Th_omas

" How about we help each other?" He says and I look up at him, eyes still wet from the tears streaming down my cheeks, heart freshly broken from the public humiliation and betrayal that was Lucas's breakup. I can faintly make out the first droppings of snow floating magically under the light of the street lamps. It's that time of the year, a time for wool coats, a time for relaxing, none of which I'll be doing. "I'm an orphan with a wicked aunt and a boyfriend who left her because she has nothing to her name, how could I possibly help you?" I say another sob escaping my lips. "Marry me" he replies and my eyes widen in anger. Is he mocking me?. I look into the eyes of this stranger and see he's dead serious. "I need a wife, you need a home, marry me and you'll have all you want". I nod.

A Snowy Marriage (A Christmas agreement)

"Exactly what are you always doing inspecting things?" I ask with something of a delighted glint in my eyes. I realise now exactly how we have been acting with each other, or exactly how I have been acting with him, and my face goes up in a blush.

I almost wonder why I ran into his arms earlier, why did I feel so safe and comfortable there, am I running mad. I'm guessing nineteen really isn't the age to fall in love, it isn't the age to give your heart out to someone just to only have it be handed back to you broken and shattered, but yet I still find myself falling for him, and completely just after four days, after four days, of which I had agreed to become something of his business partner, I find myself wanting to take it farther than being business.

There is just this weird impulse in me that makes me want to know everything about him, about his life, about his family, about his hobbies, about how living in this place could have possibly been when he was younger. I want to know all these things and more, I want to know exactly why he has three dogs, I want to know of his personal pains and his little triumphs, I want to know of each and every little thing about him, but yet the question comes to me, what if he doesn't like me back?.

What if in his eyes, we are only business partners and nothing more. Business partners simply for the sole purpose of him getting his inheritance back and me doing basically the same thing, to him we are only meant to help each other, nothing more and nothing less.

I can actually feel my shoulders drooping from this realisation. I don't know why this would elicit such a reaction from me, I who would have describe myself as someone who was distant from love, but yet this affection that i was feeling towards Adrian, it was something different. Something much stronger, would I be able to say it was not love, and just describe it as some form of minor infatuation.

Will I be able to say this feeling did not make me feel queasy whenever I was looking at him, and that it was just some minor signs of affection that i had developed towards him.

I need to get my head straight i realise as we approached his figure. I can't live from one life of hurt and throw myself into another one just so I can leave hurt again. I need to get my head straight, I need to get my head straight enough that I do not begin thinking wild thoughts whenever I see Adrian.

I need to get my mind straight enough that I know clearly, we are only here to help each other, there is nothing more to it than that. I need to have that clarity of mind that will tell me it doesn't really matter what we do with our lives after this, after the decisive snow of the last days in this year, we will probably never see each other again, and so I need to stop caring so much.

Chapter 97