Chapter 24

After breakfast the following day, Madara announced what'd happened last night before I could approach Gaara on my own with the news.

"So, what are your intentions now?"

Surprise hit my eyes as I realized the king asked me rather than the Uchiha man. Usually, that kind of thing would piss Madara off, but he seemed unbothered and looked at me expectantly.

Now that it's time to make a choice, I'm not entirely sure what we should do. So long as Nagato's alive, I'm a walking tracker. Amegakure knows where I am at all times. The same goes for Deidara, but he doesn't get to choose what happens to him. They will be in danger if I'm around.

"I need to leave before Amegakure attempts another attack. The sooner I find this "Jiraiya" person, the sooner I can go home."

Sasuke's voice was gruff and firm, "We."

I looked at him with a frown, "It's not safe to travel with anyone right now. I should go alone."

The prince and his uncle shared a look before the older of the two repeated the word "we."

The table was silent momentarily before Matsuri broke the tense aura, "Well, at least stay one more night so we can enjoy a celebration this evening as comrades. Will you please?" Everyone seemed in agreement when I looked around, so I sighed in defeat and nodded.

The soon-to-be queen pressed her hands together in front of her with a bright grin, "Wonderful! Lord Gaara, please excuse me so I can prepare." The redheaded king bowed his head slightly, the blank expression on his face softening ever so slightly.

Matsuri bowed in response before facing me, "Would you like to join me, Sakura?" I nodded with a slight blush, astounded by how diligently she's adjusted to being a royal. Everyone's wrapped around her little finger, the king and prince included.

She pulled my arm into hers once I was on my feet, and I glanced back at Sasuke as she led me away. A slew of aides followed us around the castle as Matsuri delegated tasks amidst conversing with me. After sending two pretty brunettes off to fetch a large order of Danbo Saki, the clear alcohol that Ino and I had taken such a liking to during our last visit.

"I will also send a shipment of it to Konoha. Consider it a congratulatory gift on your turning!"

I brought a hand up to my mouth and laughed softly, "I'll be sure to save a bottle for when you visit. We'll share it, okay?"

Warmth met her features, "That sounds lovely. Oh! I almost forgot to ask about your sister. How is she adjusting to motherhood? Lord Kankuro says she gave birth to a beautiful baby boy."

The smile on my lips widened as I thought about my adorable nephew. When we left Konoha, Ino and Sai were equally as delighted as they were apprehensive that Inojin's first tooth was beginning to come in. He's been such a well-behaved baby that it's almost scary, but he was starting to become fussy. Mikoto seemed almost smug watching her son deal with a teething child, as though she was happy to see him deal with what she went through so many years ago.

"She and her husband are pleased, and Inojin is healthy."

Matsuri's free hand raised to cup her cheek as a dreamy look met her eye, "I can't wait to have Lord Gaara's children. They'll surely be gorgeous and strong like him."

It's hard to picture Gaara anywhere near a child, much less an infant and even more so one that he sired. After seeing the drastic change in Sai, though, maybe I shouldn't make assumptions.

"Well, I wish you luck then. May you have as many children as you wish for."

As we strolled casually through the well-lit halls, my friend motioned for another aide to approach. After sending them off to retrieve a specific type of incense, she turned her attention back onto me, "What about you? Are you and Lord Sasuke planning on having children?"

The blood in my face tried to drain and rise simultaneously, leaving me dizzy. Matsuri noticed and giggled.

"I don't know. Sasuke hasn't even proposed."

Matsuri stopped in her tracks so she could pull my hands into hers and study them with wide eyes, "He hasn't asked for your hand yet? Do you think he ever will?" Matsuri's a lovely person, one of the most welcoming I've ever met, but her worldview is tiny since she's never left Suna, so she doesn't know that what she just asked me is a little rude and embarrassing.

Since I know she has no bad intentions, it didn't offend me, but it did leave me feeling a bit disheartened, "U-Um…I'm not sure, I guess."

Face warming, I let her intertwine the fingers of one of our hands, and we began walking again, "If I'm being honest, I thought he would've at least mentioned the idea of marriage by now, but he hasn't said a word."

