Four

"Don't talk to him."

"Don't lay eyes on him."

"Don't think of him."

"He's dangerous."

Mattie's mothers words replayed inside of her head as she looked at Jaxson from the corner of her eye. He was looking at her with the end of his pen between his teeth, slowly twisting it with slightly hooded eyes.

Part of Mattie wanted to listen to her mother and steer clear of the boy in black, but another part of her, the part that she would keep hidden, wanted to straddle Jaxson right in his seat before bravely throwing the pen from his fingers and kissing his full lips that were practically calling her name.

Her thoughts seemed to cloud her vision, and it finally focused when she turned her head slightly to the side to meet Jaxson's eyes. He winked just then, and Mattie smiled before turning her head back to the front of the classroom.

"For your poetry projects, you may all pick a parter, but I advise that you choose someone that you can concentrate and get work done with." Mr. Hopkins said with his wrinkled hands folded together, and the class instantly flew from their seats to go to their friends.

Mattie hated when the class was told to pick partners, for she didn't have many friends to get paired with. And that was only because she simply didn't have the time to make friends.

Or, that was what she had told herself to feel better.

She then looked up when Tony stepped up in front of her desk with a piece of paper and pencil squeezed in-between his nervous hands. He was a skinny blond with a cardigan and khaki shorts that ended just below his knees.

He would often stare at her as well, but she didn't enjoy it like she did with Jaxson. For Jaxson's stare gave her a wave of confidence, while Tony's gave her a headache.

"Hey Mattie, do you wanna-"

"She's got a partner." Jaxson interrupted Tony by stepping in front of him and setting himself in the chair in front of Mattie, turning it to face her.

Tony looked from Jaxson to Mattie, visibly confused before slowly turning to walk away. Mattie felt sad for him, but at the same time felt happy that Jaxson had chose her instead of the other girls that practically threw themselves at him.

"I thought he told us to pick partners that we can concentrate and get work done with." Mattie challenged, ignoring the stares of the girls around her.

Jaxson's shoulders bobbed up and down with a laugh at her words, and he cocked a brow with a look in his eyes that had Mattie curious to know what wandered inside his dark mind.

"Oh, we can get work done alright." He winked again, and Mattie pushed his shoulder slightly with a laugh in reply.

"Very funny." She hissed in a whisper after tucking a dark strand of hair behind her ear as if someone was listening.

Jaxson focused his eyes behind her just then toward Tony that was now sitting directly behind Mattie with one of his friends.

He looked back at the boy in black only to look away seconds afterward, fear filling his chest. Just what Jaxson wanted.

"You and Tony?" He whispered under his breath, and Mattie's brows pinched together in confusion.

"What? God no." She replied after a moment with a chuckle, meeting Jaxson's eyes that have visibly relaxed.

"Good."

Mattie smiled at his words as her cheeks flooded with color, and he bit his bottom lip at the innocence that took over her. It was an innocence that he wanted to demolish, an innocence that he wanted her to have except for when she was with him.

"He likes you." Jaxson added, remembering the sight of the two of them walking down the hallways together.

He remembered Tony smiling a nervous smile when Mattie said something, and he desperetely wanted to know what was said. More than that though, Jaxson didn't want him around his girl at all. Not ever.

Mattie smiled after noticing the bits of jealousy that spread across Jaxson's features. He tried to hide it, but failed miserably as his eyes fell to his lap.

"I don't like him, though." She replied, watching Jaxson look back up into her eyes that seemed to melt when ever he did so. "I mean, only as a friend." She added.

Jaxson nodded even though he didn't like the fact that they were even friends. For friends could develop into something more, something that only Jaxson wanted with Mattie.

"Why do you bring it up?" She asked curiously just as Jaxson's foolishness caught up with him. He was showing obvious jealousy to a girl that thinks that he's only known her for a week, when really he's known her for far longer.

"Just curious is all." He replied after a moment of hesitation, and Mattie nodded with a smile that had Jaxson wondering if she liked his blooming jealousy; for girls often did.

