A forbidden feeling

I watched him as he slept. His peaceful face and an adorable mouth made me smile as I watched him.

Dyn is indeed so cute. It makes me ache to lock him up and hide him in a cage where no one else can see him.

"You are charming," I said as I gently caressed his face.

Since my adolescent years, I've known I'm not like the others.

When the princes speak of the princesses they admired, I will secretly glance at the servant boys.

However, I've not felt this kind of intense attraction to them before.

Meeting Dyn for the first time made me realize what it means to want a person. The feeling was instantaneous. I couldn't even control them at all.

All I wanted was to be next to him and shun other things.

However, I know the feelings will die for me.

Not only do I have a crush on a man who only regards me as a friend because of the reward he will get after this, but this type of relationship is shunned.

The kingdom is against it. And there's no way we can be together under the law.

Yet, I don't wish to be separated from him. I want to be as close to him as I can.

"Please, don't hate me," I said before I lowered my head, and for the first time in his life, my lips touched that of another man.

His lips were so soft, it made me ache to go have more taste of him.

"Gods!" I hastily removed my lips from Dynma's at the thoughts that went through my head.

As I watched him sleep, I felt guilty. "I do apologize for this, Dynma." I rose from the bed and walked to the window.

My heart was beating miles a minute as I thought back to the kiss of earlier. I knew I committed a crime I wasn't supposed to. But I just can't help it.

I'm a bastard like those men called me.

Dymna trusted me, but I betrayed that trust by kissing him when he was unconscious.

***********

I stretched my muscles as I yawned. My neck hurts from lying on the bench throughout the night.

"I thought I agreed to share the bed with you. Why did you decide to sleep on the bench?" Dyn frowned at me as he rose from the bed.

His shirt rode up a bit, and it exposed the creamy skin of his tummy.

What beautiful skin.

I thought as I unconsciously licked my lips. He looks so soft, it makes me want to lick—"Zoban!"

The shout startled me from my thoughts.

My cheeks grew red with shame, and I turned my face to the side.

"What's wrong with you? Why are you blushing so early in the morning?"

"Just mind your business!" I shouted, without turning to look at him.

"Odd."

He muttered under his breath before I heard him leave the room.

"Gods," I sighed.

Just what's wrong with me?

I've lived for seven years without feeling a thing for anyone, all for it to come crashing down the moment I saw Dyn for the first time.

What I wouldn't give to return to how I was before I met him.

I swear to the heavens, I will do—"They stated they will bring the pails of water later," Dyn said when he entered the room. "Let's pack before they make an appearance."

"Oh," I blinked at him.

The sight of him this morning made my mind turn mushy.

I just couldn't process anything as I gaped at his cute face.

"What's amiss with you today? You have been acting odd ever since you woke up. What's wrong? Do you want to chat about it?"

As if I will talk about my growing affection for you, with you.

I scoffed.

No way in hell will ever happen.

"Did you order food?" I asked as a way to get my mind from going down the lane it took at the sight of his cuteness.

"Why not?" He asked as he plopped down on the bed, causing his shirt to rise some more.

My cheeks turned blood-red as I turned my attention to the closed window to avoid looking at him.

Gods.

This man will be the death of me.

How can he act so nonchalant?

"What exactly is wrong with you, Zoban?"

"Nothing!"

I said with enough force. It made it sound suspicious.

"Now, you are acting suspicious."

"I'm not. I just had an awful dream."

"Oh, you had a bad dream? I had a pretty wonderful dream. Although it ended as fast as it started."

"Hmm. What did you dream about?" I turned to face him.

"Back in my world — I meant to say my kingdom. Back there, I have this girl that I admired so much."

"And?"

I tried to hide my jealousy and pain, but it was difficult for me to do so.

I felt excruciating pain when I heard he has a girl he likes.

"She kissed me in my dreams. Well, it's not a full kiss. It was more like a peck on the mouth, and that was that. " He sighed. "Her mouth was soft on mine, and her breathing on my—"

"I'm going out for a walk. You can pack the clothes. When I return, we will leave." I hastened to the door and exited while banging the door closed.

I didn't leave as intended.

Instead, I leaned on the door, as I tried to catch my breath.

The urge to match to his Kingdom and stab the girl that dared to make him look so dreamy was so strong.

However, I kept my feelings in check.

Even if I do that, it won't cause Dyn to see me as anything but a prince who forced him to escort him, with a bribe.

He will never love me as he loved the lady he spoke of.

Dyn only sees me as the prince, and nothing more.