CHAPTER 3

I looked outside the window. The school was pretty nice from the looks of it. "Uhmm, thanks for driving me here. I can take it from here."

"Crystal"

I turned my head so fast and glared at my mom. "Bomboclaat! Don't call me that. Mi nuh fuck with you right now." She knew I didn't like being called that but she loved to push me. I only spoke Patois when I was really mad. "Rahtid!!!"

She sighed and looked at me. There was so much intensity in her green eyes, I couldn't look away no matter how hard I tried. If I didn't despise my mom, I would have said she had the most beautiful eyes I'd ever seen. They looked like fresh mint leaves soaked in morning dew. It was so fucking beautiful and was the only thing she gave me I appreciate. Not my existence, not my allowance, just my eyes. At the moment, her green orbs held so much torment, I was trapped in them.

"Why won't you let go of the past? It's literally destroying you. All you see is the past, and your scars and your mistakes and it makes you hate your fucking self." She sniffed and a tear ran down her left eye. Lucky bastard! He was so lucky he could escape from her. Where was that exit sign when I needed it? "You hate yourself so much, you have to push it to others. Does hurting others relieve the hate? If you can't love yourself, then nobody is going to love you too."

Fuck apathy, I was angry. So furious and all I saw was red. I seethed through clenched teeth and leaned towards her with a scowl on my face. "Now listen here, Leona." My grandma was officially going to hang me when she heard of t. "I don't need your love, I don't need Sergio's love and I sure as hell don't need the love of the stupid kids here." I gestured towards the people thronging about outside the car. "But you're on point with one thing. I do hate myself. I hate the fact that my arms look like a spider colony. I hate the fact that I want to pass out every night cos of the fucking nightmares. I hate the fact that I ruined my life back home. I hate the fact that I'm still trying to fix it by coming to this dumb school. I hate the fact that I so happen to look just like you and all I have to do is look in the mirror and I would start to hate myself all over again". She winced at that one. "But you know what I hate the most? I hate the fact that you left me before I could learn to love myself." I was fucking exhausted after that. I just leaned back in the car seat and took deep breaths. I was surprised and oddly impressed by how calm I was after wielding the fucking storm. Ahead of me though, my mom was a fucking mess. She was heaving, sniffling, sobbing with bloodshot eyes. I almost felt pity for her. Almost.

"Everything I did, I did for you". She whispered.

"Then why am I broken now?" She closed her eyes at my candid and calm admission. "If it makes you feel any better, I probably hate myself as much as I hate you so you're not the only one down there." With that, I got off the car and went behind it. I rapped my knuckles thrice on the trunk and a second later, it popped open. Damn! There was a lot of shit in there. I exhaled a breath and started taking out the boxes one by one to the halls master's door. Why did I have to pack so much? After a long while, I was finally done off-loading my things at the master's door. I went to my mom's car and tapped the tinted window. It slid down and she was still bawling her damn eyes out. I grimaced slightly at the sight.

"I can take it from here. Thanks again for the ride. You might want to get home quickly to work on those cases." I ran out of words. "Uhmm, yeah. I think we done here?"

She nodded. "Can you do me a little favour though?"

I stared at her with a blank expression. "I highly doubt." But she asked anyway.

"Could you always pick up when I call?"

"I highly doubt again but I'll try."

She nodded again and I took that as my cue. Without a backward glance, I walked to the hall master's office. There was a pretty lady at the table in the office and She had honey blonde mane that went on for hours and hours. I was no expert but I decided the colour was natural. Or maybe it wasn't? You could never really know. While I was yet to confirm the authenticity of her hair colour, she looked up.

"Hello, my name is Lydia. Welcome to McKelley University. McKelley University has 58 years history of academic excellence. How may I be of help to you?" I frowned at the practiced speech, the practiced grin, the practiced posture. I restrained myself from rolling my eyes

"Is that all part of this job specification? Maybe you need a new job." I scoffed

She blinked. "What?"

I couldn't resist the urge to rolled my eyes right now. "I mean you're lucky you don't get to watch yourself say all those things and make a fool of yourself. No offence, but you looked hella stupid for a second." I shrugged and looked away.

She narrowed her eyes at me. Wow! I'd managed to make an enemy of the first person I met here. Way to go, gyalie. What was new? Then she burst out in laughter. And boy, she didn't laugh pretty at all. that was basically a guffaw. I rolled my eyes again.

"Woah." She wiped her eyes of a few tears. "I like you."

"Well, that's a first." I mumbled. "Who paid you to say that to me?"

"This just keeps getting better. I hate this job to be honest, it's really boring. But I think that's about to change with you on board. We've got to be best friends. I'm Lydia, what's yours?" She extended her dainty hand and grinned.

"CJ." I shook her hand.

"I was asking of your name." She genuinely looked confused.

I rolled my eyes yet again. At that rate, my eyeballs would be stuck to the back of my head at the end of the day. "Oh really? My bad. I thought you were asking about my favorite body part." She barked out another guffaw.

"Smart crack." I smirked at her response "That's your name though? CJ?"

"I think that's what I said the first time you asked, so I guess it is."

She smiled so wide it looked creepy. "I really love you right now."

I nodded slowly, eyeing her skeptically. "Nice but I don't swing that way. At all. Yes, you're very beautiful. Yes, I think you're a really nice lady. No, I'm not curious and no, I do not want to experiment." I cleared my throat.

She stared at me incredulously and shook her head. "Calm your tits. I don't swing that way too". She winked. "I could tell you about my sexual preferences if you'd like."

"Nah, I'll pass." I looked around. "How do I get a room?"

"Give me your application form, let me check for your room number." I handed it to her and she typed away. "Where are your parents or you're here alone?"

I looked outside to where I left my mom a few minutes ago and I was not surprised to see her jeep still parked in that spot. I turned back to Lydia. "Yea, I'm here alone. Any problems?"

"Nope, none at all. Most people come with their parents. That's all." She tried explaining. I nodded and kept quiet. I was not really up for conversations anymore.

"So, Chrystabel Jones?" She smirked. "That's how you got CJ? Very unoriginal, if you ask me."

I shrugged. "I didn't but you seem to get off to sticking your nose in other people's businesses." She gaped at me. "But I think you're a cool kid so I'll let that one slide."

"Rude." She pouted. "You're such an asshole."

"I'd been called worse."

She chuckled and shook her head. She was kinda chill but I didn't really see us being friends. Hell, I couldn't remember the last time I had a friend. "So you'll be staying at Amber Hall. Fourth floor,room 11." She squinted at the computer screen before her.

"Amber Hall? Where is that supposed to be?"

She pointed left. "It's not so far from here. It's like the premium dorm here at McKelley. Big rooming space, big beds and bigger assholes." At least mom got me a really good dorm. I considered thanking her and dismissed the thought immediately. Lydia gave me the once-over, eyes twinkling with mischief. "But you're the biggest asshole I've met in a while so I'd say you'll do just fine."

I'd got to give it to her. She was funny. I rolled my eyes in response and gave her a ghost of a smile.

"Woah, you almost smiled there. Don't tell me you're falling for my charms and going soft on me." She winked.

I smiled. Maybe we could be friends eventually. Maybe.

"How old are you?" She stared at me and I raised my brow in silent challenge.

"Bossy much?" She chuckled. "25." Wow, she was younger than I thought.

"Well CJ, I'll give you your keycard. Amber Hall is that way." She pointed left again. "There's a big poster in front of it. You can't miss …."

"Hey there, beautiful." A sexy drawl cut her off.