A lunchtime poll, an argument, and social outcasts.

Heather Chandler glanced over to the group of seemingly nerdy dorks near them. They were all having their own conversation about God knows what, except for one, mid gulp of milk.

A loud gurgling noise made Veronica stare disgusted at the table. These kids were nice, but so self centered you could die and they would worry about their mental health.

"Did you see that! Heather number 1 just looked right at me!"

He said frantically to his 'friends' at the table.

There was milk all over his face and shirt, all his friends just giggled like little girls while adjusting their glasses to grin at heather Chandler nervously.

This was exactly what Veronica needed.

"Does it not bother you that everyone one this school thinks you're a social pirhana?"

Heather Chandler grabbed her arm while pulling her along once more. Her nails practically slicing into Veronica's arms. The tap tap of her plastic. Flats was more than Veronica could bear, but at least the argument seemed to be cooking down into a cold conversation.

"Like I give a shit, they all want me as either friend, or fuck."

She looked around before stopping abruptly to do one of her classic views of her kingdom.

"I'm worshiped at westerburg."

Smiling to herself like an evil hiena, she yanked Veronica's nearly dead arm once more.

"And I'm only a junior."

She said in mocked relish of Courtney.

Heather Chandler had been a bitch since the 6 th grade. Don't get me wrong, she wasn't nice in elementary school either. Back then there were only 2 heathers. Heather Duke was coaxed out of her shell sometime in junior high, made from a nerdy bookworm, to the hottest heather.

But still, this new transformation didn't stop heather from picking on Duke. In fact, more the reason too.

Accross the caf... Hidden in a corner.... A girl sat alone. Her chair sagged slightly, and she picked at her food slowly. Making sure no one was watching before she quickly ate a bite. Her hair was short and curly, her sweet round face was unsmiling. The years of sitting alone had made her learn to expect only the worst in man kind.

She had never been talked to nicely before, and, as she read the note on her lunch tray, hardly believing she wasn't dreaming, she cracked a sad smile. The writing was familiar. Surely she had seen it on one of her threatening notes thrown accross the classroom when the teachers back was turned to the hideousness of teenagers.

Then she saw the signature...

"Ram Sweeny"

She wanted to believe that someone loved her, but she couldn't let herself fail once more. She held it in her larg hands letting herself believe for a moment it should be true. Eyes watering in hope that one day she could be loved just like everyone else. If no one loved her now, then some day someone will.

As Martha dunnstock was drilling over the possibility, Veronica Sawyer was numbly standing beside heather chandlers charade. Asking all the different social types her stupid 'lunch time poll'

Before stopping at the geek table, heather Chandler shook her head in a bitchy fashion while stomping her flats extra hard to announce her presence.

(Not that it was needed, the dorks seemed to have realised and were straightening glasses nervously.)

"can't believe this. We're going to a party at Remington University tonight, and we're brushing up on our conversation skills with the scum of the school.

Veronica just walked dumbly beside heather. Her whole job of walking with heather was to keep keep her in check. And of course, she didn't want annoying heather McNamara, or stupid heather Duke. Veronica was a bitch as well, but at least heather Chandler seemed to like her as much as heather McNamara. She just showed it differently.

Veronica's face softened as they arrived at the table.

"Hi"

All the geeks said in a chourus at the same time-

"Hi"

Heather Chandler bitch boosted to 98%

"Ugh so this is what's called a lunchtime poll."

The 30 minutes of hell were a blur to Veronica, each part mushing with another

"I'd go to Egypt.... With a girl..."

Said a geek sheepishly.

Ram Sweeny had a different response...

"I'd pay Madonna to sit on my face and ride like the Kentucky Derby!"

He said stupidly with his mouth full.

Heather grimaced as she wrote something on her clipboard.

"That's got to be the spooky ass question I ever heard-"

All right this is important- tax at the begining"

"-maddonna should pay me though."

"Go to the zoo and get a lion- and then put a remote controlled bomb up it's butt-"

"-social security- legal fees-"

You push the button on the bomb- and you and the lion die like one."

"Whaaaaaat?"

Meanwhile...Martha has been reading the note - glancing at Kurt, reading some more, glancing... And now she knows it's all true; it's there in black and white - the hunkiest guy in the entire universe - well, Sherwood, Ohio - thinks that she's "sweet"... So, she goes over...

Heather Chandler and Veronica had made it back to the bitch table....

Heather McNamara jumped up along with heather Duke to get a better view.

"Oh my God it's happening!"

The Heathers (and Veronica) watch - Kurt looks up at Martha, reads the note, looks at Martha again, and then nearly falls off his chair... Ram laughs too. Martha flees... A veteran woundee - Martha doesn't need second hints; she's out the door as fast as her not-at-this-store size will permit...