"Jaxson and Mattie." Mr. Hopkins announced as he walked by Mattie's desk. He hesitated shortly to look at the two with raised brows, appearing visibly surprised.

"Interesting." He added, and Jaxson and Mattie looked at one another with grins. Grins that had each other curious as to how interesting being English partners was really going to be.

___

Mattie's home was quiet.

It contained memories from when she was a little girl. Memories of her crawling on her legs and hands up and down the carpeted stairs with a bright smile upon her freckled cheeks.

Memories of walking hand and hand with her mother out of the back door to plant beautiful flowers in her garden.

Memories of sitting in the living room with cartoons showing from the television after a warm bath drawn by her mother.

Her mother that used to be so full of love and life, but was now full of hatred toward the world and herself.

It all began when Mattie turned ten years old. That was when two men in uniforms knocked on their door to tell her mother that her husband has passed away in the war. Her husband that was also Mattie's father, a father that gave her long hugs and bedtime stories. A father that she never got to say goodbye to.

Then she turned twelve. That was when her mother started to wear dark shades of lipstick and heavy makeup. That was when she started to reek of alcohol at dinner time instead of flowers; and that was when she stopped cooking dinner at all.

She then had begun to bring men home. Men that had wedding rings on, but chose to ignore their vows as they walked up the stairs with her mother. Men that left at two in the morning, but also left bruises on her mothers skin as well. They were bad men, and Mattie knew it as she watched from down the hall with tears down her face.

And then she turned thirteen. That was the age when she watched her mother bring home a man in a suit instead of a man in alcohol stained clothes. It was a good change, all until he had begun to sneak into her bedroom at five in the morning before sneaking a hand down her pants.

That was the age her mother had first yelled at her with makeup staining her cheeks at how it was her fault that she could never be happy. For the man that touched her fled shortly after she screamed for her mother, however, it helped none. For all she did was yell at her own daughter for the disgusting mans mistake.

And after that, she turned fourteen. The age when time froze.

The time when her fathers death really had sunk in, and the time when she realized that her mother was dead as well, but only on the inside.

The time when she looked out the window, only to see her mothers flower garden empty and rid of any life.

The time when she knew that just like the flowers, her life was wilting and dying away with each passing second.

"Mattie, no arguments. You're staying here." Her mother hollered from across the table, shoving another McDonalds French fry passed her lips.

Mattie sighed with her cheek lying against her fist, and picked at her burger with hooded eyes, trying to clear her mind of the memories.

"It's for a project, I need to work with my partner somewhere!" She protested, bravely raising her eyes to meet her mothers death glare.

"Work with her here." She replied, and Mattie rolled her eyes at the assumption she had made about her partner being a she.

"I was thinking more like the library, we need books to look at you know. It's an English project."

"Well you'll just have to check some out and then bring them here." She wiped a blot of ketchup from the corner of her lip, and the look of carelessness upon her caked face caused Mattie to want to scream.

"I'm going to bed." She stood from her chair after a few moments of deafening silence before taking long strides to the stairs that held so many memories; the memories that were now dead and buried along with her father and her mothers soul that used to be so gentle, so kind.

Mattie closed her bedroom door softly, closing her eyes and lying her forehead against the glossy wood afterward with a trembling bottom lip. She refused to let the tears fall this time, though. No matter how hard it was.

After a short minute or two, she turned around swiftly to look at her bed. The bed that she remembered the man in the suit touching her on, the bed she remembered sitting on as her mother screamed at her, the bed she wanted gone.

Her head then moved to her window just as a couple of noises came from it, and the thought of Jaxson brought a bit more light to her mind that was darkening with each painful memory.

She walked over to her window before looking downward to the ground with a smile at the sight of Jaxson with a handful of brown pebbles. She slid the window open quickly, and leaned her head out into the cool night air.

