Chapter 39: What's the point of finding James?

Xue Ting sat by an empty piece of canvas back in May's gallery after that as she stare long at it recalling Qiu Wen's question at lunch. A nudge startled her.

"Looks like Mr. Charming didn't just bring me wealth but also stole my bestie's heart away…" May teased as Xue Ting chuckled.

"So how much did you make?" Xue Ting asked as she began to sketch a few strokes.

"Plenty. Three huge paintings and a couple of table-size ones. Bring your honey here more often! Sales are soooo good!" May announced as she danced around Xue Ting in her office.

"Someone just held a grudge on him didn't she? How come that someone had a change of heart so fast, I wonder?" Xue Ting laughed as she teased May. May chuckled watching Xue Ting continue to draw a new theme of the soft breeze from the park earlier.

"Sweetie, tell me honestly…" May suddenly turn solemn.

"Is he the father of the twins?" May lowered her gaze to meet Xue TIng's eyes.

"Is the latest art sold? Would you like new art? If yes, I am working on it. You're distracting. I am busy… Go, go get working…" Xue Ting again changed the topic as she just didn't want many people to know about it. Hence, she always kept it ambiguous as May chuckled knowing her answer roughly but knew Xue Ting must have her own reasons for hiding them.

"Someday I hope you get the happiness you deserve sweetie…" May said in her heart as she walked back into her gallery leaving Xue Ting to create a new piece in her office.

A few days later, Xue Ting had been constantly visiting Dan's bakery at The Grande building to teach Pam. Qiu Wen who had been visiting the headquarters since he started on the job for more insights on the business, would wait for her to head home together.

While in the lift heading down to meet with Xue Ting, Qiu Wen was reminded of James' birthday which was in a week's time. He was reminded it was also close to James' death anniversary a few days after when he caught sight of James' mother at the cafe opposite his office right when he tapped out at the exit.

"She must have returned for his anniversary preparations." He thought to himself sadly.

Xue Ting who was at the bakery with Pam at that time, also saw Mrs. Chen as she watched Qiu Wen watching Mrs. Chen with a somber look. She wondered what happened to the boys along the way when they drove home but still didn't have the guts to ask.

That night…

Qiu Wen was reminding himself to check with Xue Ting on his missing socks as he climbed the stairs to her room.

He knocked while she drown deep into her thoughts of James while standing by the window holding the calendar marked with a birthday note.

"It is his birthday in a week's time. Was that why Mrs. Chen was in town?" Xue Ting thought to herself.

She wondered if James had found out about their marriage and if he knew it was out of circumstances and about the twins on his birthday this year, wouldn't his birthday be horrible? She wondered after being married for so long, she had not seen him before or dared to get Qiu Wen to ask to meet James.

"Wouldn't James be curious or furious since it was in the news?" She questioned but scolded herself thereafter.

"Why the need to tell after 16 years? It's not like he will ever care about me again. I wouldn't even want to let his temper influence Qiu Qiu and Xin Xin." Tears welled up unexpectedly while she recalled their stupid mistakes of breaking up over trivial matters.

"I asked you where you went and you told me you were at the clothes shop! I went there and you weren't there. I asked you again! You are aware we are running late and yet you had to buy that shoes!" James yelled as they both argued by the roadside.

"I was waiting for you! And I just so happened to stop in front of the shop, so I went in and saw a good deal! What's that got to do with wasting time?! I was clearly waiting for you. It was at the same time!" Xue Ting yelled in return.

"You know how tight our budget is! Why do you need to waste money unnecessarily?! Is your life that dependent on your pair of shoes now?!" James was even more worked up as his family background wasn't well and to ensure he was able to date Xue Ting, he took up extra part-time jobs to cover their expenses but had set a limit to keep things manageable.

"Fine." Xue Ting gave up arguing as she grabbed her purse and took out a fifty-dollar note and chucked it at him. "Now am repaying for your so call payment for my shoes! Happy now?!"

"It cost fifty dollars?! Fifty dollars could survive us for a week!" James was furious and overwhelmed by his anger.

"You know what? I cannot go on like this. We are ending this!" James chucked back the fifty-dollar note in her face as he stormed off leaving Xue Ting stumbled to the ground, on the verge of giving up as she cried out loud by the street.

She was reminded of the same scene over and over for all the years but yet she couldn't help to feel disappointed every time. She wondered why was she so weak to not fight to save them there and then. Perhaps, the twins would have a better life.

A nudge startled her from her thoughts as she let her tears slip. Her gaze met with Qiu Wen as she quickly looked away.

"Ting Ting, you're alright? What happened?" Qiu Wen asked as she quickly wiped away her tears.

"Uh... Nothing. What can I do for you?" Xue Ting quickly changed the topic as she left the calendar back on the dressing table to accompany him out of her room. He then noticed the circled date on the calendar was James' birthday.

"I was wondering if you saw the socks I left on my bed this morning?" He asked trying to distract her as she led him back to his room.

"Sorry, I thought it was misplaced clothing you didn't need for the day. Here." She passed to him after she dug a little from his socks drawer.

She forced a smile before trying to step out of his room.

He held her arm to stop her. "Ting Ting... Are you sure you're alright?"

"I'm sorry. You just ... Caught me at the wrong time." She placed her arms on her hips while trying to force another smile but as she looked at Qiu Wen, she was reminded again about the reason she broke up with James.

She yearned to ask Qiu Wen about James many times but she told herself it was better to not know.

Qiu Wen knew something was wrong with her as he watched her fighting with her thoughts wanting to ask him something.

He was curious but didn't want to pry as he sat her down in his bed.

"It's alright. Go ahead. Tell me. Is it a bad customer today?" She managed to giggle and smile at his effort as she shook her head.

"Oh... Your staffs upset you?" He tried again.

She laughed. "No, no definite no."

"Must be the twins then. Which one is giving you such a tough time? Must be Joy…" She chuckled a little acknowledging that it's a known fact for Joy to be the mischievous one.

She sighed at his statement, looking sadder moments later as he held her in his arms.

"It's alright… Let it out. I will be here by your side to help you out." Qiu Wen comforted as she leaned onto his chest and heard the steady heartbeat which calmed her down a little.

"I see, so it's really Joy upsetting you? Look, I'm not an expert in parenting but..." Qiu Wen jokingly said to distract her.

"It's the twins' daddy." Xue Ting interrupted.

Qiu Wen couldn't register properly as he continued to explain. "Yes as I was saying the twins' daddy..." He finally realised what she said as she sat up straight.

"Aww... What about James? He didn't bother you, did he?" Qiu Wen was trying to pry but he knew it was impossible James would do that.

"It worries you?" Xue Ting asked as she looked sad.

"Erm... Not exactly but frankly, do you not want to meet him and tell him about the twins?" He asked out loud.

"I mean I get it, after so long... But you know, I guess he just has the right to know." Qiu Wen mumbled.

Xue Ting sighed as she looked down at the ground.

"I have asked myself this question a million times. Trust me especially when I was nearing the delivery date. May would have the whole story. That aside, I was very young 16 years ago. I regretted the decision to not reconcile as it was a trivial matter we fought when I bought the pair of shoes and wasted the money unnecessarily." She took a deep breath trying to stop her welling tears from pouring.

"What I fear isn't me falling back for him but how such an argument in the future would do harm to my twins with the same consequences. Having the twins was a lifetime commitment." She sighed.

"Besides, the breakup confirmed my feelings for you. Otherwise, I wouldn't have went to find you that night before I left…" Xue Ting pondered to herself as she gazed into his eyes.

Qiu Wen was contemplating to whether tell her the truth.