4. We return home

CAMERON'S POV

It had been a month since the accident, and I'm beyond tired of being here. I knew I had to be there to improve, but seeing the news about my accident and what Lara would do now that my career is over is making me more than fed up. I wanted to go back to our house and rest.

I also know Lara wants more than anything to get back in the car to test it out. We agreed I was retiring and she would be the one to test the car until she became pregnant, and when she was, she would help her team on the wall, so it was very likely we would continue going to the races.

"Time for your physio, honey," Lara said, entering through the door with the wheelchair. It's not what I wanted most in the world, but if there was one thing I had to do, it was to improve so we could get back to our life, or at least as close to it as before.

"I know it's not what you want right now, but it's the best for you," she said, reading my mind and I nodded. Lara helped me sit in the chair and together, we headed to the physical therapy room. Along the way, Lara was telling me things, but I wasn't paying attention at all to whatever it was, the news kept running through my mind about what Lara's career would be like now.

"Will you tell me what has you so upset?" Lara asked behind me and I shook my head to clear it. "There's nothing that upsets me, really," I assured her and heard her snort. "That's not what it looks like."

During the physio, both Lara and the physio helped me, but I really didn't feel like doing anything, I just wanted to lock myself away and think of a way to them not saying those things about Lara, I would never allow her dream to end like that and if it was necessary, I would leave her so she wouldn't abandon her dream.

After an hour, we returned to the room, I could tell Lara is quiet and angry about something, I don't know what, but I'm also afraid to ask, I knew what her anger is like and I didn't want to screw up any more than I had done.

"You're seriously not going to tell me what's bothering you, Cameron?" Lara asked behind me, and now I knew she's angry with me, she never called me Cameron, unless she's upset or angry. "There's nothing wrong with me, seriously," I tried to make sure, but if one thing is more than clear, it's that it wouldn't be easy to convince her everything is fine, she knew me better than anyone, or at least I'm one of the people she knew best.

"When you decide to tell me what the hell is bothering you, call me." I don't know what she's referring to at this moment, all I know is I'm angrier than I would like. When I got to the room, she helped me get into bed and then left, which left me confused, and even more so when I see the look on Eli's face when she entered the room.

"Do you want to tell me what you've done to make Lara leave here angry?" she asked, crossing her arms. "I didn't do anything," I assured, because, technically, I hadn't done anything. "Of course, and Lara gets angry for nothing. Are you going to tell me what's bothering you so much that you don't even want to talk about it with your wife?" She asked and I'm somewhat surprised she knew there is something bothering me.

"Did Lara tell you something?" I asked, trying to figure out what she knew. "I don't need Lara to tell me something when I can see it with my own eyes. And I'm not saying because Lara told me, but because I can see it from you. I can see there's something strange and it's bothering you" she insisted and I denied, because it wasn't something she needed to know, and even less something I should bother her with, so I denied "Cam, I know something is bothering you…" She started, but at that moment the door opened showing a smiling Lara. "Honey, I have good news for you," she said and I put aside everything I have in my mind to focus only on my wife. "What?" I asked with all the enthusiasm I could show now "The doctor said we can go home" she responded happily to which I smiled "Great" I said.

From the corner of my eye, I could see how Eli was denying, I guess it was because she knew nothing is okay with me, but at this moment I don't care. I don't want her to worry about the news and I don't want Lara to focus on it.

A couple of hours later, we were leaving the hospital with instructions on what to do if I felt too much pain and when I could start rehabilitation. I could see how happy Lara is, which I don't know how to take, because normally she wouldn't be so happy after an accident, she never was because in a way it reminded her of what had happened to her when she was little.

When we left the hospital, many reporters were there waiting, I guess to get an exclusive or write something that wasn't entirely true. Once inside the car, I sighed with relief and Lara ended up taking my hand and giving it a squeeze. "They'll get over it, don't worry," she whispered in my ear, and then gave me a small kiss that made me relax a little more, and after a while in the car, I fell asleep.

LARA'S POV

I don't know what's happening with Cameron, because for a few days I had noticed he's upset, and I knew I'm not the only person who thinks Cam is upset, because Eli thought something is wrong him, in fact, she asked him and said nothing upsets him, which made it more than clear to both of us something is bothering my husband.

Shortly after we got into the car, Cam fell asleep, so I looked out the window without moving too much and stroking the back of his hand to keep him calm. "Hasn't he told you what's wrong with him yet?" Eli asked, on the other side of Cameron. "Come on Eli, you know if I ask him, he won't tell me what's wrong" I said, sighing at the end. "We don't lose anything by trying."

I nodded, because I knew she's right, I had nothing to lose by trying. "I will, but first I want him to calm down and get used to being home again for a few days." Eli nodded, and we were silent again for the rest of the way to the airport.

Once we got there, I gently woke Cam up so as not to scare him and help him out of the car and onto the plane. When we got on it, Cam was smiling and we both went to the back of the plane, where we would have more privacy since the rest of our family would be in front.

"It's been a while since the two of us were so alone," Cam said with the smile still on his face. "I know, but now we'll have all the time in the world to be," I answered honestly, but now I'd have to think about whether to extend my break from F1 another year or two. "Honey, are you ok?" my husband asked, causing me to focus my attention on him again. "Yes, why do you ask?" I questioned, a little confused. "You seemed very deep in your mind and didn't listen to what I told you," He responded.

"Sorry, I was just thinking about something" I said as sincerely as I could "I want to talk about something important" he said after a few seconds of silence "Sure, what is it about?" I asked curiously "I don't want you to leave the competition" he responded and I froze in place "We'll talk about that in a few months" I said and he denied "No Lara, I don't want you to leave the competition because of what happened to me or to take care of myself" he said the last bit more intensely "I wasn't going to do it Cam. The only thing I thought about was postponing for a year, maybe coming back for two," I said sincerely and he denied it again.

"You don't need to postpone anything, Lara" he protested and this time it was my turn to deny "Cam, honey, you know I love you, but I don't think we can have a child right now. You have to fully recover first. I promise you I'm not going to leave the competition, but I want to have a child with you, and you heard what the doctor said, it will take you a while to fully recover and if there's one thing I don't want, it's to hurt you," I said seriously.

"We can start later, but you don't have to postpone anything just because of the way I am now," he said and I thought for a couple of seconds, because I'm not understanding why he insisted I should compete again and wait to know how much time to have a child. "Are you going to tell me what's bothering you?" I asked, trying to understand. "There's nothing," he answered calmly.

"There's something wrong with you and I know it Cam. I'm not saying tell me right now. I only ask that whatever is bothering you, let it out" I asked, because better than anyone I knew what it is like to keep things inside. It didn't usually end well, or at least for everyone. "Nothing is wrong with me, but I swear the moment something happens to me, I'll tell you first," he assured and even though I know at this moment he's not telling me the truth, at least in what he has to say. Seeing that nothing is wrong with him, I'm going to let him be for a few days and see if he got better.

Cameron ended up taking my hand, intertwining our fingers and kissing my ring, which made a smile appear on my face, because at least I knew not everything is bad and my husband is alive and with me, that's what most important to me right now and something I will cherish for the rest of my life.