the three of us to spend some time together.” Carina says with a smile before kissing the top of Ginetta’s head. “Get into some routines.”
Maya’s face lights up and she claps her hands together. “Yes! Speaking of routines….”
“Oh no.” Carina whispers in Ginetta’s ear when she watches her wife pull something from her bag by the couch. “She has a clipboard.”
“Yes, I do.” Maya says with a proud smile before showing her wife. “I have a baby clipboard.”
“And what is on this clipboard Captain?” Carina asks as she tries to bite back her laugh.
“Everything we know so far.” Maya says as she starts to flip through the pages. “We have information about the extra nutrients she needs to get her weight up, when certain milestones should happen by month, doctor’s appointment notes.”
Carina sighs shaking her head. “Oh boy.”
“What?” Maya laughs innocently.
“Nothing.” Carina hums as she smiles at her wife.
“I also have these.” Maya says before reaching over to the bag to pull out four books.
Carina watches Maya plop the books in front o them on the floor. “Woe.”
“Books on parenting and child development.” Maya explains.
“So many.” Carina giggles as Ginetta tries to reach for one of the heavy books.
Maya shrugs innocently. “I want to be prepared now that she is officially here with us.”
“That is very sweet.” Carina says smiling widely at her wife who is still looking at the stack of books. “And very you.”
Maya giggles back at her wife before they are interrupted by a pained fussing noise coming from the baby in Carina’s lap. Both women look at the baby who is now scrunching her face uncomfortably and trying to touch her cheek with her little hand.
“Is she okay?” Maya asks concerned.
“Ummmm…..” Carina hums out before pulling down Ginetta’s bottom lip to confirm her suspicion. “Yup, right there.”
“What is it?” Maya asks as she leans closer to the baby.
Carina takes another quick look at the little expanse of white embedded in her swollen pink gums. “Looks like she’s got a tooth coming in.”
“Ouch.” Maya winces.
“Sweet girl.” Carina gushes as she rocks her back and forth a bit. “It sucks that she has deal with cutting teeth while adjusting to being here with us.”
“She’ll be okay.” Maya assures her wife before smiling at Ginetta who has nestled closer into Carina’s lap. “She looks pretty content in your arms.”
“Mmm.” Carina hums before resting her cheek on top of Ginetta’s head.
“Not that I blame her.” Maya says before leaning closer to speak to the baby. “I like cuddling in her arms too.”
Carina lets out a smile but then studies her wife’s face. “How are you doing?”
“Babe…” Maya sighs before holding up her clipboard. “Did you not see my clipboard?”
“Right, right.” Carina laughs before tilting her head at the blonde. “I love you.”
“I love you too.” Maya says as she paces a kiss on Carina’s cheek before standing up from the floor. “Now…I am going to get a round for the house before diving into some of these books.”
Carina watches her wife walk away before calling after her. “My bottle better not be green!”
“Noted!” Maya calls over her shoulder.
Carina again laughs at her wife before going back to Ginetta who is now looking up at her. “You don’t know this yet but she is our favorite person….she’s the best.”