Chapter 37

-Sakura's POV-

It could've been minutes, hours, or even days that I lay in a painful lull. All I knew was that I was in so much pain before losing consciousness that I wasn't sure I wanted to wake up again. The only thing that had me continuously trying to fight my way out of my clouded state of mind was the fact that Sasuke was in extreme danger when I last saw him. Not only that, but I couldn't let the last thing we said to each other be in anger.

It felt like something was clawing at the inside of my ribcage, trying to tear out of my body by force, and the longer I tried to ignore it the more painful it became. My eyes suddenly shot open as a sharp pain ran up my throat and then I was on my side coughing up blood while I tried to take in a breath.

Someone's hand was on my shoulder as they held my hair out of my face, but I couldn't look at them as I tried not to suffocate. Every inch of my body was in pain and shaking, the worst of it located where I'd been shot but my throat was a close second.

"I know it hurts, but you need to heal yourself while you're awake!" It was Sasuke. He sounded so overcome with panic that I'd almost be convinced it was a different person.

Sobs mixed in with my coughs and I tried to reach up and grab his hand in an attempt to wordlessly apologize for how we fought before I lost the chance. He pulled my body so I'd fall onto my back and unzipped my coat before pressing my hand against my stomach like he had earlier.

I choked as the blood coming up my throat pooled and fought to turn my head so I could spit it out. Somehow, I managed to rasp out, "S-Sasuke…" It hurt like hell just to speak.

He gripped my hand in between both of his tightly before pressing it against my torso once more, "Sakura, please, you have to." His unbearably helpless and desperate emotions came over me and I squeezed my eyes shut as I forced my body to move.

He helped me onto my hands and knees, keeping an arm across my chest so I wouldn't collapse forward. Awful cries and sobs tore from my body as I forced my hand up against my stomach, just under my ribcage, and made myself heal despite it feeling life every nerve in my body was being burnt.

It hurt worse than the pain that'd enveloped my entire body after Orochimaru first injected me with those odd serums. Sasuke's other arm came around my back and he held me tight the entire time. After a minute or two, my body got even weaker and I couldn't bear to even hold my hand up anymore.

Trembling fingers swiftly felt my skin where I'd been wounded and Sasuke let out a strange noise that sounded like a strange mixture of a relieved sigh and an exhausted groan. I could feel blood still dripping down my chin onto my neck, but could barely keep my eyes open.

"It's okay, you can rest now."

He didn't need to tell me twice.

I was woken up by something cold on my forehead and immediately groaned at the awful pain that ran through my midsection. The ground was hard under my body and the air felt a bit cool, but I was warm enough to be sweating, likely with a fever. My eyes opened and I instantly realized I was in a cave.

The sound of fire crackling finally registered in my ears and I turned my head to see it burning a yard or so away. The cold object on my forehead slid off and I looked at the ground where it fell to see that it was a torn piece of clothing soaked with water.

"I shouldn't have said those things to you."

I arched my neck to look up, only to realize my head was resting against Sasuke's thigh as he sat and stared at the fire with a far away look in his eye. A sharp pain ran through my throat when I tried to speak and I brought a weak hand to it, having to settle with staring up at him with tears in my eyes.

His clothes were stained with dried blood, likely mine, and he had his injured arm out of his coat's sleeve. By its appearance, he probably got the bullet out and found some cloth somewhere to use as some makeshift gauze.

Without me having to ask, he grabbed a bottle of water at his side and helped me sit up slightly so I could drink. It stung going down, but I knew it was better to feel the pain than to die of dehydration. He pulled away when I motioned and I let my head fall weakly into his lap again, slightly out of breath.

"I'm not the best with words. What I was trying to say before was that you shouldn't feel guilty for just trying to survive."

His eyes were trained back on the fire, but mine were trained on his face, "And you shouldn't feel like a burden for relying on me or the others once in a while."

His jaw clenched and he let his head rest against the stone wall behind him, "And if you ever get the awful fucking idea of killing yourself again..." My tears overflowed when he looked down with as sincere of an expression I've ever seen on his face, "Please talk to someone next time, even if it's not me."

The entire time I was agonizing over how much I wanted to take back our argument while unconscious, he'd been awake, taking care of me and doing the exact same thing.

It still stung like crazy to speak, but I croaked out in a terrible-sounding voice, "Thank you."

Over the next two days, I rested while Sasuke left for hours at a time to hunt and search for supplies. Once I was able to walk, we had to get a move on or else we'd risk not being able to meet everyone else on time in Konoha. Luckily, we only had to walk for a few hours before finally reaching the road and hotwiring a car.

Sasuke had somehow carried me all the way to the border of Yugakure and Oto, which was hours of traveling on foot, and with an injured arm at that.

