Chapter 84 - Gustavo's hell

At the end of the week, the circus performance would finally take place. For the public, there was no difference, nor would they know that there had been any changes behind the scenes. However, for a certain boy in his eighteenth year, that day would be as memorable as possible, which increased his anxiety.

He had been rehearsing all week and everything had gone well. The musicians were patient with him and went over the verses several times until he had memorised everything and cleared up his doubts. Gustavo only realised it was real when a stylist came to the studio to take his measurements and prepare his costume to match the show.

Even the band had to get ready and put on make-up, which only made his heart race even faster.

However, as soon as he set foot out of Dreamland and returned to the city, all that calm and comfort disappeared little by little, leaving only anxiety. 

Gustavo had told his parents about getting a part-time job, but didn't go into details. His mum seemed relieved to hear that Gustavo wasn't going to Rodie's bar anymore, but she would certainly have been angry if she'd known that he was still playing drums in a circus. 

Well, just the fact that his sister had taken that make-up course had already led to a heated argument, imagine if he opened his mouth to tell her where he was working.

— Come on, the band can get up on the mobile stage now!

— Nervous, little one?

It seems your nickname has been picked up by the band too, so that calmed him down a bit.

— Haha, it would be a lie to say it didn't.

— It's okay, you did well in rehearsals. The circus is dark during the performance, and we have lighting that helps us see the scores, so you just need to focus on that and ignore the rest.

Nodding his head, Gustavo followed the other members and climbed onto the mobile stage. It was like a small tower, where he climbed the stairs to find the drum set waiting for him. Sitting on the stool and positioning himself, he finally heard the noise of the crowd entering the tent.

Usually he would be there, eager to see the show. However, now Gustavo was on the other side. On stage.

Ah, his heart was about to burst out of his mouth.

Something caught his eye, a light going from one side to the other.

Looking in that direction, he saw Leonardo, Rafael and Juliano waving to him. On his mobile phone, a message came through wishing him good luck. 

A smile escaped his face.

Twirling his drumstick between his fingers, the drummer felt encouraged enough to do his best.

And so that night's show began.

Just as he did at the pub gigs, Gustavo dedicated himself to giving his best performance. And just as the band's guitarist had said earlier, Gustavo completely forgot about the presence of the audience as he concentrated on the scores and the conductor's command to accompany the artists.

As a drummer, he had an extra job to create an atmosphere of suspense during the performances. Could an aerialist stand under dozens of stacked chairs without falling? Could the trapeze artists jump high up without falling through the protective netting? There were times when Gustavo needed to play with the audience's emotions.

And that was the first time he felt something different.

When the show ended, Gustavo was greeted by his friends.

— Look at him, all cool!

— So proud of our golden boy.

— What do you say we have a drink to celebrate? — Leonardo invited — It's on me.

— Oh, how nice it is to be friends with a rich guy.

— Don't dream there'll be a next time, Rafinha.

— So I'm just going to change and take off my make-up. Wait for me!

It was always fun to be with your friends.

He always felt alive with them.

It felt like they could see your potential and give him the space to try whatever it took to show off your skills.

So different from how he felt when he was at home.

As soon as Gustavo had finished getting ready, the four friends went to Rodie's bar. This time they weren't going to play, but they were going to celebrate. 

Gustavo just didn't realise that things would explode in such a frightening way when he got home afterwards.

— Can you really cope with looking after them, Leo? If you want, I can help you, since they can't even stand up.

— It's all right, little one. You've already done a lot by hiding their glass and pretending that Mrs. Berta's stock has run out. 

— Hehe, I only did what I could, it would be better if they rested tomorrow as they have to start their apprenticeship again next week. But you're the busiest of us... If you need anything...

Leonardo stroked Gustavo's hair and smiled amusedly.

— I need you to never follow their example and avoid drinking. The rest is fine. 

So kind. Leonardo was so incredible that Gustavo couldn't compare to him. 

And as soon as he saw the car turn the corner, Gustavo silently prepared to get in. All that delicious, victorious feeling left his body like a mist carried by the wind.

The moment he stepped into the house, he was greeted with shouts.

— I knew it! I knew you were with her! 

Another fight. Gustavo was too tired to stay there. 

His mother was so obsessed with his father that it was annoying. Anything was a reason for her angry outbursts. In the end, she didn't even realise that her own children were paying the price.

He would completely ignore the screams and broken objects that her mother would hurl in anger. He would let his father sort it out, as he always did.

He no longer had the energy to put up with it.

As soon as he passed through the living room and went into the corridor to climb the stairs to his bedroom, Gustavo found his older sister leaning against the wall waiting for him. All she did was hold out her hand, calling him silently, and Gustavo climbed step by step to go to his sister. 

He just needed to be with her and then they could pretend not to hear anything until he went to sleep and woke up in silence.

His sister could make him forget that noise.

— Gustavo!

His mother's scream woke him from his stupor. He barely noticed her coming towards him, only realising she was there when he felt her grab his shoulder and pull him up the stairs.

— Mum?

— You stink! You were in that den too, weren't you? I told you not to be like your father and go to that whorehouse! 

— I only went out with my friends...

— Why don't you obey me? Do you like making your mum cry like your dad? Why do you have to be so much like him...?

— Let the boy go, he's done nothing wrong — intervened his father.

— This is all your fault! If you hadn't fallen into the clutches of that shameless bitch!

— I said nothing happened!

— I won't let you lead my boy down the same path! — She shouted, grabbing Gustavo's wrist and pulling him up the stairs — Come on, Gustavo, Mum's going to teach you to be a good boy...

— Let me go, Mum!

— Mum, let go of Gustavo!

The father tried to release Gustavo from his wife's grip, but he ended up being pushed. The only reason he didn't fall was because he was holding onto the handrail, but it certainly annoyed him. She wouldn't let go of Gustavo for the world, the boy's wrist hurt from the grip. 

It was always like that. For some reason she saw her youngest son as a lifeboat or something.

Why was this happening to him?

What had he done wrong?

Gustavo closed his eyes, longing for an end to this hell.

— Enough of this fighting.

— Mum! Let Gustavo go, otherwise you'll hurt him.

The mess escalated when his older sister also intervened in the fight to let Gustavo go. And it all happened so quickly that all the boy heard was a scream and a noise. When the silence came, a chill seemed to herald a terrible omen.

— I-Isabel?

— What...

Opening his eyes, all he saw was his older sister lying at the foot of the stairs.  From then on, it was like an incomprehensible blur.

Why?

What the hell was going on there?

His parents left the fight and went to help the girl lying on the floor. Gustavo was unable to move, staring in astonishment at the figure of his sister. Even when his parents called the ambulance and the house got even noisier, he was just a shadow on that staircase. 

Ignored by everyone and unable to understand what on earth had happened.

It was his father who dragged him to hospital to have his wrist examined and bandaged. He hadn't been seriously injured, but the situation had come as a great shock to the boy. 

In the early hours of that morning, none of the three said a word as they waited outside the operating center.

But at some point, Gustavo fell asleep on his father's shoulder, who was hugging him warmly. And for the first time, he dreamt vividly.

A man who looked incredibly similar to his friend's secretary, only with hair as black as darkness, was holding out his hand in invitation.

— Come to me, poor child.