It's the truth. Not once has Sasuke talked about our future in a long-term sense. All of those cue words: ring, marriage, fiance, propose, marry, haven't left his lips once since I met him. I'm an insecure woman. Everyone knows that, but I'm not so bad that I'd think he's leading me on. I know he loves me, and I'm sure he, at least for now, intends to remain by my side. The problem is that I don't want things to stay how they are forever, while he might be okay if they do.

When I think about it, he probably doesn't care about things like this, the titles and traditions of it all. Sasuke might be more than content to remain this way, where we're both openly together and in love but don't do anything official about it.

My mood began to fall as my mind wandered to the topic.

I want to marry him, though. I want to be his wife so badly that it hurts, but there's no way I'll ask him about it. If I did that, I'd appear even needier than I already am. He'll either be so uncomfortable that it puts a rift between us, or he'll propose to appease me, and I'll feel awful about it, which would, you guessed it, put a separation between us.

"If he does marry you, would you like to have children?"

I squeezed Matsuri's hand and gave her a shy glance, "You're asking the hard-hitting questions today."

She simply smiled and waited for my response.

I have considered what the future might hold for us, children included. Before meeting him, my answer would've been no because I wasn't sure if I'd ever be able to earn enough to feed myself, much less someone else. Now, I'm torn. I've never considered myself particularly nurturing or motherly. After seeing Ino with Inojin, though, I realized it doesn't matter what type of person you've been in the past. You won't know what it's like until you have your own child.

"I-I think if he said he wants them, I'd be happy."

It's hard not to think about Sinzo at times like this. It was all part of Kaguya and Hamura's power, forcing that illusion of motherhood upon me. They even put false memories in my head to support their attempt at mentally disabling me. Just picturing his adorable little smile, those bright and warm red eyes as he stared lovingly up at me-

"Are you alright? I'm very sorry if I asked something I shouldn't have."

I snapped out of my stupor and shot Matsuri a reassuring smile, blinking back tears that I wasn't aware had risen, "I'm okay, sorry. So, this party tonight, will it be for the entire city?"

"Initially, that was the plan, but now that there may be enemies around, no. Lord Kankuro invites a few trusted individuals as we speak, so it'll be a more intimate celebration."

Her mentioning of enemies brought back my earlier dilemma. Every moment I spend within this castle's walls, the more likely it is that these wonderful people will be put in danger because of me. Until Nagato dies, I shouldn't burden anyone with this: not even Sasuke and Madara. Just yesterday, they were almost killed because they were traveling with me. I need to get out of here without anyone noticing, or else they'll surely try to follow me.

The sooner I find Jiraiya, the sooner he can point me toward the angel he knows. Once I learn what I can from them, I can travel to Amegakure and kill the red-haired advisor. Then I'll return to Konoha to apologize profusely for running and explain the situation. Everyone's going to be pissed. Sasuke might not forgive me this time, not after leaving while he was away to go to Sonukuni. I'd rather him be alive and hating me than not living at all. The same goes for everyone else, too. It's not safe for anyone to be near me now.

This plan hinges on A. This Jiraiya person knows an angel and B. I can convince them to help me learn to control my new powers. Kakashi told us where Jiraiya lives. My new friend may help me.

"Matsuri, do you know where the village of Kakurega is located?"

The woman's cheery disposition fell, and she glanced around before lowering her voice, "Why would you want to know about a place like that?" I briefly explained what's been plaguing my mind, and she frowned once I was finished, "I don't like your plan. You'll be in a lot of danger."

"I know, but I'd rather it just be me in danger than this entire town, Matsuri. Please try and understand. I know it's selfish, but I'm asking for your help."

The sad expression on her face didn't falter, but she nodded after a long moment of silent thought, "I'll help you, but I won't lie to Lord Gaara or Lord Kankuro if they ask me about it."

I nodded, eager to have earned even an ounce of her empathy, "That's fine! Just please don't say anything unless they ask, okay?"

She nodded, sighing softly, "I'll procure a map of The Land of Wind and mark instructions on how to get to Kakurega, but promise me you'll be careful. That area is hazardous."

My brow furrowed, "How so?"

She glanced around again to double-check that no one was close enough to hear our conversation, "That village's nickname is "The City of Beasts" because criminals and monsters gather there."

Oh great.

Naturally, the place I need to go is notoriously scary. My luck wouldn't have it any other way.

