32. Chapter 32

When Dashiell wakes up for good, the television is just right. He opens his eyes and sees the glow on the ceiling and the flickers it makes. He has two things to do. First, he sits up and turns off the television because it's just for morning times. Second he gets out of bed and walks through the bathroom between their rooms. He's allowed to do this. Mommy showed him where she plugged in the night light and where he can get up and go if he has to go.

Daddy says whiz sometimes. It's funnier to say whiz, but Daddy says that's not a word for Mommies. Daddy also says - just sometimes - take a dump. And that's funnier because he has a dump truck and Ms. Kim at preschool has a dump cake, but those two things have nothing to do with the dump Daddy is talking about.

Dash likes the words. He likes to know the words people use that mean the same thing but they aren't the same.

Second, he gets to walk between the rooms using the bathroom as a kind of secret passageway. Daddy has a secret passageway at his bar down in the basement office; Dash has gotten to peek inside and go in a little ways with Daddy, but not often. He would like to be there more times, but Daddy says there are rats and mutant pet alligators. Dash almost believes him but then, it's Daddy. If Mommy said it, then he would know for sure.

Still, he would like to see a mutant pet alligator. He would like to ride one.

Dash slips through the door and into the sun-lightened room his sister sleeps in. She doesn't mind the way the air has little quivers that show up in the sun. She doesn't need it dark to sleep, dark and close and a relief of not seeing.

When he creeps up to her bed, she's already awake.

"Ellie," he whispers, putting his face close to hers.

His little sister turns her head and grins. "Dash. Uppie?"

"Yeah. If you get up, then I can too. You're done sleepin' right?"

"Done."

He grins back at her as she holds her arms up for him. Dash gets his hands under her armpits and heaves her up and out, then down the side of the bed until they both fall back on the floor. Oof. She's too big.

Ellie giggles against him and gets to her hands and knees, scrambles up. She has to push her hair out of her face with both hands. Dash rolls up too, and remembers that number three on the list, if number two is good, then number three is taking off his pajamas and putting on clothes (he gets to pick them out). And after three, that means he can go find Mommy and Daddy for four. Four is his favorite number.

Until he's five. Then things will need five rules. Because five will be best.

"Castle," Ellie says, pushing on him.

"No sand castles. 'Member? We gots to find costume stuff. I'm gonna be a space cowboy like Daddy."

"I gonna be Mommy." Ellie points her finger at him and shoots, pwew, pwew.

"Yup. But I don't think Mommy will like it if you get a gun. Even if it's a toy, Ellie." He needs to warn her so she's not disappointed when Mommy says no. Mommy doesn't like weapons in the house, but Daddy says swords and light sabres and laser beam guns are necessary. So Mommy says no guns that look like real guns.

But Mommy has a real gun. She took it apart and put it back together in front of him and Ellie on the couch. Daddy was sitting beside him with Ellie in his lap, and Mommy and Daddy were very serious and he can't ever ever touch it. Mommy said it can hurt like fire; she showed him where it hurt her. It is just for cops to use to keep bad people from using them.

But Mommy was the one who bought him a nerf gun with the balls that shoot out, so nerf guns must not look like real guns, and also Mommy must be okay with those too. He also got a dart gun once from Allie, who always brings him cool stuff.

"But I can have shoes?"

Dash thinks about that. "Not Mommy's shoes. Too big for you to walk around in and do trick or treating and stuff."

Her mouth turns, her smile pointing down. "I want shoes."

He sighs. "Maybe if you say shoes. Mommy is happy when you talk to her. Then maybe you can get some shoes like Mommy's. Just for little babies and not mommies."

"Not a little baby."

"Yeah you are. When you don't talk, you act like a baby."

"I not a baby." She sets her mouth in a line that means she's either going to cry or yell at him. She doesn't cry much, but it's bad when she does. She bit him once. He doesn't want her to bite. Also, he doesn't really want her to yell at him because she yells in his ear and she gets high up there and it hurts.

"Okay, okay. But you are little. And *I* know you're not a baby 'cause we talk. And I know what you mean."

She scrunches up her face in a twist and her eyes get narrow. Mad then. Not gonna cry. But mad at him. She don't like being called little.

"Okay. But I can say you're little because you're my little sister. See? It works like that."

"You big?"

"Yes. I'm almost five. You're only two."

"Almost three."

