The Tears of Our Children part 2

Ohta was watching Hasumi and the girls play outside by the museum for a little while before he started to worry. Meioshi was gone again. He didn't want to admit it aloud, and he probably was being selfish, but he had hoped that Meioshi would stay home after her work was done at the okiya village. He saw the scars on her eyes just like everyone else. Though she moved like she wasn't blind, Hasumi looked at her with that darkened aura like she saw what happened or had seen something like it before. Ohta adored Hasumi, but she was creepy when she was quiet like that. She was like an old hag who lived in the shadows, trapped in a child's body with eyes that had seen the beauties and the tragedies that had befallen on the world. Sometimes, it scared him. Being a little shrine maiden, Hasumi made Ohta fear Shinto religion in a way that was different from the priests who would buy young boys at the Pink Oyster. There was a terror lurking behind her sunny smile and disposition that hadn't truly gone away. It would probably pass away with time, but it was here right now. Unsure if Meioshi lost her eyes because of a demon or an accident, Ohta was pacing around, checking on his little grapple bears, or visiting Meioshi late in the night just to up and leave in the morning so she wouldn't know he was there.

He was probably just being paranoid, but he didn't want to lose Meioshi now. As much as he loved his adoptive grandmother and her sassiness, he mainly wanted to be her apprentice and reopen the school Meioshi had come from to raise other girls and boys the way his new grandmother had. He heard many stories about the doctor's childhood, laughed at several, and blushed at others with some measure of pride or admiration. Someday, he would raise, protect, and spank a little girl with the same fire as the doctor, but he wanted to make sure that he was as knowledgeable as that little girl's teacher. When Liuxian came to chaperone Hasumi for a little while, Ohta stood up and let the man take over before he went to look at the doctor's tree. He had been visiting and staring at it ever since she brought him here to go to school. Today was no different.

He could remember the day he climbed up the doctor's banyan tree down to the hour. It was during a sunset in the spring. His grandmother was scared of him falling down, so Meioshi told him to cling to her, and the doctor climbed the tree to show him the colorful papers she would hang on branches. He was eight at the time. Sold to Rosanjin, beaten to submission by his own father, no idea what happened to his mother. He was scared. His one moment of freedom came when the doctor brought him to Heiwa along with the other children. There weren't many back then. Girls didn't start running to Meioshi for safety until Nayoko ran away and went to great lengths to harbor him away until Meioshi got to him. Nayoko was the closest thing Ohta had to a big sister. She protected Ohta like her life depended on it until the day she got sick. When she died, he was heartbroken and grieved like he lost his family. In truth, he did. He lost a protector, but she inspired him to protect the others the way she protected him. Ohta continued Nayoko's struggle to get out, but Meioshi didn't let him forget that he was a child in the meantime. He may have been forced to be mature very early, but, like his other brothers and sisters of the okiyas, they never forgot that they were still children and still deserved love. When Ohta watched Meioshi fight back, he saw the true mother within her and clung to it. Anyone who was remotely younger than Meioshi would sneak away one by one after seeing what she was willing to do to end their misery. When she made the deal with Rosanjin to take all minors away, the Tennin Matsuri (or "March of Angels") as the House Mother called it began.

Walking over to the doctor's banyan tree, Ohta climbed up it to capture his red paper. It had a small bell and Nayoko's favorite flower attached to it. A symbol of importance to him. He plucked it off a branch that he didn't want anyone to grab and read it to himself. To be adopted. His one wish that was halfway completed. He started to smile at the memory of his beloved doctor giving him a bath the night before he played in this tree with some of the other kids.

"Little Ohta? Why are you hiding in the towels, little one?" Meioshi asked, giggling at his play.

He popped out of the pile of colorful towels with a cheerful smile and sang, "Banzai!"

"Oh! Well, hello to you, too!" Meioshi greeted, kneeling before him.

"Why take a bath when I can steam up in these?" Ohta asked, hiding away again. Meioshi uncovered him, tickled his sides, and took out a washcloth to clean him up. He sat there, blushing and watching Meioshi work, until he asked, "Mama Mei-Mei? How come the moon looks so big over here?"

"That's a supermoon, my Ohta. It gets big, big, big until it shrinks, shrinks, shrinks into a perfect circle," she replied, earning a chuckle as she lightly wiped his face. "It's especially beautiful when it's golden during the harvest season."

"Do the stars get bigger like the moon, mama?" Ohta asked after a short silence.

"Hmm... I've never seen them get bigger, but I have seen them change sides. Groups of stars move around when the seasons change," Meioshi explained, careful as she washed Ohta's wounds.

"Does that mean the small stars stay where they are?" Ohta asked, earning a hum as an answer. "I need a special, small star to wish on then."

"Why a small wishing star?" Meioshi asked.

"So I can wish for a mommy," Ohta replied, earning a small embrace from Meioshi.