So, I assisted Matsuri in preparing for the party throughout the day, and she arranged for someone to design a travel kit for me to take along when I slip out tonight amidst the excitement. She instructed whoever was helping her to hide it outside the castle and directed me where to find it.

Once the sun began to set in the sky, the festivities began. She said Kankuro was inviting a few trusted guests, but our definition of "a few" is very different because I expected maybe five to ten people, but over fifty arrived within an hour's time frame.

I was given a gorgeous gown to wear, and my hair and makeup were styled expertly by the same women who helped me the first time I came to Sunagakure. The dress was completely sheer and dark red with golden thread sewn into the lining. It was nearly floor length with slits cut up both sides up to my hips. Under it, I wore a white and gold two-piece set that barely looked like more than undergarments, but Matsuri refused to let me change no matter how big of a fit I threw.

My long hair was put into curls with my bangs braided back and pinned behind my ear so they wouldn't fall into my face. Dark and sultry makeup was placed on my eyes, all of it very much not my usual style, and beautiful gold jewelry was placed around my neck, wrists, and fingers with bright and colorful jewels set in them. Simple yet elegant gold sandals were placed on my feet. At least they didn't make me wear high heels.

"Stop it. You look magnificent." Matsuri pulled my hand away from the dress, offering a reassuring look as she fixed whatever I messed up before gesturing for the doorway, wordlessly telling me it was time for us to make our fashionably late arrival to the celebration.

In Suna, it's expected for the crucial women at any get-together to show up at their leisure, which is never on time. It left me feeling very rude, though, and I clasped my hands together behind my back to keep them from fidgeting with my clothes or hair lest my friend gets after me again.

She looked surprisingly regal in a dark green dress almost identical to mine. Still, she didn't bother wearing a two-piece under hers like me and only opted for the bottoms, so her chest was visible even in the dimmed evening lights. It was challenging to keep my eyes from wandering even though I'm not sexually interested in females.

A familiar scent met my nose, and I opened my mouth to ask her what it was, but we passed into the throne room then, and all the words left my brain. It's the same party we attended on a smaller scale than the last time we were here. Fast-paced drums kept the tempo for the small band of instruments I didn't recognize near the middle of the room, and a thick haze floated above us. That means the scent in the air is probably an aphrodisiac.

"Here, Sakura, drink with me!" A tall glass was placed in my hands before I could argue, and Matsuri gestured for me to follow her orders as she drank from her own. I did, feeling a bit apprehensive.

If Amegakure attacks now, we'll be in trouble. I don't want to get drunk. I haven't been drunk since turning, so I don't know if I'll lose control by accident. However, one drink couldn't kill me, so I didn't complain. Once the queen-to-be lowered her glass again, I followed her lead, my throat slightly burning in response to the familiar alcohol.

She leaned closer, cupping my cheek with her free hand, "Let's celebrate our friendship before you leave, and I'll pray to Sabaku no Kami for your safety!"

"I don't know who or what Sabaku no Kami is, but I appreciate the gesture!" I responded awkwardly over the loud music.

Matsuri only giggled and motioned for me to continue drinking with her. When I gave her a pout, she insisted, and I chugged the remaining half of my glass, raising the back of my hand to my lips when it was done.

The dish was taken from my grasp. Then Matsuri pulled me to an open spot in the crowded room and coerced me into dancing. As we twirled around one another, a small smile tugged at my lips at the happy grin sitting proudly on her face.

I forgot how fun it is to dance to this type of music. It's not all stiff and controlled like the balls I've attended. There aren't even set-in-stone steps to it. You just feel the rhythm and do what feels right, similar to sex. When the song ended and the next one began, I was sweaty and smiling from ear to ear with both hands grasped in hers as she mirrored my appearance.

Before either of us could begin dancing again, hands gripped my hips, and I was pulled back against someone's firm chest. I glanced around, expecting it to be Sasuke, only to be Madara instead. My face fell.

"This setting does suit you, indeed. I can see why everyone's so enamored with you in Sunagakure."

Matsuri's smile widened, and she winked as she released my hands, "Excuse me, you two, while I take my leave." Damn her and her inability to read the room!

Madara surprised me thoroughly by expertly guiding me to turn in his arms and move to the slower, more seductive beat. Since he wasn't causing too much trouble or pressing against me anymore, I continued with it.

