I didn't know what was weirder, the fact that we were the only people on that island or the fact that I liked that. It was around six. The inside of that house was better than I imagined it would be. There were literally new clothes for us both in the bedroom we'd be sharing. And for once I chose not to think of it as a waste. That's what I always did and it made me fail to enjoy the good in anything. So instead of complaining like I normally would have, I admired them and thanked Gabriel. He had stared at me oddly. I knew that in his head he had already planned a response for what I would have otherwise said.
He had taken off his suit jacket and changed his shirt for a t-shirt. Such a small changed but it made him look even better. I would never stop wondering how he managed to look good in everything. I didn't know what he had planned for us to do there but I really wanted to go by the beach, and when I suggested it he had assured me that we'd go later on.
" What will we do here?"I asked standing in the living room and looking at the fish inside the aquarium that had been set there. Wondering who fed them because there was no one around.
" Well do whatever you want us to do. "
" Like what exactly?"
" Well make it up as we go,"
With a shake of my head I had decided to let it be. I was sure we couldn't get bored. I asked him whether he was hungry and he said no. But he added that if I wanted to cook I could, and if I didn't then it was also okay because there was already food in the fridge.
I, of course decided to cook. I needed something to do. And I knew that cooking would help me absorb the changes of my surroundings even better. He offered to help and I almost laughed. The laughter was at the very tip of my tongue but I held it in when I realized he was being very serious.
" You?" I frowned and he stare at me as if I had offended him.
" What's that supposed to mean?"
I pursed my lips and shook my head, then I forced a smile and started making my way to the kitchen.
" Nothing, come on, " I said as I walked past him. He reached for my hand and pulled me to him. Then with his hand snaked around my waist he pressed his forehead to mine.
" I'm glad you're here, " he told me. And it was one of those rare instances when he said something in a way that implied he wasn't joking,that he was as serious as he could be. I nodded and assured him I was glad as well. All while noticing that lately whenever he held me his grip was firmer than usual. Like he was trying to make sure I wouldn't get a chance to walk away or leave. I was sure he didn't even realize it. Otherwise he wouldn't have been doing it. I still never said anything because it was okay, I had no issue with it.
Just as I had guessed, his idea of helping me was standing by and pointing out all the things which he thought I should try changing, he also gave me his idea of motivation. Not a single ingredient came into contact with his hands. But made sure that the room never got silent. And at a certain point I had to stop working and step out of there because he became too much. I laughed until I got weak and my hands refused to lift anything. And when I recovered enough to go on, one glance at him had me laughing all over again. He had neither done nor said anything, but that's just the type of person that he was.
" Out! That's enough!" I said finally. Pointing to the exit and asking that he leave.
" I'll call you when the food is ready, "
He had refused. Saying he was in charge of ensuring that I cooked just right, which was odd since he didn't know the first thing about cooking.
But I was glad he stayed behind because deep down I had wanted him to.
And after I was done I served two plates,he seemed to want me as close to him as he could get me. If I dared step away then he'd throw me a reprimanding look and ask me to get closer. There was no more acting like he didn't care, the same went for me. If I wanted to tell him something then I just went ahead and did it. With the exception of THAT one thing of course. He sat at the counter while I preferred to eat while standing. I could tell by looking through the wide glass windows that the sun was setting. And we still hadn't even gone to the beach yet. But I knew that he'd keep his word and make sure we went. It was just like that time he had promised to play for me on the piano once we got back home but he had been unable to. Then today before we had left he had done just that.
" I think I owe you something, " had been the words he had used before he went ahead and played. Gabriel possessed this natural type of flair. He never tried to force it since it just naturally came out. He didn't have to act cool or refined because that's who he naturally was.
" I love your food, " he suddenly said out of the blue. His eyes on his plate. Then he smiled at me and took another bite. Normally with him it wasn't only about the things he told me but rather the honesty behind them. Of course it wasn't always the case but most of the times he told me these random things that had me smiling like a fool.
I loved how random he was. I liked that he never cared about what others thought. I liked that he liked me.
" Have you ever thought about opening up your own place?"
I shrugged, not wanting to answer that because it was Gabriel and the last thing I needed was for us to return to Seattle only for me to realize he had bought me a restaurant. He was very much capable of that and I didn't want him to do any such thing. If course it had always been my dream to own a place of my own, but I wanted it to be with my own money, that way it would mean all the more to me.
" One day, in the future... not now though, "
" Why not?"
" I'm not ready yet. "
He was about to argue that point but I talked and he kept quiet.
" I want to gain some experience first, then maybe later on I could think about having my own place. "
And by later on I meant in about ten or more years. The amount of money it would take to do such a thing was definitely a lot. But I was going to focus most of my savings on that.
" You know, I was actually saving up for college before I met you. "
The information interested him, he arched a brow and stared at me with what I termed as fascination.
" Culinary school?"
I reached out to feel the material of his shirt because it seemed so soft, and it was. And when I wanted to withdraw my hand he kept it in place with his.
" Nope, I wanted to study nursing. "
He seemed as confused as ever. Frowning, he asked me what I meant, and why he had never learnt of that after all the time we had been together. He actually believed I secretly wanted to be a nurse.
