The scent of someone new

Something was definitely wrong with Fenris today. I admit that he had times when I ended up doubting his cognitive and rational thinking but those moments were minimal…very minimal. My wolf was poles apart from the rest but he was special in a good and fantastic way.

But really…what the heck had gotten into him today?

'Breux, why are you storing food in the pit?'

Someone tell me why that fresh kill wasn't in our stomach yet. Fenris ignored my query and plowed the dug up soil back to the pit where it was taken, burying the stag in the process. That stag should be in the pit of our belly for digestion and not in the pit of soil for decomposition.

I pray to the Goddess that Ulmer would get an allergic reaction to his own fur and possibly die from the lack of air. If he caught the scent of this stag, Fenris and I would go on another few days of eating weeds.

My wolf sprinted out through the dead forest. I was left in great wonders on why he was suddenly ignoring me. Did I say something wrong? Fenris never disregarded me for anything I would say. If I did say something that I think would offend him, I would apologize without delay. After all, it was him and me against the world now.

'Talk to me, breux, remember that there shouldn't be any secrets between us right?'

Yes, it was just the two of us. We lost our mate at the same time we lost our pack. It was so sudden yet the pain was excruciating. The sense of doom was there. It was an abrupt crack to a mirror of hope that quickly shattered into irreversible pieces.

That day I thought it was all over for us. It was painful but we were ready to accept death as it was because we had lost everything. I sounded pathetic. I truly wished that we weren't here now. It didn't matter if there was no funeral or if our bodies would be openly decomposing for a passerby to see. Dying was a hundred times better than living a life emptied of purpose. There was no point in seeing another sunrise. Because every time we breathe, it just reminds us of how alone we really were.

'Breux?' I called out in my last attempt to catch Fenris' attention.

'He's here droog! I can smell him!' my wolf excitedly yelled as he ran around in circles.

'Huh? Who's here?'

The only person I knew who was with us in this decayed and hopeless forest was Ulmer. I doubt Fenris would ever feel excited about that stronzo no matter how good-natured my wolf was.

Fenris abruptly stopped his circling. He leaped up like an excited pup and howled 'MAAATE!' shamelessly.

"Fenris, what the heck is happening to you?"

No, he couldn't be talking about our mate. Our mate died years ago.

Wait...could it be?

"Fenris, you're excited about Conall's mate. He isn't our mate."

This was really unexpected. Who knew we would run into him in this place? Don't tell me he was a werewolf hunter.

Still, I knew the longing Fenris had. It wasn't right to settle for our deceased brother's mate just because noona used him as a replacement to save our life.

This just didn't sit right with me.

Fenris continuously disregarded my warnings and dashed away. The closer we got there the more restless my wolf became. I was very worried about the future. I didn't want to be involved with Conall's mate in a romantic sense. My conscience won't make me sleep.

We reached the biggest tree in the forest, catching our cousin Ulmer harassing a very charming blonde. Conall's mate was indifferent to Ulmer's advances. We weren't going to sit back and watch someone become a victim by Ulmer's assaultive dicklet yet again.

Fenris jumped out with a low grumble of rage that vibrated through his throat. Ulmer glanced at us with a nervous smile.

"Fenris...I was about to meet up with you. I found entertainment. We can share."

Satisfying his hairy canary was all he could think about while getting tracked down by blood-thirsty pale leeches.

'Entertainment?' We spoke through the pack link. 'The only thing we'll find entertaining is tearing you to shreds.'

I had wanted to get back to Ulmer for every crap he laid on us. The purposeless life drained me from any willpower of actually biting his face off. He escaped though, whimpering for his life.

"Fenris is it?" Conall's mate asked. The tone of his voice was monotonous but Fenris acted like he just heard a God speak to him.

"Woah…Woah droog! He looks really handsome!" Fenris swooned.

I released a sigh. "He isn't our mate, remember?"

Our real mate is gone now. This one…wasn't ours and I knew very well that Fenris understood that.