"Where is Sasuke?"

His dark eyes rolled as he reached up to run his fingers down a strand of my curled hair, "He's around. If we stay here, he'll find us soon enough, so let me enjoy this and be quiet."

Irritation bubbled in the pit of my stomach at the overly casual way he touched my hair and spoke to me like this is something he does all the time. As I studied his face, allowing him to spin me slowly before returning to how we were again, my angry retort faded. My skin's not covered in goosebumps, and no terror is threatening to rise in my veins at his touch this time. No. These sensations just feel warm instead.

Disappointment in myself weighed down my lips. Just like how every time I'm intimate with Sasuke, our bond thickens and duplicates, every time Madara gets close to me like this, that fucking bond gets more robust. It's true, and I don't know how I know it.

Madara's dark eyes, which used to roam shamelessly over my body, continued to do so. However, unlike how I'm familiar, they danced up to meet my own much more often. For multiple minutes neither of us said anything and simply danced in silence, the slightly awkward aura fading quickly.

No matter how much I mentally objected, my body, my entire being, was eager to accept any affection he was willing to give and relished every touch of his fingers to my skin.

Slowly, the white of his eyes darkened, and the black of his irises melted into a burning hot red. My breath hitched, and I quickly averted my gaze to his chest. The last couple of times he could meet my eye with the vampiric trait active, he made me do things I was very uncomfortable with against my will.

"It's just the incense, Dear. Won't you please relax for once?" Madara's tone was more soft and reassuring than I'd heard it in the past, giving me the feeling this was his indirect way of saying he regretted his actions.

Even so, his words brought my anger back to the surface, and my eyes firmly snapped up to meet his again, "No, I will not. I can't trust you anymore."

Irritation weighed on his brow, "You're still upset that I'm your master?"

My teeth grit as I glanced around to ensure no one was eavesdropping on our conversation, "It wouldn't be so bad if I didn't know you have something awful planned."

The Uchiha royal seemed almost offended, "What makes you say that?"

"You've got to be kidding, Madara. There's always some selfish agenda behind everything you do. Don't lie to me. I know you well enough by now."

His jaw flexed as he glared at me before suddenly pulling me toward the exit. I rolled my eyes and tried to free my wrist, but I knew it was futile, so I didn't put much effort into it. Madara led me down multiple hallways until we could barely hear the drums beating anymore. Then he turned to face me, releasing me altogether, "I'm going to say this once, and I suggest you listen well because if we have this conversation one more time, I'll lose my patience."

My mouth fell open in surprise at his unfiltered ire, but he didn't allow me to interject, "It's more than some fleeting lust or childish obsession. I love you, Sakura."

All annoyance and anger fled my veins with impressive speed, leaving me to stare at him with genuine disbelief. He confessed to me before my first trip to Amegakure, when we searched for Orochimaru and Kabuto, but he never said the words. Truthfully, he didn't have to, either. Ino's told me time and time again that he's always thinking about his feelings for me when he's home.

"Hiding that I was feeding you my blood was a selfish mistake, I admit, and I won't lie and say it doesn't satisfy me to see you struggle to control yourself. Other than that, though, it's all been for you."

Tears welled in my eyes, and I cut in before he could continue with my voice a whispered hiss, "Madara, you can't keep doing this to me!" This time it was his expression that fell.

My hands moved around as I spoke, as though attempting to emote my passion for the subject more thoroughly, "One day, you're the good guy, and then the bad guy the next. You'll say you care about me and then hurt me immediately after. It's driving me crazy!"

A seemingly sincere aura of guilt met his features, and it made me feel slightly calmer because it meant he was actually listening to me for once.

"Please…If you're going to turn into a monster again tomorrow, just stop. All you're doing is confusing me. I don't know which one is the real you, and, at this point, I'm unsure if you do either."

Then I met his eye again, my hands falling slowly to my sides as we studied one another silently for many long moments. The heartbeat pulsing through me was quick and loud as I put effort into trying to remain calm.

Finally, Madara spoke. His hands came down to pull mine into them, and I gingerly allowed it with a thick look of distrust.

"I swear I'm trying. I just… My mind goes blank when you're involved."