Since it was only the two of us, we chose to use a smaller car that had good mileage so we wouldn't have to stop as quickly to either siphon some fuel or switch to a new vehicle. After learning our lesson about using the main roads on our way to Oto, the route we were taking back to Konoha was so out of the way that we barely saw any abandoned cars at the side of the road.

"How far away do you think Christmas is?" My voice was still hoarse, but it didn't hurt nearly as much to speak so I tried to fill the silence every once in a while as we traveled.

"Probably like a week or two. Why? Did you ask Santa for something special?"

I was relieved when Sasuke's personality reverted to normal once he realized we both weren't in immediate danger of dying, "As a matter of fact, I did."

He glanced at me with an amused look before focusing back on the road, "And what would that be?"

My lips tugged up into a grin, "Guess!"

"Hold on, give me a hint here. When did you make this oh so special Christmas wish?"

"Just now, duh."

He snickered, "Naturally. Uh….okay, give me a second to think about it."

To be honest, I didn't have a clue what I'd wish for, but wanted to see what he'd guess. The first day after I woke up, the air was so serious and tense between us that we could barely speak to one another. It made me feel a million times better about my sore body that things were back to normal now.

"Tequila." I made a disgusted sound and he laughed, obviously joking.

"How about…makeup? I bet you and Ino wore it before all this."

I shook my head, grinning warmly as I looked down at the blanket covering my legs, "Neither of us have really ever worn much. It gets too hot in Suna anyway." He made an odd sound and I looked over at him with a furrowed brow, "What?"

The Uchiha man shrugged before smirking, "I'm just pleasantly surprised, is all."

A blush rose to my face and I looked back down at my lap as I waited for him to try again. After a few silent moments, he laughed, "I've got it! You wished for a boyfriend."

Rather than making me laugh, like he probably thought he would, I felt weird when he said that. We never really had the "what are we?" talk and didn't even bother discussing it before any of this. I'm not so blind or naive to believe that a guy like him would realistically go for a girl like me in the normal world. The circumstances brought us together and we just so happened to click well.

With that being said, other than jokingly talking about him wanting to see Suna, we haven't spoken a word about what was going to happen at the end of this road. Would we turn left and part ways as though nothing ever happened? Would we turn right and keep in touch once in a while, staying friends? Or would we take the least likely option and go straight to continue acting how we are now even when the universe wasn't forcing us together?

Realizing he was probably going to pick up on my awkwardness, I made myself fake a laugh and retorted in a joking voice, "Yeah, one without black hair!"

His voice was casual as he continued on the topic of dating, "You know, I think Kiba has the hots for you. He doesn't have black hair, either."

I had absolutely no idea how to respond. Sasuke never struck me as the jealous type, but I didn't think he'd want me to look at other guys like that while we're kind of messing around. My eyes danced over to his face before falling back onto my lap.

I felt…disappointed. Perhaps I thought he liked me a bit more than he really did. Maybe I've been taking things too seriously this whole time. How humiliating.

"Kiba, huh? He's cute so maybe I'll give him a shot," and the award for worst actress goes to: me.

Sasuke glanced at me with a slightly irritated look, "It was just a joke, relax."

I frantically waved my hands with as calm a smile as I could muster in my uneasy state, "I'm fine! What're you talking about?"

The car got tense and silent for a long time before I awkwardly tried to change the subject, "Is there something you want for Christmas?" My eyes glazed over as I looked out the window on my side of the car at the thick forest that started at the side of the road.

"I think I'd like to take another bath together."

My eyes widened and I looked over at him in shock, face bright red. He laughed, "What? You wouldn't? C'mon, it sure seemed like you enjoyed yourself."

"O-Of course I did! It's just that…"

He smirked knowingly at me, "We could make a pitstop by my place once we get to Konoha. The compound has tons of backup generators."

Was he…asking me what I thought he was? A week ago I would've agreed without hesitation because that was our plan to begin with, but now…now I wasn't sure. Casually sleeping with Sasuke didn't seem like such a big deal because we were just friends who trusted one another, but somewhere between then and now something changed.

It might've been how he'd obviously turned down my advances the night we got drunk because he didn't want to take advantage of me. Maybe it was how hard he fought to save me while actively being chased and shot at. Perhaps it was the completely vulnerable look on his face when I woke up in the cave for the first time. Whatever the cause, my feelings for him had changed.

Not only would it be unfair to use him like that when he thinks that I see him as just a friend, like he does me, but it'd be like inviting myself to be tortured. He'd undoubtedly be careful and accommodating, which would make me fall for him even more only to have to pretend that everything was fine and casual.

"Hey, we don't have to if you don't want to. I was just offering."

Everything was telling me to refuse because going through with it would only break my heart, but I found myself nodding with a red face instead. We'll probably never see each other again if we manage to right the massive wrong in the world right now. At least it'll be a clean break where I can experience all the suffering at once and eventually move on.