Chapter 86

Anna was alone once again.

She looked at the pregnancy result torn into pieces on the floor and the tears flowed freely.

She was so Afraid of so many things.

One might think she was having Tokophobia which is a pathological fear of pregnancy which can lead to avoidance of child birth, but her case was not really that of Tokophobia, even though what she feels is part of the meaning of Tokophobia.

She wanted to avoid having this baby by all means.

This baby that would ruin her home, her life and her family.

This baby that would only bring about excessive fear and a show off if her immorality.

This baby that would constantly remind her that she was not worthy to be called a mother because she had bore her out of lust not love.

She wondered what Joseph would think if he finds out she was pregnant for him.

He was already stalking her and professing stupid love to her, but will he still think of her if he finds out that she was pregnant for him?

His life is already ruined and so was that of Anna.

They were both likely to end up on the street because Joseph would loose his career and his life.

She on the other hand would loose her home and her face.

The papers would not stop talking about her.

Her family would be devastated.

She could not allow it.

For the first time in her life she was considering an abortion and then that fear of the unknown set in again.

She was so scared she opened her phone   to surf the internet. She wanted to find out more about Abortion and it's effect, the result she got shocked her.

'Women choose to do abortion for various different reasons. According to research, some women went through abortion so that their self esteem could be improved. At the same time, research has also shown that even though women who went through abortion have higher self-esteem for a short period of time, they usually end up regretting their choice'

Anna was surprised as she could not understand how abortion could increase anyone's self esteem, but then she was reading it on Google, where it is believed  that everything was true.

Research has also shown that abortion can lead to death.

Anna opened her mouth and the thought of death scared her because she had only been thinking of keeping her husband, she had not thought of what will happen to her husband and child if she dies trying to abort a child.

But she wouldn't mind dieing. That was what she deserved after all, and then she continued to read only to find out that even death does not ease her pain.

Abortion leads to psychological disorder, incase the death didn't come.

The conscious fear of what have been done in the past will continue to hunt her.

Anna became really scared.

She placed her hands on her stomach, but all she could feel was emptiness.

She was not enthusiastic about having this baby and she couldn't be.

She made up her mind to have the abortion any ways. If she dies, then Andrew could get better not knowing what his wife did behind his back.