CUPCAKE FOUR

That afternoon Akira was playing with Michiko at the playground near their house.  Kitaro did not go with them.  He chose to stay at home.  He just got back from a business trip to New York last night.

"I'm so tired, Akira. You don't mind being alone with Michiko, right?" said Kitaro Eiji.  He kissed his daughter's cheek.  His nose accidentally touched Akira's.  And he felt that he was being electrocuted by an electric eel.  He was immediately clumsy.

"It's okay, Eiji. I'm always happy to be playing with Michiko. You take some rest. You look terrible. Go." he said.  Akira acted casual but his gaze was gentle on Kitaro Eiji. Akira was always like that. He was so kind and gentle to everyone. Kitaro Eiji just realized that after meeting Akira again and being friends with him. 

Then Akira left with his daughter. Kitaro Eiji entered the house and immediately fell asleep in his room. He was so exhausted and jet lagged. 

Kitaro Eiji is fast asleep.  He slept several hours.  He was still deep in his sleep when Akira and Michiko came home.  He dreams of torturing Akira to death.  He screamed apologetically and called out Akira's name.

"Akiraaaa!!!! "

Akira, who was watching TV with Michiko, was surprised.  He was confused why Kitaro Eiji was screaming his name.  He immediately grabbed Michiko and carried her in his arms and ran to Kitaro Eiji's room.  He found the man still asleep, but he was restless in his sleep.  His body trembled and sweat dripped down his forehead and temples.  

Akira put Michiko on the bed.  He sat on the bed and he took a tissue that lay on the nightstand.  He wiped Kitaro Eiji's sweat.

"Eiji.. Eiji.. Did you have a bad dream?"  Akira  patted his cheek to wake him up. 

Kitaro Eiji felt like someone patted his cheeks and called his name. He slowly opened his eyes and woke up from a bad dream.

"Have a bad dream,  huh? Do you want to drink water?" said Akira. 

"Yes. Please." Kitaro Eiji nodded. He took Michiko and put her on his lap. 

Akira stood up and ran out of the room to get some water.

"Papa... Papa has a bad dream?" Michiko asked her Papa. 

"Yes, dear. Papa had a really bad dream." he nodded to his little girl.  He hugged her and kissed her head. 

"Do you miss Papa, dear?" he smiled and looked at her eyes. 

"Yes,  Papa. I miss you." She kissed  his cheek. 

"Oh,  Michiko. Papa misses you so much. Papa is always thinking of you." he hugged his lovely little daughter even tighter. He never left his daughter before. It was the first time he had to leave Michiko. He was worried about going for his business trip last week. But Akira convinced him and Kitaro Eiji knew that Akira would take care of his daughter well. He knew Akira loved his daughter so he went for his business trip without doubt. He looked at his daughter. Michiko was healthy and fine. He knew it. 

He cupped Michiko's face. "Do you have fun with Mama,  Michiko?" 

Akira came to the room and Kitaro Eiji was so embarrassed because of what he had said. He hoped that Akira didn't hear it. But Akira seemed normal as usual.

"Here. Drink it." Akira handed a glass of water to him. Akira heard what Kitaro Eiji said. But he pretended not to hear about it. He was surprised because Kitaro Eiji called him "Mama" but he stayed calm. Akira felt something strange deep in his heart. That morning when Kitaro wanted to kiss his daughter, their noses touched. Akira felt like he was electrocuted. He really didn't have an idea for what happened to him. He was the one who wanted to make Kitaro Eiji down on his knees but why did he end up feeling like spring season is coming. He smiled

"What the hell are you having a bad dream in the daylight,  Eiji?" Akira stood next to him. 

Kitaro put the empty glass on the nightstand. "I don't know,  Akira. Maybe I'm to tired"

"And what are you dreaming of? You. scream and call my name. What happened" Akira lifted Kitaro Eiji's chin and looked into his eyes.

Kitaro Eiji wanted to tell him about his dream but he didn't want his daughter to know about it. It was inappropriate for a child. He beckoned Akira to come closer. Akira lowered his body. 

Kitaro Eiji reached out his head and whispered in his ear "I was dreaming about you. I was torture you and killed you. It's really bad. I don't want it to happen. I mean it,  Akira. I don't want you to die." He pulled out his hand and released Akira.

Akira felt his heart beating fast and it tickled when Kitaro Eiji whispered in his ear. He shivered and his face reddened. Once again he tried to be calm. "What?!" he said. 

