243. Chapter 243

She has no idea how she wound up on top.

She just knows that Maggie’s body is soft and Maggie’s body is pliant and Maggie is moaning encouragingly, her hands firm but tentative on Alex, and maybe that’s why she wound up on top, because Maggie is being so careful with her, and she wants more, fuck, and god Maggie tastes like scotch and just a hint of earl grey and something Alex can’t quite identify, but she wants to spend as long as it takes to investigate properly, and Maggie is suddenly grabbing at her hips at moaning louder, harder, her head tossed back in surprised ecstasy, and Alex has never been this turned on but she can’t figure out why Maggie’s responding like this until her body tenses up and she realizes.

Realizes that she’d opened her legs for the woman beneath her, realizes that Maggie’s knee is slightly bent and her heel is planted firm down on the mattress so that when Alex moves her hips – and god, she hadn’t realized she was moving her hips like that – there’s a firm, sweet, indescribably perfect pressure on her clit from Maggie’s thigh, even through the denim they’re both sporting, and it’s the hottest thing she’s ever felt because every cell in her body is on fire, but now that she’s realized that she’s been grinding down on Maggie’s thigh, a lump forms in her throat and redness rises to her chest and her face and she freezes, freezes, freezes.

Because nothing’s ever been about her pleasure before. Nothing’s ever been about her being able to let go, being able to take what she wanted, and god, she’s never wanted anything like this.

So her body is frozen and her face is beet red and Maggie’s glazed eyes are looking up, are focusing, and her hands are reaching to smooth Alex’s hair out of her burning face, away from her suddenly stinging eyes.

“Did I hurt you, Alex? I’m sorry, I’m so sorry, I didn’t want to pressure you, I didn’t – ”

But Alex is shaking her head profusely. “No, no, Maggie, you didn’t – you – I just…” She chews on the inside of her cheek and can’t quite meet Maggie’s eyes, so she doesn’t see it when a heady mixture of realization, compassion, rage, and affection does battle for dominance on her face, in her eyes.

Affection wins.

“Alex, are you… are you embarrassed?”

She can’t look at her. She can’t. She just nods, and tries desperately not to cry, because god, what’s sex going to be like for Maggie if she even fails at making out? She’ll probably leave, it’ll be so bad, if she won’t leave now.

“Alex… can you look at me?” Alex almost shakes her head, but Maggie’s voice is soft, and her hands are gentle, and her body is already becoming home, and Alex is a DEO agent, for chrissake, so she forces her wet eyes to look down and meet Maggie’s soft ones.

“Listen Danvers, I… you’re perfect. What you were doing, grinding down on me like that? It felt good?”

Alex blushes at least three shades deeper, which Maggie didn’t think possible, but she nods, and Maggie can’t help but smile.

“Good. It’s supposed to. I… I want you to feel good, Alex. I want you to take what you want from me, I want…” She sighs and leans up on one elbow and pauses halfway to Alex’s face, and Alex gives her a trembling, almost-but-not-quite-disbelieving smile and leans down further to meet her lips softly.

Both of their eyes stay closed, their foreheads touching, for a long moment after their kiss ends.

“Alex, I care about you, I care about your… pleasure. And it was hot. You grinding down on my thigh like that. Did you not… notice?”

Alex bites her lip and stares down at Maggie’s tentative smile, growing more confident with each of Maggie’s words, with the shyness that’s suddenly coming over Maggie’s features.

“I noticed,” she rasps almost cautiously, and Maggie gulps.

“Wanna… get back to it, then, Danvers?”

Alex’s response is in the force of her kiss and the upturn of her lips; the gentle power of her touch and the low moan that rises in concert with Maggie’s when she lets herself, simply, enjoy.