Chapter131:kill people

I stood rooted to the ground looking at Alex who has not yet realized my presence. I didn't know what to do. Should I leave and pretend I didn't see anything, or approach him and ask him how the hell does he own such a collection of guns and to make matters worse, in our fucking bedroom.

Before I could decide on what to do, Alex turned around and looked at me. I didn't see any shock on his face because his face right now was void of any emotions. I parted my lips to say something but nothing came out of my mouth. Alex just looked at me and then he looked at the door that was open.

I didn't know what he was thinking and I was dying to know. I saw him turn his attention back to his guns without saying a single word to me. I decided that I have to master courage and talk to him.

"Alex, honey, why do you have all these guns in here?"I asked and waited for a reaction but Alex neither turned around nor did he talk." Alex, can you hear me? I'm asking you a question."I said again in hopes he'll talk to me but I heard him cock a gun or whatever sound it makes, I don't really know about guns. He then took the gun and he closed the safe with his finger prints then he set to leave.

Alex turned his back on me and he left and I followed behind him."Alex, where are you going with a gun?"I asked as I hurried to block his way."you are not leaving this place with a gun Alex. This shit is dangerous and you can get arrested for this. Alex please, honey, listen to me. I know you are mad at me. We can talk about this. Just calm down please."I pleaded with Alex and he just looked at me with that expressionless face of his.

"What do you want to talk about? You made it clear you don't want a child with me, what more do you want to talk to me about?"his deep voice asked and I sighed. At least he's talking to me right? Okay, I breathed in then I looked at him.

"I didn't say that, I said that I'm not ready but we can talk about this just please calm down please honey."I said.

"I'm calm, so let's talk. What do you want to talk about?"he asked.

"Please keep the gun away. I.. I.. Alex.. well.."I stuttered. I don't know what to tell him now.

"It's either you talk or I'm leaving."he said coldly and tears started flowing down my cheeks. I don't know what to say and Alex is just so cold and I can' taket this anymore.

"What do you want? I'll do anything you want?"I said wiping my tears and I bet I saw his face soften."just don't leave like this please. I'll do anything you want. Whatever it is." I added looking at him with my teary eyes.

"I want kids with you Kimberly. I want us not to wait at all. I want us to start a family together."he said and I blinked a few times registering what he just said. I didn't know what to say so I kept quiet then I heard Alex laugh mockingly." You won't do it ain't you. If you can't do that then there's nothing that I want other than that."he said and he turned to leave but before he could reach the door, I decided to talk.

"I will do that. I want that too. I'm scared Alex. I... I.."Alex heard her say and he stopped and then he smiled but then he frowned when he heard Kimberly sobbing loudly and he immediately turned around to see her breaking down with her body sitted on the ground crying uncontrollably.

"Fuck!!"he cursed then he hurried to her to lift her from the ground. He went too far and he regrets it. He just lost it when he heard Kimberly talk about using protection and that shit about not wanting a child. He got so angry when he imagined that's all he wanted with her. A happy family with her.

"Alex... I ..."she started saying when Alex held her body in his arms lifting her from the ground.

"Shhh.. baby. It's okay, just don't cry like this please. I will accept anything you say okay. Please just don't cry."Alex tried coaxing her as he went to sit on the couch.

He sat down with her in his arms coaxing her not to cry. Damnit. He cursed over and over again. Kim's cries turned to hickups and Alex run his hands on her back to calm her down.

"Alex.. please don't be mad at me."he heard her small voice say between her hickups.

"I'm not mad baby. I'm not mad anymore. I will do whatever you want. I'm sorry I made you cry like this baby. I'm really sorry."

"I want kids with you Alex but I'm scared. I'm scared you will leave me and our kids. I'm really scared of disappointing you too. What if I became a bad mother. I don't want to be a bad mother Alex. I want to love our kids. What if my kids hate me. What....."

"Shhh.. it's okay. Everything is going to be okay. Nothing of that sort is going to happen sweetheart. I'll always be here for you and you can never be a bad mother because you are my beautiful baby girl. We'll deal with everything together okay. Now don't think about anything and let everything flow."Alex told his wife.

"Please don't ever leave me Alex."she said and Alex smiled.

"Even you leave I will never leave. Because I love you so much."Alex said and Kim snuggled closer to his chest laying her head to his chest holding on to him for her dear life. Alex breathed a relief. Damn, he almost got a heart attack.

"Alex, the guns. Why do you have all those guns?"she asked and Alex stiffened. He doesn't know what to say. He had been so angry that he just thought of going to question the bastard that had come to kidnap his wife. He heard he's all healed up from where he shot him and he wanted to go get answers from him and so he went to get a gun. He didn't care if Kim find out. His madness was killing him and he couldn't think straight that's when he went to get a gun but he sensed her presence in the room and turned around to look at her, he saw that shocked face of hers. He didn't know what to tell her so he just stared at her and continued what he was doing because he couldn't possibly stop, she found out about the guns and now she's asking about them he don't know what to say.

"Baby, you need to eat first."he said and then he carried her to the kitchen where the food he had cooked was untouched. He just remembered she's not eaten and he kinda feel quilty for it.

"Alex, I want to know about the guns now."she demanded and Alex sighed putting her down on the stool.

"Eat first baby. I'll tell you when you eat."he said then he went to put some food in her plate then he went and he started feeding her.

After they were done eating Kimberly looked at him ready to listen to him. Alex looked at her curious gaze and he breathed in harshly. He just don't know how to tell her the truth because he doesn't know how she will take it.

"Baby, I..ummmm.. you can't get mad at me for this. Promise me you will understand this please. Whatever I say, it doesn't mean anything. I'm still the same Alex who loves you so much."Alex started and Kim frowned tears welling up in her eyes.

"Alex, do you perhaps, kill people?"Kim asked with a shaky voice.