Past Meeting Present 2

   Heavy silence engulfed us both . I was still trying to process the fact that he is sitting right before my eyes. I never thought I was going to even see him again. 

  I squeezed my eyes shut and the moment I opened them, I found the courage to speak.

  "See, Lucas, before you judge me, hear me out. First of all, I am sorry for the way I treated you. whatever that was going on with me then, I should have not lost contact with because you were someone who cared about me"

I paused for a while waiting for some kind of response which never came.

I swallowed heavily trying to find the courage to continue talking, 

"It was never my intention to do what I did"

I added and kept looking straight to him. There was nothing wrong in saying it out loud. He did deserve an explanation after all.

"Is that all?"

  He asked coldly and I widened my eyes in surprise. Did he just ask that? What else is he expecting me to say? To tell him all that had happened?

"I am afraid, that will be all"

I responded, looking at my newly painted nails. Mitchell did that for me.

  "I thought we had something going on. I was hoping we could be something more but suddenly, you disappeared without a trace. I searched for you, I went by to your brother's house to ask after you but he never saw me for once. I waited for you for weeks, hoping for a call from you, none came and after thirteen years, I found you and you were married with kids. Woah Jenny, did I do something to you"

   Lucas rambled and my heart was breaking into pieces. I did hurt him. I knew he cared about me but I never realized he loved me. 

Funny enough, he didn't look surprised seeing me.  Somehow, he knew I will be here or that I own here, no wonder he never acted surprised when he saw me

  "I am so sorry,Lucas. It was not intentional. I did not mean to do what I did. Please forgive me"

"Of course, I have to. Why should I hold grudges against you when your absence has given me the best gift ever. I don't know what it is that happened to you that made you cut me off, I honestly don't care. I hope you are happy the way I am?"

   His words were like daggers stabbing into my soul.

I shook my head sadly, this should be expected. I hurt him and I understand if he is angry. I would not say cutting him off was something I could not have done. How was I going to explain to him that I had kids for my brother in law and that I was threatened to leave him? What I did was for the best.

   "That is a good thing to know."

I stated and the silence engulfed us again. 

   He smirked after awhile and picked up his coffee and took a sip, dropping it, he stood up, "by the way, you have a nice place here. I will be sure to drop by with my kids and wife next time to say hello to you"

  I stood up too and forced a smile.

 "That will be nice. Have a good day"

I mumbled and he nodded then started leaving the restaurant. I watched him leave with a heavy heart. He must hate me so much right now. He had changed totally, this is not the Lucas I know. Lucas I know would want to hear every detail of what had happened to me in the past thirteen years. I guess people change with time. I am the only one who is not changing. I am still me, same attitude, same ways of thinking, the same habits, I think.

   As soon as he reached the exit, he stopped and turned back looking at me. We made eye contact for a brief moment before he turned and walked out. The pain of watching him leave like that, with hurts in his eyes, was overwhelming.

  I stood rooted at a spot until I felt a slight touch on my shoulder. I turned and it was Louisa handling me the coffee I asked for. 

  I took it and headed towards my office. 

  "An old friend huh?"

I nodded in response to her question. I could have said more but I was not in the mood to talk and Louisa understood that.