628. Chapter 628

When she was a child, she had faith in a lot of things.

Her parents.

Rao’s teachings.

The fundamental goodness of Krypton.

Kindness.

Compassion.

Forgiveness.

That everything works out for the best.

After her planet died, a lot of that faith changed.

Somehow, not all of it evaporated. But a lot of it… morphed.

After she came out as Supergirl – after attack after attack after attack after attack – some of it evaporated.

The faith in her parents.

The belief in Krypton’s inherent goodness.

Her faith in herself.

But other faiths had sprung up.

Well, one, really.

Faith in Alex.

The one faith that never had shaken.

Not ever.

Not for a moment.

And she needed that faith – Alex’s faith in her, because this kind of faith was the kind that went to ways – more than ever.

More than ever, as she closed the door to her apartment and dropped to her knees.

Dropped to her knees because she hadn’t thought about those prayers in years, but there they were, rolling off the lips of a man who would destroy an entire block full of people just to test his own hubris, just to gain more followers, just to…

It didn’t matter.

They were there, and they were etching scars into her heart.

Opening wounds she’d thought were scars.

Creating new ones.

She needed Alex, but she didn’t text her.

Alex had enough on her mind, she didn’t need…

“Kara. Kara, I know you’re home, just open the door. Please, Kara.”

Her heart leaped against her will.

Alex’s faith. Constant.

Steady.

All she needed.

She shoved off of her knees, turned, and tugged at the door.

Her sister’s arms immediately wrapped her up. Her sister’s arms immediately made her… safe.

“Talk to me,” Alex murmured after a long, long, silent while.

Kara just sighed.

“Kara,” Alex whispered, pulling back so she could brush the hair out of her sister’s face. “I’m here.”

“You always are,” Kara smiled shakily as she headed over to the couch. She got nervous when Alex didn’t follow.

“Rocky road,” she said simply as she tugged open the freezer, and Kara smiled.

Her faith in Alex really had never let her down.

“Talk to me,” Alex asked again once Kara had half a pint in her stomach.

Kara sighed and rested her head on Alex’s shoulder.

“I just… those words, those prayers… that symbol… I thought I was the only one who knew them. In the whole world.” She shuddered. Alex pulled her closer. “In the whole universe. Because my people… and if I was ever going to hear those words again, it should have been… but he took them and he turned them into something evil… Alex, there were children. The boy who set that fire off, he was just… he was just a boy. But he really thought he was doing it for… for me.”

Alex sighed and nodded quietly, wiping her sister’s tears and holding her as close as she could.

“Dad said he did all that horrible stuff he did for me, too. I know it’s not the same, but I… it’s not your fault, Kara.”

“But he really believed it, Alex, you know? He actually believed that even after we defeated him, he… he’d given me purpose. That his purpose was fulfilled, that… that he’d been right all along.”

“Was he?” Alex asked, and it was gentle, but Kara stiffened.

“I just meant…. what did you text me earlier? That he’d wanted to bring you clarity? Do you feel like you have that, now? More than earlier?”

Kara sighed and she took Alex’s pint and chomped into it. Alex knew better than to protest.

“I guess so? But not because of him. Remember… remember when I told you I need your faith, more than the cape or my family’s crest?”

Alex beamed softly in answer.

“I guess… I guess it’s because you are my family. But my religion… it’s disorienting. Because what does a religion mean if no one’s alive to keep it up? And then he was, and it felt… it felt good, but it was terrible, because he was wrong, but at least… at least Rao’s name was in the world, for a moment, you know? But it was so evil, so twisted, so perverted from the kindness I grew up associating with our gods… I’m not making sense – “

“You are. You’re making sense, Kara. And even if you weren’t. You don’t need to make sense all the time. You can just… feel.”

A long silence followed, with nothing but the soft sounds of Kara eating Alex’s ice cream and Alex running her finger’s through her sister’s hair.

“Alex?”

“Mm?”

“Thank you. For letting me just feel. I don’t think I’m done feeling. Or rambling. But for now, can we just… be?”

Alex smiled and reached her hand around both their bodies to grab the throw blanket. She wrapped both of them in it and grabbed the remote control.

“Shall we just be with a musical background?” she asked, and Kara smiled through a mouthful of ice cream.

Because this is the kind of faith that felt utterly uncorruptible. That felt like it would just always… be.