Chapter 15

At this point I had to tell the chimpanzee that I left that place because I went to serve a prison term for a rape that I did not commit. The Chimpanzee saw what I had said as the funniest thing ever said in the world, for he literally fell from his table to the floor in uncontrollable laughter. This man continued to laugh for about five minutes or more. When he managed to regain some control

he stood up and sat on his chair again, struggling against the temptation to laugh with the same intensity with the one that made him fall down.

You are an interesting young man. What do you drink?' Before I could open my mouth to answer he opened his office fridge and brought out a bottle of beer for me. He also lit a cigarette and inhaled the smoke enthusiastically into his lungs. He offered me one and once again remarked that I was a very interesting person.

I didn't know what the chimpanzee was up to. The only thing I knew was that I was getting embarrassed by his laughter and actions. I opened the beer and started to drink. Getting a lighter from him, I lit the cigarette and started to smoke. I didn't care if this pleasure-seeking action cost me a job not yet got. I had not tasted beer for long, and I needed it.

'Don't be offended by my laughter' said the chimpanzee 'thevidea of being convicted for rape is very funny to me. I mean, to rape at all is funny I protested very vehemently to the chimpanzee and told him that I did not commit the offence, and that my imprisonment was one of the most unjust actions by our country's judiciary. The effect of this on the chimpanzee was that it made him burst into laughter, at the end of which he said ....

'Be sincere. No ex-convict-would agree that he committed the offence for which he was convicted.' I told him that even if it was the behaviour of ex-convicts to proclaim innocence where they were guilty, he should rule me out of this because my own case was a great mistake by the judge. This had no effect on him for he said you are the type of man I am looking for... I like to

meet people like you.... People who like women to excess..

I like women and I want people like you to help me get them and I am happy you are a man who likes women.' I was getting offended by the chimpanzee's line of talk. I protested to him

again that he had made a mistake to think that I liked women too much. I told him that although I was a virile young man, women were among the last things in my order of priority. The chimpan-

zee smiled and said 'You are trying to deceive me.

I cannot be fooled. I know that you are a rapist and that all rapists like women.' 'I am not a rapist and I do not like women'. I said with an edge to my voice. 'Anyway' said the ugly man 'even if you say that you are not a rapist, you are still an ex-convict. We do not employ ex-convicts. It is wrong to do so' I heard. 'What section of the constitution or penal code says it is wrong to employ ex-convicts?" I asked. My friend' said the chimpanzee, we do not work according to the constitution or penal code here. We work

according to public opinion.' I asked him whether he believed that public opinion was against the employment of ex-convicts.

'Certainly' said the goblin 'our girls in British American Insurance here would be the first to protest if we employ a rapist.' This was when I realised that the chimpanzee was a clown who wasn't going to employ me. 'I consider you to be something of a stupid man' I told him. Instead of getting offended by this insult, the chimpanzee started to laugh. 'Can you say this' said he 'that a

boss in an insurance company is a stupid man while a criminal rapist is not?'

I looked at his physical fitness and weighed my chances in a physical fight with him. This was because he had so provoked me that I thought it fit to use my fists. But fearing that such a fight

might 'create new problems for me and add to my present load, I simply stood up and left his office.

I continued along the road from Abba Ganaram to Galadima.

Just before I could reach Galadima, my eyes caught a sign board which read 'Christian Bookshop.' I followed the direction of the arrow and entered the Bookshop. I went to an elderly man who was busy writing. 'Can I help you?' he said. I told him I had come to see if I could be employed. You hold a university degree?' I nodded. The man told me he wasn't sure if there were vacancies, but that if there was any vacancy a Raphael Ekanem was certainly going to employ me. 'Raphael Ekanem is in charge of employ-

ment. He is an upright man who will surely employ you if there is any vacancy.

Raphael Ekanem is a God-fearing man who leads the christian league in this town. He is also the secretary of Brethren Christian Organisation. Brethren Christian Organisation is the largest christian body in the country... What I mean is, he is a holy man who will certainly employ you, once there is a vacancy.' I asked the man to tell me how I could get into the office of this man. He pointed towards the right! Raphael Ekanem' is written on his door.'

I knocked on it and I was told to come in." Brother what can I do for you?' he asked. I told him I needed a job in his Bookshop. There is only one vacancy for a graduate. You are a University

graduate? I nodded. 'Good' said Raphael Ekanem 'I will have to give you the job.' My heart missed a beat in my incredulity. So I was going to get a job here. This vacancy is very competitive" he said. I didn't say anything to this. 'Are you from this

country?' he asked. I told him I was a bona fide citizen of this country. 'Good. What do you have for me?" he asked. At first I didn't understand his question. I had to do some hard thinking before I realised that Raphael Ekanem was asking me for a bribe.

One reason why I wasn't quick in getting the meaning of his question was I wasn't prepared in the least to hear such a question from the leader of the largest christian organisation in the country.

I had only thirty naira on me, and this was all that remained on me out of the money my landlady gave me at Ibadan. 'I have only thirty naira on me'

I said. Raphael Ekanem told me to give the money to him, which i did. 'As Christians leaders, we live on charity' he told me