I didn't know what to say. Hopefully, it's not just the bond forcing me to believe him, but I genuinely think he means what he said. Wild emotions swirled up to fill me to the point that it felt like they were pushing up into my throat, and I squeezed his hands in mine with a defeated sigh.

"Listen to me, Madara. I'm giving you one last chance, but I'm done if you make me regret it. I mean it. I know I've said it before, but I will hate you for the rest of my life. I don't care if I have to go as far as leaving Konoha not to have to see you."

I thought he'd be relieved, but instead, he seemed hurt, "Sakura…."

I shook my head and closed my eyes to hold back the rising tears, "No. I can't…After Sonukuni, I thought…." I took a deep breath, pulling my hands from his to wipe at my eyes and make sure my makeup didn't get smeared, "I thought you'd changed. I trusted you, and you betrayed me. That hurt more than I want to admit because I shouldn't care about you at all, not after the awful things you've done."

His mouth clamped shut, likely because he didn't expect me to be so earnest.

"Not only have you hurt me, but you've hurt Sasuke, too, and that makes me angrier than anything else. Do you know how heartbroken he was when he realized what you'd done, feeding me your blood behind all our backs? He thought the worst of me for a moment, even if he didn't mean to. I could see it on his face!"

I should stop. I should end this conversation now so I don't say too much and piss him off like I often do when I run my mouth like this. Damn it, all this anger and hurt has been building up since I found out he was my master, though!

"I know you don't care about him, but I do, and if we're going to make this thing between the three of us work, then you have to accept that because it's not going to change. I won't sit here and let you hurt him. I won't do it."

"I don't care if the largest part of your heart belongs to him anymore. I just want a piece of it, too!"

His red eyes darted to the side before I could react to his incredibly unexpected outburst, and I followed his gaze to see Sasuke was a bit down the hallway with his back to the wall and his line of sight on the ground.

A gasp sucked past my lips quickly, and I stepped toward him, "How long have you been standing there?"

The prince looked over at us, slowly rising to his full height with a guarded expression, "Long enough."

For some reason, guilt flooded me when I knew it shouldn't have. Nothing I said betrayed him. In fact, I stood up for him when I thought I was in his absence, so why does it feel so strenuous not to cry right now?

"Uncle, what are your true intentions?"

I didn't turn to look back at Madara because I knew what I'd see: a prideful look of warning to be careful in how he addresses him. That's how the older Uchiha man reacts when Sasuke speaks to him directly every single time.

"My goal is to protect Sakura, to be near her even if I must endure coming second to you."

That made me turn to give him a look of utter disbelief. Sure, he was being sincere with me moments ago because we both thought we were alone. I expected him to return to his cocky nature since Sasuke arrived, but I was wrong, and, for once, I'm happy to admit that.

My prince looked between us a few times before settling his gaze on mine, the guard on his emotions fading steadily. I took another step toward him, and he outreached a hand, wordlessly reassuring me that he wasn't upset and it was okay to come to him. I accepted a short kiss once we were close enough. When he pulled back, he studied my face in silence for a moment before I finally realized what he was telling me with his expression.

He's come to a decision I'm not completely comfortable with, but I promised to follow his lead this time, and I won't prove myself a liar by backing out. Sasuke understood that I was comprehending the situation when I gave him a hesitant nod.

Then he straightened his spine to lock a stern gaze onto his uncle, "Say you mean no harm, that you have no ill intentions. Swear to us, both of us."

I also turned to face Madara, giving the older Uchiha man a pleading look to meet us halfway so we could start figuring out how to make this all work, the bonds, and the complications.

His red eyes danced between us before he nodded, a look of defeat upon him, "If that's what it takes, then fine. I swear I'll behave." My eyes narrowed at his more casual way of making a vow, but I didn't expect him to agree at all, so at least he's on board.

I thought the three of us would immediately return to the party now that things had been at least sort of agreed upon, but instead, Sasuke spoke again. This time, his tone was nearly threatening, "And you will accept that Sakura is mine, not yours. Say it." I looked at the prince, but his glare glowed and set strictly ahead. When I followed his line of sight, I saw that Madara looked very angry.

Still, the surprises continued because he grumbled in a highly forced and uncomfortable voice, "Sakura is not mine. She's yours."

Sasuke spoke only after a short pause, his tone resolute and final, "Okay."