438. Chapter 438

After Deep in Death

Episode 2.01

By

UCSBdad

Disclaimer: I'm deep in not owning Castle. Rating: K Time: See above.

"Castle? I'll see you tomorrow."

Castle smiled and turned away, happy that he'd see Kate Beckett another day.

"Castle?"

He turned around to look at her. She sat there at her desk, looking at him but not saying a word. He stood there, wondering what she wanted. After a minute, he walked back to her desk and sat. Still, she said nothing.

He wasn't sure what he could, or should, say after he had apologized. He finally decided to continue his apology. "The only thing that would hurt me more than losing our partnership would be to have the chance to take your pain away and not take that chance."

He thought he saw a ghost of a smile in her eyes. He continued. "I had a friend look…." He began before he remembered his promise to Montgomery.

She put up her hand to stop him. "No. I don't want to hear it. I meant what I said, Castle. I'm a homicide cop, remember? I know how hard a ten year old murder would be to solve. Physical evidence has been cleaned up and sent to a landfill years ago, witnesses have moved away, grown old and died, or can't remember a thing. I was perfectly serious in what I said. Even thinking about getting back into my mom's murder makes me sick to my stomach. I do not want to know what you found, or think you found, because it won't lead to anything except the chance I'd be right back in that rabbit hole. But I want you to tell me if you looked into her murder for the book? To make …"She couldn't say the name. "…your detective more authentic. Did you?"

Castle shook his head. "No. Beckett, if I had wanted the information for the book, I would never have told you about it. And, I'm a writer of fiction. If I had put anything that I had found into the book, I'm smart enough to disguise it. The victim would be Nikki's old boyfriend from high school and he would have been hit over the head with a beer bottle in a bar brawl. The detective investigating it would have attributed it to an assassination by Islamic fundamentalists of a British secret agent. You would never have connected it to your mom's death."

Kate smiled in spite of herself. "You're right. You never would have told me if you were thinking…" She stopped. "What were you thinking, Castle? You hurt me worse than I've been hurt in a very long time. You knew what that would do to me. Why?"

Castle smiled back. "I come in here every day. I see you at your desk when I get here and, more often than not, you're still here when I leave. I have been constantly amazed at the depth of your commitment, your compassion, your abilities, your concern, and your dedication. You are truly a remarkable woman, Detective. But every once in a while, your mask slips and I see the pain that you live in because of her death. I see what becoming a cop to solve her murder and then not being able to do so has cost you. And it's cost you more than I can comprehend. How could I not want to try to take that pain away?"

Kate looked away for a second. "Actually, a lot of people didn't want to help me take that pain away. There was my training officer when I got out of the academy, and now you."

"No one else?"

She shook her head slowly. "Most of my friends and family think I should put it behind me. Which I have." She looked him in the eyes. "I can understand, a little, why you did this. It still hurts me and I'm still mad at you, but you were trying to help. I accept that. So, thanks for trying and don't ever do that again, or I will never forgive you. Okay?"

"Okay."

"See you tomorrow, Castle."

He almost made it to the ground floor when Lanie caught up with him. "No you don't, Writer Boy. We need to finish the conversation we had in the ambulance before we were so rudely interrupted by the body snatchers."

Lanie led Castle to a quiet corner of her office where he explained what Dr. Murrray had found.

"Can I have a copy of the reports?" The ME asked.

"Why?"

"Because I'm an ME and I'm her friend."

"Okay, but you can't tell Beckett anything at all about this. I talked to Montgomery and gave him the originals, but I have copies. Montgomery said that detectives can't handle a case they have any personal interest in, so he asked another precinct to handle it. Plus, Montgomery is afraid that after ten years, the information Dr. Murray found won't lead anywhere, but that Beckett will take it and go right down that rabbit hole."

Lanie nodded. "You like her, don't you? You like her a lot."

Castle had a denial on his lips, but it got no further. "She remarkable."

"Okay, I won't say a word to her. I met her just as she was recovering from her year of therapy. She was…" Lanie didn't finish the sentence.

Detectives Jerry Okanowski and Gus Stavros sat in a bar not far from where Johanna Beckett had been stabbed to death.

"What a waste of time."Okanowsky bitched." Investigating murders that took place ten years ago? Doesn't the captain think we have real work to do?"

Stavros laughed. "What are you bitching about? We look at four murders, write a report and we can spend the rest of our time here."

Okanowski shook his head. "Fourteen more months and I can pull the pin. I can't wait."

Stavros nodded. "Well, while you're freezing your ass off in New York, I'll be in Florida watching the Grapefruit League and getting a tan."

"Lucky bastard. Just for that you can buy the next round.'

While they talked, they didn't notice a very inconspicuous man paying very close attention to the effort they were not putting into solving the murder of Johanna Beckett.

Captain Roy Montgomery got out of his car and looked around the parking garage. Seeing no one around, he pulled out the burner phone and called that number again. "The investigation is over. Like I said, they found nothing."

"I know." The voice on the other end said. "But what about Beckett?"

"She doesn't know. I told Castle that the investigation went nowhere. And I told him never to tell Beckett about it. And he won't. He likes her, a lot."

There was a long silence on the other end of the line. "All right, Roy. But we'll be keeping an eye on everyone involved in this. Everyone." He hung up.

Roy Montgomery sighed and went back to his car. I dodged a bullet. We all did. If I can just keep it that way, she'll be safe. She and Castle like each other. I hope to god something comes of that. Maybe that'll keep her out of trouble if she has something or someone else.

Kate Beckett sat on her couch and looked at the photo of Richard Castle on the back of Storm Fall. She smiled and ran her hand over the picture. He's very good. He's helped me solve too many cases to just let him walk away. And he's not what I thought he was. No, that's wrong. He is selfish, immature and reckless. But he is more than that. I do believe that he looked at Mom's case in a misguided attempt to help me. I am still hurt and I am still mad. But I know that he could only have hurt me if I cared about him. And he makes things more fun. I need fun. But what else is there with me and Castle? Anything? I just don't know.