CHAPTER 22

After Dylan's mother had told everyone to go home,Carly stayed back for a  while to get a chance to talk to Dylan since they had been interrupted.All her plans of waiting to come out after high school came crumbling down and now her brother knew and so did everyone else in their class and some of Dylan's basket ball teammates from other classes.That basically meant the entire school would know but it didn't scare her as she used to think it would.She was surprisingly okay with it,maybe because her brother didn't shun her and she knew he would now use it to tease her.The only part she knew would not go well was when it got to her parents,especially her mother.

    Dylan escorted her outside silently.It wasn't until they were there that they broke their silence.She spoke first.

     "I'm sorry your birthday turned into this."

     "It's okay,I wasn't a fan of those things anyway."

Carly smiled,"I know that.Why did you decide to do it?"

     "My mom suggested I should have fun with my classmates before we go to college but for me it was partly because I wanted you to come.After the diner scene last week I realized I wasn't anywhere near getting over you and I really hoped I would get the answers I wanted.I thought maybe if you came I would try to talk to you again,either win you back or lose you forever but at least I  would get some answers,"she paused and looked at her.

Carly didn't know where to begin.Her stupidity?No,she had said that a thousand times.They were standing in the driveway and her brother was waiting for her in the car with Taylor.

     "I can't say how sorry I am for doubting you.What I hate myself most for is the fact that I didn't even listen to what you had to say.That makes me the worst person ever and I am so sorry Dylan."

      "You are not a bad person Lee," she said and touched her  arm. "You were just scared of getting hurt and I understand that."

Instead of feeling better that Dylan was okay with what had happened,she felt even worse.She had hurt the person who had been good to her all through high school and who she now felt was too good for her.She felt her eyes sting with tears but she pushed them away.

      "I called you a dyke and a whore," she said."You didn't deserve that."

Dylan laughed,"Well I am a dyke but so are you." She joined in the laughter knowing it was true then Dylan went on,"As for the whore part,you did warn me that you weren't so good when I first talked to you in the gym.I should have listened I guess." She said smiling maybe trying to make fun out of it but Carly knew it had hurt her,probably still was even now but she went along with it.

     "Yeah,you should have." They laughed again before Dylan asked what she had known all along would come up and she had no idea how she would go about it.

     "So,what are you going to do about Emily?"

     "I honestly don't know.I don't know if I should be angry at her for what she did to us or if I should feel sorry for her for having to do it.It has to be hard for her to admit all that in front of everyone."

Dylan smiled,"See,you aren't so bad.I think I was right after all."

Carly smiled then looked towards the car,"I need to take some time to think.We'll talk soon?"

     "That's okay," she nodded.

Carly moved forward and hugged her.She felt Dylan place her hands on her back and pull her closer.They remained in that position for several seconds.Carly closed her eyes enjoying the moment.It had been so long since she felt so good.When they finally pulled apart,she met Dylan's eyes.She still looked at her the same way she used to.She placed a light kiss on her cheek then bid her goodbye and headed to the car.She got  in the back and let Taylor drive with her brother in front.

     "I'm just curious sis,is Dylan the one you used to sneak out with some months ago?"

     "Just shut up and drive," she said and Carl laughed.

     "But seriously,I didn't think you had such good taste."

     "Oh my God,don't tell me you have the hots for Dylan,"Taylor teased. "Because if it is so,Carly and I will skin you alive." 

     "Of course not,anyone who doesn't realize Dylan is gay is stupid."

     "I'm still shocked about Emily though,"Taylor said,"I mean,who would have thought?"

     "At first I though she was trying to get everyone's attention like she is used to but then I saw the tears fall and I knew it was serious," Carl said.

     "Yeah,it was pretty intense," Taylor agreed then turned to her," You were right,Emily does have a heart."

     "I know and now I'm the one left to make the big decision here and honestly I don't know what to do."

     "Fuck Emily,she has tortured half of us throughout high school.She doesn't deserve any pity," Carl said."You shouldn't think twice about Dylan."

 And yet here she was thinking twice.While she didn't feel anything for Emily,she felt everything for Dylan.But yet there was that underlying fear and she still didn't know what it meant.She wanted to be with her yet she  wasn't so sure.She had no idea if it was the fear of what had happened to them happening in real sense or if it was regret  for having hurt her while she hadn't done anything wrong and the fact that she had no hard feelings about it.

She remained silent for most part of the way until they dropped Taylor off and headed home.

   *****

  Dylan waited until Carly had disappeared inside the car and until they had driven off around the corner.She walked back inside the house.She was supposed to be happy that she had solved her relationship issues with Carly yet she felt like everything had turned much worse.She could see it in Carly's eyes,there was a certain conflict and hesitation.She didn't know if it came with what Emily had said.After all,they had gotten closer over the months and there was no telling that Carly didn't feel even a little bit the same for her.She had gone without telling her where they stood and that was the worst feeling.She found her mother waiting in the sitting room.She walked towards her and wound her arms around her waist then laid her head against her chest.

     "Oh sweetie," she said and kissed her head.

     "This is the worst birthday ever," she groaned.

     "Can I make it better?"

     "Yes please,let's make chicken fajitas."

     "I think you will like my idea better."

     "What could better than your homemade fajitas?"

     "We,are going out to celebrate."

      "My misery or what?"

      "Your license came," her mother replied.She looked up sharply.She had been waiting for it like forever because her mother promised her a car once she got her license. "I mean,we have to go collect it.It actually came some days ago but I knew it would make you happy so I decided I would tell you today."

     "I get to drive now?" she asked excitedly.

     "Well,I don't think you'll get your own car at least for a few months but you can take mine for the time being."

     "Thanks mom but I can wait until then.Me taking your car might be hard for you to get around.I have waited this long,a few more months is not much."

