The Tragic Life Will Now Turn Into A Comedic One

2023 - U.S.

All the other characters, thus, passed away. It was me, Hungary Bee, walking onto a random road, when some bullies grabbed me and dragged me all the way along for no reason but the lazy writing of someone cruel-hearted. When I woke up after blacking out and being bullied, I went to see a therapist, a 45-year-old woman named Sofia Smirch.

Sofia looked at the X-rays, her eyes widening in excitement. "Your X-rays are very rare, Mr. Bee!" she exclaimed.

I was confused, my brain still aching with pain. "Like what? I don't understand anything for now. My brain is just in intense pain, and all that. I should probably go home and have some sleep."

But Sofia was getting more and more excited about my condition. "But, Mr. Bee, it's so rare and amazing at the same time. You know, the last person I saw with this condition was very bad at mathematics and calculations, but when he got hurt like this, an injury in the brain, he became a super genius in mathematical calculations and all that."

I raised an eyebrow, skeptical. "Yeah, surely, just hit every student who's dull in our country on the same spot, and he'll turn out to be a super genius like Sherlock Holmes, right?"

Sofia's expression turned serious. "It's not a good way to judge my remarks on this. I'll be serving this profession for almost 13 years now. Don't you think my advice for you..."

I cut her off, laughing. "The way I see it, 13 years with a kind of job are a lot. You need to see a therapist yourself, old lady."

I walked out of the clinic, making fun of her remarks. But little did I know, something was about to change my life forever.

That night, some men broke into my house as I was trying to sleep. But my brain was aching with pain, and chaotic thoughts were racing through my mind. Suddenly, I stood up, feeling super confident in front of the thieves.

"So, 51 body count, nice guns or rifles, I must say," I said, my voice firm.

The thieves were taken aback, their guns shaking in their hands. "Hands behind your back, now!" their boss barked.

But I just scratched my head, feeling like I knew exactly what was going on. "Your hands are shaking, budd. Doesn't seem you've done this before, have you? You know what? The interesting fact is, your shoes are really dirty. Hmmm... I think I know a cop who lives right beside our house. He wakes up at night, 3 pm, sleepwalks with his gun, and I believe now he's probably going to hit the stamp box with his head just after 5 minutes. And when he sees some non-random footprints, he'll call for the other cops, and you'll all get arrested."

The thieves looked at each other, unsure of what to do. "Now, I believe it's not right that some men who have never killed a person will suffer just because they tried to rob to feed their children," I said, my voice calm. "I believe in second chances, so I provide you one. You have 2 minutes to decide what to do next. I'm going for some sleep."

The thieves quickly made their way out of the same window they broke in through. I went back to bed, feeling a strange sense of satisfaction.

The next morning, I woke up feeling confused. I couldn't understand what was up with me behaving like a high-class genius detective. I went back to Sofia's clinic, eager to get some answers.

Sofia was thrilled to see me. "Yaaaa! Awesome! Now, that means the injury affected you in a very interesting way," she exclaimed. "You think about a character, and you magically turn into that character's characteristics. What can be more interesting than this?"

I was horrified. "What! Does that mean I've gone crazy?"

But Sofia just smiled. "Dopamine blasts in your Dura Matter activated, that's what I'm talking about, Bee. You are not crazy. You were Sherlock Holmes last night. You're blessed with a kind of magical power to get any character's characteristics. It can be smartness, bravery, or even a funny character. Well, best of luck for you. But I'll keep doing my research on your brain, and you please manage some time for me during your free time."

I left the clinic, feeling like my life was about to change in ways I couldn't even imagine.