Worried

After leaving Rev in the medical ward, Lyra and I finished our last class. We decided to talk once we got home, but it was the most awkward 2 hours of my life. My head raced with all the possible outcomes and most of them led to Lyra deciding to leave. 

I didn't want to lie about anything to her anymore, but I didn't know if I could bring myself to tell her everything. Do I mention I was a guy before? Will she hate me for taking advantage of the knowledge I've gained? 

There wasn't much I could do other than pray for the best outcome if there was one. 

*

My mother wasn't home as she was out shopping for groceries, giving Lyra and me complete privacy. I sat on the edge of the bed while Lyra sat across from me in a chair with her arms crossed. The silence was deafening as Lyra waited for me to say something. 

'Just say it, there is no running away.' I felt my body was in fight or flight mode and it was trying to find any possible way to get away. 

"As you may have already figured out... I am indeed from another world or, as I see it, another timeline. I only took over this body a few days ago after eating something I probably shouldn't have." I was hesitant to mention the apple because it seemed to have a strong connection to this timeline's world tree. 

The fewer people that know I have it, the less chance I have of being found out by the magic association.

"Only a few days?" Lyra looked shocked at how long I had been, but I figured if Lyra knew about my old world, she had also been transported here at the same time. 

"Yeah? I suddenly woke up in this world without a clue where or what was going on." I was afraid of what Lyra had to say, but so far it didn't seem bad.

"I've been here for years, it was like those isekai anime where you're an adult in a kid's head and have to grow up all over again." Lyra described her situation and now I'm surprised that didn't happen to me. 

"What the hell? I more or less just took over what seems to be the female version of myself with no memories." With the tone of the conversation changing, I didn't feel as stressed since I'm now sure Lyra came from the same world as me. 

"Hang on, female version?" However, that quickly changed, as I may have just exposed myself once again to information I didn't want to admit. 

"U-umm yeah?" I did not have the proper preparation to answer this question. I could see the cogs in Lyra's brain moving as she processed the implications. 

"So you're telling me that if you were female in, let's say, the previous world we came from, I would have dated your degenerate self." Lyra leant on her arm while pinching the bridge of her nose as if she were frustrated. 

"W-well I can't deny that I've always wished I was a girl so I could date you." Before I could think about my words, I let my intrusive thoughts speak since I had nothing else to say. 

"I-I don't know if I should be mad or glad." I could guess Lyra was deciding whether or not she should have feelings for me. 

'Urghhh, this feels weird now, I know I wish Saki from my old world turned into a female, but now that it has become a reality, it doesn't sit right.' However, despite this feeling, I still wanted to stay together. The fact that she? He? Is from my old world, I am no longer alone, the one thing I wanted ever since getting here. 

'It doesn't matter in the end who Saki is, if anything, this is great news. My best friend turned into a girl and I no longer have to feel so detached from everything.' Taking a step back and looking at the bigger picture of the situation, there wasn't a good reason to distance myself or disconnect. 

'I already know there are no surprise snakes under her skirt.' I almost laughed out loud at the thought, but I can imagine Saki's mind is not in the greatest headspace right now. 

'It'd be criminal of me to leave such an adorable girl like her. Although she has some mental issues, it is heavily outweighed by the fact that she is the perfect partner for me right now.' With my thoughts more organised, I could finally give Saki a proper response. 

"Before I say anything, I have one question for you Saki." After an agonising 30-second wait in silence, Lyra finally spoke up. I instantly straightened my back and held my hands together in hopes they would stop shaking. 

"Do you genuinely love me?" My hands stopped shaking and a glimmer of hope flashed in my heart. The answer was obviously yes, but a part of me knew I should give it some thought. It would be weird if I instantly yelled yes like I wanted to.

'I've always had a crush and that has never changed. I do feel bad for taking advantage of the situation, but who wouldn't? I'm sure Lyra felt the same since she already knew who I was as a person.'

'It has also been the safest I've ever felt in my entire life and I don't want to lose that.' Thinking of all the reasons why I wanted to be with Lyra, my feelings still felt genuine. 

 "Yes, I love you Lyra." I felt like crying, but I looked Lyra directly in the eyes to show I was not lying. 

Without saying a word, Lyra got up from her chair and walked towards me. She then leant in, pushing my back onto the bed and before I knew it, we were kissing. 

Kissing? Huh, I thought there would have been some catch or Lyra was just about to leave, but no, she kissed me! 

After a few seconds, Lyra pulled away and let her body fall to the side so she was lying next to me. 

"I do as well, no matter where we come from, it doesn't invalidate what we feel. I knew you would be freaking out about whether it was okay for us to date, but how I see it, I gained an old friend back in a body I can enjoy~." Lyra licked her lips as she went the horny route, but she had a point. 

Lyra had to live in this world without any way to get back and now she has me. Although, it must feel a little weird, why should it stop us from enjoying ourselves? 

"So you did just like women for their bodies!" It had been a joke I made in the past since she never had a reason why she only dated them. 

"What can I say? The thought did cross my mind that if you were a girl, I would fuck the shit out of you." 

"I-I…" I was at a loss for words. Lyra returned to her usual self, but even more bold than before! It made me question why I overthink so badly. I wonder if I had been more proactive in seeing if Lyra was transported here, things would have been a lot less painless. 

"Haha~ we can do that later." Lyra smiled and probably stopped talking before she got too out of control and we deviated off topic. We did fall silent but we took this moment to think and just process everything.

*Sigh* "Really need to stop freaking out over everything." Once again, I needed to trust that not everything was out to get me. The overwhelming amount of anxiety I get makes it hard, but I just need to remind myself that it will be okay. 

"I can't blame you, It must suck spawning in and having no clue what's going on around you. Plus, you didn't have the chance to grow up again like I did." It was a relief to hear Lyra understand my predicament. 

"It has been so stressful. I didn't want to seem like some freak who didn't know anything and tried to figure it out given the context we were in." Being able to let go and talk about how awful the last few days have been feels amazing. 

'Now do I tell Lyra about the apple?' I was set on not telling Lyra, but I felt that I could trust her on the topic. It would also allow me to warn her of Raja and how we need to get stronger. 

The risks were unknown, but seeing as we were both most likely transported by the same apple, I'm sure she can understand. I needed to take my advice and just trust my judgement that nothing would go wrong.