"We'll find one for you that's just right then, my Ohta. You need a mommy who will teach you all kinds of things, play games with you - "

"And fuss at me when I play in the towels!" Ohta cheered, turning to Meioshi with a bright smile.

The doctor blushed at this before covering the boy's head with a towel to muss his hair. He had been struck recently on his thigh. Bruising appeared. She treated it, painted a little animal on it, and moved on to wash his hair. Sojuro, the doctor's friend from the military, didn't enter the bathing room of her small clinic, but he did sit out on the engawa to watch the other children. They were playing around, curious of the doctor's clinic and smaller museum display. Her taxidermy collection was much smaller back then. Sojuro was an oddly quiet man, but he helped Meioshi guard the children on their way home to Heiwa and wasn't easy to identify as friend or foe. He was just... present. Ohta always found Sojuro to be an intimidating man. He seemed so tall, dark, and strong. He had a healthy build, dressed almost always in some form of armor, but he never spoke unkindly to anyone. He seemed to be fond of the doctor, though, and was practically always around her at her home. He spoke his softest and his warmest when she was around her. He was like an empath who picked up on other's energy. The doctor was warm and kind, so he spoke that way around others in her presence.

"Food's almost done, doc," Sojuro informed, leaning back against the wall.

"Oh, good! We'll be ready for - "

A small snore interrupted them before they both looked down at a sleeping Ohta. Meioshi smiled, kissed Ohta's head, and wrapped him up to carry him to bed. Sojuro stood up to stop the doctor for a second and stole a kiss from her. He whispered something to her to make her laugh then went to stir her food before it burned. The next day they were climbing the banyan tree. Throwing papers up to hang them on branches. It was a goal tree. The doctor said she didn't care much for wishes, so she instead hung goals on the tree that she wanted to complete in life. Some would take more time than others, but she believed they could be done and were practical to achieve.

Hearing shuffling behind him, Ohta turned to see Sesshomaru watching him with a curious look in his eyes. He gasped before asking, "Oh! What are you doin' here, Sesshomaru?"

"Your leech is eating my cookies," Sesshomaru informed, looking quite miffed at his misfortune.

"Leeches are ugly, little things that shouldn't exist," Ohta replied, flinching at the insult. "My grapple bears are cute!"

"That tree has no food on it," Sesshomaru said, probing Ohta for an explanation as to why he was so high in the wishing tree.

"It's the tree of life goals, you closeminded warlord," Ohta joked, looking at his paper again with a soft smile.

He climbed to the top to attach his red paper with blue and purple papers linked together already and tapped the bell to make it sound. It was a soft ting. He then climbed down quite acrobatically, landed on his feet with a soft thud like a landing cat, turned around to look at the tree as he backed away, and let out a sigh. It was easy to tell that the boy was bothered by something. What Sesshomaru saw next both surprised and angered him. He may as well have been watching Tadamasa comb Meioshi's hair again. Ohta went underneath the tree's roots and took out a small box. From it, he took out a pipe, rolled up a bit of tobacco, and lit it. Sesshomaru gasped when the boy took a few puffs from the pipe with a proficiency that rivaled an elder. It was a smaller pipe, so it was meant for him and probably held an amount that he could take without becoming sick or heavily addicted, but the fact remained that Ohta was smoking.

"Who taught you that?" Sesshomaru demanded, eyes narrowing with disapproval.

"The doctor," Ohta replied, folding his arms as he leaned against the tree. "I don't do it often. You don't have to freak out about it."

"Why would she teach you to do that?" Sesshomaru asked.

"I was angry at her..." Ohta answered, memories playing out across his eyes like ghosts walking across a plain. "I got tired of waiting for her to set me free from the okiyas. I didn't want the village to be improved. I didn't want to see any more children like me or the others be sold off anymore. I knew that she was trying everything in her power to stop Rosanjin. I could see it. But... I just got so tired of it. I lashed out, cried, begged her to take me home. That woman could fight like nobody's business and take hits that would break bone! She was willing to be dragged in the mud by a rope and carriage! All for us. I was wrong to be mad at her, and I wasn't mad at her. I was angrier that Rosanjin could get away with what he was doing. That it was legal to put a price on another person's soul regardless of age. I caught her smoking one night when she and Rosanjin got into this bad screaming match. It was enough for me to start crying. She was almost numb when she was doing it. It was the only thing keeping her calm, stopping her from going on a rampage. So, she offered to teach me. Figured if I got like that, then maybe I would need something to calm me down. When you're in that kind of business already, sex isn't something you really wanna turn to. Can't stand it as is. Why do it more? So, I smoke when I'm too numb to lash out anymore or just really worried."

Sesshomaru was quiet, but he had enough courage to ask, "Why are you so worried?"

"I'm not worried anymore. Just numb," Ohta confessed. "How the fuck do you go from losing your eyes so violently to just... growing them back within the same breath? It doesn't make any sense. What kind of sick bastard tests someone like that? What was that test even for? I...! How many more tests does she have to complete before it's enough? How much more pain does she have to be put through before she can just be a mom again? Why won't they leave my mom alone? I hate this!"