" It's not that I wanted to be a nurse, I just didn't think I had another option, if I became a chef the chances of getting a job were insanely low. "
He dug his fork into a piece of steak and fed it to me, his eyes darting across my face afterwards.
" You're good at what you do Layla. Why do you doubt that so much?"
" It's not about being good, " I clarified.
" It's about connections, experience... money, "
He wouldn't understand what I meant because he had never had to worry about such things. I don't even think Gabriel knew what the word poor meant. A person like him would never understand the kinds of hardships that others had to go through just to get what they wanted.
" I beg to differ, " he stated, tracing his thumb on my lower lip before he pushed back the strands of my hair.
" It's more about passion and drive than anything else Layla. "
" Of course you'd say that, in the real world those things don't matter. "
He shifted to sit facing me, then he pulled me to stand in the space between his legs and locked his fingers together behind my neck. Looking at me like I was all he could see, like I was all that mattered. I treasured that look.
" What does that mean?" He asked me and but didn't understand what he was referring to.
" The real world, what does it mean?"
He was so serious when asking me that I didn't even know what to respond. And when I thought about a probable response, only one thing came to mind.
" My world, "
Where you didn't have everything handed to you I would have added but I was wise enough not to because that wouldn't have been right.
" And so does that imply that I live in a fake world? If your world is real then what's mine?"
" Desirable, " I easily explained. He gave me a curt nod and glanced at the floor next to me, but he was still holding onto me.
" You think I'm entitled, don't you?"
He'd never asked me such a thing before and I hadn't expected him to do so. I shook my head, my eyes still on him even if he wasn't looking back. Gabriel chuckled and I watched as the tip of his tongue swiped out to lick his lips. It was a natural and unplanned action but it looked so hot I wanted him to do it again. A few more times if possible.
" Come on, let's go before it gets dark, " he suddenly said before he stood and held my hand. Then he started to lead me towards the exit. I hadn't expected that conversation to end so suddenly. And I hoped that he hadn't taken things the wrong way, it's not that I thought he was entitled. Lucky was a more suitable world. He had been lucky enough to grow up with everything he wanted and I had been unlucky enough not to. It was quite simple and I had no problem with it.
He tucked his free hand into his pocket, and I realized that we were heading towards the beach. The closer we got the lovelier it became. When we got to the actual sand I took off my flats and held them in my hand. It looked so soft I just had to step on it and know how it would feel under my feet.
" Will you not give me my phone back?" I asked and he reminded me that I'd get it when he chose to give it back. It's not that I had anything urgent to do with it, I was sure no one would call me. But I just wanted to have it back.
" It's nice here, " he commented and I agreed. We were walking along the water, and a couple of times the waves threatened to get to us but Gabriel would immediately step out of the way. He clearly didn't want to get wet. I watched as he stared at the lovely sunset, then he chuckled to himself and shook his head.
" May I ask you something?"
His formal tone had me a bit on edge. But I still asked him to go ahead and ask because I was curious about the nature of his question.
" What do you think of me?"
He smiled after asking, but I knew he wanted to hear the truth. And that I couldn't refuse to answer because it clearly meant something to him. I also recalled that he want the type of person that cared about what others thought of him, so why was he asking me?
" I think that..." Coming up with something was a but harder than I had expected. Most of the things that came up were either too deep or too uncivilized for me to utter. I thought a lot about him, but I suppose I considered those my personal thoughts and had never expected to actually share them with him.
" Be honest, go ahead, no judgement here, "
That definitely meant there would be judgement. The water somehow got to us and he cursed, I, however giggled because I hadn't been expecting it. And it felt really nice. So nice I wanted it to happen again. Glancing down at his shoes, Gabriel blew out a breath, then he leaned down and took them off.
" You're interesting, " I told him and he gave me a blank expression.
" Please expound, "
Another wave started making its way to the shire, but this time Gabriel didn't move either, he stared at it as it washed through his feet and retreated.
" You're fun to be with, and you're also really talented. "
Clearly those weren't the types of responses he wanted to hear. He bent down and rolled up the pants he had on despite them being already wet.
" I think you're trying to distract yourself from something, " I said after a while and he turned to glance at me. Then he narrowed his gaze and waited for me to go on. I didn't want to but he was staring too much.
" I don't know from what though, but there's definitely something at the back of your mind, "
My thoughts went back to the paintings but I wasn't planning on bringing them up. I once again felt his hold on my hand tighten. The other day when he had wrapped his hand around my wrist it had been strong enough to leave a slight mark. It faded after a while but it had me thinking.
" Hmm, that's a unique assessment, " he casually stated. His mind still on my words. I didn't like how he was never willing to talk, I told him everything he wanted to hear but when it was his turn to reciprocate he never did.
" Do you know what my biggest fear was as a child?" He suddenly asked me and I shook my head. He stopped walking and stood facing the beautiful beach. It really was a lovely place. If I lived there I'd walk around everyday, and if I owned it then I'd always make an attempt to visit it as much as possible.
" I was mostly scared of attention. I loathed it entirely, didn't want a thing to do with it. "
Well that didn't sound right. The Gabriel I knew was very fond of attention.
" Hard to believe, isn't it?"
" A little, yes. "
He chuckled and combed his fingers through his hair. " You're not buying that, are you?" He then asked and I scoffed, realizing it had been a freaking lie.