A horrible journey

The doors to the boarding ramp broke off their hinges and fell inwards, startling everyone in the vaulted terminal. Ms. Stubbs stepped out, looking like she was about to die, and wondering why she ever told her therapist that she was ready to go back to work. Her makeup had run into the lines on her face, making her look deathly ill. Her wrinkled jacket hung loosely off of one shoulder, revealing the blouse underneath, irrevocably stained with sweat.

"Three days," she droned pitifully. "Three days on that blasted starliner..."

Ilrica stepped off next with large purple bags underneath her eyes. Her fur was droopy and matted; she had bed head over her entire body. "It was only supposed to be a half-hour flight," she moaned.

"I didn't think a starliner could break down that many times," Ungliss coughed as he floated out, looking like a soggy raincloud.

"They can't."

Ms. Stubbs put her hands on her head. "The stardrive, the hyperspace antennae, broken broken... everything broken."

Zurra stepped out next in her child form, looking like a half-melted candle. Large drops of pink goo dripped off of her and puddled on the floor of the terminal. "At least you guys were up in the front. The bathrooms backed up after the first day, and I was right next to them. It smelled like death! DEATH!" She fell forward and collapsed into a pink puddle.

"Zurra, how can you even have a sense of smell anyway?"

"I wish I didn't," she bubbled.

"They showed the same in-flight movie eighty-seven times," Tiboe groaned as he staggered out, his brown fur stained and patchy. "Howard the Duck... EIGHTY SEVEN TIMES! I feel like it is burned into my retinas! I never want to see any human movie ever again as long as I live!"

Cha'Rolette came out next, her green skin looking pale, her uniform rumpled and stained, and her ringlets hanging down limply behind her. "That is nothing. I was sitting right next to the emergency exit when that stupid grog Trahzi decided to jump outside and make the rest of the trip on her own. If I hadn't put that barrier up we'd have all been turned inside out."

Ms. Stubbs yanked on her staticky hair. "How can a distress beacon break? They can't, they're supposed to be good for centuries!"

Cha'Rolette pulled out a dirty handkerchief. "This is degrading. I shouldn't have to live like this." She threw her head back and gave off a petite little sneeze, causing her ta'atu to shoot straight out like a starfish. The waste bin next to her crumpled like an aluminum can. "Oh look, now I've gone and caught the sniffles."

Gerald came out next, happily munching on a peeled lemon. Cadbury clucked oddly and stumbled sideways, collapsing onto the floor next to him. "Actually, I thought it was a pretty good flight," he admitted.

They are turned and scowled at him.

"What? My last flight took three weeks. This one was much better."

* * *

Ms. Stubbs twitched nervously as she led her exhausted class through the baggage check. "Why is this breaking? Everything breaking... everything's breaking," she kept mumbling to herself as the students retrieved their luggage.

"What is taking so long?" S'Meskle complained after a few minutes, his shell looking discolored and flaky.

"Doesn't everyone have their stuff yet?" Ms. Stubbs asked, her hair popping with electricity.

"Dyson's bag hasn't shown up yet," Tomar grumbled as he leaned against his suitcase, the armpits of his uniform irrevocably stained with sweat.

Ms. Stubbs' eye twitched hysterically. "Oh... Gerald's bag." She turned to look at Gerald, her nostrils flaring.

"Isn't that his bag there?" Kzoyohaan asked, pointing to the turnstile made of light as a final bag flopped down. Not actually a bag anymore, just a shredded corner.

"Well, it used to be my bag," Gerald said, picking it up.

Ms. Stubbs took out a bottle of pills and shook a couple into her hand. "Okay, Dyson, go file a claim at the lost baggage station, the rest of you follow me."

"It's not really lost, more destroyed," Ilrica pointed out.

Gerald pumped his fist. "Sweet, that means I get a new essentials kit." As he ran off to the lost baggage station, with Cadbury zig-zagging after him, the whole class snarled.

"How can that guy be so happy all the time?" Kamanie asked, her hair damp and limp.

"Probably has brain damage or something," Tulda said, her rouge and mascara trailing down her cheeks.

By the time Gerald caught up with everybody with his brand new essentials kit, they were already loaded up onto the charter bus that would take them to the hotel reserved for their trip. The vehicle was long and ridged like an accordion, with bubbled glass domes along the top to give each passenger their own picturesque view. It reminded Gerald of a big caterpillar. Ms. Stubbs stood nervously in the entry ramp, chewing on her fingernails.

"Oh, Dyson," she fidgeted as he approached. Suddenly the melodic humming of the bus' hover engine started to sputter, and the teacher thrust her arms out. "No! Stop! Back up!" she commanded.

Gerald was surprised, but did as he was told. Cadbury didn't notice in time and collided into his leg in a poof of feathers.

As Gerald backed away, the bus' engine returned to a normal humm.

Ms. Stubbs breathed in relief and shook three more pills into her hand.

"Is there a problem?" he asked as she swallowed the pills.

"No," she chuckled fitfully, her eyes twitching. "No problem, just that... I have a special assignment for you... yes... that's right."

"You do?"

"Um, yes. The director wants us to take a bunch of pictures of the class trip for the school net. I'm putting you in charge of it."

She tossed him a small holo-camera. He looked at it, unsure. "Okay, but why me?"

"Because everyone important is going to be busy enjoying themselves."

"I see." Cadbury pecked at the ground fecklessly, not realizing that it was tarocrete and not dirt.

"Get to it," Ms. Stubbs told him. "You can start by taking some pictures on your way to the temple. You know, beautiful things. This is a tourist town, after all."

Before he could protest, she had sealed the door and the bus lifted off. The last thing he saw was Ilrica looking at him through the rear window and sticking her tongue out at him. "Have a nice walk, Dyson," she taunted.

The other students cheered.

A moment later they were just a speck in the distance, and it occurred to Gerald that he had no idea where he was. The bluish sun was rising up in the violet skies of this world. Large floating plant life called weli'hi drifted about lazily in the skies above like little floating islands. Their falling rosy pedals drifted down like a light snowfall.

A short little girl with long blue hair down to her ankles walked up to the ramp near him and tapped a control on her wrist, signaling for a taxi.

"Um, sorry to bother you, miss," he began. He waited for her translator to switch to English before he continued. "I've never been to this world before, could you tell me how to get to the Soeckian Temple?"

"You just take a taxi," she said in a sweet little voice.

"Ah, yes, but let's say I couldn't take a taxi..."

"Why couldn't you take a taxi?"

"Just for argument's sake, let's say I couldn't. How would I walk there?"

She tilted her head. "Who is argument?"

"What?"

"You said, 'for argument's sake,' but who is argument?"

"No, I mean... ugh... just... how do I walk to the Soeckian Temple?"

"With your feet, I would imagine."

Gerald shook his head and chuckled in frustration. "Which way is the temple, can you point towards it?" he asked, trying to simplify the question.

She pointed off into the west.

"Do you know how far it is?"

"About eight parns."

Gerald did a little math in his head. "Okay, eight parns, that's about... eleven miles. I can do that, it's still early."

The girl only watched him oddly.

"Thank you for your help," he said, giving her a thumbs-up.

The girl screamed in terror and slapped him square in the face, knocking him back into a vending machine. Cadbury tried to bury her head in the sand in terror, but only ended up bonking her head into the tarocrete.

"Pervert!" the girl accused as she jumped into her taxi and sped off.