This mystery

(Norman's POV)

For someone who adores myths and folklores, I never believed in soulmates.

I thought about this as I recalled my conversation with Rorim yesterday. Much to my discomfort, I felt the need to meet her to gain answers. Yet instead I have yet to keep them ashore, and now, I'm beyond clueless as to how to approach it. Not only am I drowning in confusion, I fear that I'm contradicting myself. And I'm not really comfortable with that.

Just like now.

"You're gonna be alright?" Gilbert asked, his head motioning to Rorim and Sam who was a foot away.

I nodded, convincing myself that I need not to open myself to opportunities that will bring me closer to her. She is more suspicious than she is captivating.

Don't just trust anyone.

"Then tell Imo I said hi when she wakes up." His hand tapped my arm and I tapped back.

"Bye Normaaan. Don't worry about us, we'll gladly enjoy without you!" Sam waved, a hint of spiteful triumph in her voice.

I can only smirk and walk away, relief brushing my shoulders as I go farther.

...…

"Here's your change, boy. Come again okay?" said the lady, coins on her palm as she handed them to me.

I only gave a smile and pocketed the coins. Holding the paper bag with fruits, I decided to walk my way towards the hospital. It was only walking distance anyway.

Before I entered the hospital, behind the glass door, my eyes caught a hint of a familiar face. Blinding brown hair that caught my eye. On his wrist looped the same braided bracelet I've seen nights ago. If I'm not mistaken, he was the one ogling Rorim's neck before I showed up. What's he doing here?

My eyes stayed on him, following and studying his every move. If this was the same man Rorim came with last weekend, I should— Wait a minute. Why am I following him? This is ridiculous. I look ridiculous. Turning around, I shook my head and paced towards the elevator.

"Mr. Song."

I turned and faced Dr. Singh, his polite smile aimed at me. I nodded in return and stepped closer. "How is my aunt's condition, Doc?"

"She's stable. We just need to increase the dose of her antibiotic. She needs to stay for the time being until her monitored condition is better."

"Has she woken up, Doc?"

"Not yet. She's still unconscious. We'll check on her as soon as she awakes."

Nodding, I said. "Thank you." I bowed slightly and took an apple from the paper bag, handing it to him. He smirked upon grabbing it, tapped my shoulder firmly and walked away.

I suddenly felt the need to use the bathroom. And right before I could open the door, it swung in fast, a body collided with me in a blink that tore the paper bag and fruits fell down to the floor. I can only look down, sighing as I silently release my irate at the sight of scattered balls on the ground.

Scowling, I watch the man immediately pick the fallen fruits from the floor, specifically three apples and two clementines. Upon recognition, in my mind I scoffed, utterly exasperated.

"I'm so sor— Hang on. You." Amusement was written on his face, his eyebrows slightly raised and his lips fighting to curl.

With my usual smile, I spoke. "Hello to you too. Do you mind slowing down next time?"

"You're the guy Rorim left from the cafe, yeah?" His hand pointing to me was still holding the fruits he made me drop.

"I—"

"One sec, I'll get you a new paper bag. Wait here." And he just left me there, the rest of the orange balls left in the ripped bag.

Breathe.

Entering the restroom, I placed the fruits on the clean counter, threw the bag to the bin and did my business quickly before that guy could return. I pondered as I washed my hands. Having seen that guy, I had come up with a few conclusions. One, he didn't look nor had a resembling feature like Rorim at all, hence definitely not a brother. Two, he had cotton taped in between his arm, meaning he had taken a medical test here. And three, he was my age. Question now is, what's his relationship with Rorim and why is he here?

knock knock knock knock

He opened the door and went in with a thin tote bag, fruits already inside. "Figured you'd be here." He gave it out to me and leaned on the wall from the other side of the room, his hands hiding behind him.

I slipped the remaining clementines inside when he spoke. "So what's Rorim like in school? You seem to be close with her. She's told me lots about you."

Pathetic. "Really now? Has she told you how much he hates me?" I can still picture how she said it last time.

He shook his head and smirked. "Not really. But if that's the case, they do say the more you hate the more you love. Shall we take this outside?" His hand held the knob and pulled open the door.

Perturbed, I headed on. "You seem to have a lot of time."

"I just received a text earlier that she'll have friends over. Thought you'd be there, I really wanted to meet you." He was already beside me and we walked down the hallway.

"I could've but unlike you, I have other stuff to do." I gave a curt smile and stopped mid-way, facing him. "Who are you and what do you want?"

Following me, he returned a smile too, his hands kept to his back. "Don't worry about me. I'm just a nobody who wants the very best for Rorim. Though, consider me on your side since I like you." He now brought his hand in front, an apple in it and took a bite. "You may go now, Sir Rorim's friend. It's very nice to meet you." With a bow, he went away, eating one unwashed apple.

Tilting my head, I took a second to register what just happened. Whoever he was, he was just as eccentric as his friend.

As soon as I got in the unit, I took out the fruits, one by one as I placed them in a basket. I was holding the fifth orange when I found a small notebook in between the other fruits. A plain, B6 sized slim notebook that looked like something I used to write notes in highschool. Not that I'm accusing, but only one person has accessed and arranged the fruits in the bag before I even got it. Whatever this is, this shouldn't have been here.

ding

'Sam said that your spirit is with us.'

