Do I still love him?

Sana's POV

It was just any other hectic day for me. Reading files then signing them and typing the whole day and sometimes you have to go on sorties. Sitting the whole time infront of the computer screen is really hectic. Well now I can rest for sometime until Maya comes.

Maya is my roommate and also a fellow officer. Once she starts blabbering even god can't stop her so before she comes I will take a quick nap.

*Knock knock*

Shit now I can only dream about sleeping but can't sleep for real.

"Why you came so early?" I asked her as soon as I opened the door.

"Darling you were missing me right." She said in her ever so energetic voice.

"Whatever.... Anyways how was your day?" I asked her.

"Tiring.. but not anymore because the moment I saw your face my mood was again lit up." She said teasing me.

"Babe am not Rohit that you are flirting with. So keep your flirting skills in store for him." I said and winked at her.

"Sana.. umm can I have a coffee please." She said.

"You don't have to say please darling. You go freshen up and am making your coffee." I said and went to the mini kitchen we have in our room.

After a tiring day everyone needs a coffee and we two are no exception. Well after good 15 minutes I am done with my coffee. My frothy cold coffee. Thank God this mini kitchen has space for a mini fridge else my cold coffee would have been of no use. Actually whenever I say people that we drink cold coffee in the cold weather of Srinagar, they look at us as if we are some aliens.Whatever leave the folks and let's focus on the coffee.

"Yummm..." Maya said elongating the word. "Sana how come you make this frothy coffee yaar ?" She asked

"Top secret my girl." I said while sipping my coffee.

"It tastes the best today." She said.

"Thank you but you say the same thing everytime." I said.

"Yeah.. everytime you make a little better than the the last time. What can I do?" She said making a pout.

"What happened?" I asked seeing a slight dullness in her behaviour.

"Babe how come you can read my mind, am I that open book?" She asked completely amused.

"Ofcourse.. now don't beat around the bush and tell me what happened." I said.

"Got some good scolding from Abhay Sir." She spoke in a low voice.

"Why?" I asked because Abhay Sir never scolds anyone if the matter is not that serious. And moreover Abhay Sir is like a brother to me and he also treats me like his own sister after the office hours. During office hours we are just senior and junior.

"Tomorrow is the conference and I had still not submitted the file so now i have to work on it else he would literally kill me." She said taking out her laptop.

"Bro wasn't this assignment given to you almost 10 days back?" I asked

"Umm...yeah but you know how lazy I am so it just skipped my mind." She said

"Say something new darling." I said because I already guessed that this would happen.

"Shut up bitch and let me do my work." She said in an annoying tone.

"Tell me if you need any help." I said

"You are the sweetest. But at the moment I don't need any help but when I will need you have to help me." She said in her not so scary tone.

"Aye aye captain." I said and we both laughed. She continued her work and I was reading some pending files.

*************

After 2 hours

"Bro am hungry." I said in a childish tone.

"Same.. let's eat something in the mess." She said.

"Why don't we cook something?" I suggested.

"Babe I think you can see am working." She said raising her one eye brow

"Babe who said you will cook.. I will cook and that too your favourite chicken biryani." I said with full energy.

"Aww you're so sweet." She said making a cute face

"Haha nice try but I ain't melting this time.. you carry on with your work else Abhay Sir will make you a chicken biryani." I said and went to the kitchen.

I was busy in my preparations when I heard a knock at the door. Who is there at this time. I went to open the door and saw that Veer was standing at the door. I welcomed him inside and asked him to take a seat in the small sofa which Maya and I fitted in this room after much difficulty. I went to bring water for him.

"Here take it." I handed him the glass of water. He took it and drank it then started to speak.

"Umm actually... Am getting married." He said out of the blue.

"What?" Maya and I both shouted.

"Yeah.. it's after 20 days and you both have to come and I ain't hearing a no from you two." He said and I felt a pang on my heart.

"Sure bro we will come. Sana had already applied for leave. I still have to apply." Maya said in one go.

"Really Sana... Umm so when are you going." He asked me.

"This Sunday." I said.

"Same.. me too." He said in excitement. But my excitement is dead.

"I guess we both have to travel together." I said in not so joyous tone.

"Well my flight is at 5:00 pm. What about yours?" He asked me.

"Same." I said.

"Great then I got someone to talk with." He said with same energy.

"Yeah... Umm well would you wait for sometime am cooking chicken biryani." I asked.

"Sure." He said and I went to kitchen or you can say I ran away.

I felt like the earth is swallowing me. Why.. why it happens everytime with me. I don't understand. What is it with him that I feel like my world stops everytime.

Do I still love him?

This question still haunts me everytime he talks to me. Why? I will go mad if I think about it. I think I seriously need to move on, because there is nothing left I can do to make him mine. Also it's not correct to still have feelings for him even after his marriage. No this is wrong. I have to forget him. I have to forget that I ever fell in love with him. I have to I don't have an option.

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