"I know droog but…Conall is gone now and won't Conall be happy if we protect his pretty mate for him?" Fenris asked with a hopeful tone in his voice.

Fenris…

Conall's orb of bond was in our chest. With him gone, his mate would be drawn to us because we had our brother's orb.

We owed our life to Conall. It was only reasonable that we repay him by protecting his mate.

"Okay, you're right. Conall is gone now. Because he sacrificed his core for us, we have the responsibility to protect this guy."

Besides, he didn't seem to be such a troublesome person. He looked…dull to me. Maybe his life was uneventful or just plain old boring? Who would even venture in a dead forest other than two jackass wolves hoping to find food and shelter?

The blonde freed one of his hands from his glove, offering his palm to us. Fenris and he had a mutual understanding of things at the first meeting.

I was dying from edginess.

I was afraid that he would reject my wolf and look at us funnily, but he didn't do either of those. It didn't show on his face. I think he really was trying to comprehend my wolf and his actions.

Once his hand and my wolf's paw touched, a tidal wave of warmth washed over us. It was as if all the colors of the world returned. He unexpectedly looked like he was glowing even more so than before.

He really was…pretty.

With the losses that had transpired in our life because of our weakness, I thought we would never find beauty again.I wanted to be forgiven for possessing something that completed the integrity of being a werewolf. This orb and this life shouldn't be with us.

I'm sorry if we couldn't protect you…

I'm sorry that we had to leave you…

I'm sorry for having this orb in my chest when it should have died along with your heart…

Conall, let me borrow your bond for a while.

I know it's selfish, but I'll have it in my chest for now.

I want to repay you for saving me.

And the only way I can do that is if I cared for him in a way that you would if you are still here.

Conall…are you watching?

Please continue watching over us with the Goddess along with everyone else.

This life that you gave us, I'll use it to serve the person that you could have fallen in love with.

I promise I won't fall in love with him. He belongs to you.

…

…

…

I thought we would be protecting someone who had no worries in life.

Boy, I was so wrong.

Tell me how can such a dry man like Lucian wound up in such knotty and problematic situations?

It felt like we were having a tug of war with the world. I didn't want him out of my sight because either he would get snatched away by someone or he would wander off by himself.

Most days I spent with him, I would point out what Conall would love about him and what my little brother would nag about. He hated recklessness and Lucian actually had a sign of that word on his forehead. Lucian had this warmth that wouldn't be obvious to people he didn't care about. But he was a genuine person.

Conall and Lucian would definitely get into heated arguments with the latter always ending up winning. My brother would treat him grumpily but would secretly like taking care of him. I know that with the slightest attention given to him by the blonde, my brother would redden up like a tomato.

Despite their constant arguments, Lucian had so many characteristics that would make him adore him. My brother would dote on his sweet fruity scent and the way he would show his greatest concerns in the most subtle ways.

Conall loved the color blue. There was no doubt that he'd get lost in those eyes. Those eyes concealed emotions, yet when they glimmered, you know you were looking at the imitation of the ocean that sparkled with the sun's honesty.

If there was one more thing that he would love about Lucian, that would be his growing determination to put someone else before him.

It was something…something that Conall required from my own mate.

'That person should love you unconditionally and should be someone who can see right through your false act of bravery. He should be someone who would stick his neck out for you and just did not care about status, repute, and power.'

"I shall keep you safe with all my power," was what Lucian said when we were facing XII.

My heart awakened.

I was just flustered with him at first. I forced myself to believe that it was nothing too deep. The further I tried to save the boat from sinking, the further I sunk to the deepest depths of the ocean.

I didn't keep my promise to Conall.

'Everything that you would like about him, I ended up liking too.'

I could feel what you could have felt if you were still alive.

'I'm sorry for loving him.'

"Why aren't you beside Lucian? He was really worried about you, you know?" Lucius asked me.

