DIFFERENT FEELINGS

         "Fine, I hid it from you!" Nora said sharply before Faith could leave the table. Faith paused and Nora rose to her feet.  "I hid it because I had no other choice." 

        "You had no other choice? When did you start having choices on what to tell me and what not to tell me?" 

        "It was because he asked that we keep it a secret," Nora cried. Tears have welled up in her eyes. 

       Faith's eyes widened and disbelief gleamed in them.  "We? Holy shit! Everyone else knows about this except for me?" 

        "I don't know who else knows, but it's Danny and me he told not to say a word." 

       "You know what? I don't have time for this." Faith turned to leave. 

       "He helped us!" Nora said again. Faith halted but didn't turn to look at her.  "I'm sure if you were in my shoes you would do the same. He did us a favour and this is the favour we did him back. Danny sank so low, that even the wedding we are planning for wasn't going to take place because he was completely bankrupt and he was losing himself with it. Ethan came to his rescue, he gave him that money and asked us to keep it quiet. 

      "If I had...if I had told you, I don't know what would be happening next and if he was going to ever trust us again to do anything like that again." She moved closer to Faith.  "Faith, Faith, I know this doesn't justify anything, but I want you to look at it from my own view, please. It was difficult for me too. No day passed that I didn't want to tell you. I was caught in between. I don't know anything about these allegations about him being gay or only using you, believe me, if I knew anything about it, you know I will choose you over anything. I just hope you understand where I am coming from. "

      Faith didn't say anything nor turned to look at her. She slowly wiped the tears that were running down her cheeks, blinked and walked away. 

      "Faith, please!" she called, but Faith kept walking like she wasn't hearing her. 

     Nora dropped down on the chair and sobbed. After sobbing for a while, she took out her kerchief and her phone, wiped her eyes and dialled Charlie. 

       "Hello, Charlie. I'm good. Can you meet me at our usual bar? It's urgent. Alright bye." 

       When Faith got home, Ethan wasn't at home or maybe he was, but there was no sign he was and she didn't care. She went straight to her room and fell on the bed. Her whole body craved alcohol. She wanted to drink and forget, but she can't drink too much because of the ulcer. She didn't want to bleed again and this time, she might not get lucky. 

       But she needed to heave that pain, that throbbing feeling of betrayal away from her chest. She sat up in bed and glanced towards her closet and after a while, she got up and got dressed in her tracksuit. This was going to do. She took out her earpiece, plugged it in and left the house. 

        She jogged slowly while the music played in her ears, but as she jogged, memories kept flooding into her head. Memories that overshadowed the music, she wasn't hearing the music anymore, all she saw were things that had occurred, things that had taken place in her life, Ethan, Noah, Nora, Charlie. Memories of them. As she thought of them, her tempo increased, she ran faster and faster until she was running out of breath and she ran now like she was running for a price and when those memories overwhelmed her, she screamed aloud and broke down on the road. 

      A few people hurrying along to one place or another looked her way, some looked at her with pity, while others scowled at her for startling them. Other than that, everyone went their way, minding their businesses. She knelt there, crying and the world suddenly became so big for her. 

       Charlie sighted Nora by a corner, she was looking all downcast. He hurried over to her table and slid into the opposite chair. 

         "Hey, are you alright? You sounded pretty upset over the phone," he said looking at her. 

       She looked up at him. Her eyes told him that she had cried. She stared at him like that for a while and he kept looking at her in confusion. 

       "Can you answer me honestly?" she asked. 

    Charlie was completely oblivious of what she was talking about, but her repositioned himself in his seat.  "What is this about?" 

       "Do you know who Ethan is?" 

       "You mean, Ethan Floyd? Faith's boyfriend?" Nora nodded.  "What's up with him?" 

         "You have not answered my question. Do you know who he is?" 

       Charlie who was deeper and deeper into confusion nodded and narrowed his eyes at Nora.  "What's all this about?" 

        "Why didn't you tell me?" Nora asked slowly. 

         "Nora, you are getting me all confused here. Tell you about what?  You know the guy more than I do know him. Are you drunk?" he asked peering into her face. 

           "Is he gay?" 

          "Gay? Gay?!" Charlie repeated louder.  "Why would you ask me that? Why do you think he is gay? He is so into Faith." 

     Nora pushed the newspaper towards him and he looked down at it, his brows drawn together in confusion. 

        "He hid his identity from us all... I mean from Faith, but he once helped Danny and I get through bankruptcy. Now, Faith found out about it and about who he was and now she is very mad at us all." 

       "Who he was? Us all? I need to be cleared about all of these. The only thing I see here is that he is an heir to this multi-billion company. Is there something else?" 

        "Are you having an affair with him?" 

 Charlie jerked back. "Now, Nora, you are beginning to piss me off with these really absurd questions." 

         "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I don't know what I am doing." 

         "What is going on?" 

          "Ethan has been suspected to be gay and Faith thinks you are his partner." 

          "What?! Charlie asked with a dropped jaw and dilated eyes. 

         Faith walked into the apartment as exhausted as ever. The living room was dark and she turned on the light. Ethan was seated on one of the couches, looking down at the floor. She started walking past him to her room. 

        "He said it was consensual," Ethan said, his voice being rough and slurred.  Faith halted and turned to face him.  He looked up at her.  "Noah, he said you had asked him to meet you at home and that you guys knew each other from way back." 

        "What? How do they explain the gun he was holding?" 

        "The gun was not loaded and he carried it about because he didn't trust you. He just held it for self-defence." 

       "Holy shit!" Faith exclaimed and lowered herself into the couch adjacent to him and clutched her chest.  

       "He said, he was trying to convince you that I wasn't the person you thought I was and you became aggressive and he had to bring out the gun, out of nervousness. He still loved you and only intended to save you from future heartbreak." 

      Faith ran her hands over her hair in complete exasperation. "I sent out a panic message!" 

     "They listened to the voice message and felt you were just shocked that he took out a gun. The gun wasn't loaded, so they said there was no way he was going to shoot you. He told them that you guys have just met to discuss as friends when you threatened to stab him if he doesn't leaves, so in other to make you listen, he took out that gun."

     "Oh, shit," Faith covered her face with her hands. 

  Ethan stood up and started towards his room.  "They need you to come to give your statement so that they can grant him bail," he said and stood to leave, but crashed to the floor. 

    Faith removed her hands from her face when she heard the thud and saw Ethan on the floor. She rushed quickly to him.  "Have you been drinking?" she asked when she bent down beside him and perceived the alcohol. 

     He burst into laughter that got Faith confused. He laughed until tears ran down his temple. "Should I not drink? You don't even want to see me." 

      "Let's leave that for now, let's get you fresh and clean," Faith said and tried to draw him up, but he drew her down instead and kissed her so deeply that her brain went numb. She was supposed to push away because she was angry at him but she couldn't bring herself to do that. 

    He released her. "I love you and I never intended to hurt you intentionally." 

     Faith sat on her butt, looking confused. She wiped her lips. She was supposed to be mad at him, her anger was not supposed to let her heart flutter, maybe because she ha d exhausted all her anger when she ran. 

      "Let's get you fresh and clean," she repeated.