"Yeah. I know it's weird but it's my dream." Kitaro Eiji looked at Akira's face. "Why do you look like a shrimp boil?"

Akira laughed out loud. He was embarrassed but he covered it with laughter and pretended to remain calm.

Kitaro Eiji looked at her daughter in his arms. "Shh.. Michiko fell asleep. Why are you laughing? Are you happy to see me suffer?" Kitaro Eiji frowned.

"I'm sorry.. I'm not laughing at you. I feel it's weird. Or do you feel guilty for me?" Akira raised his brows. 

Kitaro Eiji took her daughter from his arms, laid her on bed and looked at Akira. Their gaze met. "Yeah. I feel guilty for you. I treated you so badly. I don't deserve you to be my friend and I don't deserve you to help me through my difficulties during this time, Akira. Please forgive me,  Akira."

Akira came closer to him. He stood beside the bed. Akira reached out his hand, grabbed Kitaro Eiji's head, and hugged him. Kitaro Eiji buried his face in his stomach. And hugged him back. 

"Have you always been haunted by feelings of guilt during this years?" Akira asked. 

Kitaro Eiji lifted his head and faced him. This man in his arms had tortured by him but he still treated him kind and gently. He also took care of his daughter every day. He owed so much to Akira. It was the time to admit his sin.

"I was so wrong to treat you like that. I regret everything I've done to you. I had no reason to be so bad and cruel to you. But I did it. I almost killed you at that time. It was the worst thing I've done to you. I've been feeling guilty for you until now. I don't know how to make amends to you. I know I don't deserve your mercy. But I do regret it. I promise I'll treat you well. Now I realized why Hiro always defends you. You're the best thing that we ever have. Can you forgive me,  Akira?"

Akira blinked his eyes to avoid tears. He hugged Kitaro Eiji even tighter. He sighed.

"I do forgive you, Eiji, from a long time ago. Don't feel guilty anymore. Please.. It hurts you so much,  right? Don't do that. It's all in the past. We're friends now,  okay?" Akira rubbed Kitaro Eiji's hair gently. "What should I do to ease your pain?"

Kitaro Eiji pulled Akira's body to sit on the bed. He hugged Akira tightly. Akira rested his chin on his shoulder. Kitaro caressed Akira's long soft hair. He buried his face on Akira's neck. He felt relieved and comfortable. He didn't want to miss this moment. He wanted it to last forever. They get carried away. Kitaro Eiji pulled his head and faced Akira. They were so close to each other. He rested his forehead on Akira's. Their noses touched. They stayed like that for a couple of minutes. Akira closed his eyes and sighed. Kitaro Eiji felt like he wanted to kiss him.  And he tilted his head looking for Akira's lips. Their lips met. They kissed. Kitaro Eiji liked Akira's lips. They were so soft and sweet. Their lips pressed against each other.  Kitaro Eiji stroked Akira's nape gently. Akira moaned. He whispered his name. "Eiji.. " But Kitaro Eiji didn't want to answer. He hoped that their first romantic moment would last. For Akira it was like a dream. And he didn't want to wake up from that dream. But it seemed the universe was against them. 

"Mama.. " Michiko woke up. Michiko slipped between their bodies.

They were surprised by the gentle voice and the presence of someone within their bodies.  Kitaro Eiji stopped the kiss.  Akira pulled himself from Kitaro Eiji's embrace.

They felt so embarrassed. Akira blushed. Akira was so awkward. He stood up and wanted to run away from the room. But Kitaro Eiji seemed to be able to handle it. He was a man full of confidence and he was so mature. He grabbed Akira's hand and shook his head. "Don't."

Akira stayed and hugged Michiko. "Are you awake, Princess?" he smiled. 

"Mama.. I'm hungry." Michiko said. Begging for food. 

"Are you hungry my dear?" Kitaro Eiji asked his daughter. 

"Yes,  Papa. I want to eat."

Akira and Kitaro Eiji chuckled. 

"And what do you want to eat, Princess?" Akira lifted her chin and kissed the little girl. 

"I want to eat cupcakes,  Mama."

"Okay. You'll got some cupcakes. C'mon." he carried Michiko in his arms. And looked at Michiko's father. 

Kitaro Eiji was so helpless. He didn't want Akira to leave him. But he didn't want his daughter to suffer from hunger. He gave up.

Akira still blushed but he smiled at him. "We'll go,  Eiji. And you have to sleep. I'll bring you some food."

"Please come back to me, Akira." Kitaro Eiji said. 

Akira nodded and left him alone.