"Not almost. It has to be in your month to be almost."

"What my month?"

"December. It's Christmas, 'member? That's you. Me. I'm Halloween. October. That's right now. So I'm almost five."

"I almost three."

"Not yet, baby girl."

Her eyes get big and her mouth opens and he knows he's done it now. Dash claps a hand over her mouth and shushes her.

"No, no, no, Ellie. Shh. You'll get me in trouble."

She jerks away from him. "Yes. Trouble. You in trouble."

"No. Ellie," he whines. "I'll play Barbies with you after we find our costumes. And I'll tell Mommy you want shoes. Don't scream. You hurt my ears."

She crosses her arms over her chest and turns her head, deciding. He shifts back and forth on his feet and then realizes he needs to -

Whiz.

That will do it. "Hold that thought, Ellie. I gotta whiz."

She giggles and claps two hands over her eyes as he turns to go back to the bathroom.

"Hey, we gotta get dressed too. That's the third rule. Then we go find Mommy and Daddy."

"Shoes."

"Yeah pick stuff out." Dash gets to stand up to whiz. He grins but he gets tangled up in his pajama pants, so he's got to strip those off and then his spiderman underwear too. Daddy says it's very very important to aim. So he has to concentrate.

Ellery comes through the door with clothes and dumps them in the floor. Dash flushes and then puts back on his spideys and climbs up onto the sink counter. Ellie jumps up and down trying to climb up too.

"You stay down there, Ellie."

"I wash hands."

"You have to whiz first."

"Girls whiz?"

"Um." Do girls whiz? Maybe not if they don't get to stand up. "I'll ask Daddy."

"Can I whiz?"

"Let me wash my hands. You pee."

Ellery sighs at him and bounces over to the toilet. She always is bouncing and jumping and crawling through small small spaces. She likes to take stuff, but she doesn't take his stuff (or not all the times, just some of the times), because it's his stuff and not hers. But she does find Mommy's things and put them in a place that's hidden. She will take Daddy's too, but Daddy doesn't really mind, so Ellie doesn't always have to.

He tugs up the faucet and sticks his hands under. The soap is the clear liquid kind even though he told Mommy he doesn't like it. He needs foam to kill the whiz germs. But Mommy says it works. She's usually right. That will be okay for now.

Dash pushes off the water and shakes his hands out, flinging water over the mirror. He catches sight of himself and grins, flapping his hands to watch the water go all over. His hair is sticking up where it's growing out too long and being curly. Mommy likes his curls. It makes him like them too, even though it's not in order.

"Done!"

He turns back and sees Ellie with her hands raised, all her pjs off and just her Dora the Explorer underwear on.

"Flush it."

She turns and hops to the handle, jumps to push it down, then hope back to the sink. "I a rabbit."

"You're not a rabbit."

"I a Roo."

"Like on Winnie the Pooh?"

She nods.

"Okay, Roo," he sighs, rolling his eyes at her. "Can you climb? Or do I need to jump down there and let you crawl on my back?"

"Back! Dashy on the back!"

"Not Dashy. Ew. That's like a baby name." He stands up and swings his arms, bends his knees, and jumps down. His feet slap the tile and he flails his arms to keep standing as his bones sting. "Yowie, yowie."

"You not hurt. Back."

He sticks his tongue out at her and dries his hands off on his pajamas in the floor, then gets down on his hands and knees in front of the sink. "Crawl up, Ellie."

She gets a knee on his back and her hands clutch around his neck, then she wriggles around and stands up, bouncing.

"Don't bounce," he growls at her. "You break me, crazy girl."

She giggles and gets on her tiptoes; he can hear the water come on and he wriggles too, trying to shake her off. She shrieks and grabs the counter loudly, clamping both hands down on it, her knees banging against the cabinets. "No, Dash."

"I'll stop," he laughs. "Hurry up."

She goes back to washing her hands, humming, and he feels water drop on his back before she turns the water off again and then drops back down on him.

"Ouch," he growls. But she only giggles at him and puts her hands over his eyes, her giggle loud in his ear. "Get off me now. Stepstool is done."

"I a ghost. Wooooo."

"You're not a ghost."

"I a. . .a. . .um. . .don't know."

"You're a girl. And sometimes a puppy dog. And sometimes a baby-"

She slaps her hand on his back and jumps off. He gets up and pushes her into her room, kicking her clothes after her. "Put these on. I gotta find some too."

