The Banquet

Here, Lin Yuchen could not tell whether or not he was dreaming.

The sky was a bright, blinding blue, so bright that he had to gaze at the ground for a while until his pupils adjusted. There he noticed that the yellow-green grasses, waving gently in the breeze, came up to about his knees. The air was very light.

"I'm hungry," he said to himself, aloud, as though someone else might hear him. After all, it was still too bright to look anywhere but at his feet. Someone could be about.

He began wading through the grass, and before long his pupils had finished adjusting. And though he was wading aimlessly, he felt as though his destination would present itself when the time came. He wandered for some time, but there didn't seem to be anything of interest besides the rolling hills and a couple mountain peaks. The only impression that he was not alone came in the form of a couple small yurts that had been pitched at the foot of a distant mountain.

Before he knew it, Lin Yuchen was standing before a long bridge. Its far side was shrouded in a layer of thick mist, giving it a dangerous air, but he crossed it anyway. As he was mildly afraid of heights, he gripped onto the red railing with all his strength and crossed very slowly. The hot sun was beating down on him ruthlessly, but he was more phased by the massive drop that came into view when peering off the edge of the bridge. The water below must have been a hundred--no, two hundred yards away or more.

The bridge went on for what seemed to be an eternity, but at last it gave way to another grassy hill. Glowing mountain peaks surrounded the place on both sides. A dilapidated stone pathway came into view, so he followed it. It looked to be wide enough to accommodate the width of several carriages, so he figured it must lead somewhere important.

After what must have been twenty minutes of walking, a little settlement showed itself. In the middle stood a large, two-storied palace with flying eaves and a black roof, accompanied on both sides by about twenty or thirty yurts, all of a uniform size and color. The perfectly symmetrical palace was surrounded by a stone wall, but it wasn't very tall--clearly more for looks than defense.

Lin Yuchen felt a rush of glee and raced towards the palace, like a bird returning to its nest. He didn't even notice the women and children lounging around the camp of yurts who looked on him with strange expressions. What a scene that fellow is making, they must have thought, but this never crossed his mind, for he was too eager to reach the front door. When he did he didn't even notice the gray-robed man already standing there.

"Watch where you're dashing about!" the man called, but it was too late. Lin Yuchen crashed into him and tumbled to the floor.

"Sir," Lin Yuchen climbed to his feet and brushed the dust off his trousers, "do you happen to have anything to eat? I am very hungry, you see."

"Do you have any idea what this place is?" the gray-robed man asked, nonplussed.

"No, I do not," came the answer.

"Hmm, nevermind that then," he said, "Speaking of food, though, we were just about to start the banquet. Why don't you join us?"

Lin Yuchen didn't hesitate to follow him in. The inside of the palace was even more grand and solemn than the outside. This must be the home of a great lord, he thought. Walking through the central corridor, he noticed the walls were lined with sturdy lacquer shelves that were sporting books, curios, weapons and various other kinds of wares. And where there were no shelves, scrolls and paintings were hanging, displaying undecipherable calligraphy and scenes of strange places.

He wanted to study them a bit more in depth, but had to keep up with the rather hurried pace of the gray-robed man, who before long lead him into a massive banquet hall.

"Please take the seat of honor." the gray-robed man motioned to an empty chair at the head of the middle of the three banquet tables. Men with the appearances of deities and kings and ladies that were beautiful as fairies were already sitting at the tables, and serving-boys were going around pouring everyone wine.

"Too kind, too kind," Lin Yuchen said as he threw himself into the chair.

It was at that moment that he realized all of the grandiose characters that had gathered there were wearing the same shade of gray as the gray-robed man. He alone had on a bright blue tunic with a white outer garment. After noticing this, his presence there suddenly seemed much more awkward than it had before. The room was painfully silent.

"My apologies, I was unaware everyone was in mourning," he said, figuring that to be the reason, "May I ask, with all due respect, who has left the world?"

"The world has," the gray-robed man told him, "We are all in mourning for the death of the world. This is the seventh time now..."

These words puzzled Lin Yuchen, but he went along with it. The others were all nodding with grave looks on their faces.