Gilbert messaged and sent a picture of a pudding with three dots and a curve. At first I thought it was random until I realized the two dots were my eyes and the other one was my mole and it was smiling. Sam disliking me is one thing, and I have a hint why, but I just know it was different from Rorim's. If it was true that she's read my paper then she must have hated me more.

ding

Unknown Number

I checked. Don't tell me that guy earlier also knew my number?

'The bracelet isn't yours, thief.'

I thought deeper. Who is this accusing me of theft and how did they get my number? Bracelet? Rorim has it. Only she and I know. Unless.. Of course she just made up the story about it when I asked. But a thief? Is she capable of that? She seems to be a person who could afford expensive items so she couldn't possibly steal a cheap bracelet. Right?

You shouldn't even concern yourself about this, Norman.

I looked at Imo, her face still pale and unconscious when I thought about having a fruit. Deleting the text, I grabbed the orange snack in my hand and caught a glimpse of the plain notebook again. The longer I ogled, the more curious I felt. This ordinary pad of curiosity drew me closer, that for a moment I understood how Pandora could open a harmless looking box and bring nameless, tragic misfortunes to the world. As if for effects, I can hear my heart beat louder when my hand flipped open the cover. And I looked, eyes wide, breath held, anticipating. No curses and ill-fortunes. Just neat, well-spelled words written in fine penmanship.

to you who have lived a long life, may this remind you that it is only yet to be fulfilled

Quite a statement for a one-line starter, enough to make me more curious. I turned to another page and beheld more words, longer this time like an entry. No date along the corners. No 'dear diary'. Just direct to the point.

I inhaled and closed it as I contemplated. If I were to read this, I have to take it with a grain of salt. I am only a reader, not an inspector. And whatever secret I discover will be buried in my grave, just like everything else. Satisfied, I sat down, peeled my clementine and started reading.

I was Raven. No Surname, no second name. Just Raven. With a vivid memory of my birth, my mom's death and my father's jettison, I could have just kept their last names to myself. But I was abandoned and that meant I held no authority of owning their name. It was Ms. Hipher, our guardian in the shelter, who named me, maybe after my jet-black hair and obsidian eyes. From here on, I will only tell the names of those who are important to remember. The rest of the identities I'll mention, unless named, are less than insignificant.

As I was saying, after Ms. Hipher, there's Gale. She was one of the first people I trusted. She was the one who mostly raised me, despite being only thirteen. And while she didn't like kids, she tolerated me. Maybe because I was, unlike the rest of the kids, too quiet and disinterested in mostly everything. That was until N came. That's not his real name, of course. I name him N because, in retrospect, he was memorably insignificant. I can deny knowing him but he's a prominent being in my story that the least I could do was strip him less of his whole identity. N was like sunshine. As cheesy as it sounds, he really brought warmth and light to my dark, gloomy life. He was smart, funny, sweet, kind. He was good. He saved my eggs, Raven eggs I found on a tree, and we both promised to Ms. Hipher to hatch them together. Those days were fun, challenging and exciting. He was my first friend. First ever friend who asked me properly, who treated me like I was special. Because of him, I learned how to play chess, how to make flower wreaths, how to have fun, how to draw decently, how to do pinky promise and how to be brave. I learned a lot from him. A lot. We eventually hatched an egg (out of seven) one day. And we celebrated for a while, until Gale gave it away. Gale, who I first trusted and looked up to, betrayed me by giving away the rest of the eggs to the bird rescuers. Maybe that sounds absurd, they knew better than anyone. But it was my trust they broke and my family they denied me from. It took a while but I moved on eventually, with N's help and company. Little did I know that it was all N's idea. And I only discovered the truth when I read on my thirteenth birthday.

Did we ever get adopted? Yes we did. He was ten and I was almost eleven when we were adopted at the same time. Separately though. For five years he was my bestfriend and the only person I trusted. We grew up together, until we didn't. He got adopted by a warm, kind and happy couple, a perfect family for him. And I got the same as me - dark, selfish and lifeless Mr. and Mrs. Zhao. Before we parted, we promised to write letters and never lose connection. But I couldn't keep my part because this new family treated me less of a child, let alone a person. I was abused, denied my right to sanity. I had become a slave, an animal. I lived alone under their floor because I couldn't keep up to their standards. They wanted a trophy daughter and I couldn't live up to that. And since they couldn't return me, they punished me instead for becoming a burdensome disappointment. Like I said, I only knew of N's betrayal when I turned thirteen. I had read Gale's letter that she passed through N before she left when I turned eight. I hated her enough to not read it yet also not enough for me to throw it. Knowing the truth hurt me more than all the trauma and wounds they've inflicted. Gale said to understand N's concern, that he only meant the best, but I never understood. Maybe having lost my sanity and sense of self dragged me to that thought that if otherwise, it wouldn't have been a big deal and I could've been able to understand and forgive. But I was so tired of life that I simply didn't know what to think anymore. After knowing that, I only waited for death. And after two years, hell granted me peace. I didn't know exactly how I died. I just knew I lied there, on the cold, dirty floor, unkempt, unfed and unbothered until I passed.

That was the truth of my first life. And it was only the beginning.