"Romeo romeo, wherefore art thou romeo." Mattie said with a hand on her heart as Jaxson smiled and rolled his eyes.

"I swear to god if I knew the next line I would say it."

"Sure you would." Mattie replied cooly, fighting her smile that felt as if it were growing too widely.

"Just come down here." Jaxson tossed the pebbles onto the grass, setting his large hands on his hips afterward whilst looking up at Mattie that looked like a goddess to Jaxson under the moonlight.

"I can't, my mom.."

"That's why you'll come through your window."

Mattie froze with parted lips and pinched brows. A rush of fear, but also a rush of excitement flooded through her as well at the thought of sneaking through her window to go see a boy. It was something other teenagers did, something normal teenagers did that she never thought she could do herself.

"Jaxson Maddox you must be mental if you think I'm going to jump." Her conscience spoke for her as she took her bottom lip back with her teeth.

"Well it's not like I'm going to let you fall on the ground, c'mon I want to show you something." Jaxson licked his lips that dried from the cold air as he watched Mattie look behind her as if someone was watching her.

He laughed slightly to himself at her innocence, her innocence that he loved, but at the same time wanted to demolish with one touch to her skin.

"Alright- okay lets do it." Mattie pushed every bad thought out of her mind before turning around to walk to her bed. She stuffed her pillow under her blanket like she saw in movies to make the parents think they were peacefully in their beds before flipping off her light switch and flooding the room with darkness.

"I'm growing old here." She heard Jaxson holler from below her window.

"What if you miss me and I break something."

"I won't miss. I promise." He held his arms out, and Mattie took in the thought of his strong arms wrapping around her body. It was a thought that had her excited, but yet scared that she would be too heavy, or too-

"Mattie, I'll catch you." He repeated softly in a comforting tone, and she nodded slowly, forgetting every unnecessary thought while slowly lifting a foot out of the window.

"Oh god, I guess I am afraid of heights." Mattie said in a shaky tone as she looked down to the ground that seemed to appear lower than before.

"You're stalling." Jaxson cracked a smile.

"Okay, okay." She took a deep breath in and out before closing her eyes and lifting her second foot out so that she was sitting on her windowsill.

Her eyes remained closed, and all she found herself thinking about was Jaxson's arms wrapping around her. And when she finally gained the courage to fall, that was exactly what happened.

Out of instinct, her arms wrapped around Jaxson's neck as his wrapped around her back, and her head laid itself on his chest as her wild breaths tried to calm down. As for Jaxson, he closed his eyes to appreciate every living second of it.

"Told you I wouldn't miss." He whispered in her ear, and she released her hold from his neck before looking into his eyes. His eyes that bore into hers, hers that were then welled up in the same tears that she was holding back just ten minutes before.

His heart dropped at the sight of Mattie with tears filling her eyes. It was much different seeing it up close than from window to window, it was more saddening. For he wanted her to smile, especially when she was with him.

"Mattie, are you hurt?" Jaxson asked with worry filling his eyes that didn't blink once from fearing that she would vanish with one split second of darkness.

She shook her head in reply, not wanting to release her arms from around the warm skin of his neck.

"It's nothing," she answered. "Its just, it never works when I try to hold it back."

Jaxson remembered the times he had seen her crying in her bedroom. She would often have her face pressed into her white pillow, and even though he could not hear her, he knew sobs were escaping from her lips.

"Then don't."

Mattie closed her eyes after hearing his whispered words, and he watched with a heavy heart as another hot tear fell down her cheek and down the curve of her lips.

"Come here." He placed his large hand on the back of her neck before pulling her to him, and she buried her face in the crook of his neck while admiring the sudden contact from a boy that she has never experienced before. It was a feeling that had her weak at the knees, but Jaxson's hold on her kept her up on her feet.

There was the mental hold that he had on her, just as the one that she had on him. It was like a rope was tied around the two. It held them together, but was painful to separate.

A comfortable silence sunk in between them, and Mattie's light sobs that she tried to maintain vibrated against Jaxson's skin. Her tears wet his neck, but he didn't mind, he welcomed it.

