Chapter 38: Sealed

Chapter 38: Sealed

I didn't know how long I cried or how long we stayed in that position. With him hugging me and me leaning on his shoulder to cry since his chest was wounded.

But I didn't hear any complains or felt any annoyance from him. He just stayed with that tiring position and I'm starting to get worried at the wound on his chest.

"Let's get you treated first. It might become infected--"

"Emily, I can take care of that later. But for now, can we talk? As much as possible, I would want you to share those burdens with me, especially if it's too heavy to carry."

"No, let's get your wound treated first. I'll get a bandage from my drawer." I said and didn't let him stop me anymore. Those wounds needed to be treated immediately.

"Here, I'm only giving you a temporary aid but we'll call a doctor first thing in the morning later." I said as I wrapped the wound on hus chest with a clean cloth. I also gently wrapped his hands with a clean cloth so it wouldn't bled so much and wouldn't be infected.

"Does it still hurt?" I asked but he just shook his head.

"I'm fine now, so can we talk?" He said as he took and held my hand.

I don't think I'm ready to tell him those things. The second life. The remnants. The painful and tragic experiences I've had.

"I know you're strong and you might not even need me beside you to protect you but I... I would still want to stand beside you and fight with you. I don't want to regret anything ever again."

But if I'm not ready to tell you that now. When would I be ready?

Maybe I'm the coward and not him.

"I... I died once and this is my second life." He didn't seem to shocked about it. It seems like he already know and just wanted to confirm it with me.

"I don't have any recollections of my past or even how I died. So it's difficult to trust anyone and I started to build towers around myself. I skipped my childhood and instead focused on securing myself mentally, physically and financially."

He just stared at me as if he's just an audience watching a play unfold before his eyes.

I tried to wipe my tears off but he did that for me.

"I had no memories of my past life except the fact that I died but I don't how or when did I die. I didn't even know if someone killed me or it was just a natural cause. Then those remnants of the past Emily started to resurface in my head. It was as if we're just one person because I also felt and experience all those things."

I flinched at shivered when I remembered all those terrifying and miserable things the past Emily experienced.

"It... It was painful... Disgusting... Infuriating... And sad. I don't think I could maintain my sanity if I ever experienced that again... I might go crazy..."

He held my hand and hug me even tighter. He knew it too, he couldn't do anything if it's the remnants. It was impossible for him to interfere because it was only the past Emily could control that.

"That's why I build and prepared myself especially when that day... The first day I experienced that remnant..."

He glanced at me with a confused look as if he didn't understood what I was talking about.

"That day if I hadn't seen that remnant and if I didn't prepared myself, I wouldn't be here right now..."

Right. That was the very thing that separated my fate from the past Emily.

"What happened? The day you're talking about, was it when that Kingsley forced himself to you?"

He knew about that scandal. It wasn't shocking or what but I was still surprised because he kept in touch with the outside world despite being isolated in this place.

"Was he the one who inflicted that scar on your abdomen?" I fell silent with which he immediately understood.

"That day distinguished my fate from the past Emily's. If I've remained to be that weak and naive Emily, I would also have suffered what she had experienced. My family would've also died just like in the past and I would've also be buried in regret."

"Then I met you. At first, I didn't who you were because you didn't tell me your name. But when I found out that you were the Duke of Halsted, I planned to use you because I know that his hands wouldn't reach me here."

He'll be mad since I've exposed that I was just planning on using him in the first place and it wasn't an act of true love.

"Are you mad because you've learned that I was only using you to protect myself and my family."

"Why would I be? I could only be glad that you married me despite the fact that you wouldn't be able to step outside of this place ever again."

"You're one of a crazy man."

"I don't know about that, maybe because it's your fault--Ah!"

My eyes immediately widened when I realized that I hit his chest which has a fresh wound. Shit.

"Shit, I'm sorry. And please stop being so cheesy."

"Why? I'm only saying the truth." He defended and I can't help but glance at the wound on his chest.

"But." I immediately glanced at his face when he started speaking again.

"You did good-- no, it was an excellent job, Emily." He said while caressing my cheek.

What is he talking about?

"For enduring this much, those unimaginable sufferings you've gone through and for protecting yourself. You did an excellent job."

My vision started to became blurry again. No one has ever told me that. He's the first idiot to tell me that I did an excellent job. But why the hell are my tears flowing again?

"Now, you already have me. You must use me properly to protect yourself." My brows furrowed with what he said. Is he being sarcastic?

"You're not alone anymore so don't carry those burdens all alone. I could always handle those things, no matter how heavy they are, all you have to do is come to me and lean on me."

"Are you telling me to be overly dependent on you?"

"If only I could but I don't want to restrict you with anything. Continue doing what you've always did and just imagine me being an additional guard behind you." I can't help but burst out laughing.

How can a Duke be my guard. He really has no sense of humor at all.

"But still how could you believe those things I've told you, you might not know it but what if I'm just fooling you..."

His face became sad and serious as he avoided my glance.

"Since the day we've met again, I've begun to have recurring dreams of you happily talking with Duke Kingsley. Then those dreams would gradually fade away and would be replaced with you sitting alone in the corner of a dark room silently crying."

"What if those were just pure dreams?"

"That I'm not sure but it felt vivid like I was really there with you."

"But I know that I would believe everything that you would say and I won't even care if it's the truth or just lies. Because it's you."

That sounded like a toxic love, nevertheless I felt some sparks floating around my heart because of what he said.

"And if you don't trust me, I could understand it--"

"I trust you." How could I not trust my husband who even drove that dagger into his own chest just so I would not be hurt?

His eyes widened in shock. He must've not expected it.

"But don't break it. I don't give second chances even if it's you."

He just nodded and even raised his right hand as if he's pledging something at me.

"Then we shall seal it with something so that it would be notarized." He suggested which immediately made me nodded.

"Right, I'll go get a pen and paper." I said and attempted to stand up but he pulled my hand stopping me to stand up and get the paper and the pen. What the hell?

"We don't need that."

"What? Then how are we going to sign it? It should be written and not just done orally."

"Some things could easily be remembered if we do it in an unusual way and papers are bound to be destroyed anyway."

"So you're suggesting that?"

"This." With that being said, he moved his face closer to mine and gently cupped my face as he planted his lips onto mine.

Such a naughty husband, I see.

I wrapped both my arms on his neck and equally responded with the kiss his giving me. With our tongues knocking on each other's mouths, pleading to get inside, our lips did the rhythm.

"Then it's sealed." He said away pulled away from each other's kiss.

He gently planted a kiss on my forehead and hugged me.

That night, I slept soundly without remnants, fear and doubt. It was the best and the first time I've slept in peace.