"My deepest condolences..."

Without any more delay, armies of serving-boys began bringing out the courses of the meal.

"The first course is," said the gray-robed man, now seated at the other end of the table from Lin Yuchen, "the Divine Prospect!"

The room was erupting into lively conversation as a plate was placed before each person, along with a set of Western-style utensils. Everyone else was sipping the wine and indulging in the Divine Prospect that was placed before them, but Lin Yuchen took one look at it and was utterly confused.

"This is the Divine Prospect?" he thought.

It didn't even look like food at all. When he looked at it, all he saw were a panorama of mountains and valleys with streams and canyons running erratic courses around and through them. There were so many mountains, he could not even count them all, and the water flowing through the streams would have looked life-like if it hadn't been so small. He could even make out tiny eagles perched in tiny trees.

"This isn't food," he said, this time aloud, inviting stares from a couple frightening faces with wrinkled brows. They all were enjoying the Divine Prospect, munching on it like little toddlers.

"This is BS," he said, "How come they have no problem eating it? How am I supposed to eat mountains and streams?"

"If you don't like it, then wait for the next course. Don't bother us while we're feasting!" the gray-robed man said sternly.

Lin Yuchen rolled his eyes, and waited till everyone had finished the first course. He helped himself to some wine in the meanwhile.

"The second course is the Evergreen Dao!"

Another round of serving-boys brought the next course out. When it was put in front of Lin Yuchen, he found that it no more resembled food than the Divine Prospect, for all he could see on his plate was a singular Han character. It was no character that he recognized, though. It must have had thousands of strokes going hither and thither, forming themselves into inexplicable radicals and folding into intricate fractal patterns. It was also changing color every instant, but they were not colors Lin Yuchen could match with words.

Looking around him, Lin Yuchen saw the other feast-goers devouring the Evergreen Dao. They were using the forks to stab the strokes or gather them into spoons, which they then shoved into their throats. The really long strokes they would cut up with a steak knife. At his wits' end, he pushed the plate away from him and forlornly put his head down.

"Perhaps you will enjoy the final course more," the gray-robed man laughed. His voice was barely audible in the room overflowing with the unflattering sounds of the feast-goers gorging themselves.

Before long the final course came out.

"The third and final course is Perfect Sophia!"

The serving-boys once again came out, but this time they removed the Western utensils and replaced them with chopsticks before putting in front of each person a simple bowl of noodles.

"Ah, you were right!" Lin Yuchen cackled, "This is more my speed!"

He grabbed the chopsticks and jabbed them into the bowl of steaming-hot noodles. But when he tried to pick them up, he found the noodles to be much slipperier than expected, so slippery in fact, that no matter what he could not maintain a hold of them long enough to put in his mouth. Every time he would try, they would slide right out from his chopsticks--it was extremely frustrating.

Sure enough, the other feast-goers were having no problem eating the Perfect Sophia. Suddenly he lifted his bowl above his head a little and tried to guide the noodles straight from the bowl into his mouth. But instead of that, they just slid right out and spilled onto his clothes and the floor, along with all the broth.

With the noodles all over the floor and his clothes stained with hot, sticky soup, he looked like a complete idiot in front of all the other feast-goers, who by now were staring at him with shocked expressions. They began whispering ferociously among each other, and though the whispering was plenty loud Lin Yuchen could not make out a single word.

"This is absolutely unacceptable." The gray-robed man's face was burning and his brows were knit tight. "Declining a meal is one thing, spilling it all over is quite another! What a waste of perfectly good Sophia. And, you look like a pig. You can't feast with us anymore. Someone get him out of here."

"Wait!" Lin Yuchen shouted, "I'm sorry! I was just trying to..."

Before he could finish a pair of armed guards seized him and began slapping him silly. Then they dragged him out the front entrance and threw him onto the ground. Laying on his back, he felt extremely drunk. He had never been a heavyweight. He let out a groan of pain and didn't feel like getting up. Instead, he stared up at the sky, until the sun's radiance began to overflow into his eyelids.

He closed them tight, but the light was just as intense as before.