"Come on, let's get you away from here for a while." He whispered in her ear, feeling her nod against him afterward.

He looked at her eyes that were ringed with red and her cheeks that were moist with tears, and it made him feel a type of way that he only experienced when he was a mixture of angry and upset.

Angry for who ever caused her tears, and upset for her tears.

They walked through his front yard slowly, not caring about who saw any longer.

Mattie wiped her last tear with the heel of her hand as Jaxson's fingertips pressed slightly deeper into the skin of her hip. She loved his touch, and even found it lingering when he released his arm from around her.

"But, my mom-"

"Don't think of her, don't think of anyone right now." He paused for a moment, falling into her eyes that he's already desperately fell for. "Just follow me."

She took in his words in silence, nodding in reply and ignoring her minds protests to turn her head towards her bedroom window.

And instead, she kept her eyes and mind on Jaxson.

His rough hands on her smooth ones collided together as Jaxson guided her towards the dark streets that were only lit by the yellow street lights.

It was a mystery to her as to where he was taking her, but she also couldn't help but be silently excited. For anywhere with the mysterious boy would be exciting.

About twenty minutes of walking passed, and all the two talked about were things not involving their daily lives. For reality that's what they desired to forget for the night.

They spoke about their interests. Jaxson said nothing except that he likes to draw dark landscapes, but Mattie went on and on.

She liked dancing and writing, not to mention cooking and baking whenever she had time to kill.

She said her homes kitchen was always filled with baked goods made by herself.

It varied from cakes to cookies, and even to brownies, which was a favorite that her mother had stopped making for her after bad times erupted her life like a lava-spilling volcano.

The only thing Jaxson could think of for his interests was drawing, music and the girl next door that he loved so much. He didn't tell her that last one for obvious reasons.

"Here it is." He said, pointing at a small apartment complex. Mattie's brows pinches together in confusion.

"You took me," she hesitated, "to an apartment complex." Mattie told him in a worried tone, regretting her decision to follow Jaxson by the second.

"It's what's in it that matters, come on." He walked across the empty street that led to the complex, and then to a broken piece of wooden fence.

He lifted two lines of fence and quietly and squeezed through before turning to look at her through them, still holding her hand.

"Jaxson, I don't know." Mattie said quietly, afraid that somebody was watching them practically break the law by trespassing.

"I do it all the time, just trust me." He sent her a comforting smile, and it sent a feeling through her body that made her want to do anything as long as it were with him.

Why was he making me feel like this? She thought.

She lightly nodded and went through the two pieces of broke fence before looking at the sight before her.

It was a swimming pool.

There was colored lights in the pool, making the water change colors. It varied from blue, to red, and even to purple before starting all over again.

The calm water moved along with the soft wind, and the sight was beautiful to Mattie. To Jaxson though, it was only beautiful when she had stood next to it.

The way her eyes lit up with the colors of the pool each time it changed, the way her eyes widened when she saw it, as if she'd never seen anything like it before.

And to Mattie's shock, Jaxson was slipping his dark T-shirt off, revealing his toned body that had her weak at the knees.

"What are you-"

"Take a guess." He interrupted and smiled at her, throwing his shirt to the concrete ground before taking a full speed run towards the glistening pool.

Water splashed into the air as Jaxson plunged into the pool, and Mattie found herself laughing as cool water splashed upon her face and clothes.

"Your turn." He hollered in a high toned whisper so that no real residents would hear.

"What? I don't have a bathing suit." Mattie replied, crossing her arms and laughing quietly to herself.

"Neither did I, just jump in and I'll give you my dry shirt to wear."

Mattie looked at the pool and at Jaxson. His dark hair was deliciously down his forehead and water trickled down his tanned face in a way that had her breathless.

After a few moments of debating to herself about whether or not she had the guts to jump in the pool, she did exactly that right into Jaxson's arms.

____