Sesshomaru said nothing as the boy repeated that last line. Tears started falling before he pulled the pipe out of his mouth and started shaking. That's what it was. He wasn't numb, worried, or angry. He was scared. He had to have been scared for years. For two of those years, Meioshi was trapped in hell. There was no telling how Ohta felt about her missing. For a moment, Sesshomaru felt the real weight of guilt on his shoulders as he watched Ohta cry. He made Meioshi leave Heiwa to find the Gogyo Stone not thinking about how others felt about her being gone so often. He had assumed the festival was just that. Some party for the town to celebrate. It didn't occur to him that her being away from home without prior notice was linked to someone else's suffering. Sesshomaru thought about Rin and almost instantly saw a likeness of her in Ohta. Was she crying right now? Upset that he was gone for longer periods at a time? Not wanting to see her cry, he walked up to Ohta and held him in his arm for comfort. Ohta gasped at Sesshomaru's sudden bout of kindness and let out a few choice tears before he backed away and blushed at the exchange. He puffed some bits of his pipe to calm down again before Sesshomaru spoke.

"Why is this not simply a Wishing Tree?" Sesshomaru asked to change the subject.

"The doctor doesn't believe in wishes. Those can be broken," Ohta answered, looking at his chain of life's goals. "Dreams can sometimes be terrors. Promises aren't always kept. A goal, however, is achievable. You dictate how fast you achieve it. If you want more time to reach that goal, you hang it higher on the tree. If you think you're closer than you thought, you hang it lower. Once the goal is complete, you fully remove it and thank those working in the heavens whether they be multiple gods, one god, or just a guardian spirit for watching over you through your journey. You can choose to celebrate your accomplishment or just acknowledge it, but it is yours to keep and to commemorate. No one can take it from you. So, we don't ever call this the Wishing Tree or treat it like one."

Sesshomaru's eyes softened at this. He wouldn't admit it aloud, not even to himself, but he liked Meioshi's tree better. It was practical, symbolic, and just as spiritual, but you could control your fate. Nothing had to be granted or blessed unless you wanted it to be. The journey and the goal were yours to complete in life. The time he spent writing wishes could've been better spent writing goals and guessing at how and when to complete them. He then wondered which goals were the doctor's and which were Ohta's.

"You had a red goal in your hand. Did you need more time to complete it?" Sesshomaru asked.

"Better safe than sorry," Ohta said, chuckling bitterly and taking a short puff. "It... was just to have more courage."

"Courage?" Sesshomaru questioned. "Take it down."

"Huh?" Ohta questioned, turning to the inu prince.

"You aren't a coward. I've seen you fight," Sesshomaru responded. It wasn't as kind as a compliment, but it was impactful like one.

"Oh! No, no! It's not the courage to fight. I've already taken my revenge on who I wanted," Ohta said, laughing at Sesshomaru's seriousness. It was endearing. He then admitted, "It's courage to ask her something important. I don't want to be afraid of her anymore."

"Her?"

"Mama Mei-Mei. I gave her that name after she spanked me for the first time," Ohta said, laughing a little. The memory was fond enough to soften his eyes and features. He continued, "I said something rude like any other kid who doesn't know any better. She yanked off her slipper and bopped me a few times! I liked that about her! She was sassy, playful, sweet, only wanted what was best for me. It's a shame you didn't know her back then. But... that's what makes this so much harder for me to ask... I... Promise you won't say anything, Sesshomaru."

"Lord," Sesshomaru corrected, raising a brow at the dismissal of his honorific.

"Cut me some slack! I'm hormonal over here!" Ohta said with a bit of seriousness in his face. Sesshomaru said nothing and let him continue, "That red goal... was for the courage to ask Meioshi to be my real mother. I need more time to build it up because I'm still scared. I killed the man who sold my body for money, even was ambushed by some of my clansmen, and none of that is scarier than that one question! I can't listen to her give me her speech about danger. I don't wanna hear her say something else. I won't know what to do! I don't want to be afraid of her saying no. I want to be able to understand her decision and move on. But... you should've seen her screaming. The lashing, her being dragged through actual shit, her being beaten with clubs. There are plenty of mothers out there from humans to animals to even demons like you who would go above and beyond for their kids, but this woman will go to war and endure every punishment for hers. I'm not saying I want some warrior to be my mother, but... I don't know. I just want her."

For Ohta's sake, Sesshomaru made a promise to himself that he dared not write on paper. He knew the doctor's goal tree wasn't a wishing tree, but his lordship decided to treat it like one. Just for Ohta. He promised to make their rivalry strictly a competition of fighting prowess and honor. Nothing more passed that. For Ohta's sake, he promised to protect Meioshi from harm and death, so that in the future - no matter how many years it would take - Ohta would be able to ask Meioshi to formally adopt him...