113. Chapter 113

The first time she’s late for a date, there are tears in her throat and fear in her eyes.

“I am so sorry, Maggie, there were some complications on a mission – “

“Was anyone hurt?”

Alex feels the concern in Maggie’s eyes like a punch to her gut, because no, no one was hurt, and because no one was hurt, there’s really no excuse, and god can’t she ever do anything right, Maggie doesn’t like to leave a lady waiting but Alex did because god of course she did she’s always messing up everything.

“No, no, everyone’s… fine.”

A warm smile passes over Maggie’s face and her hand moves to Alex’s face in relief. “Good. Good. Here, come here, let me take your jacket – “

“You’re not mad?”

“Alex, why would I be mad?”

“I was late.”

“Alex. The jobs we have, the lives we lead? A little thing I’d like to call traffic? It’s gonna happen. To both of us. It’s okay. You’re okay. You’ve got nothing to apologize for, Alex: you were off saving the world.”

The look in her eyes seems genuine; the way her thumb strokes the back of Alex’s hands seems sincere; her words seem honest.

Alex has never been so confused.

She finds herself confused again the first time she cums without warning, with just a harsh breath and Maggie’s name strangling out of her throat, before Maggie has the chance to cum, too.

“I’m sorry,” she breathes raggedly, tears back in her wind pipe and eyes stinging as she hides her face in Maggie’s shoulder.

“Babe, what – why are apologizing?”

“I… you weren’t… you didn’t… I…”

“Alex, I want you to enjoy yourself, I want you to cum. As many times as you want. Before me, after me, with me, all of the above, whatever.”

“But – “

“Alex. Babe. Ally, you’re perfect. You’re perfect, and I never want you to apologize for enjoying yourself. I’m not having sex with you so I can off, Al, I’m having sex with you because I lo – because I wanna make you feel good, I want… I wanna make you feel good. Please don’t apologize for that. You don’t have to, ever. Okay?”

She doesn’t understand, not even in the slightest, but she trusts, so she nods, and she cums even harder next time.

She doesn’t understand, either, when Maggie brings over Thai takeout when Alex had tried to surprise her by getting pizza, and instead of getting irritated, Maggie kisses each of her knuckles while she panics, because I was just trying to be a good girlfriend, you said you had a long day, but now you spent all this extra money and I should have just told you I was getting pizza, I’m sorry and she doesn’t understand when Maggie finishes kissing her knuckles and brings her hands to her face and strokes her cheeks until she quiets, until she just stares, until Maggie has the room to tell her that you are so sweet, Alex Danvers. And you get all the girlfriend awards, you know why? Because I’ve never once told a girlfriend ‘hey, I’ve had a rough day’ and had them get me dinner. And you? You did that. You’re thoughtful, and you’re sweet, and you’re an amazing girlfriend. You’re perfect, Alex. You don’t have to apologize for being who you are. Not anymore. And certainly not to me.

And Alex cries, then, because Maggie had said it, said it so perfectly: she was apologizing for being… her. And Maggie didn’t want her to, because Maggie liked her. For her.

And that’s nothing to apologize for.