Chapter 4 Loses

My heart pounded in my chest as I made my way through the village to Zaira's house. For the past two days, I have been looking for her. I needed to ensure she was okay. We had to start planning our escape from this place.

I thumped on my friend's door, determined to see her today. The door opened, but it wasn't Zaira. Again.

"I told you yesterday. My wife is sick! Go home to your husband, woman!" Zeon yelled into my face instead of a greeting.

I stepped back, my ears buzzing from his loud shout. He craned above me, crowding me off their stairs.

"I can help her, speed her recovery, change bedding, and make her some tea. I am sure your hands are full right now," I tried in a softest tone I could.

I watched the man's eyes narrow, and his lips stiffened.

"None of your dark tricks in this house! You hear me? Not under my roof!"

Zeon lifted his hand, and I squeezed my hands into fists, biting my cheek from the inside. He could hit me, but I won't leave. I won't back down. I heard people talking behind us. It was a time when everyone dropped their kids off at the schoolyard. Zeon must have heard them, too, because he lowered his hand down and stepped back, shutting the door with a loud bang.

Desperate. That is how I felt, crouching in Zaira's backyard later in the day. I had just returned from an assignment. And instead of picking up my kids from school, I snuck behind Zaira's house to her bedroom window. My eyes scanned the room, searching for any signs of her, but it was empty. My heart sank. I didn't know what to do.

Days went by before I caught a glimpse of Zaira again. She exited the house and headed to the plaza.

I started walking towards her, but stopped midway. Was it even her? Same height, same skin color. But this person was covered in dark grey cloth from head to toe. Zaira hated grey. Hinged posture, labored steps. The familiar spring in her steps was gone. She looked just like another shadow-woman.

My feet grew heavy. My knees softened, and I leaned on to the wall. I couldn't make even one step towards her. Like she was sick. Contagious with the black death. Like if I were to come closer, I would become one of the many empty shells waddling around this town.

What a dumb idea! This is my friend. I have to help her.

I pushed off the wall and caught up to Zaira, tugging at the limp hand to get her attention. Her dull brown eyes flickered to my hand. She froze, but then continued walking, like nothing happened.

Zaira was silent, and I couldn't force myself to speak. Words stuck in my throat like a cotton ball. We proceeded to the square, caught up in a wave of women following to the same location.

After we all received our assignments, and women started to head towards their locations for today, I finally gained control over my mouth. I tugged on Zaira's hand, holding her back.

"Hey," I whispered, "How are you?"

My question didn't get a response.

As we approached the dark alley between the two buildings, I pushed Zaira in the shadow. My hands were shaking as I tried to frantically sense her aura, hoping for some clue to what was going on with her.

A wave of shock washed over me: there was a massive gap in the center of her aura. It was as if someone had ripped away her magic, leaving a void in its place.

I pulled my hands away from the woman's body as if it burned me. I had never seen anything like this before. It was one thing to lose your magic gradually as punishment from a higher force or a malignant curse. But to have it disappear so abruptly was unheard of.

While I was contemplating what had happened, Zaira left my weakened hold and walked away. After the shock subsided, I realized that I should go, too.

As I trudged through streets, my mind raced with thoughts. Every step felt heavier as I approached the destination - a small shop, my place of work for today.

Startled by the bell at the entrance, I looked up. Bruno wasn't there. Only his assistant, Rod. I exhaled in relief. The owner of the shop and a main supplier of goods in the village returned from his trip a couple of days ago. But I had already grown tired of the man's lewd attention. I was at the shop on duty every day since Bruno arrived in the village.

The work was monotonous, stocking shelves and cleaning, and it gave me time to think. My mind kept wandering, trying to find a solution to the problem at hand. Zaira's state was overwhelming. I was now completely alone.

I heard the loud noise from the street and peaked out the window. A tall woman with long black hair jumped off the horse and threw the rains to Enoch's wife. She kissed Enoch on the cheek, and they proceeded to his house. I haven't seen anyone even remotely this vivid on these streets for days, and it brought a weird sense of normalcy.

As the day drew to a close, I came to the realization that I needed to act fast. I was powerless to help Zaira from within this place. My own abilities paled in comparison to the task at hand. But I knew I could find help outside these walls. I could share what was happening in this place with the nearest coven. Despite being maligned by the Sun Congregation, witches still held weight in society.

When Atti finally came home from the smithery, I had a dinner and a hot, potion-spiced tea waiting for him. I curled the toes in my shoes, trying to keep the rest of my body calm and steady.

Vigorously stirring my own energizing herbal infusion, I watched as Atti sipped his drink. By the time we head to bed, the potion was supposed to clear his mind and make him more open to new ideas to take effect.

Atti looked up at me, his eyes still kind and loving.

Do not trust your man. - Zaira's words spiraled in my head as I cleaned the table and prepared to be.

Finally, I shut the door to our bedroom and sat in the bed. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. He will understand how important it is to leave this place soonest. He should.

I told him everything: about what happened at the river and what I've seen at the barn. I shared all my fears and concerns, my gut feeling hunches. How I always did.

But as I spoke, the line between his eyebrows was getting deeper and deeper.

When I stopped, I rubbed my hands and looked away at the closed window blinds. The other day after I mentioned the cold draft from the window, Atti covered up all the cracks with some solution.

He was always so caring, my dear husband.

"You have been talking to that crazy woman… Zaira, haven't you?"

My heart started beating stronger. And I rubbed my hands together again to get rid of the shivers. Atti rarely spoke to me in this voice.

"Pastor told us all about her. She is aberrant and disobeys the order of the Sun, with her vulgar behaviour. Stop allowing her poison into your ears! Stop talking to her!"

"Have you seen here recently? There is no more of her left to disobey. And since when do you decide who do I talk to?"

"I have better things to do than look after some mad hens. It's none of our business - she has a husband. And I have to tell you what to do! Since you suggest an insane idea of traveling through the winter forest with no destination! This is madness, Ari!"

The air was tense, and my husband's face was a mask of confusion and disbelief. I have never seen him this way. He was always on my side. Was Zaira right? Did he change?

The time passed, and we were still running in circles. The potion wasn't working.

He turned his back to me, facing the wall, and pulled the blanket tightly around himself. I stared at his shoulders for a moment. What do I say to make him believe? How do I make him understand what is at stake here?

It was as though a chasm had opened up between us, and I couldn't bridge the gap.

As I lay awake in bed that night, the darkness pressing on my eyelids, my mind raced with thoughts of what could happen if we stayed in this place. I had to do something. Words were futile.

As I made up my mind, I turned to look at Atti. He was breathing soundly, already asleep. He was never been able to sleep after a fight before. I loved Atti with all my heart, but I couldn't stay here. I had to protect my children and myself.

My heart was palpitating so hard, I was sure the entire village could hear it. Keeping quiet, I got up to gather our things.