It's Okay To Cry

 Zain's point of view….

   The moment the door closed, I went down on my knees, clutching my heart. It was breaking into pieces and I could not do anything about it. I did not stop her from leaving and I am not sure it's the right thing to do. What can I do for her to forgive me?

  Wasn't she supposed to tell me that she has not forgiven me instead of going this extreme and am I to hate her after everything? It's obvious she stopped loving me a long time ago and I had foolishly thought she still loves me.

  "Zain, it's your fault. If you had not looked in another direction, what is happening now would have been prevented. Deal with the rejection or find a way to get her back but let  her off for a while, you both needs your space"

I advised myself which seemed like the worst advice ever.

   I am not strong enough to live without her, she actually gave me my ring back, wow!

 "Jenny, why?"

I kept asking that question. This is too much for me to bear. She indeed planned this revenge and struck when I was vulnerable. I must commend her act of revenge.

  A knock sounded at the door and I wished she had to be the one coming back to tell me everything is a prank, I would be the biggest fool to believe that.

What if she really comes here to tell me she had changed her mind? How would I feel. No, she didn't change her mind, she will not do such things. She left and she will never come back.

  The knock sounded again and it opened afterwards. I heard some footsteps rushing towards me and I prayed so hard to let it be her but I was disappointed when I raised my face up and saw Emma looking at me, with a panicked expression.

  She clutched down to my level and took my hands in hers,"are you alright Zain?You are shaking badly"

She asked me and I couldn't bring myself to answer her.

   I was wishing for the impossible that I had no reply for her.

"What happened to you Zain?You look horrible."

I smiled sadly and tried to keep calm,

"Nothing really."

But she looked unconvinced and her grip tightened even more on my hand,

"Zain, please talk to me."

I felt tears streaming down my cheeks and I couldn't help but shake my head slowly from side to side. 

I didn't want to cry in front of her. That would make me look more vulnerable but it's okay to cry

"I am fine, Emma" I mumbled between my tears."Really, there' s nothing wrong."

She looked confused and said:"You are alright yet your room looks messed up. Does this have to do with my highschool classmate, did she ditch you?"

   I smiled and struggled to my feet``And why do you care? What if I am hurt, don't I have the right to shed a few tears?"

I yelled and she flinched, stepping back a little.

  "Stop being a butterfly and leave my room this minute?"

I ordered and she ran out, closing the door after her.

  Yelling wasn't going to help matter for me or so I thought. I figured out that a few things in my room are still in order, not minding the broken mirror on the wall, I proceeded to finish off the whole order arrangement. I want here to look messy like my heart is right now.

After all, this is how my life should be.

  Someone barged in and I turned ready to lash at the person but I stopped in my tracks seeing the person.

  "Zain, what's going on? officer James called and said you are not picking up. Why do you look so horrible and this place like this? If it's about Jenny, she will be back"

I pulled my lips up at what he said. Thomas is funny. If only I could believe his words that Jenny will be back. She can't come back.

  "She is already back and left. She never went missing, rather she went to have a good thing with some guy and after that, sent to the tape to me"

  I replied, staggering on my feet. I could see the shock on his face. I am still in shock too, talk more of Thomas. He looked like he heard the most horrible thing ever.

 "What, that's Impossible!,"

He exclaimed, shaking his head in disbelief. He reached for my hands and looked at me, with worried eyes "Zain, did something happen between you two that will make her do such a thing?"

I smiled"yeah,I cheated on her as you might have known and she never forgave me. She took her pound of flesh. I don't blame her anyway."