"That's right droog! Hec, that hairy urchin almost got us but we were stronger than him! We boomed him away droog but Lucian was really worried. Fenris feels bad if Fenris isn't with him sleeping," my wolf protested.

"I'm sorry breux, give me a moment okay?" I requested.

Fenris fell silent for a second before whining in concern.

"Are you alright, droog? What is it?"

I was standing outside of Lucian's room after the blonde had fallen asleep.

"Can I be honest with you?" I asked Lucius.

He crossed his arms in front of his chest, leaning back against the wall across us.

"I'm listening."

I took a deep and heavy breath to muster up the courage to make eye contact with him.

"I'm not Lucian's original mate," I confessed. "Someone, no, my brother sacrificed himself to save me from the death of having my own mate kill himself. Lucian shouldn't be with me."

Lucius was intently listening. His facial expression remained indifferent.

"If there's one thing I would want to teach my brother about this world, that would be not settling for a bond that's blessed to you right off the bat," Lucius responded. "You create relationships that work for you. If you find it and it brings you happiness, hold on to it."

He placed his hand on my shoulder.

"You say that your brother was originally my brother's mate. He used his bond to save you from your own heartbreak. That says a lot already. He trusted you to be there for Lucian because he won't be able to. If you feel guilty for loving my brother, then you aren't putting importance on what your brother had sacrificed. You're here and he's not and that isn't because you forcefully took that bond away from him. Use the privilege he gave you and don't waste it on something that your brother won't even bat an eyelash on," he advised.

"Lucius…" His words were encouraging. He always knew what people needed to hear. I guess that would be because he was from the royal family. He needed to be good at this stuff.

"If I was your brother…I would thank you for each heartbeat that pounds for a person I can no longer protect." He patted my shoulder, walking away to give me some time.

"Fenris is sorry for being selfish, droog. Up until now, Fenris is only thinking of himself and how happy Fenris is whenever he is with Lucian. Fenris didn't know that it made you sad. Fenris isn't a good boy. Fenris is bad…" my wolf whimpered.

"No breux, it's my fault. I'm sorry…I'm sorry…"

I knew that my pack's passing and my mate committing suicide were not my fault. A huge part of me decided to create this burden of guilt because I couldn't let go of the past. I clung to those memories and created scenarios of what if's to cope, but it only made me sink further.

I miss them. I wish I could talk to them and tell them how much I love them. I wanted to be given more time to cuddle with my brothers. I wanted to make papa proud of me. He still had so many things to teach me. I couldn't even welcome the child from my mother's womb.

I didn't notice that I was tearing up until I started sobbing. I cried silently in the quiet hallway. The door squeaked open. My blurry vision caught Lucian coming out of the room and squatting before me. He stayed there with me, uttering no word until I finally calmed down.

"I'm sorry…did I wake you?" I asked him.

Lucian blinked sleepily before swaying his head. He brushed some of my tears with the side of his index finger.

"Just now…I heard the voice of the boy that had talked in my head nonstop a few years back," he told me. "I never paid heed to him before and he babbled nonsense. I felt nothing for him whatsoever even when he suddenly stopped talking one day."

My eyes widened when Lucian's eyes cast down and his lips pursed.

"But now remembering him…I regretted not speaking to him. He seemed to be a good person."

Did Conall submerge and make contact with Lucian without our knowledge?

"What did he say to you?"

Lucian's eyes raised. He tilted his head to the side.

"I'll leave you to him…that's what he said to me," Lucian responded, blankly looking up. "Where did he go I wonder?"

I pulled Lucian into my arms. I was sniffling and hiccuping, an unmanly wreck in his presence. Lucian returned my embrace as I shut my eyes tightly.

With your approval Conall, I will care and love for him as you would for him.

This person's scent, I shall cherish it.

"Why do you cry, Caleb?" Lucian queried, stroking my back. "Do not worry, I am here. I will keep you safe."

'...If your mate is like that then...we wouldn't have to worry about you all the time.'

I found him Conall.

You can rest now.

Thank you.