I'm different, Miss Houston

Chapter one hundred and thirty-six

Xander was more stunned by her words. This woman, he could almost not believe his ears. She had the wildest kind of imagination. Of all the things she could imagine, she had to imagine him as a father? He almost laughed at the thought of that. It seemed so ridiculous to him. He couldn't even picture anything like that. 

"You imagined me as a father?" He asked again, to confirm if he heard right. 

"Of course. Why? Why do you look so amazed?" Anna asked as she noticed the look on his face.

"You would love to be a father someday, wouldn't you, Mr Williams?" It was Xander's time to laugh. He let out a hysterical laugh which almost shook the whole room and creases formed on the forehead of a perplexed Anna, wondering where that came from. She was wondering why he was laughing so hard. 

"You amuse me, Miss Houston." 

What was amusing about her question? Nearly every human being wanted a family, a family that they could call their own. Wasn't that one of the reasons for their existence? 

"I must say that you think too far sometimes." 

Did he say that she thought too far? She could barely understand him.

"Fatherhood is not for me, Miss Houston." He finally said, confirming her fears. This wasn't even about love again, fatherhood was also involved. 

"You don't want to ever be a father? Why?" Anna asked, gazing at him with a puzzled look on her face. Anna still couldn't comprehend why he would make this kind of decision. 

"Does it have anything to do with you not believing in love?" Anna found herself asking. She knew that she was prying but she couldn't help it. She was so curious to know why. She knew that he might not answer her but it was worth trying. 

"The idea is completely ridiculous to me. Do I look like a father figure to you?" He asked, raising her chin with his index finger. 

Truthfully, he looked nothing like a father figure. But a playboy? He'd pass as that, especially because he looked too handsome. His face was the kind that one should keep in the museum for admiration. In fact, having his kind of beauty should have been a crime. If he'd told her that he was a model when they met, she would have believed him. Not just because he had looks that could kill, his athletic build was also another selling point of his. But regardless, Anna still found this outrageous. He didn't have to look like a father to be one. 

"Something must have triggered your decision, Mr Williams. I don't think you can wake up one day and suddenly decide not to be a father." Anna wanted to get to the root of this. She sounded like an investigative journalist as she spoke, crinkles were visible on her forehead. 

"You are too inquisitive, Miss Houston. Tell me, why do you want to know? If your reason is good enough, I just might give it a thought." His voice was relaxed and his eyes peered at her bulging ones. 

"Is curiosity a good enough reason? Besides, it's a deviation from the norm, so I don't think it's strange that it piqued my interest, Mr Williams." Anna answered. 

"Hmm. A deviation from the norm." He mumbled, shaking his head as though he was contemplating something. 

"So, in other words, you want to satisfy your curiosity, which seems justified to you." He clarified and Anna nodded in response.

"I'm different, Miss Houston. I'm not like every other person. It's not my thing. It never was. It never will be. Fatherhood is just as bizarre as love is to me. I honestly can't imagine kids trolling after me. It's just- absurd to me." 

He'd said it, this was about him again. Anna was beginning to think of Xander as a narcissist. He appeared as though he didn't want to share himself with anyone at all. How could he call fatherhood bizarre? If his father had thought of it as a bizarre concept, then, he sure wouldn't have made it to the world. Anna however wasn't about to tell him that. She knew that all hell would be let loose if she mentioned it. She chose to keep mum instead. 

Anna shook her head in disagreement instead. 

"I don't think so, Mr Williams."