        An hour  later after they had picked up her license,the walked along the beach  enjoying cold drinks and the afternoon breeze.It was some  minutes to four in the evening and they had decided to take a stroll before getting dinner outside which only happened in rare occasions.This was just what Dylan needed to clear her head after what had happened.

     "This is why I like spending my birthday with you alone.It's always so cool and peaceful with no drama."

Her mother led her towards a bench where they sat sat down.

     "How are you feeling about everything?"

     "I don't know mom.At least I got to the bottom of what really made Carly break up with me and I should be happy but there is something about it that makes me wonder if we even stand a chance together again."

     "Are you afraid that she might choose the other girl who confessed her feelings for her?" Dylan looked a her questioningly wondering how she had known that.She had thought that the moment her mother walked in the room was just a coincidence. "I heard and saw everything.I was just coming for a drink when I saw you two."

Dylan's mouth hung open,"Even when we kissed?"

     "Yeah,even that which makes me sound like a pervert because I didn't move away." Dylan looked away,her face red with embarrassment. "Come on,it's not a thing to be embarrassed about," her mother went on.            "Anyway,what happened next was pretty intense so I am just wondering if you feel like that Emily person is a threat?"

      "Honestly yeah,"Dylan replied with a far away look. "She said we will talk but I am dreading it."

Her mother turned to her,"Whatever happens,you will be strong and will be okay because you are my champion.If Carly is the one meant for you,she will always come back no matter how long it takes."

Dylan leaned her head against her mother's shoulder briefly,"I love you mom."

     "I love you too sweetie.And before I forget,you owe me a bottle of wine.I saw you stealing from me," she added,"I won't scold you because you turned eighteen but you have to pay."

Dylan laughed,"We barely had a quarter of a glass.Why am I paying with a full bottle?"

 "Because those are the rules now,you steal a portion,you pay a whole lot."

 "Well in that case,how about a box of homemade cookies to replace the ones I had hidden in my room and found half  of them gone.They were a gift from Carly by the way.I wonder how you are going to get me those."

 "You are as sneaky as your father was." They looked at each other and laughed.Dylan of course didn't recall her dad but loved it when they joked or talked about him because he sounded like the best husband and she was sure he had been a great father too. "Let's go get dinner,Chinese  or Italian?"

 "Do you even have to ask me?Italian all the way."

   ******

  Carly walked inside their house with her brother.Even though they had teased and joked along the way,she was still trying to come to terms with what had happened earlier.The more she thought of Emily the more she pitied her.She cared less about her own situation now that everyone new who she was but for Emily it would be different.She would probably be teased and made fun of as payback for all those days of torture and using others for her personal gain.She had fell for it too but she didn't hold a grudge against her,partly because she had known what she was getting into and partly because she realized that Emily was just using the meanness and bitchiness for her own protection.She pretended to have an ice cold heart just so she couldn't face what she really was which was fragile.Carly wondered what the following weeks would be like up until graduation.Everything was changing so fast.

     "When do you plan on coming out to mom and dad?" Carl asked.

     "Not now.Dad will remain uninterested but you know mom will freak out and I don't want that until after high school.So,I prefer if you don't mention it," she replied and proceeded into the sitting room.

     "Your secret is safe with me sis.I won't say a word."

They found their mother waiting by the living room window impatiently.She had her phone in her hands and moved  towards them.From the look in her face,Carly knew something was extremely wrong.

     "Good,you are finally here," she said addressing Carly in a rough tone.

     "Mom,what's going on?" Carl asked.

     "That's what I want to know too from your sister here.I was resting peacefully waiting for you to come back home from whatever place you went to only to see this on instagram,"she replied and almost threw the phone into Carly's face.Carly caught it and on the screen was a video of them standing inside Dylan's house and there was no need to watch it to realize why her mother was so angry.And when did her mother join instagram?She turned to her brother.

     "I guess you won't have to carry the burden of keeping my secret after all."

     "What?You knew?"This time she addressed Carl.

     "It's not like she is sick or something.I found out a while ago and I'm totally okay with it." His tone was gentle yet teasing and Carly was happy they had found their way back to each other because she had no idea how she could have handled the situation without him. "At least she gets to be who she truly  is and not what you want  her to be.I'm happy for her."

Their mother shook her head,"Seriously,something is terribly wrong with you Carl.This getting along has changed you if you think that."

     "Trust me mom,even if I found out before we started getting along again,I would still think the same way.No one deserves to live a life they aren't happy and I mean no one."

Carly looked at him and smiled.He turned to her and winked then moved aside leaving an open mouthed mother.

     "I have always followed what you wanted me to do.Just let me do the things I want for myself."

     "This is ridiculous! You were supposed to be a normal girl,have a boyfriend who would hopefully marry you eventually.Be happy and have children.Not this kind of lifestyle."

     "I did tell you not to expect a boyfriend.You should have taken my word for it."

     "What happened to you Carly?"

     "Mom,are you still in the seventeenth century?" Carl asked shaking his head. "There's nothing wrong with being gay.She can  still have kids if she wants to and if she doesn't then I will give you grandchildren if you want that so bad."

     "Just go upstairs both of you.I don't want to hear this ridiculous talk right now."

Carly shook her head then looked directly into her eyes.She was too exhausted,especially mentally to continue with the conversation. "What's ridiculous is you thinking I'm abnormal for loving another girl." 

     "That's not love.You are a disappointment."

     "Come on sis,let's go." Carly followed her brother upstairs but instead of going to her room,she followed him to his which she hadn't done since they were fourteen.She preferred being in his company to being alone in her own bedroom drowning in thoughts. "Shall we play a computer game like we used to?" he asked.

 "I thought you'd never ask.I need a distraction."