Dash heads back for his drawers. His spideys are clean because he got them after his bath. No, it was a shower. He took a shower yesterday and it wasn't as terrible as it usually is. Also Ellie was there and he had to be her big brother. So he couldn't yell out when the water got sharp.

But it wasn't really that sharp. Mommy knows how to make it softer.

Dash tugs on the bottom drawer and finds his pants and shorts and stuff. Daddy packed him up, so it's the fun stuff. He finds his pirate pants, the one with the patches on the knees that Allie put on for him. He pulls them out and wriggles into them, sticks out his tongue to concentrate on the button and zipper.

Pirate pants means a striped shirt. He needs his black and white one, but that's at home. Maybe he needs-

"I all done!"

He turns and Ellie is in his doorway with her hands on her hips. She's wearing her striped leggings with her pink skirt pulled over it and a blue tshirt that Daddy got her. It has an owl on one side and a ghost on the other and it says Boo Hoo.

"What my shirt say?"

"I told you already-"

"Telllllll me, 'gain."

"It says Boo Hoo."

She giggles and pats her chest, stroking the owl and the ghost. "I a ghost. Boo Boo." She giggles again and shakes her head. "But I not hurt. No boo boo."

"Or an owl. Hoo hoo."

"Where your shirt?"

"Stop talking like a baby."

She glares at him.

"I'm looking for a shirt. I need a pirate shirt." He digs through the next drawer up, looking for something that will be right.

Ellie peers over his shoulder. "This one."

She reaches past him and tugs out a grey tshirt.

"No, that's my high-five tshirt. I wear that on my birthday. I need one to be a pirate with."

"This?" She flings the grey one over her head and pulls out a white one. "Boat on it."

Dash picks up the grey shirt and puts it back in the drawer, then laughs when he sees the white one she picked out. He grabs it and pulls it on over his head. "It's not a boat. It's Noah on the ark."

"What he doing with the horsey?"

"Stop baby-talking. And it's not a horse. It's a unicorn."

"He pushing-"

"He is pushing."

"He *is*" - she growls and glares at him - "pushing out the unicorn. Can a unicorn swim?"

"Nope. We don't got unicorns any more-"

"Why?"

"It's supposed to be funny. But it's not funny when I have to explain everything."

Ellie crosses her arms again and narrows her eyes at him. Mommy looks like that too. But Ellie's isn't good enough.

"Come on, Ellie. Let's go find Mommy and Daddy. I wanna get my space cowboy stuff."

"Shoes."

"Yeah. You get shoes." He takes her hand, tugging it out from her pout, and pulls her towards the door.

He twists open the door knob and leads them out into the hallway, feeling a rush of air that startles him.

Ellie moves on ahead, but he runs to catch up to her, overtaking her. He's the big brother; he goes first.

"Mommy?"

When he calls out, he sees them move on the balcony, Mommy standing up from the chair and Daddy's hand in hers. Mommy steps back inside the condo and laughs.

"Ella, baby girl, did you pick out your clothes?"

Dash squeezes Ellie's hand and she nods.

"Mommy, we're starving. And ready for costumes."

Daddy comes inside too and hunches down like a big bear, then growls and grabs Dash and Ellie in a beastly hug, tight and growly and his prickly cheeks rubbing against Dash's face. He laughs out loud, hearing Ellie giggle like crazy next to him, and he pushes on Daddy's chest to get away.

"Oh no, the big bad wolf is eating you up," Daddy growls and does the nom nom nom noise against Dash's arm and neck and Ellie's too so that Dash is giggling so hard he can't breathe.

Ellie gasps. "Mommy, save me!"

And Dash feels Ellie getting plucked out of Daddy's arms and saved, but he keeps laughing too hard to breathe or ask to be saved too, but it doesn't matter because this is the funnest part, Daddy grabbing him tight and not letting go, Daddy making wolf noises and making it funny and not scary.

"You can't escape; I will get all you little kids-"

Dash shrieks as Daddy tickles now, hard on his knees, and he writhes and pulls away, eyes falling open as he arches back to see Ellie with her arms clamped around Mommy's neck just like when she hugged him too, and Mommy is laughing and pulling away from Daddy, but it's the good kind, with all the smiles, and everyone, everyone, is having the best kind of sunshiney day.