Short Story 4 : Himeno Yuki’s SS - A Boy I Don’t Really Understand

The night of the day when I talked to Kanzaki-kun and the others. Having remained in Keyaki Mall until it was late, I was called out to by Ayanokouji-kun who had passed his time the same way.

"Nn—... I was spacing out. Like going to the general store, and making my way to the front of the cinema for no reason?"

Answering the reason why I stayed behind until it was nighttime, I tried vocalising a bit about something that came to mind.

"Since we're going in the same direction, if it's fine with you, should we walk to the dormitory together?"

I'm not going to say that I understood my classmates. However, I don't know even more about Ayanokouji-kun. That's why I thought it'll be good to know what kind of person he is, even if it's just a little bit.

I'm not good at or like talking to people. There are an uncountable amount of times that I felt it was annoying.

However, before I knew it, I was having a lively conversation with Ayanokouji-kun who was walking by my side.

It isn't that I'm interested in him as a member of the opposite sex. It isn't anything like that. How do I put this, like we're on the same wavelength?

But I'm not sure about the exact reason. How do I put this, he's a boy that I don't really understand.

"I realised that, more than I'd imagined, I couldn't do anything. Like, I'm a bit awesome for being able to notice that Ichinose-san was on thin ice when others didn't notice. Or I'm teaming up with Kanzaki-kun and doing something special. Having ungrounded confidence like that. I feel that I've been humbled."

Even though it's something you would be pissed about if it's pointed out by other people, Ayanokouji-kun's words genuinely struck me.

"I don't know what to say. I guess my bad."

"It's not something you have to apologise for. Instead, what you said is correct."

Contrary to the feeling of wanting to be honest with myself towards people other than him, I feel scared.

Someone like that isn't me. It's because I have some kind of feeling that I'd change into a different existence.

"Even though I thought it'd be way easier to pull off something amazing... Taking action is hard."

"It's the same for anyone. For Ichinose, for me. Turning thoughts into actions is probably something hard."

"We're in the middle of looking for the path we should advance, but at this rate, I've lost confidence in whether taking action with Kanzaki-kun and Hamaguchi-kun would improve things or not."

"Hesitating isn't a bad thing. However, it's not a problem that could be solved if you standstill."

That's certainly true. He's right. But...

I don't know if the work we're currently putting in to change the class will really move in the right direction.

"That's true. But even though we should be taking action to save the class, the invisible gears are beginning to go awry little by little. I can't help but feel that."

Something that I'm feeling. That is that the situation would become worse than it is now.

I want to think that it's not going to turn out like that, but I don't have the materials at hand that could let me feel at ease.

Please let this uneasiness just be me overthinking. That's what I thought.

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Translated by u/adventurousart8711